What do you do when you have a mother who will never find anything good in what you do.I try my best to please her but she finds fault in everything i do.Am the last born in a family of two and my elder brother is always treated better than i am.She hurts me so much and i cant take it anymore.I get good grades,am obedient,i do the house chores ,so why this hate and am not ugly because i hear some parents hate ugly children.She is making my life miserable!I feel like talking back at her but i cant because i still respect her but this respect is slowly fading.Each time i tell my dad and he confronts her she accuse him of taking sides.Help.

Just take it easy, i understand, Please keep respecting her as you grow older you both are gonna be very close and even inseperable, its commong btwn girls and thier moms especially when the girls are in their formative years

I guess all I can say is that she's your mother, and for now, she is responsible for your life. Unless you want to out-right rebel against her and leave home, all I can tell you to do is to live with it and hope your mother comes to a realization on how much she is torturing you. Unfortunately for humans, we can't choose our parents.

mindeh:

and am not ugly because i hear some parents hate ugly children.

God loves you as you are. I have a very critical mother, it used to get on my nerves until I understood that God's opinion is what matters. It may also be that she wants the best for you and her criticism is her way of saying "you can do better". I didn't understand that about my mum until I turned 30.

Pray for more patience.

If you don't get it, pray for the wisdom to talk back like an adult. Deal with the issue at hand calmly and tell her why you disagree. I had to give my dad small pepper b4 he stopped hassling me all the time. And yes, at some point i felt like this too. And he's mellowed now.

yea sometimes mothers can be annoying but we got to suck it up

I suggest you talk to your mother, I don't know how it works where you are, but in some households boys are treated better because they 'stay' whereas the girls marry and leave the home, so they are expected to excell in everything because they'll be representing where and how they were raised when they get to where they are meant to be. Ask your mother what the issues are, how old are you anyhow?

pray and fast

I'm also in your shoes,but i'm pulling free now but not out yet.u need to start by totally accepting her&her actions,then think more of yourself improve ur self esteem and do thing that please u and not ur mum everytime.hang with good friends dat can help with opportunties with ur careers and hang out.u'l from em.stand up for urself in the house but not too long 4 a serious arguement.she loves u,but u should know u re different from ur bro.,her reaction to u will be different.im 25 and my mum chases my gf and other girls away from me,but she has stopped dat now

noone can make you feel inferior without your consent.

ignore the bad, not her. she says something negative you know is untrue, leave it be and think positive.

Dont stop loving,repscting and treating her like ur mother.Love works wonders.
May God give u the needed strenght and grace.

Eya, i feel for you. I have never experienced what you feel but i know it hurts deeply.
Keep persevering and showing her excessive love. All will be well.

Learn to leave her to her own device, like someone already mentioned, its a common phenomenon, and girls tend to be close to their Dad. As long as she doesn't hit you, learn to tune her out when she starts nagging.

If it helps, do all that is required of you at home, then bone her side, you could also capitalise on your close relationship with your Dad and spend more time with him, but refrain from reporting your Mum to him all the time to avert them becoming each other's sworn enemies. Console yourself with the thoughts that he married her, hence knows her character, hence the reason he always defends you.

tallgal:
God loves you as you are. I have a very critical mother, it used to get on my nerves until I understood that God's opinion is what matters. It may also be that she wants the best for you and her criticism is her way of saying "you can do better". I didn't understand that about my mum until I turned 30.

correct

As a mum I can tell you I have a son who gets great grades and helps in the house but I am constantly on him because.
- he gets good grades but does not spend enough time reading.
-is laid back and day dreams too much
- needs to be woken up
- can do things in a snail tempo.
It absolutely irritates me because I know that you need more than good notes in life. I want him to learn to be reliable, consistent and have self discipline.
Why am I writing this?
Your mother has noticed some things about you that need to be corrected. You think they are minor issues but they are very important.
As soon as you correct them she will leave you in peace.
it would be nice if you could give instances of what she complains about.

mutter:
As a mum I can tell you I have a son who gets great grades and helps in the house but I am constantly on him because.
- he gets good grades but does not spend enough time reading.
-is laid back and day dreams too much
- needs to be woken up
- can do things in a snail tempo.
It absolutely irritates me because I know that you need more than good notes in life. I want him to learn to be reliable, consistent and have self discipline.
Why am I writing this?
Your mother has noticed some things about you that need to be corrected. You think they are minor issues but they are very important.
As soon as you correct them she will leave you in peace.
it would be nice if you could give instances of what she complains about.

your posts are always meaningful...kudos to you.

mindeh:
What do you do when you have a mother who will never find anything good in what you do.I try my best to please her but she finds fault in everything i do.Am the last born in a family of two and my elder brother is always treated better than i am.She hurts me so much and i cant take it anymore.I get good grades,am obedient,i do the house chores ,so why this hate and am not ugly because i hear some parents hate ugly children.She is making my life miserable!I feel like talking back at her but i cant because i still respect her but this respect is slowly fading.Each time i tell my dad and he confronts her she accuse him of taking sides.Help.

We parents are harder on those we love the most. We always want them to do better and fly higher.

let us look at it this way. maybe she is preparing you to be a better person/ mother to be. how you can face a difficult mother-in law. it could be a blessing in disguise.

just hang in there, if you are 22 and above, it is a matter of few years.