ClassicQueen:
As a woman what do you do if almost all the women and wives in a family you married have beef for you simply because you are prettier, more educated, lucky, intelligent, younger and dress better? This is my dilemma

Even some of his brothers are not left out I am afraid they are beginning to have grudges and gossip about me what will happen when I start bringing in kids? Please experienced couples and women I really need your advice on how to deal with this. Thanks

If everyone has a problem with you then you need to check yourself. You just may be the problem.

If 5 people tell you you're drunk, you better go lie down.

Ishilove:

If everyone has a problem with you then you need to check yourself. You just may be the problem.

If 5 people tell you you're drunk, you better go lie down.

That's a lie. It's not always so. It is better to check and know the mindset of those 5 individuals. Who knows, it may be cos they're jealous of you that's why they're telling you that.

AHCB:
That's a lie. It's not always so. It is better to check and know the mindset of those 5 individuals. Who knows, it may be cos they're jealous of you that's why they're telling you that.

Well, there's a popular proverb: "the mad man thinks the whole world is mad"

You have a point, but at the same time I wonder why 'almost' the entire family doesn't like her.

ClassicQueen:
Lol @100 naira Davis pencil. The only one that dosnt feel intimidated among them and is close to me is the one having issues with them. We are close and share problems 2geda @d saame time I don't have friends and enemies among them all I roll with all of tthem even when she try to gossip about them 2me, I pretend not to hear.

I can relate with your story. I have the same thing happening to me. At first,the ladies couldn't come up with a single reason for their antagonism. Later they came up with I am too quiet. When that didn't hold water, they are chanting pride. I tried to practically lick their feet but the disrespect even got worse. The envy is so bad that my MIL tells me every time that she doesn't like the way my skin shines. That I have to become dark like them. Mind you, I am not even a fair person, I just have a nice chocolate complexion.

The best advice I can give is what I told myself. Forget them. Do your duties as a DIL and a wife. Don't even put out yourself trying to please anyone anymore. The more you persist, the more they insult you. Most people especially those who grew up in little towns and haven't been exposed to different cultures can be very narrow minded.

PaperLace:
First things first, we have to be so sure you're not the problem. I hate to sound like this, but I have to.
The way you listed out your qualities, I have a strong feeling you rub your Harvard status in their face. It might not be intentional, but you do it all the same. Check yourself well.

When you're with them, keep your sophistication aside. You know our culture appreciates humble wives? Humility dear!!
Whether real or pseudo-humility, sha tone down your pride.

I can never forget the smile on any MIL's face when I saw her doing akpu and I showed her an easier way. Told her it is my favourite swallow and we produced it for commercial purposes way back _so, I can do it with my eyes closed. She was bamboozled...
We spent the whole day gisting while making akpu for her group. I enjoyed our chat and since then, if we're not processing akpu, it's palm oil . Na that time she dey use teach me family planning and their plenty culture.

By Monday, I wore my heels and continued slaying _everybody is happy.

Lol this post got me dearie
Thats d way hahaha real women do.
Im.so jealous why can i fund ur type dearie

fluxbush:
I can relate with your story. I have the same thing happening to me. At first,the ladies couldn't come up with a single reason for their antagonism. Later they came up with I am too quiet. When that didn't hold water, they are chanting pride. I tried to practically lick their feet but the disrespect even got worse. The envy is so bad that my MIL tells me every time that she doesn't like the way my skin shines. That I have to become dark like them. Mind you, I am not even a fair person, I just have a nice chocolate complexion.

The best advice I can give is what I told myself. Forget them. Do your duties as a DIL and a wife. Don't even put out yourself trying to please anyone anymore. The more you persist, the more they insult you. Most people especially those who grew up in little towns and haven't been exposed to different cultures can be very narrow minded.

Jesus how can a MIL tell a DIL that her skin shines too much? God frobid bad thing...my dear you are right people that have not really been exposed are really narrow minded I agree with u on that statement even so called graduates that lack exposure always have issues and feel intimidated. I will only do my duties as a wife and DIL and leave that is all. So much to take as a wife in Marriage na wah lol.

Ishilove:

If everyone has a problem with you then you need to check yourself. You just may be the problem.

If 5 people tell you you're drunk, you better go lie down.

Well not always true and in this case not everyone have a problem with me.

ClassicQueen:
As a woman what do you do if almost all the women and wives in a family you married have beef for you simply because you are prettier, more educated, lucky, intelligent, younger and dress better? This is my dilemma

Even some of his brothers are not left out I am afraid they are beginning to have grudges and gossip about me what will happen when I start bringing in kids? Please experienced couples and women I really need your advice on how to deal with this. Thanks

........simply because you are prettier, more educated, bla bla bla how funny.
the truth is your in laws can't hate you for no reason there is definitely a cause of it and from your point I don't think it is from the above you wrote, I think the problem is actually from you.
if you can't change your ways now and know how to live with your inlaws peacefully instead of claiming prettier and more lucky you might continue to have issues with them at your own peril.
and know this dont think you know you husband he will always love and care for you and support you, know that this are his family they have know him even before you ever imagine of meeting or date him, I know this maybe sound harsh but if you don't change your ways with time your husband may pick your side at first but later he will always be with his mom and family especially mom, then he will start thinking of cheating or changing you and if by then you have a child or children for him that is when really trouble start,he might make you a single mother or try convincing you to please accept the young girl he just impregnated that his family likes.
so the ball is in your court, settle with your husband family and drop your more prettier and intelligent or keep forming" I am his legal wife accept it or not or i can't change you have to love me for who I am" like I said he back you for sometime and go back to his family in the long run especially his mom,we men don't joke with our mothers.
this is a fact

OLAJADON:

........simply because you are prettier, more educated, bla bla bla how funny.
the truth is your in laws can't hate you for no reason there is definitely a cause of it and from your point I don't think it is from the above you wrote, I think the problem is actually from you.
if you can't change your ways now and know how to live with your inlaws peacefully instead of claiming prettier and more lucky you might continue to have issues with them at your own peril.
and know this dont think you know you husband he will always love and care for you and support you, know that this are his family they have know him even before you ever imagine of meeting or date him, I know this maybe sound harsh but if you don't change your ways with time your husband may pick your side at first but later he will always be with his mom and family especially mom, then he will start thinking of cheating or changing you and if by then you have a child or children for him that is when really trouble start,he might make you a single mother or try convincing you to please accept the young girl he just impregnated that his family likes.
so the ball is in your court, settle with your husband family and drop your more prettier and intelligent or keep forming" I am his legal wife accept it or not or i can't change you have to love me for who I am" like I said he back you for sometime and go back to his family in the long run especially his mom,we men don't joke with our mothers.
this is a fact

ah ah its not my fault na u are just blaming me alone. Na wah o. Thanks 4d harsh advice sha

ClassicQueen:
ah ah its not my fault na u are just blaming me alone. Na wah o. Thanks 4d harsh advice sha

am sorry if the advice is insultive I only based my judgement based on what you typed above, like I said before the ball is in your court it is the way you act with your husband family that will determine the way they will act with you

OLAJADON:

am sorry if the advice is insultive I only based my judgement based on what you typed above, like I said before the ball is in your court it is the way you act with your husband family that will determine the way they will act with you

Ok thanks. But the best thing in all is for one to mind his or her business especially a woman to her inlaws.

The woman has got someone enticing her with luxury to the point that she begins to conclude that her husband is stingy. As day passes after day, her interest in the marriage diminishes, while she sees reasons to fall for the imaginary world that entices her.

Please involve the in-laws before anything evil happens to any of you. Let there be a witness from amongst your in-law to talk to you both and the conclusion will determine your next decision.

Shalom!

BiafranBushBoy:
it is your type that would be shouting "Divorce his ass" here on Nairaland...

I guess you are getting scared now right??

if you like don't be loyal... they just gonna fling your "Slay" face outta the house!!

This comment still cracks me up anytime I read it. Lol at slay face

Please how can I delete or tell the mods to delete a topic I created? Thanks

By the way, dem still dey beef me sha but I no send anymore...

ClassicQueen:
This comment still cracks me up anytime I read it. Lol at slay face

Please how can I delete or tell the mods to delete a topic I created? Thanks

Lol... Hope they've not thrown you out

You can tell mynd44

BiafranBushBoy:


Lol... Hope they've not thrown you out

You can tell mynd44

Send me out keh i later realized they are all jealous my Mumsy in law love me to pieces still in my house for omugwo after 4months i heard she didnt do half of what she is doing for me for any of them so jealousy dey worry dem and i am so accommodating to pieces. me and my bobo dey enjoy our marriage and things are going on smoothly with plenty money. Thank you Jesus

I should send him a mail right? Thanks