Dear Unbrokenchords, my name is Arlene ( Not real name though but close to my name)

First, i will use this opportunity to say well done for a platform like this where people can share their life experience and ordeal without anyone knowing who they are.

My heart goes out to all especially the rape victims, yes, i read every one of the stories

I was only interested when a friend of mine managed to convince me that the pictures are not the real people but only used to illustrate the story and also when I sent a message on facebook to ask if it’s true, I liked the way you people response.

I know my story is what some women have experienced and some are still going through it. I am sharing this story to please get people to give me their opinion, if I am wrong or right, please tell me.

I left my marriage about four years ago when it became unbearable. I did everything within my power not to leave, initially my strength was in my husband who I thought was on my side until i knew better.

Last week here memories came flooding back to when my ex sister in-law sent me a friends request, I came on face book and i se this friends request waiting there for me to cofirm, I saw the name but had to be double sure I was not in a dream, went to view the page, low and behold it was indeed the right person.

I went into a panic mood, started palpitating like I was going to pass out, then I got red with anger, how dare she, this same girl that took me back to hell together with my mother in-law.

I remember every single day of her stay and my mother in-law in my house then, those two dealt with me, I will leave home in the morning for work, by the time I get home, the kitchen sink will be piled with dishes from the all sorts.

I use to wonder what they were always doing everyday making such mess, anyways that was the daily punishment from them to me, for me to wash dirty dishes.

I did not find this much of an issue, but the attitude that get to me, the right in my face talk as I was yet to have a child, my sister in law will walk up to me and tell me to hurry up as she wants to use the kitchen and will remind me to make sure it’s clean enough.

This was not a one off, like daily bases, it was all a very calculated attempt to get rid of me. My mother in-law will always remind me how am just temporary, that the son will soon get a wife, saying girlfriends move out when real wives move in.

A lot went on , but as an African woman I felt it was my cross to make my marriage walk, all that matters was my husband was on my side, though he has never openly spoken to the mum or sister about it, he only ever encourage me to ignore them and focus on us.

Then my husband started having an affair, they even knew before me, God, I went through hell, though they did not tell me to my face, they will always taunt me, especially my sister in-law, saying “shine your eyes Aunty me, your eyes go soon clear” and then walks away.

I suspected but was too scared it might be true, so I pretended about it and hoped it was a lie.

My world came crashing on the day my mother in-law was to leave our place for hers, she just walked right into our bedroom as was the norm, she never knocks neither say hello.

She walked right in as always, ignored my greetings as always, looks straight at the Son and said ” I hope the next time I return Yetunde (not real name) will be here, she needs all the care and support from you and us” and she just walked away, like that.

I was confused, could not really understand what she meant, i turned to my husband for with that look of please, ‘tell me what she’s on about’ but none was forthcoming.

I stormed out, for once in my life, I spoke to my mother in-law with a raised voice, demanding to know what that was all about, my sister in-law who was living with us came out, looked at me in this pity way, I will never forget what she said that day

‘ i told you to shine your eye, aunty wife, mama is only advising brother to take care of his pregnant girlfriend, soon to be wife’ and she hissed and walk away.

That was the beginning of my nightmare, my husband would not confirm or deny anything rather he stopped talking to me, stopped eating food prepared by me. I became a resident of ‘Mountain on fire church’

Long story short, I had to leave, I was left with no choice when I started seeing pictures of the pregnant lady on my timeline as we have my sister in-law as common friends.

The day I told myself, this was no marriage anymore, was the day I got to know through facebook that my husband has bought another car, the lady took a picture with the car and shared it with my sister in-law.

Late last year, I was told by a friend that the women has left my ex but not before dealing with them all, she is yet to tell me the full details, I will share it here once i get to know.

Now this sister in law that de-friended me even before I left the brother is now sending me a friend request, I don’t understand, for what I ask myself.

I have not even narrated what I went through, my concern why am sharing this today, is why does she want to be my friend? A girl that once spat at me, a girl that calls me a nobody and a prostitute, saying their family juju will soon kill me if I don’t confess.

The question is, why does she want to be my friend now? The brother, my ex relocated abroad I heard.

Please email us with any story you want to share. Email unbrokenchords@gmail.com OR unbrokenchords@yahoo.com.

Remember, at Unbrokenchords,we do not ever use real names or pictures, we don’t ever!

Our motive is to bring victims and survivor to a meeting point.

Sharing our stories will help struggling victims to find hope AND help survivors to have a better understanding, knowing there are others who have gone through similar.

SHARE YOUR STORY TODAY TO HELP OTHERS UNDERSTAND BETTER. SHARING IS THE START OF THE HEALING PROCESS.

UNBROKEN WE STAND! TOGETHER WE KEEP STRINGING OUR CHORDS FOR A BETTER TOMORROW.
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