netotse:

i wonder how many ppl got what chamo was saying. . .

@chamo
you will not kill me o. . .lmao

chaircover:

Dont mind Prof Chamo

@Netotse
Like Chaircover has said . . . . Dnt mind me o

That comment kinda shook me a little. I thought to myself, whick kain advice be that
I was about to say if she cant take in the morning and she also cant take it in the night . . . . . is she only going to be taking it in the afternoon?
Do I have to start rushing in from work to meet deadlines since she cant take it at night . . . . . .
. . . . . . . .until I saw her next line.

When in trouble with your husband or spouse, never ever talk about these problems with your friends, mother or parents, if you want a real help on this , go to your spouse or husband mother or father or his best mate or relative and tell them about the situation.

Another secret of a happy marriage is a short tongue. Instead of saying the first thing that pops into your head to your spouse in a heated discussion, bite your tongue, and consider the consequences before proceeding

All that glitters is not gold, never use other people/relationships as yardstick
Make sure your partner remains your friend
The above are elixir to my marrige

Temilade£:

When in trouble with your husband or spouse, never ever talk about these problems with your friends, mother or parents, if you want a real help on this , go to your spouse or husband mother or father or his best mate or relative and tell them about the situation.

i guess that must have been the "worst" advice she ever heard because it made absolutely no sense.

Another good advice: there are no rules in love that can fit everybody. Make your own rules (with your partner), build your own relationship according to them. Don't follow other people's example (even if their marriage is great), it might not work for you

love this ,
best

No third parties
Trust him , dont go by the theory that all men are dogs

worst

Dont let your husband know everything
Hide some of your income
Your husband needs to listen to the voice of elders -

~Sissy~:


finally, she said the biggest one is GOD. she told me, remember there are three people involved in a marriage. God, you and your spouse. [/b]if you take God out of the equation, you will have a hard time balancing things out. NEVER forget him. [b]make him the captain of your marriage. you will encounter many storms and waves of the ocean in your marriage, but with God in charge, you will NEVER be shaken 

I concur. Marriage is like a 3 legged stool. God ,husband and wife. There is no 2 legged stool.

this thread is really interesting.

Best and worst all in a sentence: You are on your own

aisha2:

Best and worst all in a sentence: You are on your own

Chaii!!! LOL

@ Brown

The first one on the funny ones, got me Lmaoing!!! Very funny indeed!

Funny/best: if you think you cant control your spending, honey, give your husband the checkbook!

Good: Be that spouse you would want to come home everyday to.

Best: my children, you can never know each other enough. everyday in your marriage is a learning experience. you might see/know things you never knew about each other. always keep your mind and heart open.

aisha2:

Best and worst all in a sentence: You are on your own

haha that is the best/worst in every situation

Best(From My mum to My Cousin): Is it so hard to comprehend? Respect your husband! If he says you shouldn't go out, Sit down and Paint your nails or Watch African Magic!

Worst(From My Military Uncle to The same cousin): Bia (come), All these Grammar is rubbish, if your husband has forgotten too soon, remind him of the type and Caliber of Family you come from!

WORST ADVICES GLEENED FROM NAIRALAND AND NUMEROUS BRIDAL SHOWERS


Your Husband is your first born, get ready to be his Mother and learn to pick up after him and wait on him patiently Like WTF!!!


Be ready to overlook a lot of things, learn the art of patience and tolerance, if you strongly suspect he is cheating, stay strong, look the other way, continue to pray for him, its either the devil doesn't want you to be happy IN YOUR MARITAL HOME or the girl could have jazzed him, even if you catch him on top of another woman, are you going to pack out of the house and be a divorcee


Even if your man don't come home for a week, you should be thankful you are Mrs Somebody/you have a roof over your head/you are someone's wife/you are not a single parent/blah blah blah







And then the females in attendance would start reeling off how their man doesn't come home in days/weeks/months/even years, and how they have no choice than to hold body together somehow somehow


Had a friend whose neighbour came to gossip and told her to be careful of the guy whom she was seeing that she knew the guy and also knew he was living with his girlfriend. When my friend responded thus "He is my Husband", the tatafo neighbour nearly fainted in shock, it wasn't even funny that day

^^^^ Are you a comedian! ---- hahahaha

Nezed:

Worst(From My Military Uncle to The same cousin): Bia (come), All these Grammar is rubbish, if your husband has forgotten too soon, remind him of the type and Caliber of Family you come from!

ROFTLMAO!!!!

I like this!!! Comes in handy when you have abusive husbands who think they can treat you like a piece of droppings and get away with it.

@ B-B
 LMAO!!! You this woman you're too much!!!

Go into marriage with the heart what can I do to make it work not what can I get from this marriage

^^^^ true

Bad: come oo listen make i tell you something, dont give your MIL or SIL or any of your husbands family member for dat matter, any chance oo. always, and i warn, always be proactive when dealing with them oo. cos if you dey there, dey do eyes pett-pett, na so 'em go use you  N put u for their armpit and close. na then u go come back here come dey complain, i no go listen oo. no say i no warn you oo. shine your eyes oo.

Mother to her son in law:

"my son, i want you to take very good care of my daughter. Marriage is not and will ever be an easy journey. you will encounter many bad days, if not years in marriage, always remember the reason why you married her. i want to especially request of you something very dear to me, DONT EVER HIT MY DAUGHTER. I, and her father has been married for many decades now, we both had arguments and intense disagreements which are eventually inevitable in marriage and in all those times, he NEVER lifted a finger on me. i want to make you promise that if you ever hit my daughter, i will shoot you dead. mark my words. i dont tolerate and will not tolerate domestic abuse of any kind especially on my daughters."

Mother to daughter:

"Always honor and respect your husband and dont go looking for trouble where there is none.remember he is and always be the head of the family. never forget you place in the home, first of all as a wife and a mother. watch the kinds of friends you keep as a married woman, some will come to destroy, while you came to build.  always communicate with each other and try to settle things between you two amicably. dont forget to pray together every day. be a virtuous woman in your home, remember either of you is perfect, so dont expect perfection in marriage. Always remember this, compromise, patience, forgiveness, caring and preserverance,love and sacrifice. you both should always try to cherish each and every moment you spend together. i will always be here for both of you, if you ever need me"

;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d

From an aunt to me

If he slaps you,slap him so hard that he gets dizzy,run into the room and lock the door for one hour.do not take rubbish.


Grandmama:

Always keep an eye out for a man who respects you and listens to you.Of what good to you is a man who does not value or even listen to your own opinion.Allow him to think he's the man,we all know it is you that pulls the strings behind the curtain.

hispinkolo:

From an aunt to me

If he slaps you,slap him so hard that he gets dizzy,run into the room and lock the door for one hour.do not take rubbish.


Grandmama:

Always keep an eye out for a man who respects you and listens to you.Of what good to you is a man who does not value or even listen to your own opinion.Allow him to think he's the man,we all know it is you that pulls the strings behind the curtain.

LMAOOOOOO

Good advice:
The way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Never relent in your culinary skills.

Always make sure his meals are ready the way he likes them!

This happen to be so true!

Iranoladun:

Good advice:
The way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Never relent in your culinary skills.

Always make sure his meals are ready the way he likes them!

This happen to be so true!

still rings true!

Best: marriage doesnt come with a manual and nothing prepares or will never prepare you for the journey ahead. you discover and rediscover your own rules/boundaries base on what works best for you.

i thought this was an Interesting response from Agatha in the Dear Agatha segment in IN and coincidentally it corresponds to the purpose of this thread


QUESTION: "Dear Agatha as a young man aspiring to marry, I want to know the most important thing in marriage"


Agatha's ANSWER:

[b]get prepared for any eventuality you may find yourself in when you get married, because marriage has a way of turning out to be very different from what we thought it to be. Unlike the distant image of perfection we have of marriage, it is often windy, steeply, turbulent, traumatic, disappointing and above all plenty of sacrifices as well as adjustments to ensure its survival.

Unlike the bread and butter image we have of it, marriage is more like a bitter-leaf experience. It takes plenty of tolerance, dedication and hard work to get to its sweet end.


That you love a person doesn’t mean that person is incapable of hurting or causing you pains. This is one thing you must always have at the back of your mind. The one who today appears to be perfect for you could after marriage turn out to be a monster, just as you are capable of changing from all the good things to bad things. These changes are often not planned for. There are a lot of stresses in marriage capable of causing these dramatic changes in one’s thinking and attitudes.

The thing is when these things come, they should be treated as subjects, not as major problems. Usually the solution to every challenge in life is the perception we have of it. The label we give it often than not influences the results we get. If given a label of impossibility, it ends up remaining irresolvable, no matter what others around say or do to help the situation.

Therefore, for you to have a happy marriage, have a broad mind, one, which will enable you give every problem its proper categorization with a view of sorting it out amicably. Failure to compartmentalize a problem, deal and trash it before it gets infested with viruses will only at the end of the day slow down whatever efforts you and your partner are making in other areas to grow and stabilize the union. This is where the Bible’s principle comes in to never allow any issue goes beyond the dusk of that day. Having agreed to spend the rest of your lives together, you both must have the necessary commitment and boldness to confront any issue head-on.


Another thing that must be appreciated for a marriage to work well is the differences in our persons. Before being part of a couple, you are first a human being, one whose ways of life is set along certain lines as a result of the cultural, social, moral and religious values of the family one emerges from. Knowing that these differences have to be accommodated at every point in time is one of the keys to the success of marriage. These differences are meant to give a relationship or marriage its unique character, hence wise couple have learnt to weave them together to their advantage.

Also, you must learn the act of being faithful now. It is imperative to the success of a couple’s stay together. There is no way your wife would respect and trust you if you are constantly caught with other women or known to be a liar. Over time, you risk losing your leadership role as the head of the house due to persistent acrimony between you and your wife over unfulfilled promises resulting from infidelity.

You must at all time see your mate as your best friend, one who has your best interest at heart hence must know everything, including money matters. For this reason, when looking for a life partner, care should be taken to look beyond the physical beauty of that person to what the person has within. The inside qualities are the things that give a person the strength of character to make positive changes in his or her environment. This is what envelops the commitment aspect of any one.

Above all, marriage is tolerance, sacrifices, endurance, patience, understanding, faith, loyalty, mutual respect and responsibility. A marriage laced with suspicions lacks the right foundation to stand the test of time. [/b]

Someone likened catching a cheating spouse caught in the act to a leaking roof and asked "WOULD YOU LEAVE A LEAKING ROOF TO LEAK OR ATTEMPT TO MEND IT"

I no sabi whether this na good or bad advice, but i DEFINITELY know i no be roofer or carpenter or joiner or whacchumacallit. And what am i supposed to be mending or patching? The trespassing ho's leaking roof/kitten OR my errant man's nail that caused the roof/toto to be leaking? ! ! !

Don't compare your marriage with other peoples marriage b/c they will do or say things to tickle your ears

Don't believe every other couple is happier than you. Try and find peace within yourself

Busy_body:

Someone likened catching a cheating spouse caught in the act to a leaking roof and asked "WOULD YOU LEAVE A LEAKING ROOF TO LEAK OR ATTEMPT TO MEND IT"

I no sabi whether this na good or bad advice, but i DEFINITELY know i no be roofer or carpenter or joiner or whacchumacallit. And what am i supposed to be mending or patching? The trespassing ho's leaking roof/kitten OR my errant man's nail that caused the roof/toto to be leaking? ! ! !

i like that analogy!. it would either be a good/bad advice depending on how the person answers the roof question.

rubi:

Don't compare your marriage with other peoples marriage b/c they will do or say things to tickle your ears

definitely agree with this. many couple tend to parade their marriage as this "happy, model" marriage that is sure to make you question your own abilities and your marriage, while in reality these so called 'happy, loving, model marriages" are rocky and neck tugging marriages.

Don't compare your hubby with another man.
If you have a mind set that men are the same, believe your hubby is different and perfect.