Hello nairalanders, pls help me. Am seriously the person most in need of help right now. As I am writing this thread I am writing in great anger. The person God gave me as a father is the person trying to destroy my future on purpose right now. Firstly, he was not there when I was born. I never knew him up-to the age of 9, he is a liar and a cheat. It was when I was 9 when I was about rounding up my primary school was the period I first set my eyes on him. We never had any contact since when I was born till that moment, my mom was the person taking care of my needs since then when we were in Lagos.

After a while when I finally finished my primary school at age 10. He said that we (me and my mom) should relocate to Minna, Niger state where he was living. Then he was still trying to act nice not knowing that he is a wicked person on the inside. He put me in a boarding school in Kaduna, he wasn't even caring about my provisions and pocket money or whether I starve through out my stay in that school from my jss1-jss3.He didn't care whether I renew school uniforms, sandals, and other things. He could watch me wear rags to school. All the clothes I have been wearing since when I was born ,it was my mom that provided them for me. My mom sacrificed her job where she was earning her daily bread all in the name of marriage with this wicked man. Even though my mom wasn't earning much because she was an hairdresser she made sure that I never lacked. Though she was scammed and lost thousands in a contribution bank ,then called Trimm. She still managed to keep her savings for my usage since that 2010.

My mom was didn't have any work doing since we came here yet she try to manage her savings for me. She will travel all the way from Minna to kaduna for my open day. To cut the long story short I struggled through out secondary school and finished ,then graduated in 2016. Since then , I decided to start hustling at the age of 16 due to the nature of father I have because I knew he won't care about furthering my education, even to collect money to barb hair, he would tell you to get out of his sight. So I started earning little money from phone repairs, though I have not fully learnt the phone repairs. I was able to do some little repairs like changing of mouthpiece, earpiece, servicing phone, changing screen of phones. I heard about mmm then I put my little savings in mmm, which I started with 3k. Somehow I was able to add more money in the mmm ponzi and compound my earnings from it until I got to 40k. Till it crashed and hanged my 40k. Then I heard about crypto currency (bitcoin) this is the investment God used to bless, I did some bitcoin ponzi, mlm , hyips and other crypto currency investment and some times I hit big and sometimes I lose money.

Fast-forward to now I can say I was able to earn like 2million at a young age from the investment. Since when my father saw I have earned so much money from crypto currency. Instead of helping me grow my money more, all he was concerned about was to be borrowing the money and he used it to dig well in his house (he collected 30k) from me and that is the only money he has refunded back. As a young boy I was scared of scam and I tried to reduce the way I put money in such investments cos there was a point I started losing so much money then I stopped. So me and my mom concluded that we should start a mini poultry and animal business. So we started, then he came from no where and said that we must be involving him in all the business that we are doing, that we know nothing about the business that we should try and be involving. Not knowing that this man is a bad luck. I wanted to use 50k to buy some animals, we gave him the money , this man went and carried sick animals and bought for us. We were wasting money in feeding, medicine and taking care of the animals. All the animals eventually died. It got to a point were we were tired of the way he was mismanaging my money and always trying to borrow my money, up-to a point that he will always fight my Mom if he want to borrow money and she says know because all my money was in my moms bank account. So she quickly used about 1million naira to buy a plot for me before this devilish man will come and squander all my hard earned money. I was the one that paid for my post ume, my jamb form, and all my school expenses.

I travelled all the way to Kano and Zaria to write my exam, he never gave me money for single pure water. In total if I calculate all the money that he has squandered from me it will sum up-to 300k. I told him one day that he should pay me my money he now said that I should calculate all the money he has used in paying my school fee and feeding. He threaten to call police to go and luck Me up. Am just 17 years of and the foolish man is in his late 50's. He is a retired captain in Nigerian army, he is collecting pension and collecting couple of rent from houses he owns, I don't even know where all the money goes to.

Pls can I get a lawyer to help me sue him to court. My father is a criminal. I am fed up of him and I want to disown him.

Please nairaland admins help me take this topic to front page.

Court of arbitration would be appropriate to get your funds faster than going to a regular court and cost of hiring a lawyer and stuffs.

hmm. open. please take him to God in prayers.

hmm. op. please take him to God in prayers.

You could try a court of arbitration though it might be a long journey.I think you should forget about that money but ensure you don't release money any further to him.
Your father is highly irresponsible,I wonder what your mom is still doing with him.
If not that you're 17yrs and a bit too young,I would have asked you to move out and stay on your own.

Hmmm! A very long and pathetic story, for me oo there is no need of taking him to court just be careful the way you deal with him in terms of finance, thank God for your success it is not your making many people out there have struggled even more than you do but having nothing to account for. Your dad is in his 50's and you are just 17 all that he has now is yours in the nearest future (though you may not understand). My advice is to overlook the bad side of your dad, continue your hustling and God will be blessing the work of your hands. Goodluck

Complicated, I must say.

Don't get over your head, trash this your court idea first. Do not let money control you.

Stop giving him money and start acting broke. Start to ask him for money even if you do not need it. He will not help but just keep doing it to deflect attention.

Be smart and safe.

With all pleasure, you can.

It's well my brother my advise for you is to forget about your unconcerned father also try open a personal account in your own name for financial keepings

I'm really impressed at your zeal to be successful at 17 against all odds, but on a second thought, are you sure your dad doesn't have a family he's responsible to else where?. I just don't see how a man would be this unreasonable and irresponsible to his only child. That being said, don't sue him. See the debt he owes you as a bad debt but keep further business plans and investments from him. Don't let his wicked acts drive you into doing something you may regret.

Prec1ous:
Complicated, I must say.

Don't get over your head, trash this your court idea first. Do not let money control you.

Stop giving him money and start acting broke. Start to ask him for money even if you do not need it. He will not help but just keep doing it to deflect attention.

Be smart and safe.

Wise advise ^. Be on low key and be by yourself till you leave the house.

300k isn't worth going to court for.
It will destroy your family especially your mother, which I'm sure you won't like.

You're young and vibrant look forward and forget the past.

@OP

You've a perfidious man as a father. Well, the best way to treat a perfidious relation/associate/partner is by distancing yourself from him (you don't have to alienate him thou since he's your father). Just forget the money he owed you, assume responsibility of the entrepreneur role you played while your business association with him lasted ( an entrepreneur bears the last risk in any business), this is just a simple diplomacy. . . . Allowing him to go scot-free with his shenanigans won't mean that you're a feeble-minded person, instead it'll show that you're a more wiser and godly person than him. There's nothing weak about a man that lose honorably.

Wonderful! What a man you have as a father.


Biko don't let him kill you before your time. If you can talk you mom into moving back to where you were before he came onboard so you two can mind your business without interference from him will be great. No need to fight him, no need to sue him, just move out of his life. It will be well.

OP, props to you for making money at such a young age! Keep it up! As for your Dad, since he clearly doesn't mean well for you, 1) don't involve him in your business anymore and 2) protect your money: don't give him any access to it and don't give him any more. If you continue to give him money, he's going to continue asking you and making you feel like you're obligated to be giving him more when you're not. He doesn't have the right to be demanding money from you either. You're 17, he should be the one giving you money. Forget about the 300k you've given him, but don't give him any more. If you can move far away from him and continue your business, please do so.

Benita27:
I'm really impressed at your zeal to be successful at 17 against all odds, but on a second thought, are you sure your dad doesn't have a family he's responsible to else where?. I just don't see how a man would be this unreasonable and irresponsible to his only child. That being said, don't sue him. See the debt he owes you as a bad debt but keep further business plans and investments from him. Don't let his wicked acts drive you into doing something you may regret.

He has a family and he took my mom as second wife. I just had to skip that part because it was irrelevant to what I am seeking. He has a wife in kaduna. The worse he does for his children is to push all his children to NDA(Nigerian Defense Academy) after they finish secondary school so that he will not pay school fees again after secondary school. 2 of his son's that senior me are in NDA. The worse thing is that he is even trying to use my money to train my stepbrothers. Can you imagine, one them was going back to school, he called me that I should give him 10k because they have not yet paid NDA cadets salary. He called me that I should give him money to buy provision to go back to school

erenax:


He has a family and he took my mom as second wife. I just had to skip that part because it was irrelevant to what I am seeking. He has a wife in kaduna. The worse he does for his children is to push all his children to NDA(Nigerian Defense Academy) after they finish secondary school so that he will not pay school fees again after secondary school. 2 of his son's that senior me are in NDA. The worse thing is that he is even trying to use my money to train my stepbrothers. Can you imagine, one them was going back to school, he called me that I should give him 10k because they have not yet paid NDA cadets salary. He called me that I should give him money to buy provision to go back to school

It's high time you opened an account for yourself, and start handling your finances.
You can fix your money in a bank or buy federal govt bonds or something. Try and keep saving any little money you make, you will need more especially if you're going to the university.
Stop giving your dad money, and just tell him you've spent all your money. Infact, start requesting pocket money from him monthly, even if he says he doesnt have. Still request from him.

OP, take heart, don't sue him instead stop giving him money. Learn from your mistake

erenax:


He has a family and he took my mom as second wife. I just had to skip that part because it was irrelevant to what I am seeking. He has a wife in kaduna. The worse he does for his children is to push all his children to NDA(Nigerian Defense Academy) after they finish secondary school so that he will not pay school fees again after secondary school. 2 of his son's that senior me are in NDA. The worse thing is that he is even trying to use my money to train my stepbrothers. Can you imagine, one them was going back to school, he called me that I should give him 10k because they have not yet paid NDA cadets salary. He called me that I should give him money to buy provision to go back to school

Is there no way your mum can divorce him? So that you all can have peace of mind. He's a parasite feeding off your money. Anyway, I salute you bro

Him being a retired military man makes this all worse.

Count your lost and move away from there. Take mama with you if possible - that is if your father has another family. Leave the area your father is in.
You do have the zeal to make it but you don't need any drawbacks.

thorpido:
You could try a court of arbitration though it might be a long journey.I think you should forget about that money but ensure you don't release money any further to him.
Your father is highly irresponsible,I wonder what your mom is still doing with him.
If not that you're 17yrs and a bit too young,I would have asked you to move out and stay on your own.

Mate he is not too young. My father would have in the same way as he ruined my life before I took charge.

My was even worst. I don't have a house of my own till now because of that man and my so called mother. If only I had taken charge when I should have I won't be here now.

I personally won't don't advise the op to go to court. Just for posterity's sake. But cut loose that man. I ended up suffering depression ( which miraculously left after my marriage and the birth of my daughter) now I have to deal with insomnia, all because I didn't take action earlier.

He will try to blackmail you with religion. It is a lie. The bible and I believe as well as the quran, is clear on the duty of the parents to the child and the child to the parents. They have defaulted and although you shouldn't default because they did but by cutting him loose, you will be saving a generation. I wish I can tell my story here but some people will instantly know who has this moniker if I did. You will be shocked.

Move away from him, there must be a friend of yours who is well behaved and well mannered who you can move to temporarily.

It is for your own future. When I was reading your story I initially thought it was my driver as he has very similar story especially as he was also scammed into moving to Kaduna as well, the man has his masters now but for health reasons he can only work as a part time driver with me because of an irresponsible father who turned himself to GOD.

Op, act now. Forfeit that money but also move far away from him. Cut total contact with him.

erenax:


He has a family and he took my mom as second wife. I just had to skip that part because it was irrelevant to what I am seeking. He has a wife in kaduna. The worse he does for his children is to push all his children to NDA(Nigerian Defense Academy) after they finish secondary school so that he will not pay school fees again after secondary school. 2 of his son's that senior me are in NDA. The worse thing is that he is even trying to use my money to train my stepbrothers. Can you imagine, one them was going back to school, he called me that I should give him 10k because they have not yet paid NDA cadets salary. He called me that I should give him money to buy provision to go back to school

Sorry this your story is making me think you are my driver's younger brother. Are you yoruba? From Oyo state? Do you have a brother call Femi? Or maybe step brother?

Is your father a retired military man who used to be a white garment church goer?

It's so unfortunate that you are going through this, God would fortify you guys.

If staying with your father doesn't add any value to the life of you and your mother, then you guys should quit, you guys should leave him, he is a pest.

The court idea is wrong, unfortunately I would say you don't have a case, it's a family thing which am sure you don't have documents, receipts for every transactions you guys did, it is your word against his which most times I'd not admissible in court.

The power of connections is another factor, he is a retired soldier, lived in minna more than you guys and most probably would have connect more than you guys. It would be a wasteful venture, besides court processes, lawyers etc are expensive.

Ask yourself,

are you going to sue someone you are staying with in the same house? After the sueing, would you be coming back to the same house? Do you know there would be consequences for your actions for both you and your mother when that happens?

Do you know as a young man at 17 you don't need those drama, the only revenge in your mind should be doing well in you academic pursuits and been a responsible fellow after school.

N/B: be informed that if after exhausting all your options and you can't secure admission in Zaria, I can help you without charge to secure admission in Federal Polytechnic Bida.

Thats all I can do for you so that you spend your time in something that's worth it

Your problems began the day your mother agreed to be a second wife to an irresponsible soldier.

It is so unfortunate, but that's not the end of the world.

I'm not surprised at the rate at which you lose money though. Money accrued from ponzis and gambling don't always last. If you have some leftovers, I would advise you put it in a savings account to fund your education.

like father like son. you have his blood. we have heard from him, now let me hear from you

abescom:
Sorry this your story is making me think you are my driver's younger brother. Are you yoruba? From Oyo state? Do you have a brother call Femi? Or maybe step brother?

Is your father a retired military man who used to be a white garment church goer?

Haha