Pls, I need help. I applied for visa, paid the fee and was about to book an appointment, there was no network, so a friend helped out in her location cuz she already has her own visa and cuz she already has an idea of how to do it. When filling the name, she mistakenly entered her own name instead of mine. Wen I received the email for the date of the interview, I discovered that it was her name that was there, I called and asked her hw manage, then she screamed and said she didn't know o. Ok o, we tried to change it all to no avail. I went for the interview but was told at the gate by those checkers that the name doesn't correspond that I have to change it. I tried tire I even emailed the embassy on several occasions, at the end I was told that it cant be transferred from one applicant to another. Hmmmn! I filled another form, paid another fee; but when I was about to book an appointment I was told that my details is in theit database. Pls, hw can the former one be cancelled so that I can proceed with this new one. Tanx.

peacefull:

Thank you for worry about my safe.
I never been to Nigeria. So I can't imagine how much danger in Nigeria? My husband said danger for Japanese. But I thought his excuse to don't wanna take me to Nigeria @ that time.

I Don't Understand, How Old Are Both Of You? ( Your Ages)

peacefull:


Thank you for adviced me.
I'm from Japan.

I tried to tell him about my feel.
How much hard to pay and How much feel like lonely.

But he dont care.
Maybe bcoz of I was so much mad woman to him?

You have to have a one-on-one conversation with him.

Ask him if he's tired of the marriage or he has some secret wife or something.
You two cannot continue like this. It ain't proper. Call him or talk with him via Skype and ask him why his strange behavior.

But before you do all that,search your heart and see whether you've wronged him badly b4 or whether it was your behavior that made him leave. If so then you have to change your character in order to save your marriage.


Best of luck

peacefull:


Thank you for worry about my safe.

I never been to Nigeria.
So I can't imagine how much danger in Nigeria?
My husband said danger for Japanese.
But I thought his excuse to don't wanna take me to Nigeria @ that time.

Don't worry, Nigeria is safe!
Just make sure you move around with a hired car and a hired driver. Don't even try to walk alone or use public transport.

Apart from that,you'd be safe

Funkybabee:




Is not acceptable for we christians to marry two woman even here in Nigeria but the thing is they won't count your marriage because those people are liars,his parents may not even know about it,talkless of his pastor...will he tell them on hand that he is married before they join his new wife ni and self he may have married before he came to ur country....you guys should be vigilant whenever you want to marry another country man especially Nigerian...






cc lalasticala seun Mynd44 can
U might help her push it to fp for more advice pls

Sorry for late reply.

If his family already know about he married with me, they still don't care about he has 2wives?
Bcoz of they don't wanna accept me and they want him to get another wife?

Is too much difficult to understand it.
Is that culture?
Polygamy is criminal in Japan.
Also fake marriage is criminal too.

So they accept for criminal who is their member of family will do or doing?

I really wanna know what are they thinking about that.

Martmec:
Pls, I need help. I applied for visa, paid the fee and was about to book an appointment, there was no network, so a friend helped out in her location cuz she already has her own visa and cuz she already has an idea of how to do it. When filling the name, she mistakenly entered her own name instead of mine. Wen I received the email for the date of the interview, I discovered that it was her name that was there, I called and asked her hw manage, then she screamed and said she didn't know o. Ok o, we tried to change it all to no avail. I went for the interview but was told at the gate by those checkers that the name doesn't correspond that I have to change it. I tried tire I even emailed the embassy on several occasions, at the end I was told that it cant be transferred from one applicant to another. Hmmmn! I filled another form, paid another fee; but when I was about to book an appointment I was told that my details is in theit database. Pls, hw can the former one be cancelled so that I can proceed with this new one. Tanx.

I'm sorry.
I can't understand what you wrote it.

What kind of visa and which country are you talking about?
Maybe I can't held you.

Sorry.

Fabuloski:

I Don't Understand, How Old Are Both Of You? ( Your Ages)

I'm 38y/o and he is 40y/o.
Sorry!
Like dad talking to kids right?

He told me about thief who has a gun think about white peoples have money.(I'm not white.yellow.)

That's why he said "danger".

But in fact, that is his excuse for don't wanna take me to his country

peacefull:


I'm 38y/o and he is 40y/o.
Sorry!
Like dad talking to kids right?

He told me about thief who has a gun think about white peoples have money.(I'm not white.yellow.)

That's why he said "danger".

But in fact, that is his excuse for don't wanna take me to his country

Well, He Is Right To Some Extent Since He Is Igbo. But Very Rare In The City Areas. To Be Honest With You, I Really Don't Know Why You Want To Save A Sinked Ship. Divorce And Move On. Unless Of Course, If You Think You Being Divorcee Might Affect You In The Future Due To Your Culture, If There Is Any Like That.

TheManOfTheYear:
You have to have a one-on-one conversation with him.

Ask him if he's tired of the marriage or he has some secret wife or something.
You two cannot continue like this. It ain't proper. Call him or talk with him via Skype and ask him why his strange behavior.

But before you do all that,search your heart and see whether you've wronged him badly b4 or whether it was your behavior that made him leave. If so then you have to change your character in order to save your marriage.


Best of luck

Thank you for advised me.

I know what is my wrong to him.
But maybe not all.

Something I stopped doing like b/4.
Bcoz I'm reflective what I did it for him.
But if I tell him what I don't like his doing, he don't care.
He always say my talk is mean less for him and he say "whatever I wanna do, I will do it I can do it I must do it!"
....
Something I already give up about him.
Sometimes he try to change what I want him to change.
But he can't continue.
Sometimes 1week, sometimes 1month,he continue to try to change.
But after 1week or 1month,he just forgot.

I think we don't have kind of stress for each other now.
Coz we don't living together.
We don't see what don't like what don't want fo r each other.
We are getting old.
I always don't know what he is doing behind me.
He also don't know.

That's why I think trust is important for each other.
Loose trust is easy. just a moment can loose it.
But once loose it, get back is so difficult.
Take need long long times.
That's why have to be honest for each other.
W/o trust is can't get good relationship for b/w husband and wife.
That only my thinking.
If can't trust partner, can't get trust from partner, its so painful.

Anyway,I will still try to find out what is my bad for him.

TheManOfTheYear:
Don't worry, Nigeria is safe!
Just make sure you move around with a hired car and a hired driver. Don't even try to walk alone or use public transport.

Apart from that,you'd be safe

Thank you for gave me information about Nigeria.

If use kind of car, can keep safe?
But if don't use kind of car, what happen will get?

Fabuloski:

Well, He Is Right To Some Extent Since He Is Igbo. But Very Rare In The City Areas. To Be Honest With You, I Really Don't Know Why You Want To Save A Sinked Ship. Divorce And Move On. Unless Of Course, If You Think You Being Divorcee Might Affect You In The Future Due To Your Culture, If There Is Any Like That.

Sometimes I also wonder about why I still like to stay with him.
If my family or my friends tell me about their partner kind of treat them, I'm gonna say divorce him/her.

But any problem have both of story(?).
I'm sorry, I can't explain well.
I wanna say can't find out problem when hear from one side.

I mean what he treat me like now, he has reason.
Maybe he don't love me.
Maybe he is fed up our marriage.
Maybe he has real wife.

I still don't know what is reason.
What is truth.
And I still wanna try to understand him.
Bcoz I'm still love him.

But maybe if I will not love him, I still not divorce with him.
Bcoz he has permanent visa in Japan.
And I'm his guarantor.
He got permanent visa is bcoz of he married with me.I have to take responsibility what he got it in my country.

I'm not sure.
Maybe...
But I already told him that if he will do criminal and arresting, I will divorce him that day.
Bcoz I don't want my child to be criminal person' s kid.
I never ever don't wanna break my child's future.

peacefull:



Sorry for late reply.

If his family already know about he married with me, they still don't care about he has 2wives?
Bcoz of they don't wanna accept me and they want him to get another wife?

Is too much difficult to understand it.
Is that culture?
Polygamy is criminal in Japan.
Also fake marriage is criminal too.

So they accept for criminal who is their member of family will do or doing?

I really wanna know what are they thinking about that.

That's their culture they will want him to marry their own tribe and they won't even care about u since u haven't born a child for him.... My advice for u is to forget about him sister, begin to leave a new life though u can sit him down and talk to him about those issue that u didn't understand his behavior anymore that if he can't do his responsibility again maybe he should quit and u divorce so that u can have some benefits from gorvernment as a single mom..wait and see his reaction,if u didn't see any change or take u to his parents try and divorce him


My own opinion thou....
Happy new year

Thank you for read and wrote for me.

APPRECIATE!

New Year coming to Japan 5minutes after!

I just wanna say Have a great New Year for everybody!

I wish to you all have great great New year with especially person from Japan.

HAPPY New Year!!

Funkybabee:





That's their culture they will want him to marry their own tribe and they won't even care about u since u haven't born a child for him.... My advice for u is to forget about him sister, begin to leave a new life though u can sit him down and talk to him about those issue that u didn't understand his behavior anymore that if he can't do his responsibility again maybe he should quit and u divorce so that u can have some benefits from gorvernment as a single mom..wait and see his reaction,if u didn't see any change or take u to his parents try and divorce him


My own opinion thou....
Happy new year

Happy new year!

Thank you for advised me.
Bcoz of baby...
I lost a his baby long time ago.
Pls do not ask me about details.
I never ever forget about that day.
Once I remind that day, my feel like...
I have no words to explain about that my pain
Sorry I can't explain very well.

Maybe that's why I can't leave him.
Bcoz I'm still very sorry for my baby.
I think I have to stay with him bcoz of my baby.
And responsibility for his permanent visa.

Anyway,government support for single mom have deadline.
That is until when kids will be 18y/o.
So I can't get it anymore.
Bcoz my child is almost 20y/o.
(I'm sorry about I can't say daughter or son. Coz if my husband will this my topic, he will know who am I. I wrote in here is not lie.he can find out me.)

peacefull:


Thank you for gave me information about Nigeria.

If use kind of car, can keep safe?
But if don't use kind of car, what happen will get?

Actually nothing will automatically happen if you don't use a private car, but since you're a white (Asian) person,you would attract attention in the midst of blacks. Including unwanted attention. Which could lead to you being robbed or even assaulted.

So it's safer using a hired car.

peacefull:


I'm 38y/o and he is 40y/o.
Sorry!
Like dad talking to kids right?

He told me about thief who has a gun think about white peoples have money.(I'm not white.yellow.)

That's why he said "danger".

But in fact, that is his excuse for don't wanna take me to his country

Indeed it's just an excuse. Even though the crime rate here is high, we still have lots of whites and Asians living in Nigeria but they usually stay in the high-end neighborhoods where security and basic amenities are guaranteed

Funkybabee:





That's their culture they will want him to marry their own tribe and they won't even care about u since u haven't born a child for him.... My advice for u is to forget about him sister, begin to leave a new life though u can sit him down and talk to him about those issue that u didn't understand his behavior anymore that if he can't do his responsibility again maybe he should quit and u divorce so that u can have some benefits from gorvernment as a single mom..wait and see his reaction,if u didn't see any change or take u to his parents try and divorce him


My own opinion thou....
Happy new year

Don't just jump into conclusions advising her to divorce him.
Remember she hasn't found out the truth yet.


We can't say for sure that he has a wife in Nigeria. Don't be quick to break marital bond

peacefull:


I'm sorry.
I can't understand what you wrote it.

What kind of visa and which country are you talking about?
Maybe I can't held you.

Sorry.

Its u.s non immigrant visa. USA

Manoftheyear na your post carry me come here o, shey you de see our men ?
the man just de busy de paint bad name for us down there.

@peacefull i hate to say this but that your husband is an ingret i mean no sane man will treat his wife the way he's treating you!
and please calling your self stupid is Wrong.
you are those kind of women that Ungreatful men take advantage of just because you dont act violent or react, which even if you react he knows you will still come back and beg him
the issue of he never for once introduce you to his people or family is a sign that he is a FRAUD!
Real nigerian men dont behave lile that, meaning who wont take care of his wife when she is sick ? i think its time you move on with your Life.
:
kindly leave him with the Law of Karma it will hunt him back!!!

You can google for the meaning of words i use which you dont understand.

Have a Nice Day

Error4040, wasn't referring to the case u r talking about. Ds is a different one altogether. Pls, be sure in case of nxt time

peaceful(f). Its a u.s non immigrant visa pls

Martmec:
Error4040, wasn't referring to the case u r talking about. Ds is a different one altogether. Pls, be sure in case of nxt time

Some people sef!!!
Oga what i was trying to say is, she has her own issue and you're asking her of Info on US visa when she is not in US. or did you think each country use the same reg process or visa Law ?

you already asked here

www.nairaland.com/4116999/usa-visit-visa-part-3/74
with people in america and someone replied you this


Go to the previous appointment and remove your
passport number. Edit it and insert any passport
number because the system recognize your
passport number has been used in another profile.
Afterward create your own profile with your
passport number.


then why ask someone in Asia with case related to US embassy ?

error4040:
Some people sef!!!
Oga what i was trying to say is, she has her own issue and you're asking her of Info on US visa when she is not in US. or did you think each country use the same reg process or visa Law ?

you already asked here

www.nairaland.com/4116999/usa-visit-visa-part-3/74
with people in america and someone replied you this


Go to the previous appointment and remove your
passport number. Edit it and insert any passport
number because the system recognize your
passport number has been used in another profile.
Afterward create your own profile with your
passport number.


then why ask someone in Asia with case related to US embassy ?

Asia kwa, lol, never knew

peacefull:
To:Nutase
Thank you for advice me.
I already had lots of shock about him.
But I'm still love him.
I really hope continue our marriage life and get more good marriage life till when we die.

To:Badgers14
Thank you for advice me.
Yes.
I know that Everybody different.
I'm Asian and I never been to any other country.
Women can't say anything to men in Africa?
If women say something to men,is that rude?

I always thankful to him in my mind.
Even I say thank you to him when he helped me whatever he did.

I already have a child b/4 marry with him.
And he took care of us only his salary when I lost work bcoz of my sick.

But my life was no change what I work or not work.

We started marriage life in my house.
He just brought his bag.

So I wanted him to understand that what is make family.
Bcoz I dont understand what somebody can't take care of wife and kids but want marry and make baby.
And doing wanna acting wanna like single guy.

Kind of guy suppose to be not get marriage.
That is my thinking and I told him lots of times.

So,I didn't try to get work more than 5years after my sick is gone.
I think very sorry and thankful to him in my mind.
But I thought that is little bit revenge to him @ that time.
I was so stupid.

And I was so mad when we had quarrel.
Many many many times.
I was really mad wife.

More than 10years is not short time to me.
We had so many good times and bad times.

But i'm thankful about he is also trying to keep our marriage whatever he love me or not.

I wanna write more.
But I dont want he'll find out me in here.

Thanks.

you must be a filipino

Let's help you do underground work on him.. email his full name and pictures to pinlienwang@gmail.com

TheManOfTheYear:
Indeed it's just an excuse. Even though the crime rate here is high, we still have lots of whites and Asians living in Nigeria but they usually stay in the high-end neighborhoods where security and basic amenities are guaranteed

TheManOfTheYear:
Actually nothing will automatically happen if you don't use a private car, but since you're a white (Asian) person,you would attract attention in the midst of blacks. Including unwanted attention. Which could lead to you being robbed or even assaulted.

So it's safer using a hired car.

Happy New Year!

Thank you for information again.
I hope I can go to Nigeria someday!!
I watched TV(CNN.JP) with my husband when they pick up Lagos.
I saw very good hotel and restaurant.
Then I said I like to go there when I can go to Nigeria.
But he said there is just for rich peoples.
Even I said I like to go to market when I saw it on TV.
Doesn't matter if I can buy something or not.
I like to walk around.
He told me that there have many many shops.
Even if I check Nigeria on website,I see some market pictures.
I really wanna go!

Anyway,
My husband say he stay in his senior brother's house who is married and have kids when he back to Nigeria.
But there is also his junior sister and junior brother are living what he told me.
And he said there have not enough rooms when he go there.
So he told me he is sleeping in junior sister and brother's room.
But b/4 he told me that somebody who is married person suppose to be can stay alone 1room.
Then he was stay alone 1room when they were not around about 2or3 years ago what he told me.

But he told me about last time.
There have also his sister in law's sister were stay.
And all of them sleeping inside 1room.
I asked him how?
He said he and junior brother were on the be and junior sister and sister in law's sister were on the floor.
I was very surprise it.

Is it common in Nigeria?
What I can't understand is sister in law's sister also sleeping @ same room.
I don't like it.
I had something like jealousy when I heard that.

If that is nothing strange in Nigeria,I can understand why he was feel so bad when I told him I don't like it.
But I'm not Nigerian.
We have different culture.
I wanted him to understand why I said that.
But he said "you never ever understand it".

Is it common?

Martmec:

Its u.s non immigrant visa. USA

Martmec:
peaceful(f). Its a u.s non immigrant visa pls

Happy New Year!

Sorry, I'm Japanese.
I don't know about USA visa.
Sorry about I can't help you.

Seun:

Bad idea. We can’t guarantee her safety if she does this.

Exactly what came to my mind. Mr. Seun, is there anything that can be done to help this lady. At least if she knows the truth, she would be able to make a better and informed decision. I really feel her pain and she seems like a good person.

peacefull:


Happy New Year!

Sorry, I'm Japanese.
I don't know about USA visa.
Sorry about I can't help you.

Please, what do you really want?
Most of the things your husband is doing has nothing to do with Nigerian culture.
So understanding Nigerian culture will not make him change.

error4040:


Manoftheyear na your post carry me come here o, shey you de see our men ?
the man just de busy de paint bad name for us down there.

@peacefull i hate to say this but that your husband is an ingret i mean no sane man will treat his wife the way he's treating you!
and please calling your self stupid is Wrong.
you are those kind of women that Ungreatful men take advantage of just because you dont act violent or react, which even if you react he knows you will still come back and beg him
the issue of he never for once introduce you to his people or family is a sign that he is a FRAUD!
Real nigerian men dont behave lile that, meaning who wont take care of his wife when she is sick ? i think its time you move on with your Life.
:
kindly leave him with the Law of Karma it will hunt him back!!!

You can google for the meaning of words i use which you dont understand.

Have a Nice Day

Happy New Year!

Thank you for advised me!

If he is a liar, he is very professional liar.
Coz I'm still trying to trust him.
I really wanna know about his truth.
Not fake.

Of course I know everybody are different.
No one is same human.
That is I told him lots of times.
That's why I think both of them have to try to understand for each other.
But sometimes so difficult to understand.

Divorce is still difficult to me now.
But I have to think about that.
If I can hate him so much,that is so easy.

I know that I'm making irritating to many peoples.
Sorry.

Arijude:
you must be a filipino

Happy New Year!

Excuse me?
Filipino?
Am I Filipino?

I AM JAPANESE.

Collins4u1:
Let's help you do underground work on him.. email his full name and pictures to pinlienwang@gmail.com

Happy New Year!

Thank you for caring me.
I can send you a mail as like your friend.
But I can't send you his name and pictures.
Coz if he will know that , I can imagine how he will feel so bad and he will say stupid to me.

But I'm so glad to what you try to help me.
I am very very thank you.

In fact, I also imagine that if somebody(Nigerian) ask him and tell him something our relationship,I think I can get his truth and I can more understand him.