Some days ago, I stood in a room full of young men I had been invited to speak to…It was a beautiful meeting. At some point I asked the question, “how many of you here believe that your father says nonsense sometimes?”

Guess what? All hands in the room went up! Some said it’s not just sometimes, its like most times. I was not surprised…

I have felt that way before, my father would say things that are true, but not relevant to my current realities, but because he is “father” I have to hear him out, only because he would not listen to any other information.
This is the experience of most adolescents male and female alike.

A young man told of how his father had made him go to one of the renowned Bible schools to take a sort of pastoral class for three months, because he was too idle at home during a school break. He didn’t want to and had no desire for such, 22 he was at the time., but his father wouldn’t have it.

He went to the bible school, excelled at it, his father was proud of him because he had done what he wanted and also had the best result in the bible school year, he smiled for the cameras, got the award recognition, he took a selfie… however, three years before then, he had stopped believing in the existence of God.

How come his father did not know his son had stopped believing? He did what he was bullied to do…yeah, I said it…bullied! Another boy in a previous post said, as long as he attended church service meetings, rehearsals, sang in the choir, his parents believe they are teaching him ‘the way of the Lord’. The proverb that is hurled at me when talking to a parent about their kids is “train up a child in the way he should go and when he’s old he won’t depart from it”, most forget that in order to train someone, first you have to find out what he knows, what he has been taught, and how to help him unlearn what is irrelevant.

Parents don’t listen to their kids anymore, they don’t have conversations that would help them understand the psyche of the child. I always say to parents ‘stop thinking you know more than your children, they know more than you, the advantage you have is wisdom of age, but you don’t ever know more than them’. An average 16 year old probably knows more than his parents ever dreamed when he was in his 30s. When you speak with them, you will know.

You probably have been in those shoes where you wondered why your parents spoke gibberish, it’s not because it was nonsense, it just wasn’t relevant to your then current realities, real or unreal

When you seek to change your child’s behaviour, do not change his actions through beatings and abusive words, it never works.

You cannot change the actions of your children, if you do not change their minds, and you cannot change their minds, if you don’t know what is contained in there.
The only way to know what is in their minds… talk to them and make sure they can discuss with you any area of their lives without being judged, or their information used against them in disagreements, or hot moments.

Trust is a key element for any relationship to be established, and remember, just because you’re the parent doesn’t mean your children have to trust you…trust is “earned” and built through effective and consistent communication, until then…everything you say will be like nonsense, even if you’re breathing fire from the throne of the gods.

Earn the trust by all means…please.

Source: http://blog.menstable.org/my-father-talks-nonsense/

Ok

spot on

Some parents are insecure and afraid. I think that's the reason most parents still think primitively

Athests creeping outta their crevices. why only religious instances? Always looking for an avenue to attack the church.

LadySarah:
Athests creeping outta their crevices.
why only religious instances?
Always looking for an avenue to attack the church.

Please read the article closely again without any bias and you will understand better.