Hello all, hope your all having a great Sunday evening

I want to be utmost honest, this is my story

I'm from a family of 5, 3 boys and 2 girls, I am the eldest of them all, in my mid 20s, my father is a retired primary school teacher, since when I was young, my dad always told me I must be better than him, perhaps, that is why he has invested so much in our education.

I graduated from my secondary school in 2009, took JAMB 3 times, I always pass with 220+ in all 3, but hasn't always been shortlisted, tired of staying at home, I applied for a State Polytechnic in 2011 and was admitted, tho my dad wasn't in support, but he had no choice too than to sponsor me.

In 2013 I was done with Poly, I tried direct entry and wasn't successful, so in 2013, my dad said I should take JAMB again, by now my immediate younger sibling has graduated from Sec sch too and we took the 2013 JAMB together, still I wasn't successful, but she was, she was Admitted into the Federal Uni have been applying for since 2009, so I was advised by a family friend to get a Pre Degree form which I told dad and he agreed.

I started predegree in 2013, in 2014 I finished and was successfully Admitted into the Uni, it was a dream come true for me, I promised myself that since am coming from a just below poor background, I must graduate with First Class so as to be retained and Sponsored for Post Bsc by the school.

In my first year, I was the best in my department with 4.24 CGPA, I was really happy cos it wasn't that bad and I was only aiming for a better result next session.

Meanwhile while me and my immediate sister were taking my year 1 and her year 2 second semester exams, my dad and my other 3 younger siblings travelled back to our village for farm work which me, my mom and my immediate younger sibling were to join after our (me & my immediate sibling) exams. I finished earlier than my sibling so since she still had like 2weeks to tidy up, dad said me and my mom should come back to the village to help in farm work that in that 2 weeks we should be done.

On our (me and mom) way to the village, we had a very ghastly accident which very few survived including me but I was seriously hurt, including serious blows on the head which needed stitching, unfortunately mom didn't survive.

So the new session started and everything was going well till this particular night, I was reading then I had a seizure, or should I say epilepsy, I didn't take it that serious then it happened again, then the third time, which I was in a friend's house and wen I was conscious he narrated it to me and advised me to tell dad. I told dad, we met a neurologist who hinted that it might have been as a result of the accident, and that it epilepsy doesn't have a cure, I was then put on drugs, which I still take till now.

Since the doctor said it might be chronic, I haven't really been myself, in my second year in school, I had fears of going out, thinking it might happen on the road, in class or anywhere, so after my second session in school, my CGPA instead of going up dropped from 4.24 to 2.00, I challenged myself to do better but it wasn't meant to be, my GP kept going down in my year 3 too.

I kept having seizures in my year3, especially if I keep late night reading, so I hardly really read again, cos of the fear of it happening, meanwhile, I couldn't tell my dad its still happening, cos I knew he will react badly and might even have hypertension (I know how he react to things like this) and if anything happens to him, me and my siblings are doomed.

Last year my immediate sibling graduated with first class, meanwhile me, this is my final year, and since my CGPA was disastrous and almost no hope of graduating even with second class lower I was considering taking JAMB again, but I couldn't tell dad, since I know he will never listen to me and might even react badly, and my next younger sibling had just been admitted and my last 2 siblings are still in sec sch which dad must pay too, I am a kind of quiet personality and I don't really have a friend I can even really tell this kind of story to to get good advice and for it to be safe with him or her

Looking for money to at least register JAMB and maybe after have been admitted I tell dad the whole story I started doing things have never dreamt of, just this month have learnt to play bet9ja, which have wasted close to 2k without success.

Earlier this month this particular guy asked me to take a test for him, in a maths course, he promised to pay 10k after the test, I have been avoiding this kind of thing in the past, but since I needed the money so urgently to get a JAMB form I accepted, I was caught in the exam hall and handed over to the school security, I faced the school senate and it was adjourned till next month, at least those of us in school knows the consequence of impersonating in exam hall, Rustication!!!

This is my story guys, it has been killing me for the past months, lately I hardly even go out, am just very confused, I don't know if I should say I need advice from you guys or what, am very very confused, this wasn't how I planned my life to be, I can't tell dad all this, I know why am saying it, I know him for 20yrs+ now. Help me guys.

Please NL Bosses, help me push to front page

It might be better to let your dad know now, so that plans on how to give you a new beginning can begin in earnest, because he'll still get to know of everything sooner or later.

It may sound like a joke buh U need JESUS, Give Ur Life To Him, Surrender all To Him nd Let Him Guide Ur Every Step, With Him U Will Find Fulfilment In Whatever U Do ! You Can Start By Visiting A Spiritual Counselor Close To U.
Might Not Be What U R Expecting Buh Its The Best Answer To Ur Situation !