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Am I Married To Him? - Family (2) - Nairaland

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I Married Her A Virgin But Now This Is Happening / I Married My Daughter, Fathered Two Kids With Her, While My Dad Married Her Mum / I Married Into The Wrong Family.. (true Story) (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Am I Married To Him? by pennywys(m): 9:52pm On Feb 06, 2018
Futurewice11:


You are legally married and thats what count.

Church or not, intro or not, you are bound to comply with the LAW because u are issued a certificate already and your details has been updated as married.

The only thing that count by law is wedding certificate and thats all...church or intro is irrelevant.

So sfter ur studies u want to duml him abi....no way.
go back and read the post

The marriage certificate was not signed by unauthorized person

2 Likes

Re: Am I Married To Him? by talk2hb1(m): 9:52pm On Feb 06, 2018
The good things of life are free but they aren't cheap
Re: Am I Married To Him? by XX01(f): 9:54pm On Feb 06, 2018
amprat:
We have been together for years now and have 3 beautiful kids between us, the state of the marriage is another day's discussion ,have even tried keeping a diary here on Nairaland but tupdating it is an issue, what I want to clarify at the moment is am not even sure am married to my husband.
1. I have always had issues with dowry and stuff (my personal opinion) so I didn't allow it to be paid hence I didn't invite any extended family member to any wedding, was a bit easy we've not really been close to them as my dad died quite early so wedding was myself,him,my immediate siblings, his own, my mum and his,no serious"introduction",presentation of yam and stuff, I look back now and think what sort of thing that is must have always done things my way.

2. I remember at the court, they had to do mine before statrting , because I had exam on that day( I was an undergraduate) we signed,witnesses signed and we were given the certificate but was told we should bring it back later for an authorized signature from one of their oga or something, I didn't hear, I just didn't want to miss my exam truth is I wasn't serious and didn't realize the enormity of the event(i was barely 21) meaning authorized signature on behalf of government missing

3. Took the ring to a pastor who blessed the ring but we didn't marry in the church, just introduced to the church, right now I really want to know if I am married( in the eyes of the law, man or God,)or I have just been cohabiting with this guy. thanks

Take your certificate back to the registry for ratification. Ask them if your certificate is valid.

1 Like

Re: Am I Married To Him? by Rigel95(m): 9:54pm On Feb 06, 2018
k
Re: Am I Married To Him? by stonecoldcafe: 9:54pm On Feb 06, 2018
lipsrsealed
Re: Am I Married To Him? by Memyselfu2009(m): 9:55pm On Feb 06, 2018
If you done the traditional right you are marriage i think the bible recognized it

1 Like

Re: Am I Married To Him? by Sikiratu: 9:55pm On Feb 06, 2018
Traditionally, your not. Not according to culture anyway.
Under d law (court) your certificate didn't carry government seal according to you. But if I may ask, is your certificate tenable in bamks,??
it is like getting a certificate from ur tertiary institution without having the required signatories
well marriage in Church required more than the blessing of the ring.
Re: Am I Married To Him? by Futurewice11: 9:56pm On Feb 06, 2018
pennywys:
go back and read the post

The marriage certificate was not signed by unauthorized person

Thats a negligence...that does not render the marriage null and void.

Watch divorce court by judge Lynn on youtube....
Re: Am I Married To Him? by BruncleZuma: 9:57pm On Feb 06, 2018
See this married woman ooo

1 Like

Re: Am I Married To Him? by Nobody: 9:57pm On Feb 06, 2018
best thing, however to court with the certificate and complete the signature thingy.. Then you can consider yourself married
Re: Am I Married To Him? by Ennyiyi(f): 10:00pm On Feb 06, 2018
amprat:
please, why do you think I am married to him or not married to him, kindly give reasons to support your answers, thanks.
the most important thing is the consent of your parents and family. Since your mum and siblings are in Support of your union and you also signed marriage contract with him in the presence of witnesses then you are lawfully married to him and also in the eyes of God.

2 Likes

Re: Am I Married To Him? by NairanlandMOD: 10:00pm On Feb 06, 2018
zulex880:
I don't know what I'm 100% sure of is that Buhari is a stupid fellow with no iota of wisdom





Omo DEM TAKR BUhari MATTER CAUSE YOU ?? FREE THAT NIGGY !! NAH. COME 2019 USE YOUR PVC
Re: Am I Married To Him? by Nobody: 10:03pm On Feb 06, 2018
Let him pay the brideprice, and get your marriage certificate, then you are fully married to him.

1 Like

Re: Am I Married To Him? by repent4christ: 10:15pm On Feb 06, 2018
God recognises dowry, if that is not done before death both of you must answer that in the day of judgment.
Re: Am I Married To Him? by repent4christ: 10:18pm On Feb 06, 2018
As a Christian without paying dowry a man is a thief.

1 Like

Re: Am I Married To Him? by Nobody: 10:18pm On Feb 06, 2018
Aunty, I can deduce that you want to take a hike so you're free cos you ain't married. I repeat, you ain't married.
Re: Am I Married To Him? by Xmen149(m): 10:19pm On Feb 06, 2018
spongeisback:
Customary yes. Legally YES. You can take your marriage certificate to the courts and make an amend. Forget all they will say about African culture and what not the most important people (you,your husband and your immediate family) were present that's ALL that matters.

Sort out the legal aspect. Except you're tired of your marriage.

lol,exactly my thought she is tired and looking for excuses......the dowry can be arranged to be paid to her family as well as fix the marriage cert thing ................ she should think about the kids else the marriage is no longer healthy for all of them
Re: Am I Married To Him? by damola1: 10:19pm On Feb 06, 2018
Yinxies:
You know you are not married to him, you just want us to confirm it, that is, if your story is true

How did she know ? Knowledge is learnt. Nobody brought marriage knowledge into this world. Kindly stop making her feel judged cos she asked to clarify

1 Like

Re: Am I Married To Him? by sonofthunder: 10:23pm On Feb 06, 2018
I am lost for words...
Re: Am I Married To Him? by adedayoa2(f): 10:24pm On Feb 06, 2018
edoman2016:
What mockery of marriage did you have? Even if you were 21 years old when you got married, didn't you have elders in your family that will ensure all the right process of marriage was done? After three years of cohabiting, you are now wondering whether you are married to your husband or not. This is the reason why extended family is important in traditional marriage in Africa.
the deeds been done, is she married or not?
Re: Am I Married To Him? by pweetyz(f): 10:24pm On Feb 06, 2018
spongeisback:
Customary yes. Legally YES. You can take your marriage certificate to the courts and make an amend. Forget all they will say about African culture and what not the most important people (you,your husband and your immediate family) were present that's ALL that matters.

Sort out the legal aspect. Except you're tired of your marriage.
Sorry to say this but you are WRONG about the Customary Law aspect.
The DOWRY is so important and cannot be done away with in a Customary Law marriage. She has other elements of a Customary Law marriage present, but with the most important element absent, I must say she is yet to be married traditionally.
You can confirm this by checking it out.
I'd advise she performs a valid Customary Law marriage if she wants to tho, cos Marriage under the Act also has it's advantages and she might thus want to make do with just her Court Marriage.

I don't know much on Court marriages, but I think it wouldn't be too much of a stress if she takes the certificate back to the Court for it to be signed by the appropriate Authority.
Re: Am I Married To Him? by Nobody: 10:27pm On Feb 06, 2018
Firstly, I think Nairaland Is the wrong place to find answers the questions In ur heart

Secondly, I am sure there other things bothering you..understand you cannot change the past,settle that within you get ready to move forward and fix what u need to fix now!. If u are so bothered talk to your husband,if u can't talk to a professional and look for a way to silence your fears and do something

Thirdly, get a family of believers or people that are mature and can give you sound and godly advice





amprat:
We have been together for years now and have 3 beautiful kids between us, the state of the marriage is another day's discussion ,have even tried keeping a diary here on Nairaland but tupdating it is an issue, what I want to clarify at the moment is am not even sure am married to my husband.
1. I have always had issues with dowry and stuff (my personal opinion) so I didn't allow it to be paid hence I didn't invite any extended family member to any wedding, was a bit easy we've not really been close to them as my dad died quite early so wedding was myself,him,my immediate siblings, his own, my mum and his,no serious"introduction",presentation of yam and stuff, I look back now and think what sort of thing that is must have always done things my way.

2. I remember at the court, they had to do mine before statrting , because I had exam on that day( I was an undergraduate) we signed,witnesses signed and we were given the certificate but was told we should bring it back later for an authorized signature from one of their oga or something, I didn't hear, I just didn't want to miss my exam truth is I wasn't serious and didn't realize the enormity of the event(i was barely 21) meaning authorized signature on behalf of government missing

3. Took the ring to a pastor who blessed the ring but we didn't marry in the church, just introduced to the church, right now I really want to know if I am married( in the eyes of the law, man or God,)or I have just been cohabiting with this guy. thanks

1 Like

Re: Am I Married To Him? by Spaxon(f): 10:28pm On Feb 06, 2018
Marriage is not all about all this celebration things...

I think you're confused between wedding and marriage.
As long as all the necessary people have been involved.

Ofcourse by necessary I mean immediate family members.
Signed in court.
Blessed and introduced in the church.,

Dassal

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Re: Am I Married To Him? by ednut1(m): 10:28pm On Feb 06, 2018
I find this thread funny. Take the cert back to the court na. As simple as that. In this recession time i know ur plans. Make ur husby con do elaborate rewedding

1 Like

Re: Am I Married To Him? by Blazed(m): 10:32pm On Feb 06, 2018
amprat:
We have been together for years now and have 3 beautiful kids between us, the state of the marriage is another day's discussion ,have even tried keeping a diary here on Nairaland but tupdating it is an issue, what I want to clarify at the moment is am not even sure am married to my husband.
1. I have always had issues with dowry and stuff (my personal opinion) so I didn't allow it to be paid hence I didn't invite any extended family member to any wedding, was a bit easy we've not really been close to them as my dad died quite early so wedding was myself,him,my immediate siblings, his own, my mum and his,no serious"introduction",presentation of yam and stuff, I look back now and think what sort of thing that is must have always done things my way.

2. I remember at the court, they had to do mine before statrting , because I had exam on that day( I was an undergraduate) we signed,witnesses signed and we were given the certificate but was told we should bring it back later for an authorized signature from one of their oga or something, I didn't hear, I just didn't want to miss my exam truth is I wasn't serious and didn't realize the enormity of the event(i was barely 21) meaning authorized signature on behalf of government missing




To the eyes of the Law; you are married. Reason: In as much as the "oga's signature" isn't present on your certificate, You guys exchanged marital vows in a legal court of law with some witnesses.
Traditionally, No! This is because to the eyes of your kinsmen, you just decided to cohabit with an unknown man since no bride prize was paid and no drinks was introduced.
Be rest assured that only you and your immediate family cannot handle the pressure of marriage crisis if any arises (i'm not wishing you one though). Do the right thing now you are a grown woman, let the tradition prevail not as you wish.
3. Took the ring to a pastor who blessed the ring but we didn't marry in the church, just introduced to the church, right now I really want to know if I am married( in the eyes of the law, man or God,)or I have just been cohabiting with this guy. thanks
Re: Am I Married To Him? by Liftedhands(f): 10:33pm On Feb 06, 2018
wunmi590:
Sister, the truth of the matter is, you had a very wonderful wedding, no better wedding is better than the one you had, that has even produced 3 beautiful kids.

Wearing wedding gown to show of these days is a scam, alot of broken home.

Just enjoy your marriage sis.
She's wasn't referring to the simplicity of the ceremony, the legality is what is at stake here.

@op you neees to get the civil marriage certificate signed by the government authorized signatory! Otherwise what you have is just a mere document with no legal backing thus rendering your supposed marriage naught.


Save yourself and kids the stress of future drama.


Where do you think you will stand should you and your partner separate? Just saying.
Cc amprat.
Re: Am I Married To Him? by Blazed(m): 10:34pm On Feb 06, 2018
To the eyes of the Law; you are married. Reason: In as much as the "oga's signature" isn't present on your certificate, You guys exchanged marital vows in a legal court of law with some witnesses.
Traditionally, No! This is because to the eyes of your kinsmen, you just decided to cohabit with an unknown man since no bride prize was paid and no drinks was introduced.
Be rest assured that only you and your immediate family cannot handle the pressure of marriage crisis if any arises (i'm not wishing you one though). Do the right thing now you are a grown woman, let the tradition prevail not as you wish.
Re: Am I Married To Him? by Ucheamani(m): 10:39pm On Feb 06, 2018
(1) if the registry issued you with a marriage certificate, it means you've signed the marriage register and that means you are married under the law.
(2) Nigeria law defines marriage as a contract between 2 consenting adults in the presence of 2 witnesses.
(3) There is no provision for bride price nor parents in civil marriage.
(4) Majority of those advising and castigating you here know nothing about the civil marriage law.
(5) It is unlikely that a registry will issue you with a marriage certificate not signed by an authorised signatory so if they ask you to come for another "signing" it could be that you did not understand what they meant so its good to revert.
(6) So on the eyes of the law, you are legally married so make it work an keep your home.

1 Like

Re: Am I Married To Him? by oshe11: 10:45pm On Feb 06, 2018
amprat:
We have been together for years now and have 3 beautiful kids between us, the state of the marriage is another day's discussion ,have even tried keeping a diary here on Nairaland but tupdating it is an issue, what I want to clarify at the moment is am not even sure am married to my husband.
1. I have always had issues with dowry and stuff (my personal opinion) so I didn't allow it to be paid hence I didn't invite any extended family member to any wedding, was a bit easy we've not really been close to them as my dad died quite early so wedding was myself,him,my immediate siblings, his own, my mum and his,no serious"introduction",presentation of yam and stuff, I look back now and think what sort of thing that is must have always done things my way.

2. I remember at the court, they had to do mine before statrting , because I had exam on that day( I was an undergraduate) we signed,witnesses signed and we were given the certificate but was told we should bring it back later for an authorized signature from one of their oga or something, I didn't hear, I just didn't want to miss my exam truth is I wasn't serious and didn't realize the enormity of the event(i was barely 21) meaning authorized signature on behalf of government missing

3. Took the ring to a pastor who blessed the ring but we didn't marry in the church, just introduced to the church, right now I really want to know if I am married( in the eyes of the law, man or God,)or I have just been cohabiting with this guy. thanks
Why do u wanna knw NOW, are U cheating on him or thinking of divorcing him

WHY NOW

1 Like

Re: Am I Married To Him? by Awoo88: 10:50pm On Feb 06, 2018
Dowry must be paid to your family people that is your father's people in your father's family house. If that did not take place, if you are an ibo or from South South, Na fake arrangee wedding

1 Like

Re: Am I Married To Him? by Nobody: 10:53pm On Feb 06, 2018
Forget what you said about having issues with dowry. It's not your call to make, if money was the issue then you could've asked your husband to drop a token... traditionally, you're not married. Don't be deceived.

Secondly, you ran off to have a court marriage you weren't ready for and ended up not having the authorised signature on your marriage certificate? By the law, your marriage isn't valid and if anything happens that the documents are required for verification, you'll be fooling yourself if what you have is presented.

You've been co-habiting.

2 Likes

Re: Am I Married To Him? by chigoizie7(m): 10:57pm On Feb 06, 2018
Madam u know the truth. Why asking us?

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