Nigerian reproductive health activist and Associate Professor, College of Health Sciences, Obafemi Awolowo University, Ile-Ife, Morenike Toyin Folayan, has revealed that she divorced because she could not sacrifice her career for her home.

In an interview with TheNation, she also talked about the disadvantages of raising independent children. According to her: “One of the things that probably made me call for a divorce was that I could not sacrifice my career for my home, and I am happy I did not.

Because now that I’m divorced, I’m still going on. I don’t feel any loss and I don’t feel that I’ve wasted my life. In addition, I must acknowledge extensively that my husband stood at the home front for me, spent a lot of time with the kids. He did, and I would always acknowledge that.

However, I think I had trained my children to become very independent. That is one of the things that make me sad sometimes. My kids do not really need me around.

At times, I just wonder if my kids really need me. Actually, the three of them are now in the UK, one of them is married and two are in school. I send them text messages through Whatsapp or Messenger, and two weeks after, they reply.

I really brought up independent children. It has its disadvantages, but it allowed me a lot more in my career. It has its pluses and minuses.”
http://www.pressnewsng.com.ng/2018/02/career-made-me-divorce-now-im-sad-my.html?m=1

I pray that our beautiful young lady won't learn the hard part of life. if the time of marriage is ripe, go for your rib. don't abandon your family or husband to be cos' you are pursuing a career .

You reap as you sow baby

Madam Professor,

When your children are young is the best time to bond with them, teach them things and be involved in their lives, once they get into their teenage years no matter how hard you try to build a relationship, you will be considerd a stranger.

I once had a neighbour who said the only time she talks to her dad is when she needs money.

Before fellas start dancing on this thread, read this

One of the things that probably made me call for a divorce was that I could not sacrifice my career for my home, and I am happy I did not.

Shes not sad about the marriage loss but how independent her children has become and are hardly involving her in their lives. If she was to turn back the hands of time, she will still pick her career but raise her children differently. Marriage must never be a woman's biggest achievement in life.

dominique:
Before fellas start dancing on this thread, read this



Shes not sad about the marriage loss but how independent her children has become and are hardly involving her in their lives. If she was to turn back the hands of time, she will still pick her career but raise her children differently. Marriage must never be a woman's biggest achievement in life.

Men should stop sacrificing for women's career whether wife or girlfriend! Men do that rubbish too much!
Guess what? She's a mere associate professor not even a professor!! She's empty-headed and an illiterate. Not fit for the university.

So she's been fvckin around. Cheated the man and literally been a selfish self loving bi.tch... ijebu will say odigba to otutu baamu ki onitobi tomoo pe aso ko lohun wo

angels09:

Men should stop sacrificing for women's career whether wife or girlfriend! Men do that rubbish too much!

How many men put their lives on hold for their wives' career? If you're talking about the momentary aspect, that's hardly hardly a sacrifice because money can still be replaced but lost time can never be.

At the twilight of her life.... She will seek tears but will not find it.

Don Corleone in the Godfather insists that a real man has and must spend time with his family. You can't be greater than your family. She's simply a failure..... She ought to go and learn from Professor Jumoke Afolayan at geography department faculty of the social sciences a UN consultant... Professor Mrs Garba economics department, Professor ....at IMRAT... Professor Mrs Pogoson political science department, Professor Mrs Adekanye...all erudite scholars and mama psychology all at the University of Ibadan Nigeria. Few universities can be as tasking as UI.

Dominique see profiles of married women scholars:
Bio
Dr. AIrene POGOSON who holds a B.A degree in History (1981) from the University of Ibadan, is a Senior Lecturer in the Department of Political Science, University of Ibadan from where she obtained her masters and doctoral degrees in 1984 and 1994 respectively. She has also attended the John F. Kennedy School of Government at Harvard University and the Friedrich Ebert Foundation, New York, USA, Fall Academy for Young International Policy Analysts in 2008. She is the first female lecturer in the history of the Department of Political Science, University of Ibadan, Ibadan. Before joining the University of Ibadan in 2000, Dr. Pogoson worked with the Presidential Panel on Nigeria Since Independence History Project as Research Fellow and as Administrative Secretary between 1981 and 2000. Between 2005 and 2007 in Abuja, Dr. Pogoson was also a Policy Analyst on Governance with the Independent Policy Group, a UNDP/Soros Foundation
funded Policy Think – Tank for President Olusegun Obasanjo. Dr. Pogoson is a member of a number of learned societies and organizations including the African Association of Political Science (AAPS); Nigerian Political Science Association (NPSA), Nigerian Society of International Affairs (NSIA) and the Initiative for Women’s Studies in Nigeria (IWSN), among others. Since 2009, she has been on the Advisory Council of the Ibrahim Index of African Governance (IIAG) of the MO Ibrahim Foundation. She consults for a number of national and international agencies including Women Advocates’ Research and Documentation Center (WARDC), Initiative for Women’s Studies in Nigeria (IWSN), National Democratic Institute (NDI) , Centre for Democracy and Development CDD) , Action Aid Nigeria, USAID/Nigeria, and the Fredrich Erbert Stiftung. Dr. Pogoson research interests are in the following areas: Governance and Development; Gender and Women’s studies; International Politics and Nigeria’s foreign policy. She is well published internationally and locally and has many journal articles, chapters in books and monographs to her credit. She is widely travelled and has attended numerous international and local conferences.

dominique:


How many men put their lives on hold for their wives' career? If you're talking about the momentary aspect, that's hardly hardly a sacrifice because money can still be replaced but lost time can never be.

Men do it all the time.... I pray you don't get a man who won't make sacrifices for you both financially and timewise the gender violence against men is too much for mention... Look at you saying monetary sacrifices are hardly sacrifices. Sounds like what an ingrate will say. Seriously you women don't deserve us!

She never Chichumchin

otipoju:
When your children are young is the best time to bond with them, teach them things and be involved in their lives, once they get into their teenage years no matter how hard you try to build a relationship, you will be considerd a stranger.

I once had a neighbour who said the only time she talks to her dad is when she needs money.

Story of my life

wait a few more years then we can start the topic of regrets madam.

A professor without sense. Such species are typically found in Nigeria

dominique:
Before fellas start dancing on this thread, read this



Shes not sad about the marriage loss but how independent her children has become and are hardly involving her in their lives. If she was to turn back the hands of time, she will still pick her career but raise her children differently. Marriage must never be a woman's biggest achievement in life.

Madam pride is what made her claim she did not regret divorcing her husband. I'm sure you skipped where she mentioned her husband holding the home front for her and yet she went ahead to divorce him.

She will get all the money, name and accolades. Pile them up beside her one day and reminisce over her life. Then you will get her true confession. She is an irresponsible woman.

Her mode of communication with her children- WhatsApp and texts depicts how self-centred and uncaring she is.

I know someone who at 72 years, and having 6 male children who are all professionals in Europe and America, is seeking for a wife now! All his children do not see him and his properties in Nigeria as worth their time!

She is successful in her career and a failure at the home front.

Life is a teacher
You never know the value of what you have
Until you lose it

God pls I don't want this type of woman who's career is more important than the family..... Family over anything

So y complain. Even d husband too care of d home in ur absence yet u still divorced probably cos he demanded u com play ur role n now u want to feel needed.

Ur kids basically arent bothered by ur absence...who saii. Marry ur career na. It will comfort n caress u

Women r confused beings. They dont even knw wat they want

T

dominique:
Before fellas start dancing on this thread, read this



Shes not sad about the marriage loss but how independent her children has become and are hardly involving her in their lives. If she was to turn back the hands of time, she will still pick her career but raise her children differently. Marriage must never be a woman's biggest achievement in life.

She is callous ,shallow minded and not a believer. Professorship is not wisdom . The husband held forte n she is saying it's very casually.so she divorced the man and the man goes back to start all over again . What a wicked cheat

You all need to learn and respect the fact that not everyone is family oriented. Stop trying to project your own beliefs and feelings on another person because while backgrounds might be similar, experiences and the lessons you learn from that will not be, which is how we have all come to be different.

Game of throne= Family is everything

Yankee101:
You reap as you sow baby

YEA, TRUE TALK
WHY COMPLAINING NOW. YOU CHOOSE YOUR DEGREE ABOVE THEM. ENJOY YOUR CAREER WHILE IT LAST AND PRAY NOTHING HAPPENS WHEN YOU HAVE TO DEPEND ON THEM FOR SUPPORT OR LIVE -IN.

THEN YOU WILL FEEL PINCH. MAY GOD HELP YOU.

The woman has obviously failed but she. Is too proud to admit it to the media. Shame

sunbilor:
Madam pride is what made her claim she did not regret divorcing her husband. I'm sure you skipped where she mentioned her husband holding the home front for her and yet she went ahead to divorce him.

She will get all the money, name and accolades. Pile them up beside her one day and reminisce over her life. Then you will get her true confession. She is an irresponsible woman.

Her mode of communication with her children- WhatsApp and texts depicts how self-centred and uncaring she is.

I know someone who at 72 years, and having 6 male children who are all professionals in Europe and America, is seeking for a wife now! All his children do not see him and his properties in Nigeria as worth their time!

She is successful in her career and a failure at the home front.

You are objective. If I read your response I won't have written mine .This woman is making me have a rethink now .Bc right now I am holding forte. Self centred women . Then when she is in need of a partner she looks for a younger partner after using the man battered

Selfishness personified.

dominique:
Before fellas start dancing on this thread, read this



Shes not sad about the marriage loss but how independent her children has become and are hardly involving her in their lives. If she was to turn back the hands of time, she will still pick her career but raise her children differently. Marriage must never be a woman's biggest achievement in life.

Is it about dancing about the thread or about pointing out the facts? You lot have a serious problem. See the direction you took it to. Her write up is laced with regrets and it is obvious she is so full of herself. Aside that, she is cunning and a foool for saying her children have become too independent. Does the illustration paint independence or lack of respect and disappointments?? If your children do not call you nor respond to your message in good time, it means they lack respect for you and care less about you not independent. So, Miss woman crusader, read well before you spill jargons next time.

dominique:
Before fellas start dancing on this thread, read this



Shes not sad about the marriage loss but how independent her children has become and are hardly involving her in their lives. If she was to turn back the hands of time, she will still pick her career but raise her children differently. Marriage must never be a woman's biggest achievement in life.

I can't believe your understanding is this shallow, smh

It also baffles me why you dragged men into this, when it wasn't her focus

Enoquin:
You all need to learn and respect the fact that not everyone is family oriented. Stop trying to project your own beliefs and feelings on another person because while backgrounds might be similar, experiences and the lessons you learn from that will not be, which is how we have all come to be different.

You don't start a family when you know you will not be family oriented.

Career over family? . I have always thought family comes first.