Good morning peeps.what is the first thing you do when you wake in the morning? Instead of me to pray when I wake the first I do is check nairalander.Is this addiction or obsession?Is anyone having same issue

Rollover and give her one.

Then I say my prayers.

I say THANK YOU JESUS as I stretch or yawn!!

I kneel beside my bed, clasp my hands together, then pray to Almighty God.

I be like 'ehn oti ji,ok....but where we wan see work today like this....(shakes head) mtcheew...

Kissup:
Instead of me to pray when I wake the first I do is check nairalander.Is this addiction or obsession?Is anyone having same issue

Now clap for yourself.

Pick my phone and check whatsapp....


Then go brush.... Look for wetin man go chop.

Drink water.
1 whole bottle.

Masturbateee

check time.... turn on tv.. check out sky sport news update... reply offline messages from last night... go pee cos am sure my Dickson must have been at attention already..
better to relieve him of duty

morning sex
then pray for forgiveness

I cant wait to get married and start sleeping with wrapper, I am missing out.

Lalas247:
morning sex
then pray for forgiveness

Lalas247:
morning mastur.bation then pray for forgiveness

Hmmm I understand.... oiling is necessary

Kissup:
Good morning peeps.what is the first thing you do when you wake in the morning? Instead of me to pray when I wake the first I do is check nairalander.Is this addiction or obsession?Is anyone having same issue

You're in soup

ifyalways:
Masturbateee

Which kind soup

weyreypey:

You're in soup

When I wake, I'd be in the bed for few minutes meditating the get up do press up and sit ups. Drink water before reading news with my fone after that take a bathe, dress, eat the lastly brush my teeth before heading out to hustle...

Play gospel songs while meditating and i do that for 30 mins, thou songs can keep playing till it's time to go out.
Whatever i say to myself, so it is...The only thing i tell God is Please listen to my heart.

I say my solat...

Wake to the sound of music and try to extract fleeting ideas from dream/subconscious memory bank.

ifyalways:
Masturbateee

I thought u are married?

First thing I do when I wake up is ; check the time, tell myself I can sleep alittle longer without running late, say the Lord's prayer, and dose off for about 20 mins before hitting the bathroom .

Enter the toilet, sit on the WC & light a stick of Benson Boost - and then recite the Lord's Prayer.

My Father who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done on earth, as it is in Asorock.

Give me this day my daily burger; and forgive me my trespasses, as I forgive those who trespass against me on Nairaland; and lead me not into temptation, but deliver me from the erotic shackles of Missy89.

For thine is the Olosho Kingdom, and the Erection and the Glorious Ejaculation forever - Amen!

Zoharariel:
Enter the toilet, sit on the WC & light a stick of Benson Boost - and then recite the Lord's Prayer.

My Father who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, on earth as it is in Asorock.

Give me this day my daily burger; and forgive me my trespasses, as I forgive those who trespass against me on Nairaland; and lead me not into temptation, but deliver me from shackles of Missy89 & Havilla.

For thine is the Olosho Kingdom, and the Erection and the Glorious Ejaculation forever - Amen!

if u sin against the holy Spirit"YOU WILL NOT BE FORGIVEN"

Rosarie:
if u sin against the holy Spirit"YOU WILL NOT BE FORGIVEN"

Forgiven by who? The white-bearded sky daddy & his son seated on a 24karat solid gold throne surrounded by 24-jobless elders shouting Hosanna, Hosanna, Hosanna from morning till night - while their precious creation "Earth" is being ravaged by all kinds of chaos & anarchy you could imagine?

Sango will strike all of them dead with 9Billion Gigawatts of lightning bolt.

Trust me, I have gone through the school of religion & graduated with distinctions.

History is littered with the corpses of dead gods such as Zeus, Horus, Osiris, Mazda, Yahweh & Jesus.

Rosarie:
if u sin against the holy Spirit"YOU WILL NOT BE FORGIVEN"

as if everybody wants to go to heaven

Zoharariel:


Forgiven by who? The white-bearded sky daddy & his son seated on a 24karat solid gold throne surrounded by 24-jobless elders shouting Hosanna, Hosanna, Hosanna from morning till night - while their precious creation "Earth" is being ravaged by all kinds of chaos & anarchy you could imagine?

Sango will strike all of them dead with 9Billion Gigawatts of lightning bolt.

Trust me, I have gone through the school of religion & graduated with distinctions.

History is littered with the corpses of dead gods such as Zeus, Horus, Osiris, Mazda, Yahweh & Jesus.

haaaaahaaa !!!,hmm, religious fanatics will not find your view funny,but seriously the concept of heaven will be the most boring and frustrating place to be, imagine playing gong and samba singing praise from morning till morning and living in diamond houses with golden streets forever,the idea of conscious immortality is a mental prison itself,stay 100 years in a heavenly golden house ,beating gong and you will wish for the hustle and bustle of an earthly street.

okoroemeka:
haaaaahaaa !!!,hmm, religious fanatics will not find your view funny,but seriously the concept of heaven will be the most boring and frustrating place to be, imagine playing gong and samba singing praise from morning till morning and living in diamond houses with golden streets forever,the idea of conscious immortality is a mental prison itself,stay 100 years in a heavenly golden house ,beating gong and you will wish for the hustle and bustle of an earthly street.

Baba, may your days be longer than the lifespan of average Palm Trees - which is 120Years.

Notorious B.I.G aka Biggie Smallz aka Frank White aka Lucifer don already talk am for one of him songs titled "Hold Ya Head - Biggie Smallz feat. Bob Marley"

[Verse 1: Notorious B.I.G.]

When I die, fvck it I wanna go to hell

Cause I'm a piece of shiit, it ain't hard to fuckin' tell

It don't make sense, goin' to heaven wit' the goodie-goodies

Dressed in white, I like black Timbs (Timberland Boots) and black hoodies

God will probably have me on some real strict shiit

No sleepin' all day, no gettin my diick licked

Hangin' with the goodie-goodies loungin' in paradise

Fvck that shiit, I wanna tote guns and shoot dice

All my life I've been considered as the worst

Lyin' to my mother, even stealin' out her purse

Crime after crime, from drugs to extortion

I know my mother wished she got a fvckin' abortion