postmann:


A man who marries a richer woman has a lot of questions to answer...

And why should any sensible man do that? The stats even in the so called civilized countries are painting doom and gloom for such a man and the union.

And the woman themselves never feel fulfilled with a lesser earning husband. A lot of them experience "status leakage" No woman wants a toy boy

Women basically don't have such a large heart as men do -- to be the primary breadwinner or a co-contributor and be happy at it like a man would.

@last paragraph, why do you think so?

2buffagain:
@MissRaine69
@Elder001
@pocohantas
@Rokia2
@TheNaijaMan
@WizAkzy

Thoughts?

You need four accounts
1. His own personal account
2. Her own personal account
3. An account where all the bills are paid from - you contribute 50-50
4. A savings account where both signatures are required to withdraw money both agree how much both put into this account monthly or every other month
What you do with what’s left over in your account is your business.

MissRaine69:

You need four accounts
1. His own personal account
2. Her own personal account
3. An account where all the bills are paid from - you contribute 50-50
4. A savings account where both signatures are required to withdraw money both agree how much both put into this account monthly or every other month
What you do with what’s left over in your account is your business.

Interesting..

My wife and I share bills but don't operate four accounts..

whatever works for every other couple out there though.

postmann:


A man who marries a richer woman has a lot of questions to answer...

And why should any sensible man do that? The stats even in the so called civilized countries are painting doom and gloom for such a man and the union.

And the woman themselves never feel fulfilled with a lesser earning husband. A lot of them experience "status leakage" No woman wants a toy boy husband.

Women basically don't have such a large heart as men do -- to be the primary breadwinner or a co-contributor and be happy at it like a man would.

That the woman is earning more doesn't mean the husband won't contribute.

This is the 21st century.. the earlier you awaken from the drunken patriarchal mentality the better for you.

Elder001:


Interesting..

My wife and I share bills but don't operate four accounts..

whatever works for every other couple out there though.

Until something happens ....

MissRaine69:

Until something happens ....

Something like?

MissRaine69:

You need four accounts
1. His own personal account
2. Her own personal account
3. An account where all the bills are paid from - you contribute 50-50
4. A savings account where both signatures are required to withdraw money both agree how much both put into this account monthly or every other month
What you do with what’s left over in your account is your business.

So basically same as mentioned in the OP.
Like this is such a common sense and stress-free way to go about it.

Elder001:



ladies are the ones who mostly declare false assets.

I disagree. It is men who hide their salaries because "they don't want their wives to know what they earn and make demands"

Elder001:


That the woman is earning more doesn't mean the husband won't contribute.

This is the 21st century.. the earlier you awaken from the drunken patriarchal mentality the better for you.

I'll tell you what; when your wife nurses your child on one breast, I implore you to take hold of the other and nurse to your fill. Be mindful of your file of adult teeth while at it so you don't bite the life out of her as she nurses you along with the infant.

While your brain is scientifically proven to be bigger (with larger IQ) than hers and a corresponding set of muscles as added bonus, you'd make for a poster boy of the ever emasculated 21st century male for not bringing them home where it matters most.

bukatyne:


@last paragraph, why do you think so?

Simple! Empirical observation, verifiable stats.

ImaIma1:



I disagree. It is men who hide their salaries because "they don't want their wives to know what they earn and make demands"

This isn't shít, you know?

Why should I hide my salary from my wife because she wants demands? she works too and earn so why will she be making demands when she got her own cash unless she's broke?

postmann:

Simple! Empirical observation, verifiable stats.

You haven't said anything.

All the women you observed/ engaged, why did they have issues handling most of the finances?

Elder001:



This isn't shít, you know?

Why should I hide my salary from my wife because she wants demands? she works too and earn so why will she be making demands when she got her own cash unless she's broke?

Easy tiger.

I am only telling you what i have seen and heard constantly which does not apply to me anyway.

You seem to be very money conscious and alert.

2buffagain:


I certainly shouldn't.
but the thing about the human brain is that habits are best formed when you start something from the get-go in a particular way.

I mean, The couple could agree on the creed for future while starting out with one income...but the thing is, it is easy for people (especially nigerian women I have noticed) to be comfortable with the whole "not-generating-income" situation and whatever we are talking about in this thread will that way relegate itself into being a "forever future" plan.

Yes there are exceptions like childbirth, but I find a lot of our women over-extend that phase....and eventually even start arguing why they should even be involved in financial contributions years later when the habit of "not being involved" has already been formed.

That is why, neurologically speaking, it is better if the couple start things off in a structured way right from the get-go.

Okay, I see your point but then, some men are the ones that mismanage the funds, infact I would say, women handle money better than men.

Women feel fulfilled irrespective of if the guy earns less provided other conditions are met. So if a guy earns less than me whilst I can afford a quality lifestyle, I'll be unhappy whilst He's faithful, caring n a wonderful communicator? Odiegwu

postmann:


A man who marries a richer woman has a lot of questions to answer...

And why should any sensible man do that? The stats even in the so called civilized countries are painting doom and gloom for such a man and the union.

And the women themselves never feel fulfilled with a lesser earning husband. A lot of them experience "status leakage" No woman wants a toy boy husband.

Women basically don't have such a large heart as men do -- to be the primary breadwinner or a co-contributor and be happy at it like a man would.

Gloriagee:
Women feel fulfilled irrespective of if the guy earns less provided other conditions are met. So if a guy earns less than me whilst I can afford a quality lifestyle, I'll be unhappy whilst He's faithful, caring n a wonderful communicator? Odiegwu

To dream is free.

Not dreaming bro

postmann:


To dream is free.

bukatyne:


You haven't said anything.

All the women you observed/ engaged, why did they have issues handling most of the finances?

Women don't generally go into relationships with the expectation they'll be doing MOST of the financial spending. Be it societal expectations or biological conditioning, they far more proud and comfortable with a man who meets majority of their financial needs.

Women generally can't cope with work related stress and domestic obligation without feeling stressed, fatigued and unhappy.

Gloriagee:
Not dreaming bro

Ok

postmann:


Women don't generally go into relationships with the expectation they'll be doing MOST of the financial spending. Be it societal expectations or biological conditioning, they far more proud and comfortable with a man who meets majority of their financial needs.

Women generally can't cope with work related stress and domestic obligation without feeling stressed, fatigued and unhappy.

Thanks

They do not go into relationship with the expectation they'll be doing MOST of the financial spending BECAUSE they are expected to handle the domestic turf.

@Bold: Show me a man who would be happy handling work stress and finance while he has a wife then I would agree it is a woman thing ELSE, it is a human thing. If there is a delegation of duties, nobody will be happy doing every body's job.

Now, the above is theory.

In practical, it doesn't work that way.

bukatyne:


Thanks

They do not go into relationship with the expectation they'll be doing MOST of the financial spending BECAUSE they are expected to handle the domestic turf.


@Bold: Show me a man who would be happy handling work stress and finance while he has a wife then I would agree it is a woman thing ELSE, it is a human thing. If there is a delegation of duties, nobody will be happy doing every body's job.

Now, the above is theory.

In practical, it doesn't work that way.

Women are meant to do most of the house chores and men are expected to rake in most of the finance for the family upkeep. This is a biologically and physiologically backed gender categorized roles.

Statistics have proven men are 5 times more likely to cheat when their partners are the major breadwinners and it is partly because they find such women less attractive.

On the other hand it has been proven that men who do more house chores engage less in sex and their women find then less attractive.

When humans abuse nature, they can't escape the consequences.

There are lots of men who are the breadwinners, paying most/all the bills in the home and are happy and fulfilled doing it.

Fhemmmy:
What is the purpose of opening so many accounts?
WHat happened if the man oor the woman lost his or her job after the wedding and now the laziness is shown?
While some of the advice is applicable, some won't but a great place to start

I don't think they're many. People already have their own accounts before marriage. With marriage, they open a joint account where they pay bills from, and a savings account that remains untouched, so the only accounts that get opened upon marriage are just two: the joint and savings.

postmann:


Women are meant to do most of the house chores and men are expected to rake in most of the finance for the family upkeep. This is a biologically and physiologically backed gender categorized roles.

Statistics have proven men are 5 times more likely to cheat when their partners are the major breadwinners and it is partly because they find such women less attractive.

On the other hand it has been proven that men who do more house chores engage less in sex and their women find then less attractive.

When humans abuse nature, they can't escape the consequences.

There are lots of men who are the breadwinners, paying most/all the bills in the home and are happy and fulfilled doing it.

You are making my case for me.

In theory, (practical life is much more complex) women are to do chores and men are to finance the home.

Shouldn't it occur to anyone that it would be natural for a woman to feel 'bitter' when she is financing the home because she is expected to do the chores + finance the home?

Why do people behave as if the 'bitterness' is a vice especially when the husband is still traditionally inclined?

On the flip side, would a husband be happy picking up most of the domestic work after financing the home?

postmann:


I'll tell you what; when your wife nurses your child on one breast, I implore you to take hold of the other and nurse to your fill. Be mindful of your file of adult teeth while at it so you don't bite the life out of her as she nurses you along with the infant.

While your brain is scientifically proven to be bigger (with larger IQ) than hers and a corresponding set of muscles as added bonus, you'd make for a poster boy of the ever emasculated 21st century male for not bringing them home where it matters most.

Hey.
This is Shìt, you know?

What exactly are you trying to say with this post?
When did men start breast feeding babies?.

for the big heart stuff ..
man stop saying shìt, things ain't so anymore .

I don't think any Self conscious and intelligent man will want to marry a wife that can't co-provide alongside him.
Even the so called traditional men or alpha males want women who'll contribute too.

65% or more of married American ladies share bills(co-provide) with their husbands... so wtf is your point?

Times have changed.. men do the chores too you know.

That's why it's called a civilized world ,yeah?

You follow?

bukatyne:


You are making my case for me.

In theory, (practical life is much more complex) women are to do chores and men are to finance the home.

Shouldn't it occur to anyone that it would be natural for a woman to feel 'bitter' when she is financing the home because she is expected to do the chores + finance the home?

Why do people behave as if the 'bitterness' is a vice especially when the husband is still traditionally inclined?

On the flip side, would a husband be happy picking up most of the domestic work after financing the home?

Do you think him for a fool?
Since providing finance is his responsibility why don't you stick to doing the domestic work alone because they're your responsibility.

postmann:


Women are meant to do most of the house chores and men are expected to rake in most of the finance for the family upkeep. This is a biologically and physiologically backed gender categorized roles.

Statistics have proven men are 5 times more likely to cheat when their partners are the major breadwinners and it is partly because they find such women less attractive.

On the other hand it has been proven that men who do more house chores engage less in sex and their women find then less attractive.

When humans abuse nature, they can't escape the consequences.

There are lots of men who are the breadwinners, paying most/all the bills in the home and are happy and fulfilled doing it.

do yourself good by posting links to this statistics .

Nature indeed.. You must be living in a delusional world
I'm forced to ask. ..are you married?

Gloriagee:
Women feel fulfilled irrespective of if the guy earns less provided other conditions are met. So if a guy earns less than me whilst I can afford a quality lifestyle, I'll be unhappy whilst He's faithful, caring n a wonderful communicator? Odiegwu

The funny thing is he hasn't met up to 1% of the world's female population but he's making that useless generalization.

What I denoted from that post is that he's a guy or man with skewed 18th century mentality and probably living in a cave.

freecocoa:
Okay, I see your point but then, some men are the ones that mismanage the funds, infact I would say, women handle money better than men.

Really? despite handling better than men and contributing less most women are still financially dead if compared to their husbands... (talking about Nigeria)
You know what? handle your own finances not the joint finance or the man's money.

ImaIma1:


Easy tiger.

I am only telling you what i have seen and heard constantly which does not apply to me anyway.

You seem to be very money conscious and alert.

Someone who isn't money conscious can never have a good financial standing.

postmann:


Women are meant to do most of the house chores and men are expected to rake in most of the finance for the family upkeep. This is a biologically and physiologically backed gender categorized roles.

Statistics have proven men are 5 times more likely to cheat when their partners are the major breadwinners and it is partly because they find such women less attractive.

On the other hand it has been proven that men who do more house chores engage less in sex and their women find then less attractive.

When humans abuse nature, they can't escape the consequences.

There are lots of men who are the breadwinners, paying most/all the bills in the home and are happy and fulfilled doing it.

It'll only happen if you allow such to happen..
There are two types of males in this world:
Alpha males and
Beta Males.
Alpha males are the ones that won't share bills with their
wives and at the same time won't share house chores with
their wives... they're pre dominantly found in Africa and
some parts of Asia.
Beta males are the ones that share bills with their wives
and at the same time share house chores with their wives...
they're pre dominantly found in western countries and
some parts of Asia.
Alpha males are already going to extinction in civilized
countries.. a lot of them have embraced the "Beta male"
concept.
The type of man you choose to be is what'll determine your behaviour towards marriage.