i don;t really know where 2 post this, either family or romance, anyways, nine years ago, my mom was called in own hometown that her father was really sick and her attention was needed, the only person she trust me is my uncle, there is something about that guy i don;t really like, he act strange, before my mom left, my uncle came over, she explain the situation back home, and he said, there will be no problem taking care of me, 9'o clock that sunday i told him, i have 2 go to bed, he said he won;t let me unless, i take my shower, i told this fool, i never take a shower, before goin 2 bed before, he said, he doesn;t care, that i just have 2 no matter what, so i decide, so he could get of my case, after takin the shower, this guy said he have 2 dress for me, i told him im ten years old and i can take care of myself, he said he doesn;t care, what i do when my mom is here, but when his here i have 2 do it his way, as he was dressin for me, i notice he was touchin my private part and my breast 2 much, i went 2 my room and lock the door, in the middle of the night i heard something, it was him again, the next thing i know, he was inside of me, i scream, i yelll, but at night in nigeria, nobody will answer u, when he was done, he said if i tell, he will make sure, my head is been takin off, when my mom got back the next day, i put up the courage 2 tell her, i was shock by her answer, he lover her brother more than than she loves me, she said "Baby you are 2 young 2 be thinkin about sex right now",

Now nine years later, (im in usa), im one of the people that always believe in sex before marriage.(i never have sex after that day), but this ass hole as takin my JOY away from me, and i notice that there is no man in the world that could touch me that i won;t freeze up, and when i sleep, i still remember what happen nine years ago, and this man, right now his with his family back, livin happily with his family, but im not, i can;t have a boyfriend, because i don;t want 2 relive the situation again, and im not even over the first one,

as of now, all i want 2 do is pay this man the way he did 2 me, so im lettin u guys decide how

girl, i feel u. he did a very bad thing there but i dont think killing him is the best option. just sum up courage and forget about what happen 9 years ago. does it mean when u kill him, u still wont have the feeling coming up again? think about that, killing him will not solve ur situation. just pray to God to help u to get over it . thats all many women have been molested by their father, so what if he was ur father will u have killed him.

awww dats jsut so sad i cant believe ur mum sed wat she sed as well just try tellin her agin i mean u r grown up now confornt ur mum dats wat is her problem u r tellin her the truth like if she cant trust her own daughter who else can she trust try tellin ur dad as well but dat can be embarrassing anyway just confornt ur mum about wat is brother did
gud luck or if dis give u peace of mind just ask ur uncle y he did it?? n let him no u will neva forgive him he migt say sorry but i guess dat wint change anythin

While you think of murdering your uncle do not forget your mom, who looked the other way even after your testimony.

I think you should discuss this issue with your folks - mom and dad. You all should go for counselling afterwards.

About your uncle - blackmail him, tell his wife and kids and friends and all your family members, poison him even - will it change wat happened? I doubt.

Look towards the cure, concentrate on yourself

Sweet heart, I felt very sad reading your post. I believe there are a lot of people in Nigeria who have gone through this emotional experience. Most of the time, they are either ignored, belittled or blamed . I am very glad you chose to share this incident. I wish more women would come forward and share their stories. I wish more laws would be enacted to severly punish this aggressive behavior targeted at our future leaders. I am very sorry to hear about your story but I'm going to briefly tell you what I think you should do . I believe you may have passed through the process of self-hate ( blaming self), anger and you are now at a stage when revenge is first and foremost on your mind. It is normal to go through this stages . Your childhood was stolen away from you by a child molestor.
I would recommend this book to you by T. D Jakes "Woman thou art loosed" , I would also recommend that you go to Paula White's website. she was abused as a child. There are a lot of resources which you may find beneficial.

I would encourage you to punish your uncle by forgiving him. As far as I am concerned , he still has a hold on you. He shall continually have a hold on you until you can forgive him .
I would not say "forget about it" . that would be very unrealistic. But I would encourage you to forgive him, and in remembering it , you can say to your self "yes , he molested me", but here I am still standing. I shall make it.

I would have encouraged you to confront your mom, and your uncle if they were in the states. This sounds ridiculous but America is a free country, freedom of speech , human rights. The right to be heard. But considering the lawlessness in Nigeria somethings are better left unsaid , just for your safety.

Also , I would recommend that you open up to a potential lover about the events of the past . I know that an understanding spouse would be ready to work with you.

I would also encourage you to turn your blessing to a curse. It would be great if you can use your experience to help other young women in similar situations.

Above all , I would encouage you to get help. My heart bleeds , I mean bleeds daily because of the way we blam victims of sexual assualt. Seriously , the "woman" is to blame. what has an innocent 10 year old done . My heart also bleeds because of the way sexual molestation is handled in NIgeria. The victims are silenced and may be scared for life. But honey there is healing.And it needs to start from you mind. YOu chose to forgive, you chose to value yourself as a person, you chose to know it is no fault of yours , you chose to stay positive about the future.
I can go on and on, but let me stop here.

[s]Winches of nairaland the poster needs your help[/s]. . .lol
What you need is professional counselling. . .and strong will on your side to forget the past. It's your past, face the future. Now that you're grown bring your parents into this matter. I'm sure they will have a clearer picture of this matter. Although, your mum was at fault, but it will do you no good putting up blames. Tell her how you feel and forgive her.
As for your uncle, you don't need to seek revenge. ._{it won't change anything}. Believe me, God wasn't asleep when he raped you, so he'll fight for you. Forgive him and be nice to him. Although it hurts but try to. Relate with him like nothing has happened. . .One day, he'll be forced to come begging on his knees.

I think the first thing you should do is to seek some [b][/b]THERAPY
this would help you get your feelings in check Dont worry about getting a boy friend right now just get your self right.
discussing this situation with your parents might help but you know how our parents are they might blame you for what happened or call you a liar.
Getting revenge on your uncle wouldn't solve anything because the damage is done.
The best thing in my oppinion would be to cut him off. He, his wife and his children have absolutly nothing to do with them.
Dwelling on an issue such as this is giving your uncle the upper hand in your life if you ignore his family you win.

[color=#990000][/color][b][/b]Get Therapy its good for the soul

hey dreambig, for me, i will just shot his motherfuvkin ass and i will forget about everything, this man take away ur dream away from u, just kiddin, just faze the future,

am sorry gurl . ur story is really sad. i wouldn't tell u to do anythin to him. i think the only thin u can do is to forget that it ever happened. i know it's really heard to forget because the feelings still comes back but u just have to and move on with ur life.


[s] If it was me, amma blackmail the s h i t out of him. amma destroy his life, his family like s h i t. [/s]  That's a wrong advice don't try it plzzzzzzzzzzz cause come to think of it, if u shoot him or do anythin to hurt him, it's goin to affect ur family too cause ur mom is his sister (i guess it's biological). Anyway my point is that, just forget the past and focus on ur future and ur generation.

You all who replied this girl are very heartless! Dreambig darling, dont listen to these guys. Lets be realistic your uncle should be shot. If you were my sister, i'll have made him suffer. When I'm done with him (thats if he is alive) he'll confess his deeds and then apologize for the rest of his life.
My advice: Do not kill him cos you are not skilled in doing it without a trace. You might go to jail.
You should have family members that you can tell and will believe your story.
Forgive me for this, your mum is evil! Make her realise your disgust by either keeping off her, till she realises there is something wrong.
i've seen a girls in your kinda situation. One girl actually left home to stay with her friend, without the knowledge of her mum. Her terrified mum had to beg for forgiveness after not knowing the whereabouts of her daughter for weeks. But someone has to make this guy pay. I could but,

my sister it is sad to hear your story but killing him or harming him will just add more to your problem. you will live the rest of your life thinking of those two things (his action and yours). this is the best thing to do, its hard but you just have to do it. FORGIVE HIM, IT WILL REALLY HELP YOU.

AND AS FOR THE ISSUE OF NO GUY , ITS A MIND THING MY SISTER SO PLS LET IT GO.

OP, embrace the idea in your display image.
"read google before asking dumb questions"
in this scenario however, i'm not too sure google is your friend.

I hate rapists. They are the scum of the earth. They must all be destroyed. While there are decent guys going around trying hard to get attention and love, some minion just believes he can just cut through the pleasantries and rape. That bastard should not go free. But even far beyond rapists, I hate pedophiles. They are mentally deranged. They are the scum of the scum of the earth.

You should get a very large and clear picture of him and send it to one of the journalists in the Sun Newspaper, send his home address and business address with a brief essay. Let them start from there while we continue to think of more cruel things to do to him.

When I was just 8 years old, I had my first sexual experience with a girl of about 16. Then after a while she got her elder sister who was about 18 involved. We did all sorts of crazy stuff every single night. Technically, it was rape and pedophilia, but I won't tell you I have a grudge. In fact quite the opposite.

I was also affected psychologically in that till this very day, I'm hardly attracted to any woman who is not at least 10 years older than me. But should that be the end of my normal life? No! Gradually am changing. Of recent, I've actually gone out with some women a little below my age.

So don't let memories of that pig dampen your future. Live your sex life to the fullest. If you hate men, become a lesbian. But do not let any rapist take away your life.

Don't forget to send those items to a journalist at the Sun Newspaper. Those people know how to paint grey into black.

So don't lay low, and keep dreaming big.

Dont blame the inbicle may be he was instructed by his pastor to do that, civilised christians

things like are yet to happen to you, Hypocrates, Hahahahahha

just so sad to see idiots like you turn this sad painful personal story into another pastors bashing thing. when will you learn and probably grow up? you guys feel christianity is fair game because they dont do fatua and killing innocent people

Dont blame the inbicle may be he was instructed by his pastor to do that, civilised christians things like are yet to happen to you, Hypocrates, Hahahahahha

lets read it like this - Dont blame the inbicle may be he was instructed by his imam to do that, civilised muslims things like are yet to happen to you, Hypocrates, Hahahahahha

i think you should let God handle the situation
this is beyond your control

Your uncle is a dog and your mum is a cow!

How did u come up with that conclusion

How can a 10 yr old girl develop breast?

cut off his dyck if u can get hold of it .

mama-gee:

How can a 10 yr old girl develop breast?

ask google!

poster: go 4 counselling, try 2 get dis behind u n think of d future, leave him 2 karma!

Dreambig I can kill him for yu. Give me his address my email is shaarjo@yahoo.ca/

6000 dollars will be my fee.

PUT THE BASTARD BEHIND YOU, HE IS NOT WORTH IT. I KNOW IT MIGHT BE DIFFICULT BUT STARTING UP ANYTHING WONT HELP.

ABDUL

THE YORUBA PEOPLE DO SAY "OBE GE OMO LOWO, OMO JU OBE NU. OBE TI SE OHUN TI YOO SE" MEANING THAT A CHILD PLAYING WIT A KNIFE ACCIDENTALLY CUTS HIS HAND. HE ANGRILY THROWS THE KNIFE AWAY, THE KNIFE HAS DONE WAT IT WILL DO. THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO TO HIM IS TO KILL HIM COS EVERY OTHER THING U MAY PLAN TO DO FOR HIM WILL RESULT IN DEATH AT WORST AND EVEN DAT THAT CANNOT AND WILL NOT MAKE UP FOR THE DAMAGE HE HAS ALREADY DONE TO U. Y NOT PUT THE SHIT BEHIND U, STOP LOOKING BEHIND UR SHOULDER AND FACE THE FUTURE WHICH PROMISES MANY BETTER THINGS COMPARED TO WHAT D PAST HAS GIVEN TO U AND LEAVE ALL VENGEANCE TO GOD

Send me a mail, i know what to do. seggyoke@yahoo.com

Re: My Uncle despoiled Me. How Can I Punish Him?
« #19 on: June 17, 2009, 07:16 PM »

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How can a 10 yr old girl develop bosom ?
I started poping when I was 8 but they disappeared when I was 12

@poster,you need to conciosly let go,get help or it will ruin your life

it's 3 years ago since the poster posted, she must have done one of the advises given to her.


case closed.

Who knows? If the f*ker is still alive, then justice aint been served

its a terrible experiene,
sincerely u hav 2 give love a chance
get someone who truly loves u, & u will get over it with time
All d best

Try not to think about the 'sad' event and get around guys who you know are noble enough.
Shit happens but no one can reverse time to correct the wrongs. The deed has already been done, all you have to do right now is to move on wif lyf by making the best outta it.
Baseline, get yourself a relationship!!!