I'm a very antisocial person. I literally avoid talking to people because I don't like talking. In fact, I can only can express myself properly in writing. But I found out that when I meet people I like, I find myself trying to please them. I get to know them, understand their personality and find out what their likes and dislikes are and try to become the type of person that they can trust. I force my self to be 'flawless' for other people. Its like a hobby, or a mission. I can't help it . The problem is, I found out that they tend to get attached to me and I hate when that happens because I get tired of people real quick. Keep making yourself too available and I start getting irritated. I become cold, short tempered and sometimes I can be mean because I don't what you around anymore. When people get real close to me, they start to seem...pathetic (I'm sorry) to me. Its really affecting my relationship with people.
About three years ago when I was seventeen ( I was in secondary school), I had this 'friend'. She was soft hearted and kind of fragile and didn't have many friends. I befriended her and for some time we were cool. Later I didn't want to hang out with her anymore because... Well, she always wanted to hang out with me. She confronted me when I stopped talking to her as usual, she was apologising( for nothing in particular) because she thought she had hurt me, her eyes were teary. I was sad but I was angry at the same time because I couldn't get why a human being would be so dependent on another human bein. She was too weak to me. I wanted to say I was sorry, that I was wrong for the way I treated her but I dead ass looked this girl in the eye and walked away. I felt bad but I hoped she would stay away. That was when I first realized I had a problem because a part of me hated me, another part of me hated her. It was like a crisis in my head. I wanted to stay friends but I wished she was tougher
Fast forward to three years later. I'm in the university now and I have new friends but I still like to isolate myself because I get bored of them and I don't want to be around them sometimes. Those nasty things we say to each other start sounding disgusting to me. Its so bad I'm not able to say "I love you", or " I miss you" when they said it to me. My new roommate is also a very picky person but I got to know her and now she's real close to me( perhaps too close). I'm already worn out. The other day she noticed a change in my attitude and she asked me if I was angry. I snapped and yelled ; " you keep calling me and its annoying!" She only wanted to talk. I was so embarrassed at my self.
Its worse with men. I never take guys who approach me or text me first seriously. I tend to be more attracted to people who give me little or no attention because I feel they are 'stronger' or 'tougher' emotionally and I won't take advantage of them (easily). If these people eventually soften up, or fall for me, I'm out.
I can't remember a time when I wasn't like this. When I was younger my mum used to scold me a lot because people kept complaining to her that I dont socialize. Most times I just hate being around people and if I am, I try to maintain a low profile but I get the most attention because everyone wants to know why that mysterious girls leaves her friends to sit at the back and never talks to anyone.
It's not just people, its everything in general. I'm a 200l student. The other day I was telling a colleague that I was bored of life, that I wouldn't want to work in a hospital in the future. She asked me what I would do if I dropped out. I told her I didn't want to have a job because "I don't know if I can wake up to do the same thing everyday".
Everything bores me eventually. I feel like a narcissist. I'm also very straightforward. I tell people how I feel about them even though it hurts them because I've always believed that my feelings come first ( I'm not sure if that's a good thing anymore).
I've tried talking to people, nobody seems to understand. Im tired of breaking good relationships simply because I lose interest in people. I feel like I have different personalities and I become a different person each time one of them dominates.

Chiefqueenn:
I'm a very antisocial person. I literally avoid talking to people because I don't like talking. In fact, I can only can express myself properly in writing. But I found out that when I meet people I like, I find myself trying to please them. I get to know them, understand their personality and find out what their likes and dislikes are and try to become the type of person that they can trust. I force my self to be 'flawless' for other people. Its like a hobby, or a mission. I can't help it . The problem is, I found out that they tend to get attached to me and I hate when that happens because I get tired of people real quick. Keep making yourself too available and I start getting irritated. I become cold, short tempered and sometimes I can be mean because I don't what you around anymore. When people get real close to me, they start to seem...pathetic (I'm sorry) to me. Its really affecting my relationship with people.
About three years ago when I was seventeen ( I was in secondary school), I had this 'friend'. She was soft hearted and kind of fragile and didn't have many friends. I befriended her and for some time we were cool. Later I didn't want to hang out with her anymore because... Well, she always wanted to hang out with me. She confronted me when I stopped talking to her as usual, she was apologising( for nothing in particular) because she thought she had hurt me, her eyes were teary. I was sad but I was angry at the same time because I couldn't get why a human being would be so dependent on another human bein. She was too weak to me. I wanted to say I was sorry, that I was wrong for the way I treated her but I dead ass looked this girl in the eye and walked away. I felt bad but I hoped she would stay away. That was when I first realized I had a problem because a part of me hated me, another part of me hated her. It was like a crisis in my head. I wanted to stay friends but I wished she was tougher
Fast forward to three years later. I'm in the university now and I have new friends but I still like to isolate myself because I get bored of them and I don't want to be around them sometimes. Those nasty things we say to each other start sounding disgusting to me. Its so bad I'm not able to say "I love you", or " I miss you" when they said it to me. My new roommate is also a very picky person but I got to know her and now she's real close to me( perhaps too close). I'm already worn out. The other day she noticed a change in my attitude and she asked me if I was angry. I snapped and yelled ; " you keep calling me and its annoying!" She only wanted to talk. I was so embarrassed at my self.
Its worse with men. I never take guys who approach me or text me first seriously. I tend to be more attracted to people who give me little or no attention because I feel they are 'stronger' or 'tougher' emotionally and I won't take advantage of them (easily). If these people eventually soften up, or fall for me, I'm out.
I can't remember a time when I wasn't like this. When I was younger my mum used to scold me a lot because people kept complaining to her that I dont socialize. Most times I just hate being around people and if I am, I try to maintain a low profile but I get the most attention because everyone wants to know why that mysterious girls leaves her friends to sit at the back and never talks to anyone.
It's not just people, its everything in general. I'm a 200l student. The other day I was telling a colleague that I was bored of life, that I wouldn't want to work in a hospital in the future. She asked me what I would do if I dropped out. I told her I didn't want to have a job because "I don't know if I can wake up to do the same thing everyday".
Everything bores me eventually. I feel like a narcissist. I'm also very straightforward. I tell people how I feel about them even though it hurts them because I've always believed that my feelings come first ( I'm not sure if that's a good thing anymore).
I've tried talking to people, nobody seems to understand. Im tired of breaking good relationships simply because I lose interest in people. I feel like I have different personalities and I become a different person each time one of them dominates.

Will you also discard me if I marry you?

This is a road that will leave you frustrated for life if you don't desist from it.

It required serious therapy.

Thank God you're honest, call me lets chat.

Are you are virgin? If yes, that miserable attitude needs to be fvcked outta you

omo this matter be as e get o

You are nor alone on this.
My own case is similar only not extreme.and i have really tried to work on myself.
Its a good thing you have identified your problem,and that is the first step towards solving it.
Will advice you work on yourself by being friendly as usual. Make them know your own dislikes and likes too. You are entitled to it. You dont have to please everyone at the detriment of your own happiness .let them know this candidly, be honest about it with them and try to be accomodating too. We all need friends no matter what.

Chiefqueenn:
I'm a very antisocial person. I literally avoid talking to people because I don't like talking. In fact, I can only can express myself properly in writing. But I found out that when I meet people I like, I find myself trying to please them. I get to know them, understand their personality and find out what their likes and dislikes are and try to become the type of person that they can trust. I force my self to be 'flawless' for other people. Its like a hobby, or a mission. I can't help it . The problem is, I found out that they tend to get attached to me and I hate when that happens because I get tired of people real quick. Keep making yourself too available and I start getting irritated. I become cold, short tempered and sometimes I can be mean because I don't what you around anymore. When people get real close to me, they start to seem...pathetic (I'm sorry) to me. Its really affecting my relationship with people.
About three years ago when I was seventeen ( I was in secondary school), I had this 'friend'. She was soft hearted and kind of fragile and didn't have many friends. I befriended her and for some time we were cool. Later I didn't want to hang out with her anymore because... Well, she always wanted to hang out with me. She confronted me when I stopped talking to her as usual, she was apologising( for nothing in particular) because she thought she had hurt me, her eyes were teary. I was sad but I was angry at the same time because I couldn't get why a human being would be so dependent on another human bein. She was too weak to me. I wanted to say I was sorry, that I was wrong for the way I treated her but I dead ass looked this girl in the eye and walked away. I felt bad but I hoped she would stay away. That was when I first realized I had a problem because a part of me hated me, another part of me hated her. It was like a crisis in my head. I wanted to stay friends but I wished she was tougher
Fast forward to three years later. I'm in the university now and I have new friends but I still like to isolate myself because I get bored of them and I don't want to be around them sometimes. Those nasty things we say to each other start sounding disgusting to me. Its so bad I'm not able to say "I love you", or " I miss you" when they said it to me. My new roommate is also a very picky person but I got to know her and now she's real close to me( perhaps too close). I'm already worn out. The other day she noticed a change in my attitude and she asked me if I was angry. I snapped and yelled ; " you keep calling me and its annoying!" She only wanted to talk. I was so embarrassed at my self.
Its worse with men. I never take guys who approach me or text me first seriously. I tend to be more attracted to people who give me little or no attention because I feel they are 'stronger' or 'tougher' emotionally and I won't take advantage of them (easily). If these people eventually soften up, or fall for me, I'm out.
I can't remember a time when I wasn't like this. When I was younger my mum used to scold me a lot because people kept complaining to her that I dont socialize. Most times I just hate being around people and if I am, I try to maintain a low profile but I get the most attention because everyone wants to know why that mysterious girls leaves her friends to sit at the back and never talks to anyone.
It's not just people, its everything in general. I'm a 200l student. The other day I was telling a colleague that I was bored of life, that I wouldn't want to work in a hospital in the future. She asked me what I would do if I dropped out. I told her I didn't want to have a job because "I don't know if I can wake up to do the same thing everyday".
Everything bores me eventually. I feel like a narcissist. I'm also very straightforward. I tell people how I feel about them even though it hurts them because I've always believed that my feelings come first ( I'm not sure if that's a good thing anymore).
I've tried talking to people, nobody seems to understand. Im tired of breaking good relationships simply because I lose interest in people. I feel like I have different personalities and I become a different person each time one of them dominates.

It shows in your eyes .
I see coldness in your stare, even though you're staring at nothing in particular .
You need to see a psychologist

Tradernaija:


Will you also discard me if I marry you?

This is a road that will leave you frustrated for life if you don't desist from it.

It required serious therapy.

Thank God you're honest, call me lets chat.

Do you want to help me?

Chiefqueenn:
Do you want to help me?

Yes I will.
At least you're sincere.
Call me let talk.

Tradernaija:


Yes I will.

At least you're sincere.

Call me let talk.

Oga, how will you help her? Are you a trained psychologist?

@OP there's nothing "wrong" with you. You might act differently than how social norms expect people to be and that's not a bad thing. You can learn to be tactful, so you say what you feel without hurting people.