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Stats: 1238109 members, 1649953 topics. Date: Wednesday, 23 April 2014 at 01:41 PM
|Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Ialwaysask: 2:47am On Nov 07, 2010|
In western culture there is the engagement and the wedding then the honeymoon.
From what I have understood in Nigerian Culture there is an engagement a 'traditional'
ceremony, then a church wedding right?
I want to understand the essence of the traditional wedding, and how does
the dowry/brideprice work? Can anyone explain?
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Nobody: 2:54am On Nov 07, 2010|
There is no "Nigerian" wedding. Nigeria is divided into tribes, and each tribe has its own way.
I am a Yoruba woman, so I'll explain how mines goes.
Traditional marriage consists of two parts. The Introduction & The Engagement. It is now common for these two to flow into each other as they are held on the same day while the wedding ceremony for a Christian couple takes place the following day in the church. This is akin to the practice in the Biblical times when a bride is betrothed to her husband but the wedding celebration is at a future time.
The Introduction is the part of the ceremony where the groom’s family introduces themselves to the bride’s family and also makes known their intention to ask for the hand of the bride (from the bride’s family) in marriage to their son. This is done through the help of a spokesperson on both sides of the families. The spokesperson on the groom’s side is referred to as The Standing Chairman (“alaga iduro” in the Yoruba language). The spokesperson on the bride’s side is referred to as The Sitting Chairman (“alaga ijoko” in the Yoruba language). Most of the exchanges will be between The Standing Chairman and The Sitting Chairman.
A proposal letter written by the groom is presented to the bride’s family and in return, an acceptance letter is given to the groom’s family and the engagement follows.
The Engagement is the part where the groom’s family is expected to bring the items listed in the engagement list given to them. This list is often agreed upon ahead of time and may include some of the following items: yams, honey, salt, fish, drinks, a suitcase of clothes for the bride, The Bible, an engagement ring, etc. Each of these items has its own significant symbolism which serves as the spring board for prayers during the ceremony. The groom will present the bride with her engagement ring. Both the bride and groom are then prayed for by the heads of both families including their parents and others appointed on each family’s behalf.
After prayers, families and friends of the bride and groom are invited to eat and dance.
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by mens dept: 5:49am On Nov 07, 2010|
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Ialwaysask: 1:43pm On Nov 07, 2010|
Thanks Ileke Idi, So when you say introduction do you mean it is at the
introduction/engagement ceremony that both families are only just
meeting themselves for the first time?
And this proposal letter? So the groom actually writes that he wants to
marry the bride? Wow! How long are engagement lists Why would they
request a suitcase of clothes for the bride? What happens if the groom cannot
produce some of the items on the list? Why do the family of the bride even make
requests of the groom?
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Nobody: 5:59pm On Nov 07, 2010|
For some cases, yea, it's only that time that the parents are just meeting. Some people would rather leave their parent out of their personal life until they're sure they're both walking down the aisle. I think it makes a lot of sense that way.
And for some cases, the parents do know each other, but the engagement ceremony is just to sit both parents down to celebrate their engagement with agreement, thanks and gratitude and ofcourse FOOOOOOOOOOOD. At the engagement party, the bride will knee before her own parents so she may be blessed then knees before the groom's parent so that they may pray for her.
Yes @ the proposal letter. The Groom brings a proposal letter from the groom's family, usually tied with a pink ribbon, and gives it to the groom's family, through the olopa ijoko. The letter is read out, and responded to verbally on the spot. Since this is mostly a formality, and it is already known that the couple will marry, there usually is not much rejection at this point.
The typical Yoruba Eng. list:
I'm not really sure about the suitcase, but I believe it's to pack her out of her mother's house. Back in the days, a yoruba woman is expected to live with her parents until she's been "asked for".
Why you asked? It's tradition. It'ds like a dowry, you know
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Nobody: 8:15am On Nov 08, 2010|
THIS IS THE CAKE. . . . EVEN HAS THE LUGGAGE DESIGNED DON IT
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by EzeUche0(m): 8:15am On Nov 08, 2010|
Go to bed my dear.
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Nobody: 8:21am On Nov 08, 2010|
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by EzeUche0(m): 8:23am On Nov 08, 2010|
Not this again. Is this your new word for me? I hope not. It is not welcoming. I would like to hear words like please, come, enjoy, and other pleasant words my dear.
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Nobody: 8:26am On Nov 08, 2010|
Lol you're never going to hear those words and you know why.
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by EzeUche0(m): 8:26am On Nov 08, 2010|
Even though the word "no" sounds good coming from you, why would I not hear or see pleasant words from you?
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Nobody: 8:31am On Nov 08, 2010|
EzeUche0:Edem, lol, are you bored?
You wont hear or see them because you're Ezeuche.
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by EzeUche0(m): 8:33am On Nov 08, 2010|
No, I am not bored. I just want a little fun. Those debates took a lot out of me. It was very tiresome and time-consuming. Is it because I am Igbo? So that Ghanaian is good enough, but not a fellow Nigerian? I am hurt!
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Nobody: 8:35am On Nov 08, 2010|
EzeUche0:LOL Then go and get some apple cide, will cool you down.
No, because you're not loyal. 80% chance of whatever you know ending up on NL , like my name
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by EzeUche0(m): 8:36am On Nov 08, 2010|
I am not loyal? That is a lie. And what are you talking about 80% chance? Explain.
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Nobody: 8:40am On Nov 08, 2010|
EzeUche0:No, you're not. LOL At the spur of anger, you can say anything
Forget the 805 chance .
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by EzeUche0(m): 8:41am On Nov 08, 2010|
We will discuss this at a later date. I am not giving up. Like you should already know, Igbo men can be quite stubborn at times. Soon, you will be preparing me egusi soup like my mother used to make me.
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Nobody: 8:44am On Nov 08, 2010|
cheii, as long as you turn into a full yoruba man. . .
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Dynamite98: 9:31pm On Nov 09, 2010|
[/quote]We will discuss this at a later date. [b]I am not giving up. Like you should already know, Igbo men can be quite stubborn at times. [/b]Soon, you will be preparing me egusi soup like my mother used to make me.
Don't give up, your day of joy is coming
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Dynamite98: 9:33pm On Nov 09, 2010|
;d ;d ;d
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Dynamite98: 10:11pm On Nov 09, 2010|
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by Dilinox: 7:53am On Oct 21, 2013|
|Re: Traditional Nigerian Wedding. by AlveenaEvents: 10:51am On Feb 22|
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