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Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? - Family - Nairaland

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Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by awuf2008: 12:49pm On Dec 29, 2010
The rate of divorce cases accross the world is on the increase and if d trend is not checked, it could lead to situation whereby men wil no longer get married. And from research, it shows the women are mostly the causes of broken marriages in naija and around d world. Do u hv a different view? Make ur contributions known here.
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by Nobody: 1:15pm On Dec 29, 2010
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Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by Coolabbie: 9:59pm On Dec 29, 2010
Its not right putting the blame on just one person.Both parties ought to be held responsible.
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by Ndipe(m): 12:28am On Dec 30, 2010
awuf2008:

The rate of divorce cases accross the world is on the increase and if d trend is not checked, it could lead to situation whereby men wil no longer get married. And from research, it shows the women are mostly the causes of broken marriages in naija and around d world. Do u hv a different view? Make your contributions known here.   

Who did this unfounded research?

1 Like

Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by otukpo(f): 11:52am On Dec 30, 2010
In most cases men.

I say men because of their infidelity, dishonesty and some are wife batterers.
That is not to say that some women are not guilty of these vices, but ,

1 Like

Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by koolguy88(m): 12:00pm On Dec 30, 2010
both partners (man and woman) are to be blamed because they both signed "for better, for worse".

1 Like

Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by NeroPapas(m): 12:05pm On Dec 30, 2010
The person to blame is whoever start relenting on the efforts required to make the marriage last, whoever starts taking the other party for granted should be blamed and women are good at this!! grin cheesy grin

As my people talk am: Man marry woman hope say she no go change, Woman marry man hope say im go change. At the end, the man no change, the woman come show her thru colour by changing from pretense to reality and na the house go suffer am by breaking down. grin grin grin grin undecided
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by Nobody: 12:06pm On Dec 30, 2010
The leading cause of broken marriages (especially in Naija) is that far too many women want to wear trousers these days. We all know who the head of the house used to be during time of our parents and grandparents. But these days too much education, media influence, career development, and all sorts of negative exposure have increased feminist tendencies such that wives are now insufferably stubborn and unsubmissive. '50 - 50', 'equality' 'beside you, not behind you', etc. Those are the unpragmatic things they cling on to. Invariably, when a full-fledged man with a healthy ego marries a misguided woman with such mentality, it is only a matter of time before the marriage collapses.
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by member479760: 12:40pm On Dec 30, 2010
moda!
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by oweniwe(m): 12:56pm On Dec 30, 2010
NeroPapas:

The person to blame is whoever start relenting on the efforts required to make the marriage last, whoever starts taking the other party for granted should be blamed and women are good at this!! grin cheesy grin

As my people talk am: Man marry woman hope say she no go change, Woman marry man hope say im go change. At the end, the man no change, the woman come show her thru colour by changing from pretense to reality and na the house go suffer am by breaking down. grin grin grin grin undecided

Gbosa Gbosa Gbosa
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by dondada1(m): 1:11pm On Dec 30, 2010
Mother Inlaws
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by fukkyjohn: 1:18pm On Dec 30, 2010
men are meant to blame for broken in marriage because they are not faithful
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by Mekiko: 1:29pm On Dec 30, 2010
@chaircover's response you've said it all.it surely takes two to tango.
@poster get over it already.statistics is just a bunch of b.s and we all know it.
aren't human beings responsible for these so called researches to come up with statistics?
people just always wanna have some person to blame for their failures in life.
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by Joyland(m): 1:35pm On Dec 30, 2010
I blame it on the women, because broken marriages usually stem from infidelity. Admittedly, infidelity among women of today is on the increase worldwide and no husband is ready to accept that, hence the increase of broken marriages today.
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by bigfat: 1:42pm On Dec 30, 2010
usulay the woman and the man
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by sayso: 2:29pm On Dec 30, 2010
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Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by MsTom(f): 2:30pm On Dec 30, 2010
The man and the woman
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by delimit(m): 2:33pm On Dec 30, 2010
50:50
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by Ranoscky(m): 2:50pm On Dec 30, 2010
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman?

How do I give an answer to a broken marriage that I don't know how it occured? undecided Depends on what happened between both couples. All broken marraiges did not end up being of same reason(s), so, it depends on who's faulty!
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by unclesamtech(m): 3:00pm On Dec 30, 2010
I dont have any answer; May God see Us (Married Men ad Women) through
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by Ugeh: 3:04pm On Dec 30, 2010
pro01:

The leading cause of broken marriages (especially in Naija) is that far too many women want to wear trousers these days. We all know who the head of the house used to be during time of our parents and grandparents. But these days too much education, media influence, career development, and all sorts of negative exposure have increased feminist tendencies such that wives are now insufferably stubborn and unsubmissive. '50 - 50', 'equality' 'beside you, not behind you', etc. Those are the unpragmatic things they cling on to. Invariably, when a full-fledged man with a healthy ego marries a misguided woman with such mentality, it is only a matter of time before the marriage collapses.

Case closed cool cool cool cool cool
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by afokstoomuci(m): 3:16pm On Dec 30, 2010
the true of the matter is women are 70% while men are 30%.The reason is that women are selfish in the sense that they want men to sacrifice everything to them,love,money,etc and when he fail just one day they grow angry and started behaving funny which can lead to broken relationship.
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by nakoks(m): 3:27pm On Dec 30, 2010
Women.women,women,

If the husband says pls dont do this,thats when she will do it.how do we say it those days(the thing wey you go do wey dem go take kill you na im dem go dey do)
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by Meldrick(m): 3:35pm On Dec 30, 2010
pro01:

The leading cause of broken marriages (especially in Naija) is that far too many women want to wear trousers these days. We all know who the head of the house used to be during time of our parents and grandparents. But these days too much education, media influence, career development, and all sorts of negative exposure have increased feminist tendencies such that wives are now insufferably stubborn and unsubmissive. '50 - 50', 'equality' 'beside you, not behind you', etc. Those are the unpragmatic things they cling on to. Invariably, when a full-fledged man with a healthy ego marries a misguided woman with such mentality, it is only a matter of time before the marriage collapses.

Gbam!!!!
A very brilliant and correct observation.
The ladies all wanna be like those American female superstars who marry and divorce at will.
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by Meldrick(m): 3:38pm On Dec 30, 2010
afokstoomuci:

the true of the matter is women are 70% while men are 30%.The reason is that women are selfish in the sense that they want men to sacrifice everything to them,love,money,etc and when he fail just one day they grow angry and started behaving funny which can lead to broken relationship.

hahaha!!!! another one. Have you not heard the saying Honey na Money, Money na Honey. Marriage today is for better for best. Once challenges come, you are on your own.
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by Nobody: 3:48pm On Dec 30, 2010
Most comes from women because they want to be independent in their marriage.
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by MrStrategy(m): 4:12pm On Dec 30, 2010
This interesting question cannot be comprehensively answered in a brief post but I'll try.
Who (or what) is to blame for collapsing buildings, or companies getting bankrupt or even Nigeria's backwardness? They have the same answer we seek: disobeying timeless principles will always result in disaster.
Marriage is an irrevocable covenant created by God to bind a man & wife together. There are several principles that govern marriage. Good marriages are not purchased, they are cultivated. If one person (or both parties) breaks these principles, the effect is their marriages will crash.
Here are some principles of building a good marriage:
1. The man & woman must properly leave their parents to start their new home.
2. Sex must be preserved for marriage & in marriage alone.
3. Love must be selfless, cultivated over time & must pass several tests.

PLEASE LIST OTHER RULES OF A GOOD MARRIAGE, THEY ARE MANY.
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by Tcrack(m): 4:13pm On Dec 30, 2010
poeple gat married for different reasons  but the truth is marriage is  not for everyone. Apart from having kids, i dont see any good reason why i should get married
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by kcjazz(m): 4:23pm On Dec 30, 2010
My two cents

Education- More women are educated. They don't take the rubbish they used to, which can be managed. Problem is, some men still operate in the past.

Television- Exposure, it could be right or wrong

Economic dynamics- In the past, men worked while women stayed home, not the same anymore. Money is the main cause of divorce.

Society- When are you getting married? society. At the end, people are pushed to marry all to please parents and society.

Marriage counselling- I feel churches need to update pre-marital counseling to include the unique problems of today.
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by jchublue: 4:33pm On Dec 30, 2010
It is a popular school of thought that Nigerian marriages last because our institution of marriage is premised on core African cultural principles.

The husband and the wife know their clearly-defined roles. The man is the bread-winner/hunter/gatherer and custodian of the community ideals. The woman is the home-maker/chef/nurse/change-nurse/ incubator and the conduit pipe of moral values.

Of course, things are changing; Western education, exposure and global culture continually erode traditional roles and notions of the duties of spouses in their marriages. It is not uncommon to see Mama Wale pursue a career in investment banking, while Papa Ihuoma may happily help change the baby’s soiled nappies. Baba Ismaila may even be persuaded to operate and push the baby pram while his wife sorts out the blown electric fuse in the house,

For the rest, read this link: http://woahnigeria./2010/10/15/let-us-play-mama-and-papa/
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by Roughlen(m): 5:34pm On Dec 30, 2010
pro01:

The leading cause of broken marriages (especially in Naija) is that far too many women want to wear trousers these days. We all know who the head of the house used to be during time of our parents and grandparents. But these days too much education, media influence, career development, and all sorts of negative exposure have increased feminist tendencies such that wives are now insufferably stubborn and unsubmissive. '50 - 50', 'equality' 'beside you, not behind you', etc. Those are the unpragmatic things they cling on to. Invariably, when a full-fledged man with a healthy ego marries a misguided woman with such mentality, it is only a matter of time before the marriage collapses.

Gbam! True talk!
Re: Who Is To Blame For Broken Marriages, Man Or Woman? by ibedun: 6:13pm On Dec 30, 2010
Unrealistic expectations from both sides - thats usually the problem.

And couples should start understanding that marriage is infact a contract.  A contract to love, look after each other and maybe start a family.

Marriage does not mean or confer ownership and control. If your wife becomes too dominant or unfaithful or selfish or uncaring (and husbands too by the way) then it is the terms of the contract that is being broken. You either accept it by staying or reject it by getting a divorce.

And please in today's world a divorce is not a bad thing. It allows both parties to reassess their lives and to seek happiness and fulfilment elsewhere.

I have never come across a man or a woman who changes after marriage. The same behaviours would have been displayed but most people are too loved-up to see it and even when they see it sometimes they shrugg it off hoping that oh! she or he will change.  A dominant / Lazy / Promiscuous/ gold digger / aggressive or whatever will always remain the same person.

FAULT - Both!

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