I've always loved driving. The feel of the engine beneath me as I rev towards my destination, the AC in my hair, the sound system blasting my favourite jam ,all these makes it something I look forward to...

In the States I meant. In Nigeria it's nightmarish. Well since I came home I've mastered some skills and I hope you will learn a thing or two. Enjoy

1. Be bold. Have no fear brotherly. When you drive zero your mind. Especially in holdups. Once you're scared dem go just dey pass you any how. Enter any vehicle front. Don't trafficate before you do else they won't allow you. Gbori wole nothing do you.

2. Put your brake oil near you. Dem must kiss your car. E sure me die. If na small scratch just wipe am and move on.

3. Update your swear dictionary. Add ogun go kee you, thunder fire you, iyalaya e and the likes to your dictionary. Trust me you will need it. For in Lagos silence makes you a fool. If you are too butty and can't shout just wide your five fingers give them waka. That will suffice.

4. Never wind down in go slows or holdups. You can be robbed. Boys are not smiling.

5. Update your playlist. If you are a Christian be ready to worship God for hours. If you're secular update. For marlians just put ladugbo mi on repeat. Holdup no dey go like that o. Have fun. For when you get home na sleep sure pass.

I would have written more but omo I tire. Feel free to add yours. Awo lor

Those Danfo brakes are one time.

MejiLoyon:
I've always loved driving. The feel of the engine beneath me as I rev towards my destination, the AC in my hair, the sound system blasting my favourite jam ,all these makes it something I look forward to... In the States I meant. In Nigeria it's nightmarish. Well since I came home I've mastered some skills and I hope you will learn a thing or two. Enjoy

1. Be bold. Have no fear brotherly. When you drive zero your mind. Especially in holdups. Once you're scared dem go just dey pass you any how. Enter any vehicle front. Don't trafficate before you do else they won't allow you. Gbori wole nothing do you
2. Put your brake oil near you. Dem must kiss your car. E sure me die. If na small scratch just wipe am and move on.
3. Update your swear dictionary. Add ogun go kee you, thunder fire you, iyalaya e and the likes to your dictionary. Trust me you will need it. For in Lagos silence makes you a fool. If you are too butty and can't shout just wide your five fingers give them waka. That will suffice.
4. Never wind down in go slows or holdups. You can be robbed. Boys are not smiling.
5. Update your playlist. If you are a Christian be ready to worship God for hours. If you're secular update. For marlians just put ladugbo mi on repeat. Holdup no dey go like that o. Have fun. For when you get home na sleep sure pass.

I would have written more but omo I tire. Feel free to add yours. Awo lor

Every lagosian is naturally mad, zero joy

spyglaxx:
Those Danfo brakes are one time.

Those brakes are one time indeed

I can relate to the OP’s thoughts. Drive in Lagos, drive anywhere in the world.

MejiLoyon:
I've always loved driving. The feel of the engine beneath me as I rev towards my destination, the AC in my hair, the sound system blasting my favourite jam ,all these makes it something I look forward to... In the States I meant. In Nigeria it's nightmarish. Well since I came home I've mastered some skills and I hope you will learn a thing or two. Enjoy

1. Be bold. Have no fear brotherly. When you drive zero your mind. Especially in holdups. Once you're scared dem go just dey pass you any how. Enter any vehicle front. Don't trafficate before you do else they won't allow you. Gbori wole nothing do you
2. Put your brake oil near you. Dem must kiss your car. E sure me die. If na small scratch just wipe am and move on.
3. Update your swear dictionary. Add ogun go kee you, thunder fire you, iyalaya e and the likes to your dictionary. Trust me you will need it. For in Lagos silence makes you a fool. If you are too butty and can't shout just wide your five fingers give them waka. That will suffice.
4. Never wind down in go slows or holdups. You can be robbed. Boys are not smiling.
5. Update your playlist. If you are a Christian be ready to worship God for hours. If you're secular update. For marlians just put ladugbo mi on repeat. Holdup no dey go like that o. Have fun. For when you get home na sleep sure pass.

I would have written more but omo I tire. Feel free to add yours. Awo lor

I can't just stop laughing

Don't forget to add "Airforce " sticker on your windscreen and a "koboko " on your dashboard.

This is how u be chasing anyone that comes to shalaye. I bet u, the rest will be history!


Speaking from experience as an ex uber driver!

Shellsploit:
Don't forget to add "Airforce " sticker on your windscreen and a "koboko " on your dashboard.

This is how u be chasing anyone that comes to shalaye. I bet u, the rest will be history!

Hehehe

Where's Lalasticlala sef.

nice one and straight to the point .........especially no 4, no go dey form super man, be smart, Lagos is a no man' s land

Fayawo edition nko?

Lagos traffic no be here...if you be learner...you go hear wiiii ontop road matterx

Ok

Having a car in Lagos is a waste. Abuja is where you ride and enjoy your wheels

Richdad

(◔‿◔) Lagos State,there is always traffic,where is our road safety.

LAGOS NA E OWN COUNTRY

IF YOU NO BE STREET YOU NO FIT SURVIVE FOR MAINLAND

98% of lag drivers are mad.

It's association of mad people. Survival of the fittest. Jungle. That's Lagos traffic, with drivers jaw to jaw and shouting expletives.

Lol... In case of hold up and you wan cut corners, follow a danfo wey get Pasuma sticker

Mshewww

Verdict: No 3 seems to be a sprit, if you never sabi am you never dey drive be that... You Hear things like.
*na women she be, women dey drive like goat.
* car owner comot there make bus enter.
* Ozuo, na so your mate dey drive.
* Ogun go kill you.
*Old papa nor enter o make I nor scatter your motor for you.
* Go kill yourself mad man....


Crazy things, funny enough after leaving there they forget everything...


A united youth is an unstoppable force.

Shellsploit:
Don't forget to add "Airforce " sticker on your windscreen and a "koboko " on your dashboard.

This is how u be chasing anyone that comes to shalaye. I bet u, the rest will be history!

Lol

Half of motorist in Lagos deserves strokes of cane as warning notice before they hit the road.
Private cars drivers:5 strokes.
Logistic Okada:7 strokes.
Security escorts:12 strokes
Danfo drivers :25 strokes...

Only the Yellow Taxi should be pardon.

Weyrey lo le gbe Eko.

And the Deputy governor's security escort should be given 800 strokes daily.

Werey drivers full Lagos ah swear! Mad place to drive though it's always fun

Woos mtiuuuuuu.

Lagos and traffic are inseparable..dem be 5 & 6