So much negative stuff out there about Mother's in Law.
If we don't do anything we will soon be burnt on the stakes a cussed of controling and withchcraft and so much more

This video is the best poosible advice for dealing with a daughter in law...
Suscribe to get other videos and to support an old Nairalander

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QkQ2a_3mB4g

Just be a happy woman. No one will run from you!

The lady above me has said it all, just be good and people will be attracted to you....

Saintmary:
Just be a happy woman. No one will run from you!

Then you are assuming some daughters in law are not 'evil'.

Respect your in-laws. That's the major rule

mutter:
So much negative stuff out there about Mother's in Law.
If we don't do anything we will soon be burnt on the stakes a cussed of controling and withchcraft and so much more

This video is the best poosible advice for dealing with a daughter in law...
Suscribe to get other videos and to support an old Nairalander

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QkQ2a_3mB4g

Fantastic piece.

I laughed at mind your business three times.

The Empathy and Sympathy part is also key.

Would you consider doing a piece on how a woman should live her life so she is not dependent in her kids for emotional support in old age?

I find that women who lived full lives with their husbands, kids, careers/own stuff are less prone to the whole MIL/DIL drama.

They have other stuff to do and they have managed to build emotional reservoirs outside their kids.

bukatyne:


Fantastic piece.

I laughed at mind your business three times.

The Empathy and Sympathy part is also key.

Would you consider doing a piece on how a woman should live her life so she is not dependent in her kids for emotional support in old age?

I don't think that is even possible.
A mother will always be emotionally tied to her child. The best that is expected of her is not to be too selfish, other than that will be asking for too much of her.
You don't expect a mother to just emotionally detach from her child simply because he or she got married do you? To a mother, her child will always be her child.
If she's not dependent on her children for emotional support when she gets old, then who is she going to depend on?
Infact, the older they get, the more emotionally attached to their children they are.
What then is her gain in giving birth to her child/children only to have to "give them up" emotionally when they get older?

I find that women who lived full lives with their husbands, kids, careers/own stuff are less prone to the whole MIL/DIL drama.

They have other stuff to do and they have managed to build emotional reservoirs outside their kids.

Not necessarily true.
That initial war of who has more rights over the man will almost always play out, until they come to that understanding that each has their own place in the life of that man that they both should respect.

bukatyne:


Fantastic piece.

I laughed at mind your business three times.

The Empathy and Sympathy part is also key.

Would you consider doing a piece on how a woman should live her life so she is not dependent in her kids for emotional support in old age?

I find that women who lived full lives with their husbands, kids, careers/own stuff are less prone to the whole MIL/DIL drama.

They have other stuff to do and they have managed to build emotional reservoirs outside their kids.

You are absolutely correct with that assumption.
Assuming no issues like I'll health, loss of loved ones and the like occur.
But as you get older you start getting dependent on people.
Part two will soon be uploaded.. Advice to daughters in law.
I think they need to understand that their husband's don't divorce their mothers to marry them.

bukatyne:


Then you are assuming some daughters in law are not 'evil'.

Be good first, then be watchful.

bukatyne:


Fantastic piece.

I laughed at mind your business three times.

The Empathy and Sympathy part is also key.

Would you consider doing a piece on how a woman should live her life so she is not dependent in her kids for emotional support in old age?

I find that women who lived full lives with their husbands, kids, careers/own stuff are less prone to the whole MIL/DIL drama.

They have other stuff to do and they have managed to build emotional reservoirs outside their kids.

Women who are busy have less time for drama.

My mum is very busy with herself that she hardly visits any of us except Omugwo. As she is coming she is telling you her departure date which will never exceed 3 weeks.

I like her style and will adopt it cos she says she doesn't have strength for anybodys drama or Dil/sil gossips.If you miss her so much come and visit her.

Th rest is that there is peace for everyone.
Most of all these brouhaha stems from one party
claiming over interference.

Mariangeles:


[s]I don't think that is even possible.
A mother will always be emotionally tied to her child. The best that is expected of her is not to be too selfish, other than that will be asking for too much of her.
You don't expect a mother to just emotionally detach from her child simply because he or she got married do you? To a mother, her child will always be her child.
If she's not dependent on her children for emotional support when she gets old, then who is she going to depend on?
Infact, the older they get, the more emotionally attached to their children they are.
What then is her gain in giving birth to her child/children only to have to "give them up" emotionally when they get older?



Not necessarily true.
That initial war of who has more rights over the man will almost always play out, until they come to that understanding that each has their own place in the life of that man that they both should respect.[/s]

She is right, busy women hav no time 2 b jumpin 4rm one son’s house 2 another. She should be emotionally dependent on her husband. That is why u women should be productive in ur youth & marry good men, nt d type that will be commentin on every NL thread like d 1 above

[s]

EmperorMaria:


She is right, busy women hav no time 2 b jumpin 4rm one son’s house 2 another. She should be emotionally dependent on her husband. That is why u women should be productive in ur youth & marry good men, nt d type that will be commentin on every NL thread like d 1 above

[/s]

Haven't I warned you to stay on your lane and mind your damn business?
What is your obsession with my monicker you this irrelevant simpleton?

I na pu ara?
Ara ochaga gi?
Onwere ihe jikoro mu na gi?

What's with the constant mentions?
You dey mad?
I send you?
Wetin konsine me with your nonsense opinion?
E be like say I don follow you laff and shine teeth too much na im dey cause all dis nonsense...you better give yourself brain because I no go tolerate all dis your nonsense stalking crap you dis bastârd!

LadySarah:


Women who are busy have less time for drama.

My mum is very busy with herself that she hardly visits any of us except Omugwo. As she is coming she is telling you her departure date which will never exceed 3 weeks.

I like her style and will adopt it cos she says she doesn't have strength for anybodys drama or Dil/sil gossips.If you miss her so much come and visit her.

Th rest is that there is peace for everyone.
Most of all these brouhaha stems from one party
claiming over interference.

@Bold, true.

mutter:

You are absolutely correct with that assumption.
Assuming no issues like I'll health, loss of loved ones and the like occur.
But as you get older you start getting dependent on people.
Part two will soon be uploaded.. Advice to daughters in law.
I think they need to understand that their husband's don't divorce their mothers to marry them.

Ok, drop here.

@Mariangeles: A woman/man is not to depend on their children for emotional fulfillment, that is one of the markers of a failed/absent relationship with the spouse.

Have you thought that you don't have MIL/Son-in-law issues; does it mean mothers don't invest in their daughters to start boundary sharing in her martial home?

LadySarah:


Women who are busy have less time for drama.

My mum is very busy with herself that she hardly visits any of us except Omugwo. As she is coming she is telling you her departure date which will never exceed 3 weeks.

I like her style and will adopt it cos she says she doesn't have strength for anybodys drama or Dil/sil gossips.If you miss her so much come and visit her.

Th rest is that there is peace for everyone.
Most of all these brouhaha stems from one party
claiming over interference.

I understand u completely, but when she's old and gradually getting decrease in strength nko, bcuz we all pray for that old age but with good health as well

LadySarah:


Women who are busy have less time for drama.

My mum is very busy with herself that she hardly visits any of us except Omugwo. As she is coming she is telling you her departure date which will never exceed 3 weeks.

I like her style and will adopt it cos she says she doesn't have strength for anybodys drama or Dil/sil gossips.If you miss her so much come and visit her.

Th rest is that there is peace for everyone.
Most of all these brouhaha stems from one party
claiming over interference.

So true, my mum will come for omugwo, after like 2weeks, she will start counting the money she has missed from her shop and how been idle makes her sick.She will even complain that her husband (my father) has been starving since she came for this omugwo and how she is the only one that can cook his best meal.You will have to beg her to stay 3weeks sef.

Oizee:
I understand u completely, but when she's old and gradually getting decrease in strength nko, bcuz we all pray for that old age but with good health as well

Yes pls. Everyone is will grow old. It is wickedness to not take care of them.

Mariangeles:


I don't think that is even possible.
A mother will always be emotionally tied to her child. The best that is expected of her is not to be too selfish, other than that will be asking for too much of her.
You don't expect a mother to just emotionally detach from her child simply because he or she got married do you? To a mother, her child will always be her child.
If she's not dependent on her children for emotional support when she gets old, then who is she going to depend on?
Infact, the older they get, the more emotionally attached to their children they are.
What then is her gain in giving birth to her child/children only to have to "give them up" emotionally when they get older?

The ones who built their whole lives around their children will refuse to detach themselves and give them space to live their own lives. But the ones who had other interests aside the children tend to give them space when the time comes because they have their lives outside their children.

For some women, once children start coming in, they direct all their focus on them, even the husband remains at the background.

When the children start leaving home and getting married, there's hardly a strong bond with their husbands and they keep packing their loads to go and stay with their children and cause trouble in the process.