You just refuse to accept that there are lots of unreasonable people out there that purports to be friends. The fact still remains that you cannot satisfy everyone and you work damn hard for the money and sometimes you have to make tough choices even if it is to disappoint your immediate family like mums, sister, cousins etc.

Who said people are dropping their friends as soon as they get to the UK? How long have you been in the UK if you dont mind telling us.

What is stingy in your view? Did you read about the guy whos friend wants a presonalised Arsenal shirt - what for? You can get a copy in Nigeria anyway and how many friends is he supposed to send such expensive things to. If you are in Nigeria people dont come asking for all sorts of things, why the difference?

Dude, forget about location.

I refuse to accept it, surely. .cos if they are unreasonable
the person cannot be my friend in the first place.

That aside, family, i will only accept in this case
because some families are a bunch of unreasonable sods
what a pity that we have no choice in this matter.

I dont see whats the big deal in a customized shirt
people do that all the time, if you cant, you tell
them so, 1f you can , and you dont, you are stingy
any reasonable person would understand the former.<back to my first point>

Come on! You are just being awkward now. So you accept that familied can be unreasonable so can friends. Just because someone is unreasonable does not mean they automatically stop being your friend. It is like one of those arguments that people say that if you love someone then you cannot do this and that to them, humans are very complex.

You should have read the post of the guy who said he had gone to slave all day for someone to ask for something which is more expensive than his day'si wage, and it is just a frivilous request.

Anyway, why do people in the UK have to go through talking about money and haven't to say I can and cannot do this and that. It is just annoying that one has to always justify oneself and even appease those people causing one a headache. And if it is just one friend then fair enough but friends, family and relations and others - it can get too much

You have managed to drag this thing longer than i expected. lol

I accept family, because they are really all you got, so why offend them over
a lousy customized shirt, or some money. They probably say you are stingy
cause in denying them, you offer up no explanation.

Thank God for choice! and the friends you can choose!,
i still cannot imagine, my friends demanding for stuff
infact i am laughing over the thought.

But some of you are unreasonable o,

My 3 month in uk, i got a call from friend of mine. Was requesting i send her a laptop. Ok, i asked her if she had internet in her house. To my surprise, she said no. She said she would take it 2 the cafe and use the internet facility, people, what’s the point.

Is internet the only point of having a laptop, you are stingy.

Anyway, why do people in the UK have to go through talking about money and haven't to say I can and cannot do this and that. It is just annoying that one has to always justify oneself and even appease those people causing one a headache. And if it is just one friend then fair enough but friends, family and relations and others - it can get too much

Depends on the family you have and the company you keep
Most people here see the UK, London especially as Nigeria's 37th and richest state
And no matter what you make, 1 pound = N270

Gamine ,

so u telling me is reasonable 2 ask a friend just 3 months 2 his studies in UK 2 send u a laptop?

haba, b honest .

i think its not only unreasonable but irresponsible and wicked.

drnonye:

Gamine ,

so u telling me is reasonable 2 ask a friend just 3 months 2 his studies in UK 2 send u a laptop?

haba, b honest .

i think its not only unreasonable but irresponsible and wicked.

so so so so so so funny, I love NL

@Drnonye

I blame you for having such a friend,
On the other hand, why didnt you offer up
a better excuse than, 'Do you have internet?' as in are you frickin kidding me

Gamine ,
tell me, what would u have said 2 her?

i believe i was very polite. just 3 months!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, in a new country and she wants a laptop. Na me b her father?

did she even care if i had a job , paid my fees etc   

lets not pretend like we dont know the picture folks back home have of UK. that's the motivation behind the unreasonable  demands and if we say we dont have, they sing the same old song 'Nigerians In The UK Are So Stingy'.

drnonye:

Gamine ,
tell me, what would u have said 2 her?

Men, no long thing abegi, I would have simply used the popular Yoruba phrase: "Ko easy man"! "Ako nfa gburu ni JD yi ni man"!! , trust me, it works all the time for friends o!

Allta

bro, wetin "Ko easy man"! "Ako nfa gburu ni JD yi ni man"!! mean?

i dont want 2 say it 2 some1 and the person gets offended.

To be honest with you, I really dont want to offer anybody any explanation. E.g, I could have said I dont even have a laptop because I use the computers at college and local library but why bother entertaining such an unreasonable request on a monthly or so basis ore that I collect rain water to save on water bills or because I am simply eco-friendly and dont believe in waste and I am baba ijebu,

Blame people for having such friends. It appears that this fellow gam? has friends that are loaded or very content or perhaps he is not working hard enough for his money e.g a 419er or politician's/rich man kid. An Arsenal's shirt costing £55 is too expensive even to send to a family member when one is struggling and putting many layers on to keep the cold at bay.

I'll will rather give someone £500 to do something worthwhile than to buy them a £35 perfume/after shave - is it perfume they will eat or what is the real use of an Arsenal shirt for example.

Anyways, off to Nija 2morrow bearing gifts for the undeserving, as usual!

chris_j

safe trip bro

@drnonye

"Ko easy man" means "It's not Easy Man"
"Ako nfa gburu ni JD yi ni man" means "We just dey struggle for this JD Man"

It might only work for Yoruba dudes though, not sure what Igbo and Hausa peeps say to their peeps when things aren't easy in JD.

Ha! I almost forget,
@ Chris_j, safe journey, hope say those bad kidnapper boys no dey NL sha, I beg o, carry two eyes for front like crab for Naija o! Watch you back Bro

@Chris J

Abeg buy me laptop come
my number. . . holla when you arrive

hahahahahahaa

haba Gamine,   chris-J arrange her Laptop abeg. 

gudnite folks

I heard the tax they pay is high.

trust me it aint easy here in d uk, am a student but i knw wat my mum goes thru, all d money u earn iether goes to tax or bills, d bills jst keep coming trust me, and d truth is pple in 9ja fink money grows on trees here in uk, its freaking annoying, i only talk 2 my frends in 9ja on facebook , wen am always winging abt buyin credit for my phone 2 talk 2 d ones in uk talkless in 9ja, geez, dey need 2 give us a break man 4 real. :

Hey poster, trust me, me i dey call Naija well o.

But one thing is that, there are lots of bills to pay.

skfa1 ,

      like?

ok, i remember, NEPA

well,it is not other way easy when u step out of d country

its not their fault, you know. i spent few months there and discovered things are'nt that rosey there, except for the proffessionals i mean nurses,doctors and so on. most naija's there are either criminals or 'area boys'.

xreal,

so i take it that ur friends in uk are either criminals or 'area boys'.

remember the old say, 'show me your friends and i will tell u who u r'

get a life bro

gudluck

Wey Chris j and my laptop??, see scam o

Did anyone mention the word "scam" here?

chris_j is back safely in the UK. No kidnappers in my village in Ijebuland - thank god. I spent every last penny bar my taxi fare back to my house in UK. Even last day, brother got into trouble with touts and local govt officials who just ask for stupid papers every time he crossed into a new local govt - heavy bribery and time wasting on my last day and I struggled to get to airport because of the wahala.

Nija na wa o! But it was a unique experience and lots of talking points but the country is not going forward for the ordinary folks and the education system is in paralysis - real SHAME!!! Politicians earning money like PL footballers and their wives and local govt official carrying money dividing money meant for public services and carrying them around in Ghana-must-go (shopping bags),

A brother on the same flight had to cut his time short in the East of Nja because he almost got kidnapped,
Nigeria needs help! Not the sort of stupid prayers people are offering - God must be taking his time with us because we are not sincere despite all the churches. Nigeria has to have the most churches of diffrerent types and persuation in the whole world.

I need a break to recover from this holiday

I see.

Nigeria is that bad eh, Stingy people!

Did I actually say that Nigeria is bad or things were bad for me in Nigeria? Nigeria is a hell-hole for some people and those people are not even those in the rural areas with no electricity or piped borne water (save for poor medical help but herbalism can help). I enjoyed my rural almost back to basics holiday - I enjoyed eating fruits and veg and roots from the yard and getting stuck into hard work/farming. But I miss the electricity, light and cold water - and the lack of power made things more expensive all-round.

Those that think they are winging it in places like Lagos are the real sufferers.

So it is OK that people are being kidnapped and students did not pass out last year and those of this year have not been able to start

Nigeria could be so much better in every single way - we are so below par in terms of overall progress compared to our GDP and people power and education.

Water is being done in my little town/village with World Bank money whereas 30 years ago there was actually piped-borne water already. People now have to invest in bore holes and generators whereas theses services were there even in my grandads' days. Nepa will not set up eletricity poles but expect householders to go and buy the poles; and if you se the shocking nature of some thin poles and termite-ridden and wind swept poles - shocking!

I went to Nja to spend money and you still say stingy - giving small gifts, some money and services/labour gave me more pleasure than those times I whenI send money from UK

This is so funny. First, I appreciate Elgaxton frankness, knowing fully well the crucifixion fellow nigerians would do to him. There is some truth to what he said but does not mean he is justified. Also, most of the respondents to Elgaxton's plight are also correct but not justified. Its a case of the two sides of the same coin - it depends on which side you looking.
From the point of view of the UK friends:
1. If you take all the naira you have and come to the UK, you have the odds stacked against you at 260 to 1 (Go figure).
2. Only when you get to a modern society like the UK, that you realize that time means everything. Everything is done by the minute - class lectures, train departure, doctor's appointment, job interview - you try african time and u're screwed. You would lose ur cleaner job if u resume late thinking its looked down upon. Honestly, you really dont have time to phone a friend unless the person is among the three that count (everyone's got the best three).
3. You also develop an amateur sense of financial planning and management. Really, its hard to include Bolaji, Uche and Mahmoud in my monthly budget when I have HMRC, BT, Underground, National Express, British Gas, ASDA , even ordinary Primark to worry about.
In Elgaxton's defence:
No matter the challenges of living in the UK, the true worth of friendship depends on the sacrifices you can make. An occasional call back from the UK to Elgaxton, would say he means a lot to you (So, El gee, don't expect to many. You can be sweet but really how many of your friends do you "mean so much to"? Only one or two should be in the UK, the remaining one should be there with you in naija).

I told a friend last week that if a naija man go to his bank and his account balance is #1trillion.
He will call his friend in London and say this is my last credit,please call me.
And if friend called back, he want just £100.

rotflmao