Hmmm... Sorry story but truth be told, women are mostly the reason why a man would suddenly change and start to think of an alternative.

Many men wouldn't consider to take a second wife but their wives attitude and behaviours are the reasons they feel pressed to consider this.

Women will go to the mountain and do all manner of things to get a man hooked in the sham called marriage and when they eventually succeeds, they feel there is no need to build the home with the man, sad!

You cannot be stressing your husband and expect him to endure your bad attitude and character all the days of his life in the name of marriage. Nigerian women are so fond of this.

It's alot of logistics for a man to singlehandedly take 3 children away from their mother and take care of them in a Faraway country. This shows you are not a role model and can't be trusted with proper upbringing of your kids. It's not enough to just open your legs and have kids, you also need to be that pillar of care and a role model to your children.


What stops you from buying your own ticket to the UK and meet your husband since you're both responsible for your kids? If you like, listen to the left people encouragingly you to go to the embassy and report, if you eventually succeed at deporting your husband, he'll return with your kids to this Shithole and marry you.


To all aspiring mum out there, having kids in marriage is just a normal thing as even a goat can have kids. Support your husband and build with him, love and respect him and etc. All these doesn't cost you a thing....

Madam, go and seek the face of God in prayer and ask him to forgive you cos obviously, you've touched your husband at the deepest part the reason he did what he did.....


Talking from experience....�

Slurity:
It's a pity he do to you what you ALWAYS threaten to do to him. Pray for them and move on with your life. Your children will surely come back for you. Don't do anything that will make authorities deport or deal with him and the children. Consider your children with him

it's bad what the man did, but most times women think they have the monopoly of crime to abscond with children. Most always threaten to abscond with kids, don't know why they do such.

PedroEastman:
Let me tell you my life story, last year I was on my 6 months IT in Warri refinery where my Dad is a staff, my mom died when I was 6 and I have 3 younger siblings (step brother and sisters but you won’t notice because of the love we have for each other) . But unfortunately there mom and my Dad had to part ways because she couldn’t leave her business in port harcourt to base in Warri when my Dad was transferred there. So since my younger ones were still tender my Dad remarried a Warri woman but before the marriage she was nice and supportive but the moment she was married she started acting up and misbehaving. My Dad gave her a check of 1million in my presence to open a business close to the house and stock it very well but instead she opened a beer parlor after assuring my Dad she will open a provision shop and stock it like a mini supermarket. Fast forward to 4 years and she was still into the beer business and she closes late like 10pm after leaving home in the morning by 8 after my Dad leaves with me for IT by 7am but my Dad closes by 12 just to come hope and cook for my siblings because according to my step mom she was too busy with her business to cook. I kept wondering why my Dad is patiently cooking and not complaining about her considering the fact that he is hot tempered .


I never knew my Dad has a plan already coincidentally his retirement and my end of IT was in same month.

After I completed my IT my Dad retired but kept mute and she didn’t know he had retired and he even cooks and drive to her beer parlor to give her where she will be sitting and laughing with different men.

I had already finished my IT and my Dad retired too but we keep dressing every morning and and going out as usual as if we were going to our place of work then I never knew my Dad’s plan until he drove me somewhere in NNPC club where we got drinking, I drink a lot but my dad thought I was innocent to to him he is the first person to give me alcohol , mind you i was 23 years then. And drinking our beer he made one last call and all I heard was wait for me outside Refinery gate and he drove there lo and behold a very big truck that can be used to carry relieve material for displaced people. He drove ahead while the truck driver drove behind. We went straight to my siblings school and picked them up then we headed home where we packed everything and drove immediately to ph ( Eleme ). It was around 11pm she started calling and when we were already in our house but my Dad ordered my not to pick and he didn’t pick too .

For The 1million my Dad gave her to start the business she never for 1 days cook from it , even when my dad traveled and the money he dropped was exhausted she made us drink garri even when I had made millions and when my Dad asked why we had to sip garri as food her response was it’s a man’s responsibility to take care of the family not hers.



My reason for writing this long episode is just to let the OP know that a man can not just run with his children if you have not done anything to made feel you’re no more worthy.


I know my writing is not arranged but I just wanted to make a point[color=#990000][/color]

Wow, what an intriguing story....

muonemeleviw:
Sharp Man, Search urself imagine a woman telling her husband that she will leave with the kids.

That was a very Big joke on her part, even did it frequently according to her. That alone made her husband to declare mission impossible ghost protocol before she does it before him.

First of all
The man can bring the kids over to the UK as their biological father also if he can prove neglect from the mother side.... and frankly as a mother 3 children and you had no idea girllll take several seats ...

There is no way absolutely no way he can get 3 passports without you knowing ... apply for visa which is another process where he will have to take the kids to the embassy also if he truly is in the UK do you think border force are like naija police Girl ... you know your story aint right ..

Also he took 3 kids very rare for an irresponsible man to take his children! It's usually the opposite ...

I'm just saying make it make sense please ....
Any mother will get that there is no way he can take 3 kids ... you must have checked out of that marriage and if that's the case some level of neglect which will cost you your kids ....

Eat a fucking dick . You may be worse than the person in question

Zzor:
For the man to have done that, you must be a bad wife and him taking the children along means he's a good and responsible man who loves his family, I hate women who treats Good men badly.

TemiBami2020:
Pls help me people. My world is collapsing. It's a marriage of 10years and blessed with 3kids (2 boys and a girl). Like every other marriages, we've had our own shares of ups and downs. No marriage is perfect.

Last month i went to work. By the time I came back the children were no where to be found, including my husband. Initially, I thought they went out or something. Around 11pm I got worried and called my brother in-law who is a police to track my husband numbers

He contacted other family members and he found out my husband left for UK with our children forever.

I don't know what to do. I'm running mad. Pls is there any authority I can contact in the UK? Or can I go to the UK/ British Commission in Nigeria to lay a formal complaint? Is there any NGO I can contact?


Modified For those saying I'm a bad wife, I'm not. I've been very supportive in a every way a wife can be. I've lived in both physical and verbal abusive marriage within the last 10years of my life. He's a violent man, adulterous, alcoholic and a fervent smoker. He gets drunk and get home and beat me up Infront of the children unprovoked. I have evidences and witnesses

I often threaten him I would take my children and go away cause I can't watch and allow them to grow in such a toxic home.

even if he is a drunk etc he can't just wake up and take the children away for no reason. You don't threaten a man that you would take his children away from him, if I was the man and I hear that from you I might make that make before you attmept it.

Be sure that they are in UK

Like someone said get a human right lawyer and contact the police, media houses, I don't know much about this but just try.

But you started what might have prompted him to take the children away and if truly he is guilty of all those toxicity he is also at fault but you prompted the abduction or whatever.

Zzor:
For the man to have done that, you must be a bad wife and him taking the children along means he's a good and responsible man who loves his family, I hate women who treats Good men badly.

honestly this is the first time you have ever spoken sense on nairaland.,2021 must be a good year 4 all of us & may oluwa double ur hussle..i love you but think twice oo b4 u love me back..am a red piller not a simp just joking !

humilitypays:
how well a mother was she A bad wife can never be a good mother




You Naija ladies of today need to improve. You sounding like you based in the UK, hope u no follow

Even if he wanted to take the kids, there is due process. He should apply for custody in courts. Follow due process.

Openbusiness:
Guy those evening newspapers gang need new members na, to keep their inflated balloon ego afloat to carry the load of sadness, bitterness and frustration and loneliness hanging on their necks. When they see a happily married woman, they are not happy. How dare she have a husband that she submits to? When they see a marriage with issues, they jump out like a pack of hungry wolves ready to help their new prospective recruit tear whatever is left of her marriage into pieces so she can join their club of frustrated man-haters.

They can't get a man, and even if they get one, they can't keep him cuz they are toxic mannerless low IQ females, so everyone else must suffer and be blamed for it. As if we send u msg. All the married women out there that have a man to call the head of their home, may God continue to bless your union and make your bond stronger and give you more wisdom to understand and appreciate your man as the head of your family and know your role as his deputy, not Co-captain, not 2nd President but DEPUTY. Una go dey love oh ,

Don't mind all these frustrated ones that call themselves evening newspapers, they will be more than happy to help you destroy your marriage

What are you talking about? It’s your type that will not let his wife sit in the living room with him, just to prove that he is the boss. I have no business with your likes, now shift.

InvertedHammer:

/
She is volunteering to help while infact she is planning to throw fuel into the fire. Such toxic women search out for others to lead astray. Let her go ahead and work with the AdaNri1 of a lady. I give it 6 months and she will open another thread for lamentations.

/

Work with who? Did I inform you that I am jobless? I have seen how evil men like you maltreat women, and the most painful part of that domestic and psychological abuse is that you blame it in the victim.
If the woman refuses to take it you vilify her.
Insecure men who want to abuse women to prove their masculinity. May God deliver my daughters from you lot.

TemiBami2020:
Pls help me people. My world is collapsing. It's a marriage of 10years and blessed with 3kids (2 boys and a girl). Like every other marriages, we've had our own shares of ups and downs. No marriage is perfect.

Last month i went to work. By the time I came back the children were no where to be found, including my husband. Initially, I thought they went out or something. Around 11pm I got worried and called my brother in-law who is a police to track my husband numbers

He contacted other family members and he found out my husband left for UK with our children forever.

I don't know what to do. I'm running mad. Pls is there any authority I can contact in the UK? Or can I go to the UK/ British Commission in Nigeria to lay a formal complaint? Is there any NGO I can contact?


Modified For those saying I'm a bad wife, I'm not. I've been very supportive in a every way a wife can be. I've lived in both physical and verbal abusive marriage within the last 10years of my life. He's a violent man, adulterous, alcoholic and a fervent smoker. He gets drunk and get home and beat me up Infront of the children unprovoked. I have evidences and witnesses

I often threaten him I would take my children and go away cause I can't watch and allow them to grow in such a toxic home.

It's impossible for him to get Visa for them in embassy without your knowledge because they would ask questions about the mother. Another possibility is that he way tell them you are dead and presents a fake dead certificate

dejol88:

Abduction? How? For taking his biological kids? The only crime if any is if he forged any document and not abduction. How will you proof that in court?

First of all its ‘prove’.
Secondly, thank me for this legal education no matter how little, it might just save your ass from jail.
When a man and woman have kids, one party cannot just take them away without the consent of the other.
Doing so will land you in legal hot waters. First of the list of charges brought against you will be child abduction. Ok? I’m not here to fight anyone. Nigerian men don’t like a woman who says her mind. They like women who run mad or die in silence due to years of enduring an abusive marriage.

Many Nigerians are mentally deranged just imagine their comments .
Nigeria is one last place you should sake for advice .
Better kill yourself than asking Nigerians for a solution cos they will so much rubbish You.

I know pretty well that the kids will be deported as well. I am just amazed about some comments here.

What is she gonna gain if those poor kids are forcefully ejected out of UK with thier father?

I can bet it that the kids will never forgive her if she push for their deportation. The only way out of this is to resolve the couple's differences so that both of them can raise their kids together.

If I don't hear the husband's side of stories, I ain't gonna judge anyone

GboyegaD:


They will as well. The very reason why she should let him know before doing such so that they can have a discussion about the situation.

Gokoyer0:
I know pretty well that the kids will be deported as well. I am just amazed about some comments here.

What is she gonna gain if those poor kids are forcefully ejected out of UK with thier father?

I can bet it that the kids will never forgive her if she push for their deportation. The only way out of this is to resolve the couple's differences so that both of them can raise their kids together.

If I don't hear the husband's side of stories, I ain't gonna judge anyone

And how sure are you they will do well in the UK? It takes a home to raise good kids and for him to be able to take the kids without the wife knowing, there is a high tendency he is going to hustle. What that means is that he might not have enough time to raise the kids properly.

My take is "omo ta ti bi yi ma travel, a se ori re". No need to rush things.

It seems the craze for abroad has affected the thinking of some people. She should let 3 children go because they are in the UK? Very warped thinking.

Terrible people everywhere.

If they are deported, I think the marriage will be much more difficult to redeem. So what difference is that gonna make in the lives of the poor kids?
At the bolded, I can't really say anything about that.

GboyegaD:


And how she are you they will do well in the UK? It takes a home to raise good kids and for him to be able to take the kids without the wife knowing, there is a high tendency he is going to hustle. What does that mean is that he might not ha not have enough time to raise the kids properly.ve a good time

You yourself needs to calm down first, for the fact that you know they are fine wherever they are is good enough.
Take time to rest from all the trauma.

I would have blamed you a bit, but I LL let it pass.

For your hubby to travel out with the children without your knowledge shows he's been planning it for long.....that you have no idea about all these is quite amazing.


Becareful of your actions at the moment because if you force them back home(which you can do), what benefit if it going to be.
The best you can do right now is to get the contact of your husband and start pleading for forgiveness, just incase you have offended him.

I pray that the Lord will comfort you at this trying time and restore your family to you peacefully.

Trust God for them, everything will be fine.

Gokoyer0:
If they are deported, I think the marriage will be much more difficult to redeem. So what difference is that gonna make in the lives of the poor kids?
At the bolded, I can't really say anything about that.

This isn't as difficult if both are sincere with themselves. They could have a discussion and think of a resolve. He acted unfair to her and would likely have lied to get his documents. Most importantly, , location isn't the only key to success. He should reach out and, they should find a resolve.

authority2006:


It doesn't whether she replies that post or not, the husband was wrong to have done what he did. He is self centered, simple.

Yes, he is wrong if this story truly happened

AdaNri1:
You’re far too judgmental and this is just harsh and inappropriate. Always wait to hear the other side of the story.

You're also judgemental and there's no difference between you and her, cos your comment on the previous person you quoted proved that. You based your summation on your previous knowledge of something similar, hence you're also judgemental. A clear case of pot calling kettle black.

Righteousness2:


Is this a movie or For Real?

If it is For Real, Don't run mad.
Calm yourself down. Try all the Possible contacts you can to get Him on phone to know What really is on Ground.

Possibly make a Complaint to His Parents, the Nigerian police and the British Embassy.

Prayers will be your Main key in these times..

Prayers can control him and bring him back with your kids the same way he left.

Be Calm! Stay Calm!
Don't create tension for yourself..

busy body

NoToPile:
It seems the craze for abroad has affected the thinking of some people. She should let 3 children go because they are in the UK? Very warped thinking.

Terrible people everywhere.

it’s appalling

TemiBami2020:
Pls help me people. My world is collapsing. It's a marriage of 10years and blessed with 3kids (2 boys and a girl). Like every other marriages, we've had our own shares of ups and downs. No marriage is perfect.

Last month i went to work. By the time I came back the children were no where to be found, including my husband. Initially, I thought they went out or something. Around 11pm I got worried and called my brother in-law who is a police to track my husband numbers

He contacted other family members and he found out my husband left for UK with our children forever.

I don't know what to do. I'm running mad. Pls is there any authority I can contact in the UK? Or can I go to the UK/ British Commission in Nigeria to lay a formal complaint? Is there any NGO I can contact?


Modified For those saying I'm a bad wife, I'm not. I've been very supportive in a every way a wife can be. I've lived in both physical and verbal abusive marriage within the last 10years of my life. He's a violent man, adulterous, alcoholic and a fervent smoker. He gets drunk and get home and beat me up Infront of the children unprovoked. I have evidences and witnesses

I often threaten him I would take my children and go away cause I can't watch and allow them to grow in such a toxic home.

you threatening and he execute. Leave them, your children will find you when the time come, they've escape this Sithole country, don't force them back, you don't know what their destiny hold, as for your husband, he will come back begging you mark my word.

NoToPile:
It seems the craze for abroad has affected the thinking of some people. She should let 3 children go because they are in the UK? Very warped thinking.

Terrible people everywhere.

and you are very terrible here in Nigeria but you don't know,

NoToPile:
It seems the craze for abroad has affected the thinking of some people. She should let 3 children go because they are in the UK? Very warped thinking.

Terrible people everywhere.

and you are very terrible here in Nigeria but you don't know, if she can predict their destiny, how come she has no idea of the husband plans till they get to UK? She shouldn't tamper with her kids destiny and you can stay with your one Nigeria.

AdaNri1:
Work with who? Did I inform you that I am jobless? I have seen how evil men like you maltreat women, and the most painful part of that domestic and psychological abuse is that you blame it in the victim.
If the woman refuses to take it you vilify her.
Insecure men who want to abuse women to prove their masculinity. May God deliver my daughters from you lot.

/
Devil comes in both genders.

Toxic women believe only men are evil--a man is always the aggressor.

Yet we have had women who killed or ordered hits on their husbands. Is your husband still alive? If Yes, thank God. If no, what happened?

/

sunnyfats:
You yourself needs to calm down first, for the fact that you know they are fine wherever they are is good enough.
Take time to rest from all the trauma.

I would have blamed you a bit, but I LL let it pass.

For your hubby to travel out with the children without your knowledge shows he's been planning it for long.....that you have no idea about all these is quite amazing.


Becareful of your actions at the moment because if you force them back home(which you can do), what benefit if it going to be.
The best you can do right now is to get the contact of your husband and start pleading for forgiveness, just incase you have offended him.

I pray that the Lord will comfort you at this trying time and restore your family to you peacefully.

Trust God for them, everything will be fine.

women of this Era don’t apologies. They see it as let down.

AdaNri1:
First of all its ‘prove’.
Secondly, thank me for this legal education no matter how little, it might just save your ass from jail.
When a man and woman have kids, one party cannot just take them away without the consent of the other.
Doing so will land you in legal hot waters. First of the list of charges brought against you will be child abduction. Ok? I’m not here to fight anyone. Nigerian men don’t like a woman who says her mind. They like women who run mad or die in silence due to years of enduring an abusive marriage.

you just committee a fallacy....called Hasty generalization... don't say Nigeria men say some Nigerian men pls. and it also depends on The manner you express your mind.some women are verbally abusive

InvertedHammer:

/
Devil comes in both genders.

Toxic women believe only men are evil--a man is always the aggressor.

Yet we have had women who killed or ordered hits on their husbands. Is your husband still alive? If Yes, thank God. If no, what happened?

/

and some women are verbally abusive which causes men emotional trauma... infact some of this women are quick to shout foul

AdaNri1:
What are you talking about? It’s your type that will not let his wife sit in the living room with him, just to prove that he is the boss. I have no business with your likes, now shift.

You have no business with my likes, so why are you mentioning my comment on this thread, when I never even quoted you before? Your self-confusion is legendary. Do I look like a man that wants anything to do with your likes of ultrasensitive bitter super-nagging low-IQ confused triggered females? Definitely not me! I only relate with and appreciate decent, graceful, well-mannered, refined, classy, humble wise women with maturity who respect, honor and are loyal to their husbands and use their wisdom and good character to build their home and marriage, and not tear it apart like tissue paper. You're obviously not in that category of women, so what's my concern with you? And I'm not responsible for your heartbreaks so don't wail at me abeg.
(☞ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)☞ That's the way out of my mentions.