Defense attorney: will u tell us in ur own words, what happened the night of April 1st?

Old lady: there I was, sitting on my porch on a warm spring evening when a young man comes creeping up n sat down next to me.

Attorney: did u know him?

Old lady: No. But he was friendly.

Attorney: what happened after he sat down?

Ol'Lady: He rubbed my thigh.

Attorney: Did u stop him?

Old Lady: No.

Attorney: why not?

Old Lady: It felt good. No one has touched me since my albert died.

Attorney: What happened next?

Old lady: He began to rub my breasts.

Attorney: Did u stop him then?

Old lady: No

Attorney: Why not?

Old Lady: It made me feel alive n excited.I haven't felt like that in years!

Attorney: Nxt what?

Old lady: Well, by then I was all spicy n I laid down n told him take me, Take me now!

Attorney: did he take u?
Old lady: Hell no! he just yelled "april fool"! And that's when I shot the little bastard