I'm In Danger Of Committing Adultery - Please Advice Me (From The Inbox)

Someone sent me this and I got his permission to publish it anonymously. So, please, can we advise him on how to avoid infidelity under the circumstances narrated?

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"Please Sir, I need a mature and expert advice on this issue:

There's this girl I started having feelings for right from childhood (let me call her Julie). I remember one day I saw Julie after a Christmas church service while we were both kids (she was in the primary school while I was in junior secondary). As I saw her that day sitting on a mobile stool around the lawn area, she looked like a heavenly being to me. The memory has never left me after about 25 years perhaps.
But, being a child then, all my infatuation for Julie was all bottled up in me. Yes, I couldn't talk to her, although she's up to 5 years younger than me.

Now, fast-forward to my university years. I met Julie somewhere far from our town (where she was attending a high school). We began to get together (I don't mean sex). To my great delight, I noticed that Julie had also been nursing strong feelings for me. I used to be the talk of the town in my uni days. So, I believe it's why she got so deeply into me so fast.

It's a piece of experience I've never had again since then - I mean having a long-time crush crushing on me. But the joy didn't last long: I soon graduated from uni and was very madly in search of a good job. I even had to travel far away from my city in search of greener pasture. That was when someone came for Julie's hands in marriage (let's call him 'Jude').

Jude was a family friend who also confided a lot in me. Somehow, we (me and Julie) couldn't resist Jude's advances. I couldn't seem to betray a family friend (and, honestly, marriage was totally absent from my mind then). In fact, looking back now, I can see that it's the loophole Jude had taken advantage of - coupled with his connection to my family - to access Julie.

Long story short, Jude and Julie eventually got married. I refused to attend their wedding because I was afraid I would break down and cry and disgrace myself seeing Julie getting married to someone else. I also hoped to use that to annoy Julie, thereby breaking the emotional cord that linked us.

Did my trick work? No. It was actually counterproductive. See how:

One evening - about a year after their wedding - I received a phone call from an unknown number. It was Julie sobbing on phone, saying how she was missing me terribly, and asking how she offended me (since I was avoiding her, she meant). I had blocked her on the social media and on the phone because I didn't want anything to remind me of the pain of losing her. Please, remember, I was relatively immature even after graduating college because I wasn't experienced enough in such things - I was a noted book worm at college.

I can't remember how I survived Julie's heart accusing me on the phone that evening. But I remember telling her, "I feel like telling you I love you but I can't since there's already someone between us" - which she didn't take lightly.

Then, some days ago, I was on a dating platform (EDITOR: such as this) when I noticed it was Julie who sent me 'love' - like Facebook friend request. I accepted and we began to chat. She told me she's now a trained nurse working with a high-brow government hospital. But, she said she keeps feeling incomplete in her marriage and keeps feeling like having me around (she has up to 3 kids now and I've never had sex with her; so I can't quite understand such a saying).

Yet, what Julie said is not my main problem now. My main problem is that she has gotten me seriously thinking about her. Do you know that I've never really been able to fall in love with any other woman apart from Julie?

I remember the last time I dared to visit her after years of unsuccessfully trying to avoid her. Her husband wasn't around. I remember her clasping my hand discretely behind my car door when I was about to go. As I lifted my face involuntarily, my eyes met Julie's as she was looking me through and saying, "please, be coming around, I do miss you a lot".

My heart still skips every time I remember that. It's one reason I stopped visiting Julie in her matrimonial home. However, honestly, the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. Hence, my need for advice.
Thank you Sir."

Righteousness2:
Flee From Julie, the Strange woman with all the strength and Speed you can Muster.
Her lips drops like Honey but it will Destroy you.
Flee my Brother! Flee!

10mobile:

Please, you can try to give a practical advice instead of just preaching at him.

Righteousness2:
Flee From Julie, the Strange woman with all the strength and Speed you can Muster.
Her lips drops like Honey but it will Destroy you.
Flee my Brother! Flee!

Righteousness2:


Pleasw Who is holding u from giving him your "Pratical advice"?