ransomed:
The third leg in between your legs is seriously controlling you.
I put it to you that you will soon stop paying your children school fees and focus on her children.
Family and friends will soon be termed witches and wizards under your roof and instances will be given to you to confirm her claims.
She desperately needs a substitute and you are the perfect one sir.
Go ahead with her at your peril. The bitter truth is that you are being manipulated to dispatch anyone that will call you to order so that she can gain total control. Your life and family is under attack sir. Stop the Kpekus and let her return to her late husband's house.

family6644:
I need serious advise from experienced nairalanders, please forgive my lengthy message because it requires detailed explanations.

I lost my wife exactly 3 months ago, 4 years of relationship and 13 years of marriage with her before she passed on, she left behind 3kids, 13yr old girl 7yr and 3yr old boys. I understand marriages are full of their challenges but we have been through the journey and we came out victorious having a loving and happy home, a union other partners appreciates.

My late wife was so organized and we trainned my kids to be independent while she travels on local business trips. So I just needed to continue our family habit of buying and stocking everything at home while they manage themselves with the help of an older maid who has been part of the family for many years, in short, we are faring quite well as I continue to mourn my wife and carry on with life.

Here is the problem, from a lot of condolence messages coming in on my Facebook, I had the chance to reply some of them 2weeks ago, I met this single mother of two who invited my kids to her daughter's birthday party, i was reluctant but she said it is time to start taking the kids out since they are yet to resume school, exactly what they needed at that point was the usual outing which has been missing for a while since their mother's sickness and after her demise, approx 6months in total. She said it's not a loud party that she needed only my kids for the small sitting room party.

I decided, went to the party with the kids, it was fun for the kids, I have not seen them happy like that in a long while, it made me happy too, they fell in love with the two sisters and their mother all like a miracle, my little 3year old boy started calling her mommy, others follow and it all seem like a family reunion. We left late at night with her girls asking that they meet again the next day which was a Sunday. To cut it short, my kids and hers agreed to meet the next day except for me. To be honest, the lady is a nice and lovely person to be with, she's a realtor who can work from home, she's real and beautiful, she has been a single mother for 4yrs after her husband travelled out and abandoned them to marry another woman, that's according to her.

She called me that her kids could not allow her rest, they said if we can't come, she should bring them to our house, I mildly rejected but i was persuaded by my daughter and my first son to have them around, I could see that they have bonded quite well, I want my kids to be happy too, that's what I have always wanted for them so I agreed and gave them our address. To cut the story short, I find it impossible to separate the two families that has come together to become one, when they were leaving back to their house my kids pleaded with me to allow them go with mommy to her house, I understand that is real because she's lovely with kids. I had the confidence to trust my kids with someone for the first time in my life. They didn't want to come back, I had to go and pick them up the next day, all of them made sure they came back home with me, we started living together as a family and everyone was enjoying it.

It became an automatic affair with her, I was worried about it been too early, I had to involve few of my friends to seek opinions, some were happy that i could get a good mother for my kids this soon, others asked me to stop the family union and give it a little time to study her character. I suggested some space but she felt very bad, she thinks I am sending them away. I had to allow them stay while I use the opportunity to observe the new found love and family.

12days after, I realize that in a bid to reorganize me and help me to move ahead in life, she totally disregards anything that concerns my late wife whom I still hold dear to my heart, same as my daughter and my adopted daughter, I don't like to address her as a maid. We loved and cherished my late wife, everything she introduced seems to be strange to the norms of the family. If I try to raise my concerns for her to adjust, she will simply tell me that the dead is dead and I should just forget everything about her including whatever she stood for as a mother and wife.

If I try to talk some senses into her to make her understand that brooding over the dead is different from honouring and respecting the deseased, she gets really angry claiming I am comparing her with a dead person. Whatever she discovers as our way of doing things in the family she disregards it and replaces it with her own way without minding how we feel as a family or how easy or difficult it is for us to adjust.

It looks like we are the only ones tolerating and accommodating them here, I have tried with no avail to stop her from insulting the memory of my late wife. I discussed with each and everyone at home, they all wish I could perform a miracle to have them leave because no one can tolerate the mother and kids anymore, I am equally fed up myself and willing to take a break.

I have a friend who is aware of my problems with her, he told me that I am the problem here, he said it will be hard for any woman to fit into our family way of doing things and it will be difficult for us to cope with a different way of life introduced by another woman.

I hope I can get one or two advices that could help. I am quite confused

thebosstrevor1:


i dont believe in remarriage especially when i have kids

women will always find a way to want the best for their own kids

family6644:
I need serious advise from experienced nairalanders, please forgive my lengthy message because it requires detailed explanations.

I lost my wife exactly 3 months ago, 4 years of relationship and 13 years of marriage with her before she passed on, she left behind 3kids, 13yr old girl 7yr and 3yr old boys. I understand marriages are full of their challenges but we have been through the journey and we came out victorious having a loving and happy home, a union other partners appreciates.

My late wife was so organized and we trainned my kids to be independent while she travels on local business trips. So I just needed to continue our family habit of buying and stocking everything at home while they manage themselves with the help of an older maid who has been part of the family for many years, in short, we are faring quite well as I continue to mourn my wife and carry on with life.

Here is the problem, from a lot of condolence messages coming in on my Facebook, I had the chance to reply some of them 2weeks ago, I met this single mother of two who invited my kids to her daughter's birthday party, i was reluctant but she said it is time to start taking the kids out since they are yet to resume school, exactly what they needed at that point was the usual outing which has been missing for a while since their mother's sickness and after her demise, approx 6months in total. She said it's not a loud party that she needed only my kids for the small sitting room party.

I decided, went to the party with the kids, it was fun for the kids, I have not seen them happy like that in a long while, it made me happy too, they fell in love with the two sisters and their mother all like a miracle, my little 3year old boy started calling her mommy, others follow and it all seem like a family reunion. We left late at night with her girls asking that they meet again the next day which was a Sunday. To cut it short, my kids and hers agreed to meet the next day except for me. To be honest, the lady is a nice and lovely person to be with, she's a realtor who can work from home, she's real and beautiful, she has been a single mother for 4yrs after her husband travelled out and abandoned them to marry another woman, that's according to her.

She called me that her kids could not allow her rest, they said if we can't come, she should bring them to our house, I mildly rejected but i was persuaded by my daughter and my first son to have them around, I could see that they have bonded quite well, I want my kids to be happy too, that's what I have always wanted for them so I agreed and gave them our address. To cut the story short, I find it impossible to separate the two families that has come together to become one, when they were leaving back to their house my kids pleaded with me to allow them go with mommy to her house, I understand that is real because she's lovely with kids. I had the confidence to trust my kids with someone for the first time in my life. They didn't want to come back, I had to go and pick them up the next day, all of them made sure they came back home with me, we started living together as a family and everyone was enjoying it.

It became an automatic affair with her, I was worried about it been too early, I had to involve few of my friends to seek opinions, some were happy that i could get a good mother for my kids this soon, others asked me to stop the family union and give it a little time to study her character. I suggested some space but she felt very bad, she thinks I am sending them away. I had to allow them stay while I use the opportunity to observe the new found love and family.

12days after, I realize that in a bid to reorganize me and help me to move ahead in life, she totally disregards anything that concerns my late wife whom I still hold dear to my heart, same as my daughter and my adopted daughter, I don't like to address her as a maid. We loved and cherished my late wife, everything she introduced seems to be strange to the norms of the family. If I try to raise my concerns for her to adjust, she will simply tell me that the dead is dead and I should just forget everything about her including whatever she stood for as a mother and wife.

If I try to talk some senses into her to make her understand that brooding over the dead is different from honouring and respecting the deseased, she gets really angry claiming I am comparing her with a dead person. Whatever she discovers as our way of doing things in the family she disregards it and replaces it with her own way without minding how we feel as a family or how easy or difficult it is for us to adjust.

It looks like we are the only ones tolerating and accommodating them here, I have tried with no avail to stop her from insulting the memory of my late wife. I discussed with each and everyone at home, they all wish I could perform a miracle to have them leave because no one can tolerate the mother and kids anymore, I am equally fed up myself and willing to take a break.

I have a friend who is aware of my problems with her, he told me that I am the problem here, he said it will be hard for any woman to fit into our family way of doing things and it will be difficult for us to cope with a different way of life introduced by another woman.

I hope I can get one or two advices that could help. I am quite confused

Oga wait, what us she doing in your house? As wife or girlfriend? If is the latter she doesn't have any business staying with you guys. Dont create problem for your family. A jealous woman is more deadly than cancer.

klap4gbens:


Marry a single lady or young widow without a kid yet

mariahAngel:


Have nothing to do with that calculative/manipulative
woman!
She had everything planned out right from the start and you're the perfect candidate! You fell right into her trap!
She's been the one making all the major moves. (The birthday party was a perfect excuse to penetrate)
Imagine forcing you to move on from mourning your wife...
Have you had sex with her already?
Have you bothered to find out why her husband left her? Without caring about his children?
Oga, shine your eyes o! Your children don't know better...they just miss the care of a mother, which the woman seem to be taking advantage of.
You think you know her but you have no idea! None!

family6644:
I need serious advise from experienced nairalanders, please forgive my lengthy message because it requires detailed explanations.

I lost my wife exactly 3 months ago, 4 years of relationship and 13 years of marriage with her before she passed on, she left behind 3kids, 13yr old girl 7yr and 3yr old boys. I understand marriages are full of their challenges but we have been through the journey and we came out victorious having a loving and happy home, a union other partners appreciates.

My late wife was so organized and we trainned my kids to be independent while she travels on local business trips. So I just needed to continue our family habit of buying and stocking everything at home while they manage themselves with the help of an older maid who has been part of the family for many years, in short, we are faring quite well as I continue to mourn my wife and carry on with life.

Here is the problem, from a lot of condolence messages coming in on my Facebook, I had the chance to reply some of them 2weeks ago, I met this single mother of two who invited my kids to her daughter's birthday party, i was reluctant but she said it is time to start taking the kids out since they are yet to resume school, exactly what they needed at that point was the usual outing which has been missing for a while since their mother's sickness and after her demise, approx 6months in total. She said it's not a loud party that she needed only my kids for the small sitting room party.

I decided, went to the party with the kids, it was fun for the kids, I have not seen them happy like that in a long while, it made me happy too, they fell in love with the two sisters and their mother all like a miracle, my little 3year old boy started calling her mommy, others follow and it all seem like a family reunion. We left late at night with her girls asking that they meet again the next day which was a Sunday. To cut it short, my kids and hers agreed to meet the next day except for me. To be honest, the lady is a nice and lovely person to be with, she's a realtor who can work from home, she's real and beautiful, she has been a single mother for 4yrs after her husband travelled out and abandoned them to marry another woman, that's according to her.

She called me that her kids could not allow her rest, they said if we can't come, she should bring them to our house, I mildly rejected but i was persuaded by my daughter and my first son to have them around, I could see that they have bonded quite well, I want my kids to be happy too, that's what I have always wanted for them so I agreed and gave them our address. To cut the story short, I find it impossible to separate the two families that has come together to become one, when they were leaving back to their house my kids pleaded with me to allow them go with mommy to her house, I understand that is real because she's lovely with kids. I had the confidence to trust my kids with someone for the first time in my life. They didn't want to come back, I had to go and pick them up the next day, all of them made sure they came back home with me, we started living together as a family and everyone was enjoying it.

It became an automatic affair with her, I was worried about it been too early, I had to involve few of my friends to seek opinions, some were happy that i could get a good mother for my kids this soon, others asked me to stop the family union and give it a little time to study her character. I suggested some space but she felt very bad, she thinks I am sending them away. I had to allow them stay while I use the opportunity to observe the new found love and family.

12days after, I realize that in a bid to reorganize me and help me to move ahead in life, she totally disregards anything that concerns my late wife whom I still hold dear to my heart, same as my daughter and my adopted daughter, I don't like to address her as a maid. We loved and cherished my late wife, everything she introduced seems to be strange to the norms of the family. If I try to raise my concerns for her to adjust, she will simply tell me that the dead is dead and I should just forget everything about her including whatever she stood for as a mother and wife.

If I try to talk some senses into her to make her understand that brooding over the dead is different from honouring and respecting the deseased, she gets really angry claiming I am comparing her with a dead person. Whatever she discovers as our way of doing things in the family she disregards it and replaces it with her own way without minding how we feel as a family or how easy or difficult it is for us to adjust.

It looks like we are the only ones tolerating and accommodating them here, I have tried with no avail to stop her from insulting the memory of my late wife. I discussed with each and everyone at home, they all wish I could perform a miracle to have them leave because no one can tolerate the mother and kids anymore, I am equally fed up myself and willing to take a break.

I have a friend who is aware of my problems with her, he told me that I am the problem here, he said it will be hard for any woman to fit into our family way of doing things and it will be difficult for us to cope with a different way of life introduced by another woman.

I hope I can get one or two advices that could help. I am quite confused

thebosstrevor1:


they will want kids at the end and they will put the interest of their own kids first

i have seen this scenario times without number

better to have a side chick to satify your sexual needs than to marry for kids when you have kids to take care of at home.

Nickymezor:
Great advice. Spot on.My dad didn't remarry until we were all grown up. According to him my kids didn't know their mummy well, let them know their daddy well instead.Yeah we had relatives coming around/ we visiting dem as well during holidays.

family6644:
I need serious advise from experienced nairalanders, please forgive my lengthy message because it requires detailed explanations.

I lost my wife exactly 3 months ago, 4 years of relationship and 13 years of marriage with her before she passed on, she left behind 3kids, 13yr old girl 7yr and 3yr old boys. I understand marriages are full of their challenges but we have been through the journey and we came out victorious having a loving and happy home, a union other partners appreciates.

My late wife was so organized and we trainned my kids to be independent while she travels on local business trips. So I just needed to continue our family habit of buying and stocking everything at home while they manage themselves with the help of an older maid who has been part of the family for many years, in short, we are faring quite well as I continue to mourn my wife and carry on with life.

Here is the problem, from a lot of condolence messages coming in on my Facebook, I had the chance to reply some of them 2weeks ago, I met this single mother of two who invited my kids to her daughter's birthday party, i was reluctant but she said it is time to start taking the kids out since they are yet to resume school, exactly what they needed at that point was the usual outing which has been missing for a while since their mother's sickness and after her demise, approx 6months in total. She said it's not a loud party that she needed only my kids for the small sitting room party.

I decided, went to the party with the kids, it was fun for the kids, I have not seen them happy like that in a long while, it made me happy too, they fell in love with the two sisters and their mother all like a miracle, my little 3year old boy started calling her mommy, others follow and it all seem like a family reunion. We left late at night with her girls asking that they meet again the next day which was a Sunday. To cut it short, my kids and hers agreed to meet the next day except for me. To be honest, the lady is a nice and lovely person to be with, she's a realtor who can work from home, she's real and beautiful, she has been a single mother for 4yrs after her husband travelled out and abandoned them to marry another woman, that's according to her.

She called me that her kids could not allow her rest, they said if we can't come, she should bring them to our house, I mildly rejected but i was persuaded by my daughter and my first son to have them around, I could see that they have bonded quite well, I want my kids to be happy too, that's what I have always wanted for them so I agreed and gave them our address. To cut the story short, I find it impossible to separate the two families that has come together to become one, when they were leaving back to their house my kids pleaded with me to allow them go with mommy to her house, I understand that is real because she's lovely with kids. I had the confidence to trust my kids with someone for the first time in my life. They didn't want to come back, I had to go and pick them up the next day, all of them made sure they came back home with me, we started living together as a family and everyone was enjoying it.

It became an automatic affair with her, I was worried about it been too early, I had to involve few of my friends to seek opinions, some were happy that i could get a good mother for my kids this soon, others asked me to stop the family union and give it a little time to study her character. I suggested some space but she felt very bad, she thinks I am sending them away. I had to allow them stay while I use the opportunity to observe the new found love and family.

12days after, I realize that in a bid to reorganize me and help me to move ahead in life, she totally disregards anything that concerns my late wife whom I still hold dear to my heart, same as my daughter and my adopted daughter, I don't like to address her as a maid. We loved and cherished my late wife, everything she introduced seems to be strange to the norms of the family. If I try to raise my concerns for her to adjust, she will simply tell me that the dead is dead and I should just forget everything about her including whatever she stood for as a mother and wife.

If I try to talk some senses into her to make her understand that brooding over the dead is different from honouring and respecting the deseased, she gets really angry claiming I am comparing her with a dead person. Whatever she discovers as our way of doing things in the family she disregards it and replaces it with her own way without minding how we feel as a family or how easy or difficult it is for us to adjust.

It looks like we are the only ones tolerating and accommodating them here, I have tried with no avail to stop her from insulting the memory of my late wife. I discussed with each and everyone at home, they all wish I could perform a miracle to have them leave because no one can tolerate the mother and kids anymore, I am equally fed up myself and willing to take a break.

I have a friend who is aware of my problems with her, he told me that I am the problem here, he said it will be hard for any woman to fit into our family way of doing things and it will be difficult for us to cope with a different way of life introduced by another woman.

I hope I can get one or two advices that could help. I am quite confused

family6644:
I need serious advise from experienced nairalanders, please forgive my lengthy message because it requires detailed explanations.

I lost my wife exactly 3 months ago, 4 years of relationship and 13 years of marriage with her before she passed on, she left behind 3kids, 13yr old girl 7yr and 3yr old boys. I understand marriages are full of their challenges but we have been through the journey and we came out victorious having a loving and happy home, a union other partners appreciates.

My late wife was so organized and we trainned my kids to be independent while she travels on local business trips. So I just needed to continue our family habit of buying and stocking everything at home while they manage themselves with the help of an older maid who has been part of the family for many years, in short, we are faring quite well as I continue to mourn my wife and carry on with life.

Here is the problem, from a lot of condolence messages coming in on my Facebook, I had the chance to reply some of them 2weeks ago, I met this single mother of two who invited my kids to her daughter's birthday party, i was reluctant but she said it is time to start taking the kids out since they are yet to resume school, exactly what they needed at that point was the usual outing which has been missing for a while since their mother's sickness and after her demise, approx 6months in total. She said it's not a loud party that she needed only my kids for the small sitting room party.

I decided, went to the party with the kids, it was fun for the kids, I have not seen them happy like that in a long while, it made me happy too, they fell in love with the two sisters and their mother all like a miracle, my little 3year old boy started calling her mommy, others follow and it all seem like a family reunion. We left late at night with her girls asking that they meet again the next day which was a Sunday. To cut it short, my kids and hers agreed to meet the next day except for me. To be honest, the lady is a nice and lovely person to be with, she's a realtor who can work from home, she's real and beautiful, she has been a single mother for 4yrs after her husband travelled out and abandoned them to marry another woman, that's according to her.

She called me that her kids could not allow her rest, they said if we can't come, she should bring them to our house, I mildly rejected but i was persuaded by my daughter and my first son to have them around, I could see that they have bonded quite well, I want my kids to be happy too, that's what I have always wanted for them so I agreed and gave them our address. To cut the story short, I find it impossible to separate the two families that has come together to become one, when they were leaving back to their house my kids pleaded with me to allow them go with mommy to her house, I understand that is real because she's lovely with kids. I had the confidence to trust my kids with someone for the first time in my life. They didn't want to come back, I had to go and pick them up the next day, all of them made sure they came back home with me, we started living together as a family and everyone was enjoying it.

It became an automatic affair with her, I was worried about it been too early, I had to involve few of my friends to seek opinions, some were happy that i could get a good mother for my kids this soon, others asked me to stop the family union and give it a little time to study her character. I suggested some space but she felt very bad, she thinks I am sending them away. I had to allow them stay while I use the opportunity to observe the new found love and family.

12days after, I realize that in a bid to reorganize me and help me to move ahead in life, she totally disregards anything that concerns my late wife whom I still hold dear to my heart, same as my daughter and my adopted daughter, I don't like to address her as a maid. We loved and cherished my late wife, everything she introduced seems to be strange to the norms of the family. If I try to raise my concerns for her to adjust, she will simply tell me that the dead is dead and I should just forget everything about her including whatever she stood for as a mother and wife.

If I try to talk some senses into her to make her understand that brooding over the dead is different from honouring and respecting the deseased, she gets really angry claiming I am comparing her with a dead person. Whatever she discovers as our way of doing things in the family she disregards it and replaces it with her own way without minding how we feel as a family or how easy or difficult it is for us to adjust.

It looks like we are the only ones tolerating and accommodating them here, I have tried with no avail to stop her from insulting the memory of my late wife. I discussed with each and everyone at home, they all wish I could perform a miracle to have them leave because no one can tolerate the mother and kids anymore, I am equally fed up myself and willing to take a break.

I have a friend who is aware of my problems with her, he told me that I am the problem here, he said it will be hard for any woman to fit into our family way of doing things and it will be difficult for us to cope with a different way of life introduced by another woman.

I hope I can get one or two advices that could help. I am quite confused

Joydan95:

I tell you...Best decision ever

stacyadams:
just three months after ur wife passed on,ur thinking of another woman already ....single mother for that matter with kids. una see as una dey carry divide una house ...better leave that woman alone.....she will be nice now but I assure u that u will still come back to lament on nairaland...let ur adopted daughter take care of d house as best as she can.......


Fear women...any child apart from their own child dey suffer am....u can c d red flags already and it's plenty

crackhaus:
She should not be in a rush to have things done her way. She might have good intentions, but her management skills are quite poor and will betray those good intentions.

What she needs to do first, is learn how to fit into the way your late wife ran the house, and then very gradually make changes little by little.
Just showing up and wanting to do a complete overhaul is very disrespectful.

Why are you people even living together so soon?
This I don't understand...

GboyegaD:
Oga, in 12 days she's already acting like the boss. You might be able to cope but please think about the children. From your story, she seems desperate as well and that is not a good sign.

stacyadams:
just three months after ur wife passed on,ur thinking of another woman already ....single mother for that matter with kids. una see as una dey carry divide una house ...better leave that woman alone.....she will be nice now but I assure u that u will still come back to lament on nairaland...let ur adopted daughter take care of d house as best as she can.......


Fear women...any child apart from their own child dey suffer am....u can c d red flags already and it's plenty

deavicky:
honestly I tot he meant 12 years. How can he not know how to break a relationship of just less than 2 weeks.
It appears there more to this.

family6644:
I need serious advise from experienced nairalanders, please forgive my lengthy message because it requires detailed explanations.

I lost my wife exactly 3 months ago, 4 years of relationship and 13 years of marriage with her before she passed on, she left behind 3kids, 13yr old girl 7yr and 3yr old boys. I understand marriages are full of their challenges but we have been through the journey and we came out victorious having a loving and happy home, a union other partners appreciates.

My late wife was so organized and we trainned my kids to be independent while she travels on local business trips. So I just needed to continue our family habit of buying and stocking everything at home while they manage themselves with the help of an older maid who has been part of the family for many years, in short, we are faring quite well as I continue to mourn my wife and carry on with life.

Here is the problem, from a lot of condolence messages coming in on my Facebook, I had the chance to reply some of them 2weeks ago, I met this single mother of two who invited my kids to her daughter's birthday party, i was reluctant but she said it is time to start taking the kids out since they are yet to resume school, exactly what they needed at that point was the usual outing which has been missing for a while since their mother's sickness and after her demise, approx 6months in total. She said it's not a loud party that she needed only my kids for the small sitting room party.

I decided, went to the party with the kids, it was fun for the kids, I have not seen them happy like that in a long while, it made me happy too, they fell in love with the two sisters and their mother all like a miracle, my little 3year old boy started calling her mommy, others follow and it all seem like a family reunion. We left late at night with her girls asking that they meet again the next day which was a Sunday. To cut it short, my kids and hers agreed to meet the next day except for me. To be honest, the lady is a nice and lovely person to be with, she's a realtor who can work from home, she's real and beautiful, she has been a single mother for 4yrs after her husband travelled out and abandoned them to marry another woman, that's according to her.

She called me that her kids could not allow her rest, they said if we can't come, she should bring them to our house, I mildly rejected but i was persuaded by my daughter and my first son to have them around, I could see that they have bonded quite well, I want my kids to be happy too, that's what I have always wanted for them so I agreed and gave them our address. To cut the story short, I find it impossible to separate the two families that has come together to become one, when they were leaving back to their house my kids pleaded with me to allow them go with mommy to her house, I understand that is real because she's lovely with kids. I had the confidence to trust my kids with someone for the first time in my life. They didn't want to come back, I had to go and pick them up the next day, all of them made sure they came back home with me, we started living together as a family and everyone was enjoying it.

It became an automatic affair with her, I was worried about it been too early, I had to involve few of my friends to seek opinions, some were happy that i could get a good mother for my kids this soon, others asked me to stop the family union and give it a little time to study her character. I suggested some space but she felt very bad, she thinks I am sending them away. I had to allow them stay while I use the opportunity to observe the new found love and family.

12days after, I realize that in a bid to reorganize me and help me to move ahead in life, she totally disregards anything that concerns my late wife whom I still hold dear to my heart, same as my daughter and my adopted daughter, I don't like to address her as a maid. We loved and cherished my late wife, everything she introduced seems to be strange to the norms of the family. If I try to raise my concerns for her to adjust, she will simply tell me that the dead is dead and I should just forget everything about her including whatever she stood for as a mother and wife.

If I try to talk some senses into her to make her understand that brooding over the dead is different from honouring and respecting the deseased, she gets really angry claiming I am comparing her with a dead person. Whatever she discovers as our way of doing things in the family she disregards it and replaces it with her own way without minding how we feel as a family or how easy or difficult it is for us to adjust.

It looks like we are the only ones tolerating and accommodating them here, I have tried with no avail to stop her from insulting the memory of my late wife. I discussed with each and everyone at home, they all wish I could perform a miracle to have them leave because no one can tolerate the mother and kids anymore, I am equally fed up myself and willing to take a break.

I have a friend who is aware of my problems with her, he told me that I am the problem here, he said it will be hard for any woman to fit into our family way of doing things and it will be difficult for us to cope with a different way of life introduced by another woman.

I hope I can get one or two advices that could help. I am quite confused

lamentor78:
Oga Mr, if a woman has a good character no man will leave her with kids and run away, the woman has seen your weakness[b], if you have not start sleeping with her please send her away for your own good and for your kids.[/b]
Is better you have side chick than want to harbor a strange woman in your house o.
I don talk my own