Ladyhippolyta88:

But single mothers still get married and their husbands are not stupid.

Just keep shut, your opinion changes nothing

There are people who see nothing wrong in being a yahoo boy. In fact, many women say they want to marry God-fearing yahoo boys

Belafonte:


There are people who see nothing wrong in being a yahoo boy. In fact, many women say they want to marry God-fearing yahoo boys

How e take concern me and how e take change the fact say single mothers dey marry everyday

Ladyhippolyta88:

How e take concern me and how e take change the fact say single mothers dey marry everyday

Even after the super scandalous MMM crash saga, there are Nigerians still investing their hard-earned cash in ponzi schemes. The desperate repetition of stupidity does not suddenly make it wise

Belafonte:


Even after the super scandalous MMM crash saga, there are Nigerians still investing their hard-earned cash in ponzi schemes. The desperate repetition of stupidity does not suddenly make it wise

The only stupidity I see here is the one you are exhibiting.

Return back to your cave and leave my mentions alone.

Ladyhippolyta88:


The only stupidity I see here is the one you are exhibiting.

Of course, you're entitled to your opinion.

Return back to your cave and leave my mentions alone.

This is like saying you wish today was 1999. It's powerless and silly

Belafonte:


Even after the super scandalous MMM crash saga, there are Nigerians still investing their hard-earned cash in ponzi schemes. The desperate repetition of stupidity does not suddenly make it wise

.





.

Andrew87:

The were not married.

so basically you married a side chick/baby mama, a woman who the father of her 2 children did not deem fit to be his wife?

Bro thats worse than marrying a divorcee

Hammyaladin:
I just read the headline only and I'm pissed!

If you must marry a woman with kids, do so only when you know and have confirmed from genuine sources that the husband is late (dead)

If a man is alive hael and hearty, don't ever mistake taking his divorced wife and kids. Its a charity with no reward whatsoever.

Love you say?! Love is relative my man. Don't just get to a woman cause of you love her. Check and balance iq, literacy, degree of burdening you and many other important stuff.

Ass and boobs aren't the only thing to consider ( I know you didn't mention) but i'm just saying!

But sir you have forgotten many men lost their mind at the site of ass alone

babyfaceafrica:
Avoid single mothers if you are single .. He get why

Why

KingAzari:
But you knew what you signed up for when you chose to inherit a liability and and an abandoned property. Such comes with huge cost of maintenance and distraction. You never see anything. And which man in his right sense would marry a woman with two kids from a previous marriage? Could be you were the reason her first marriage failed.

Hahahagajs

Hassanmaye:

But sir you have forgotten many men lost their mind at the site of ass alone

That's why we have to train our minds.

To start with, see an ass as material for sitting. And also to push fat and pooo. This is the first step in freeing the mind.

Hollywood, BET, Music and porn have given too many unnecessary value to a woman's ass. Which is not meant to be.

You have to prioritize other things. Hang around people who don't water precious time in discussion women's from and back. See infact a woman with an average booty and boobs has no difference with there counterparts.


Train your mind and assign value to goal. Go for holidays, hiking, reading a book. Save money for traveling to places like iceland, Florence and other places.


Omo. There many important things to do in this God damn world aside prioritizing a woman's ass!!!


But it's not going to be easy o. Justake sure you rise whenever you fall!!!!!

Ladyhippolyta88:

But single mothers still get married and their husbands are not stupid.

Just keep shut, your opinion changes nothing

Any man who marries a single mother is stupid, has low self esteem, low self confidence, is not capable of getting good women, is not doing well in his life or some other personality/economic/social defect. NO man I repeat, No man! especially a young man who has his act together will marry a single mother, talk less one with 2 children. There are good looking, successful men that marry single mothers, but they are defective weak men, it's not always written one one's forehead!!!

Back in primitive times, when a warrior takes over a town and kills a man he takes his wife and kills his children, it is not in the nature of man to raise another man's child. Even a lion that invades another pack of lions will kill the offspring of the other male lions. Any animal that conquers another male animal will take the female and kill the offspring.

ONLY a defective man marries a single mother. it is against nature for a man to raise another man's child, talk less a woman the baby daddy did not deem fit or respectable enough to marry! No ifs or buts about it.

You dont marry single mothers and if you dont want drama in your life, you dont marry children of single mothers either because, by definition they have grown up defective with an unbalanced view of life. The only possible exception in both cases if if the mother was married and the father died!!!

johhnnie:


You may be right.

However, sometimes, once kids are involved, there are sacrifices to be made.

The case is no more about the couple at loggerheads. But more about the kids that are products of the union.

My philosophy has always been that, whatever social strata your ex spouse belongs to will always affect the upbringing of your children.

Even though, we don't live together, I still want the best for them.

Whatever the story that is told to them, once they are of age, I believe they will be matured enough to put things in the right perspectives.

The story is better told and understood by people with first hand experiences.

Personally, I think the court wedding is over rated.

I will sincerely advise young folks never to sign that document.

You can do traditional wedding. And, if there is true love, I see no reason for court wedding ( I.M.O).

See, I went through Hell.

I will not like to make public the details.

Anyone who needs counseling can send me an e.mail.

It's high time men were there for men.

Let there be a movement whereby men ( real/responsible men) will stand up for men and not against men ( I mean men who were/are truly abused and violated).

I suspect my 3rd child is not mine. But for peace of the mind, I have decided out of my own free will to be responsible for all of them.

I still have my life before me. We might have gone our separate ways. However, the kids were not asked to be borne. As such, as much as possible we must take up those responsibilities as real men as much as we can and as long as we have the means.

I do not condone domestic violence and abuse against women but the stories must always be set straight.

I have seen the following happen:

1. A woman took her wedding invitation to her ex boyfriend. They ended up having s3x.

2. A woman on her wedding night had s3x with her bestie colleague at work in thesame hotel she booked for the wedding.

3. A housewife paid for a hotel where she had romps with her lover.

4. A married woman while in a hotel for s3x romps with her lover picked her husband's call and spoke calmly as if nothing was amiss

5. Etc and etc, etc, etc

6. Don't get me wrong, there are good marriages out there. And, God bless those couples.

7. If it's not working, it is not working......

Wow some humans can be very wicked sha..same hotel with husband and ex..my God,I fit vex kill person o cos I'd be so so mad..hmm Godforbid sha..but most times when things like these happen I blame the husband because there is no way he wouldn't have seen signs no matter how little,but he felt he could overlook it and she may change after marriage or because he is so desperate to have her he would do all he can to wife her.

There was a story that one guy used money to snatch another guys girl and wanted to marry her and got approval from her parents because he was richer than her bf,she told him she wasn't ready for marriage but oga forced her into it,only for him and her to be seated during their wedding reception and she said she wanted to pee and left and was taking too long to return so husband went looking and caught her and her ex fvcking in the toilet,na so reception scatter o and during a family meeting she said she told him she never loved him but he kept pushing and forcing her so that was the result..so sometimes some of these men deserve this things.

perambulator:


[s]Any man who marries a single mother is stupid, has low self esteem, low self confidence, is not capable of getting good women, is not doing well in his life or some other personality/economic/social defect. NO man I repeat, No man! especially a young man who has his act together will marry a single mother, talk less one with 2 children. There are good looking, successful men that marry single mothers, but they are defective weak men, it's not always written one one's forehead!!!

Back in primitive times, when a warrior takes over a town and kills a man he takes his wife and kills his children, it is not in the nature of man to raise another man's child. Even a lion that invades another pack of lions will kill the offspring of the other male lions. Any animal that conquers another male animal will take the female and kill the offspring.

ONLY a defective man marries a single mother. it is against nature for a man to raise another man's child, talk less a woman the baby daddy did not deem fit or respectable enough to marry! No ifs or buts about it.

You dont marry single mothers and if you dont want drama in your life, you dont marry children of single mothers either because, by definition they have grown up defective with an unbalanced view of life. The only possible exception in both cases if if the mother was married and the father died[/s]!!!

I couldn't even waste my time reading this trash

Your wife needs to wake up and make sure her kids are not a burden on you. A single mum who remarries should make this her priority, not always looking for another man to carry her burden. She will keep making the same mistake with any man she meets. These days having 2 kids of your own is not a joke, not to mention taking on 2 kids that came into marriage and you are yet to have your own.

She made those kids with that man, if he chooses to be unfortunate, sadly she has to hustle to lessen OP’s burden. OP try your best to help, you married her with kids, 70% chance the responsibility will fall on you two. May God enable you both.

johhnnie:


My dear, we are in thesame boat.

I experienced something similar but in a different dimension.

Men, depending on the kind of women you got married to.... do not be overly expressive about your children. Do not always provide upfront. Let there be demand sometimes before you provide.

I used to stock the house for 6 months at a stretch. Daily needs etc . Apart from weekly upkeeps. These apart from other comforts such 24/7 light ( heavy solar installations with 2 stand by gen sets just in case

Next school fees already paid upfront before the end of the current term.

Madam showed me pepper.

Her boyfriend colluded with her to draw up a domestic violence case against me ( The legal fee came from the weekly upkeeps I was giving to her) . They got a FIDA lawyer. The lawyer helped them to write a statement against me ( I cried so uncontrollably when I read that statement at the police station). They wrote about how we struggled to build houses together, who I was in the community and I use my position to oppress and maltreat her ( all made up). I was to walk into a trap ( she would frustrate me into beating her). But thank I did not. I got wind of the plan ahead. So I made sure I didn't go home alone that day.

Thesame guy ;madam had approached me about to lend both of them money for an import and export business. I knew something was fishy. But my security was more important .


Writing my statement was easy. Cos, everything poured down naturally. A woman I saw through a private University from the scratch.

We were called in for interview. The rest was history.

I believe the lawyer that represented her was so ashamed when the truth came out. I was even the one that transfered the legal fees balance to the lawyer when madam and her collaborators could not come up with ( of my own volition though)

She took my children away for 2 moths plus with her father's consent ( the usual practice anytime she wanted to deal with me.. she knew I would be a nervous wreak if I didn't have access to my kids for an extended period).

Lots of manipulations. Like, trying to recondition my kids against me. They would intentionally not pick my calls nor allow my kids to call anytime my kids made such requests. See, I nearly committed suicide on at least two occasions. The fact that I made sure I was not home alone prevented that from happening.

The school fees for that term was wasted. I had paid ahead as usual. And, the issue happened right at the beginning of the term.

Well, I made sure that they didn't return to the house. I rented a newly built apartment and equipped it for them to a standard that I knew my kids will appreciate. I made sure that she has no knowledge of where my properties etc are located.

I gave her investment fund to start a business.

One day, I asked her why the other guy disturbing her or even her father didn't give her money for business or the legal fees to prosecute the case.

She was dumbfounded. Her father only gave 3k in all.

At the end of the day, my fears were laid to rest.

They played on her stupidity to obtain me. Most especially the guy that she thought was showing her care and affection ( supposedly).

Her pastor was also involved. I have some recordings to that effect. Her pastor telling her to record our conversations and forward same to him. Her pastor offering her strategies. I asked her why didn't the call us together for truce if at all something was wrong

The conclusion here, is that lot of the time, it is actually the men ( most especially the responsible ones) that are going through serious domestic violence and abuse)

However, because the society has been conditioned to think otherwise

Did you forgive her and brought her back or you moved on fully from her and separated ??

No vex.. I wan know..

Vireani79:


My brother
U said it all
How come I can see through the bull shit up there
The man aiming for monthly payments cos to him and his gold digging wife the man is wealthy
But men u tried oh
I am in shock at ur story
But like we agreed
To pay anything unless it comes up

But wait fess
Why still give her money to start a business
U guys are the ones letting these witches get away with evil

I have an ex
She is always blocking and unblocking me
Guess what
Shi shi I no dey drop
She tells me how she did so so and so for me

But forgets when she used to hit me
Smash my phone on my knee cap
Broke shame me

Post our fights on Facebook as a topic for her and her friends to discuss

Omo the emotional abuse was huge
But she claims to be a saint till date and how I keep things in my stomach
I dont forgive and all that bla bla

Yesterday she said my voice makes her think

She had to block me

Imagine my voice alone ohhhhh [center][/center]

My guy... Continue dealing with her emotionally .. hurt her back and never forgive that idiot...
That gender, they can't take a quarter of what they dish out to men..
I would always bless God for the day I discovered nairaland.. na me dey manipulate them now and not the reverse..
Infact I play all their games on them, Mind games, Reverse psychology, Emotional manipulation, Shaming etc..
You need to see how fvcked up they are when I bring those their traits against them..

Romanoff:
To those telling him to let the father take his kids, if you were one of those kids, won't you resent your mother for abandoning you?

Wouldn't you ask that "what type of mother will abandon her kids?"

@Op, you knew she had kids when you married her, I know it's not easy, but you both will have to double your hustle. Get other side businesses, cut your coat according to your material.

If you'll need to downgrade their school, do so, if you'll need to move to a cheaper area, do so.

Do all you can to cut cost.

Those kids will never understand or forgive their mum in the future.

Use two side look the matter.

Another thing your wife can do is to take him to court, especially for child support.

Let her get a good lawyer if she wants him to care for his children.

MODIFIED

She can go through FIDA to sort out Co-parenting and child support agreement.

For those coming for me, if you're not capable of talking like a homosapien, don't mention me, cause I no well. I will drag you from here to Timbuktu. So come correct

but they will forgive her for chasing their father away. Nonsense. This is why men should avoid single mothers and baby mama's. Irresponsible women everywhere

ABANGWABOI:



My guy... Continue dealing with her emotionally .. hurt her back and never forgive that idiot...
That gender, they can't take a quarter of what they dish out to men..
I would always bless God for the day I discovered nairaland.. na me dey manipulate them now and not the reverse..
Infact I play all their games on them, Mind games, Reverse psychology, Emotional manipulation, Shaming etc..
You need to see how fvcked up they are when I bring those their traits against them..

Omo no mercy

phorget:
You wan carry another man load?

Abi o. This must be a reason some guys out there are afraid to have anything other than s*x to do with single mums: the ex factor. I'm learning.

Ladyhippolyta88:


I couldn't even waste my time reading this trash

no doubt a single mother yourself

You know you really don't have to say anything, you can just skip this trend instead of showing how pained, unaccomodattng and emotionless you are, you actually cried more than the bereaved. I can imagine how suicidal most of your friends would have become cos they cant share their inner pains and challenges with you Captain all knowing

DirtyGold:
This thread is annoying me sef

Well done captain save a hoe... if she was so great, she won't be divorced now! Fresh girls are turning 18 every single day but, your sense failed you so badly that you had to marry a single mother of two.

No sensible man throws away a good woman that gives him peace especially if they have children together. Don't worry, what her former husband saw and divorced her, you'll see it too in due time.
How you people manage your situation is your headache.

What's tha business?

Belafonte:


Lol. A boy hates his father for not marrying his mother? I think the general IQ on nairaland has dropped that's why such loosely spun tales can trend

I swear the Stoopid OP wrote this trash and thinks everyone is senseless like him..
A boy of 8 that has been separated from his father for around 2 yrs or so..
Hated his father when he was around 5-6 yrs old for not marrying his mother..?? What does he understand about life at such age..

Incandescent:


You should have included this in your initial story. See how you have allowed them to bash you for nothing.

Plus you can't get the advice if you need if we don't have a full picture of the problem.

Since they were not legally married my brother hustle and take care of those kids as if they were yours.

Forget about the father. Do you part. At least you were aware she had two children prior to marrying her.

@least yours was helpful.. thanks

Belafonte:

Even after the super scandalous MMM crash saga, there are Nigerians still investing their hard-earned cash in ponzi schemes. The desperate repetition of stupidity does not suddenly make it wise

WORD ...
Bros mi ...my manchi ... Better oil dey your head, No Cap ..

Andrew87:

@least yours was helpful.. thanks

Brotherly, forget the name of moniker's bashing you, rather look deep into the message they are passing bro..
I know say deep down, you know say you don fvck up...
You are being used bro, No cap ... Nothing like love..
The earlier you regain your freedom, the better for you, it's up to you bro

Andrew87:


@least yours was helpful.. thanks

Sorry this is coming a bit late, but I feel I should share this with you.
There is an American record producer. He has produced and written for Frank Ocean, Beyoncé, Donald Glover, Vince Staples, and Earl Sweatshirt, among others, he was born in November 1991, of igbo descent and currently his networth is around $10million... Google can give u the rest.

Let me tell u a short story about him; His biological father decided to marry a second wife because he felt he had arrived; his first wife who struggled with him became nothing in eyes after 2 kids (Micheal & his sister). He subjected the first wife to all sorts of abuse, emotional, verbal, physical , even supported his own siblings to tag the woman bad just to justify his selfish reason of flirting, he basically frustrated her to make her leave.. In the end,, she couldnt take it anymore, she left with her 2 kids... The man told everyone she had runaway from her matrimonial home without telling them the part he played; with all the lies he was able to convince his siblings to help him marry the second wife.
The marriage was talk of the town(traditional just like the first wife); the second wife was very beautiful, fair, hour glass figure, the envy of other men.
The first wife continued to struggle for her survival with her kids, abandoned by everyone in her husband's family but not hers. God saw her heart and smiled on her, she won American visa lottery 5 years later and moves to the states with her kids,,, 1 year later God brought a wonderful man her way, she was 40 when they had their first kids (twin boys). He adopted her kids and they became a family

Fast forward to 2020, the first daughter was given out in marriage to her american fiance by her adopted father, the son Mic is already made, he uses his spare time to teach his twin brother basketball.
The father back home never had any child with his new bride till date, he lost everything , he retired to the village and lives off cash gifts while the wife is in the city helping her ministry not minding the age; his life which appeared bouyant initially, began to retrogress , he is critically ill, even his own siblings barely take care of him.

Dear OP, God sees the heart of everyone, no matter what we tell people, if your heart is good towards your wife and her kids irrespective of their mistakes, I encourage you to do your best for them. Ignore the man whether he brings funds or not... Even the bible says he that cannot provide for his family is worse than an infidel.... When those kids make it in life , for all you know they ay be the source of your own breakthrough. Many good women have left their homes, to leave not because they are bad, but because the men refused to live responsibly as husbands and fathers" remember even the bible supports separation where infidelity is involved.

Do your best for them, it does not have to be expensive, support your wife with what you have she will know how to manage with the kids. Dont hold back any good towards her and the kids because for the love you show them ,heaven will reward you... I believe my story drives the point I tried to make..I know so much because I am part of that family , we all grew up together in Festac.

Andrew87:
I got married to my wife. I love her both with the kids but the biological father of the kids is a bit wealthy and left the whole responsibilities to my wife since last year.

This is not funny because I am part of her although we hustle hard but it's not easy. He insists the kids must be with him if he must take care of them but a member of his family informed my wife that he plans to take them away and she will not see them.

Please friends what's ur take on this? Times are really hard.

U no get sense ...Na Toto dey confuse you ....u dey drag another man kid.no go Ben your own


If Na me I for don arrest you ....mugu

Thanks bro....

Sorry this is coming a bit late, but I feel I should share this with you.
There is an American record producer. He has produced and written for Frank Ocean, Beyoncé, Donald Glover, Vince Staples, and Earl Sweatshirt, among others, he was born in November 1991, of igbo descent and currently his networth is around $10million... Google can give u the rest.

Let me tell u a short story about him; His biological father decided to marry a second wife because he felt he had arrived; his first wife who struggled with him became nothing in eyes after 2 kids (Micheal & his sister). He subjected the first wife to all sorts of abuse, emotional, verbal, physical , even supported his own siblings to tag the woman bad just to justify his selfish reason of flirting, he basically frustrated her to make her leave.. In the end,, she couldnt take it anymore, she left with her 2 kids... The man told everyone she had runaway from her matrimonial home without telling them the part he played; with all the lies he was able to convince his siblings to help him marry the second wife.
The marriage was talk of the town(traditional just like the first wife); the second wife was very beautiful, fair, hour glass figure, the envy of other men.
The first wife continued to struggle for her survival with her kids, abandoned by everyone in her husband's family but not hers. God saw her heart and smiled on her, she won American visa lottery 5 years later and moves to the states with her kids,,, 1 year later God brought a wonderful man her way, she was 40 when they had their first kids (twin boys). He adopted her kids and they became a family

Fast forward to 2020, the first daughter was given out in marriage to her american fiance by her adopted father, the son Mic is already made, he uses his spare time to teach his twin brother basketball.
The father back home never had any child with his new bride till date, he lost everything , he retired to the village and lives off cash gifts while the wife is in the city helping her ministry not minding the age; his life which appeared bouyant initially, began to retrogress , he is critically ill, even his own siblings barely take care of him.

Dear OP, God sees the heart of everyone, no matter what we tell people, if your heart is good towards your wife and her kids irrespective of their mistakes, I encourage you to do your best for them. Ignore the man whether he brings funds or not... Even the bible says he that cannot provide for his family is worse than an infidel.... When those kids make it in life , for all you know they ay be the source of your own breakthrough. Many good women have left their homes, to leave not because they are bad, but because the men refused to live responsibly as husbands and fathers" remember even the bible supports separation where infidelity is involved.

Do your best for them, it does not have to be expensive, support your wife with what you have she will know how to manage with the kids. Dont hold back any good towards her and the kids because for the love you show them ,heaven will reward you... I believe my story drives the point I tried to make..I know so much because I am part of that family , we all grew up together in Festac.[/quote]

perambulator:


Any man who marries a single mother is stupid, has low self esteem, low self confidence, is not capable of getting good women, is not doing well in his life or some other personality/economic/social defect. NO man I repeat, No man! especially a young man who has his act together will marry a single mother, talk less one with 2 children. There are good looking, successful men that marry single mothers, but they are defective weak men, it's not always written one one's forehead!!!

Back in primitive times, when a warrior takes over a town and kills a man he takes his wife and kills his children, it is not in the nature of man to raise another man's child. Even a lion that invades another pack of lions will kill the offspring of the other male lions. Any animal that conquers another male animal will take the female and kill the offspring.

ONLY a defective man marries a single mother. it is against nature for a man to raise another man's child, talk less a woman the baby daddy did not deem fit or respectable enough to marry! No ifs or buts about it.

You dont marry single mothers and if you dont want drama in your life, you dont marry children of single mothers either because, by definition they have grown up defective with an unbalanced view of life. The only possible exception in both cases if if the mother was married and the father died!!!

Lol... Hot volcanic lava.