chatinent:
I don't understand what you'll take on after we advise you but if I were in your shoes, I'll sit her down and talk sense into her.
No petting!
No sweet names!


It's a legit: “let this be the first and last time you talk to me in that way. And here is how it is going to be: you are going to be using N30k each month to cook for the next six months until you learn to manage. Most families feed with N7k weekly on food for more than three persons and you are making me look stupid giving you N50k with some other sums for misc for just you, the baby, and I...when I also provide money for bulk purchases. I warn you, don't angry me, and you've been banned from requesting additional money from me till further notice!” Well, btw, Abeg jare, contact me for thesis and dissertation writing.

So...Alpha males lidis still exist? Chop knuckles jaree..

1) Buy in bulk. A bag of Rice is btwn 22,000 and 26,000. Buy Yam, garri, beans and spaghetti, indomie. At least the staples. From what you give her, i believe you can afford to. Don't forget Vegetable oil and Red oil, 30 litres can suffice. This can last you for three months if not more.

2) You need beverages. Milo, Milk, sugar, butter etc.

3) Budget for filling of gas, 12.5kg @ 7,500. Can take you a month or more. Have a 3kg reserve.

4) Budget 7,000 for soup and stew every week.
4,000 for beef/chicken and the remaining for pepper, tomato and ingredients.

5) Be involved in the kitchen matters. Not by lording it over her, but visit the kitchen from time to time. See what's happening, play with her there. Jokingly call her attention to any waste and if anything is about to be finished. You'll finally be able to know what's obtainable in the market.

6) The truth is, the market is not smiling. Went with my wife to market with 30,000. What we came back with was a bagco bag and half. It's ridiculous out there bro. So just get involved, to avoid complaining, so you will see how she's using the money and maybe you'll appreciate her more or she'll learn to manage more.

DKM123:
Nairaland is full of poverty stricken men, though. No real men on this platform. Just poor small boys and touts.. #50k for a family of 4 in this present Buhari's Nigeria?

That's like 12k each for a month on food.

That's like #400 for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

That's like #140 naira for each meal

Kai! Kai! Kai!

How much is a piece of meat in the local buka? I am sure OP will always insist for big meat in his food o.

Yet they are attacking the poor woman as if she is committing an abomination. Nairaland is full of poverty stricken mofos. Walahi.

Why not go to the market yourself OP and go and shop. When you buy 4liters of local groundnut oil alone for 8k and same 4 litres of palm oil for 3k, your eye go neat. You will wonder wether you lost money. Thanks to Buhari.

You better seat her down and appeal to her to try and manage the money and that's NOT BECAUSE it is ENOUGH and adequate but BECAUSE that's all you have. There is a way you will show love and pet your woman and she will actually perform magic. Don't listen to this small boys on nairaland that are experts at romancing poverty, if not your marriage will just scatter.

BTW, OP, if you like go and impregnate her again inside that #50k. Then expect her to perform magic. Nonsense and high blood pressure. If you are not financially ready to start a family, then don't get married and bring kids into the world to suffer but you people will not listen. Is marriage by force? Those waiting to be financially capable before venturing, are they f*oools? School fees hasn't even started and there is already fire on the mountain! Instead of strategizing how to improve your finance, you are running to nairaland to report your wife!

Are you sure that you read the story? The fact that you are rich does not mean everybody is like you. A man giving his wife 1k per day for transportation to her place of work, that's at least 25k in a month. She's not contributing a dime from her salary, yet complains that 50k monthly for feeding is too small. Is that not madness? The fact that you are also supporting this shows the kind of society we have today.

If the man dies tomorrow, she would explain who's going to be dishing out 80k monthly for her.

Note: I am not saying 50k is too much, but she has a job. Why can't she augment that 50k with say 20k from her salary? Meanwhile she has her own family member in same house.

Would she have been happy if she was the one bringing the money while her husband's relative is in same house? We need to learn how to be empathic abeg. It's not easy to make money.


Modified: This one na men hater, so I expect a senseless response.

BluntNigerian:
What type of food have you been feeding yourself with, that you consume more than N50,000 every week just on feeding?

the thing weak me.... weytin e dey chop, you can still get akpu and egusi soup for 800 cad

I am so sorry to say these ..

Why is it difficult for most people to read before saying rubbish?

The OP said the wife is working for crying out loud,she is working,we all know things are difficult,so the man should kill himself?

What is the wife doing with her salary?

Where is the support system in marriage?

We should learn to manage ,they are some men who does not have a job with family of 5 ..no noise no abuse because there is what we call understanding in marriage...marry ur friend or better still marry who understands you

Marriage this days dey fear man

Cardealer2021:
The truth is that with Nigeria current economy 50k(less than a $100) can't sustain a family of four, make the husband reason am
*She will buy food stuff
*Transport
*Snacks for the kids and miscellaneous on her own side.
Let the man make it like 70k at least.

Even me single guy with no responsibility spend more than that a week sometimes not to talk of family of 4

Modified:
Sorry I didn't read the post well I thought the 50k was for food stuff and her up keep

Abeg forgive me I didn't even read the part that the lady also has salary I thought she was a full house wife

Not reading might kill you one day

rajiedreez:
So many people saying 50k isn't enough here are funny o. Do u know that that 50k is some husbands salary monthly and he'll have kids to cater for too out of that money. If you're not wealthy don't act wealthy, he should let his wife know that

Reasonable submission, I wonder why most of the commenters here are talking like they don't know that millions of men earn 50k or less.

shantti:


Bro with due respect, 6k can feed a family of four daily.

Of course it can but what I mean 6k per market day, which is every 4 days.

Hmmmm....

What if you start doing the upkeep yourself since 50k is small for her even as you do give her 1k for TP everyday to work. And she's working ooo.....

Bros na God go help your ehhh...

Opus85:
Please how many Nigerians earn more than that 50k per month. Most people highest they earn is 100-120k. Remove 50k from that salary, plus other utility bills and tell me how much is remaining. OP still buys the bags of rice and other things in the house. Your wife is not prudent. As a wife, is she not supposed to support you with funds to increase the upkeep to 60k at least.
Some women can be selfish indeed. She works and still collect 1k transport from you. Oga if you die of HBP, life goes on. She will not die with you.

Better give yourself brain and live long for your child.

Another sensible and realistic comment.

Trojan8:


Are you sure that you read the story? The fact that you are rich does not mean everybody is like you. A man giving his wife 1k per day for transportation to her place of work, that's at least 25k in a month. She's not contributing a dime from her salary, yet complains that 50k monthly for feeding is too small. Is that not madness? The fact that you are also supporting this shows the kind of society we have today.

If the man dies tomorrow, she would explain who's going to be dishing out 80k monthly for her.

Note: I am not saying 50k is too much, but she has a job. Why can't she augment that 50k with say 20k from her salary? Meanwhile she has her own family member in same house.

Would she have been happy if she was the one bringing the money while her husband's relative is in same house? We need to learn how to be empathic abeg. It's not easy to make money.


Modified: This one na men hater, so I expect a senseless response.

Thanks for responding. I was gonna do that.

Trojan8:


Are you sure that you read the story? The fact that you are rich does not mean everybody is like you. A man giving his wife 1k per day for transportation to her place of work, that's at least 25k in a month. She's not contributing a dime from her salary, yet complains that 50k monthly for feeding is too small. Is that not madness? The fact that you are also supporting this shows the kind of society we have today.

If the man dies tomorrow, she would explain who's going to be dishing out 80k monthly for her.

Note: I am not saying 50k is too much, but she has a job. Why can't she augment that 50k with say 20k from her salary? Meanwhile she has her own family member in same house.

Would she have been happy if she was the one bringing the money while her husband's relative is in same house? We need to learn how to be empathic abeg. It's not easy to make money.


Modified: This one na men hater, so I expect a senseless response.

I was gonna reply you like I would to a reasonable human while reading your mention but I got to the ending part and realised you are actually a St*pid idiotic ewu! You are one of those nairaland women haters that I am specifically here for.

Why wouldn't you support wickedness that your own mother cannot bear. All sorts of insults has been poured on the woman because she says the money is not enough and it's tickling your scrotum, abi? What is the OP coming to nairaland to wail for? Are this crop of men here going to help his marriage?

Shebi the man is the head of the house according to you morons. Come and head now, you want her to use her salary. If someone suggest that the man start going to the market and doing the cooking, moronic imbeciles like you will scream Blue murder. Is this how you people want to do your "Alfa mail"? Abi na Alfa mail for only wickedness? That head, you morafvukas must head it by fire by force.

Did I mention that you are an idio*tic imbe*cilic mor*on?

Cardealer2021:
The truth is that with Nigeria current economy 50k(less than a $100) can't sustain a family of four, make the husband reason am
*She will buy food stuff
*Transport
*Snacks for the kids and miscellaneous on her own side.
Let the man make it like 70k at least.

Even me single guy with no responsibility spend more than that a week sometimes not to talk of family of 4

Modified:
Sorry I didn't read the post well I thought the 50k was for food stuff and her up keep

Abeg forgive me I didn't even read the part that the lady also has salary I thought she was a full house wife

Bro she dey work. And he still gives her tfare. Bros where your eyeballs dey? Abi dem no dey functions again? Or abi you no read the story.

You are the second to comment. That alone shows you ran off to comment before digesting what the guy wrote. Bro? You dey hear me so? Abeg go back and read the story again. But this time around read am line by line.

[quote author=BluntNigerian post=111235843] What type of food have you been feeding yourself with, that you consume more than N50,000 every week .



I join you to ask

efficiencie:


Reason wetin. You for sey make d man go kill himself na. Did you read the post? The man foots all other bills and buy food for the home outside the 50k. That woman is an ingrate and if she is not careful a side chick that has not seen 30k per month will snatch her man easily. She had better snap out of that childish mentality and start being a wife. Wives support their husbands and not constitute a threat to his wellbeing. She is lucky!

That stupid guy you quoted never read the post. He just commented for commenting sake.

on4a:
Dear poster,

This is an easy problem to resolve. I am sharing this with you as someone who also supports the wife monthly.

You have given her 50k for the past two years? From your perspective are prices still same across Nigeria in the last two years? Inflation is on the high side and you need to consider her request more compassionately.

Here is what you can do. Both of you should seat and plan how to increase your family income. Either she starts a business or you check for a new job. You need to respond to her more compassionately showing that you understand that things are on the high side.

Responding without compassion would make her feel you think she is spending your money on something else or stealing from you.

God has special favour on the marriage union when the couples are united. So you should both agree and pray on how to increase your income. This can be resolved easily.

God bless your home.

See nonsense wey you dey talk.

BluntNigerian:
FROM MY INBOX.



..
..
Please He Needs Advice.

Omo your stupidity is amazing... So for 50k rive, beans etc no dey

Well, I no fit talk shaaa

grandstar:
I am sure he has done all these. Nigerian women can feel very entitled. It is depressing

I doubt that very much since the man says he has been handing her the the amount since 2019.

chatinent:
I don't understand what you'll take on after we advise you but if I were in your shoes, I'll sit her down and talk sense into her.
No petting!
No sweet names!


It's a legit: “let this be the first and last time you talk to me in that way. And here is how it is going to be: you are going to be using N30k each month to cook for the next six months until you learn to manage. Most families feed with N7k weekly on food for more than three persons and you are making me look stupid giving you N50k with some other sums for misc for just you, the baby, and I...when I also provide money for bulk purchases. I warn you, don't angry me, and you've been banned from requesting additional money from me till further notice!” Well, btw, Abeg jare, contact me for thesis and dissertation writing.

You no dey miss target...

Mercychen:
Start handling the upkeep yourself. Don't give her a dime again.

Maybe she has friends she's trying to compete with or brag to about how much her mumu gives her for upkeep.

Maybe she's also saving part of it.

If truly the money is only for upkeep, then shes not prudent. Stop giving her altogether.

Oga follow this woman advice...

It's not an argument of whether 50K is enough or not. It's about cutting your coat according to your size.

In some homes 50K is snack money

50k sounds big until you enter market o.

It's not just enough to say manage it, help her manage it as the man of the house.

I say this because, I know what it feels like to be given so much, but you have a partner that is demanding.
Mine for instance will want to run Generator all night like say fuel cost hasn't changed. He wants to eat 3 different meals in a day and you can't give him a meal he ate the previous day, that means you can't cook in bulk and you will have to buy new things everyday. He wants to order sendemendes from time to time claiming its not an everyday thing. If I complain its expensive, he will say I am boring. I should losen up.Las las, money go dey deplete. When you ask for more he will say why didn't you manage what was given.

Trust me, if she give you that 50k to run the house for just 1month , e no go last 1week for your hand.
Either you guys cut your expenses as a family all together or you increase allowee

Thinktwicemybro:

You are wrong. Your are obviously not married. The problem is the man. 50k a month is average of 6k every market day. That cannot feed a family of 4 when you have to buy rice, oil, grandnut oil and beans out of it.

Why I say the man is at fault?

He should not make his wife a full time house wife. He should open business for her. If what's the business brings a month is 30k profit for instance, that will make the total 80k and she won't complain again.

A man should not complain when they make their wife full time house wife, except she is lazy and refuse to work, then the man can complain.

Baba read well before you comment na!
The OP said his wife is a working class woman. A good job at that

[quote author=obyikye post=111247032]50,000 divide by 30days = 1,667naira
Then 4 people will eat 3 times daily = 4*3=12
1,667/12= 138.9 per meal. IN FOOD THIS YOUR CALCULATION DON'T WORK,THE MONEY WAS GIVING ONCE NOT DAILY.
Crayfish
Meat
Tomotoes
Beans
Yams
Potatoes
Onions
Pepper
Soup condiments
Pap
Bread
Seasoning
Indomie
Eggs.
Samo/Garri/Fufu
Salt.
Spaghetti.YOUR WIFE MUST BE YOUR MANAGER,THIS LIST CAN NOT WORK,THE BABY IS NOT EATING MUCH FOR NOW AND THE FEEDING OF 9 YEAR OLD IS 25% OF WHAT OP AND IS WIFE WILL EAT.
OP WIFE IS MANIPULATIVE NO LOVE,ASK OP THE LAST TIME HE HAD SEX WITH IS WIFE.
SHE WILL NOT DO THE COOKING AND OP DON'T KNOW HOW TO COOK.

Goldbw122:
Well before you marry her, I know that you it was manageable because the country was easy before but now the country is a more complex situation now, we are at war in a silent way, 50k will not be enough to take care of family a month trust me, she is not doing any job, so how will she cope.. and everything rely on you.. so there is a problem, so you need to fix the problem by telling her to start a job or do something like a trade.. and make something good..

Did you even read this thread to the end?

Marriage is for matured men not for children, the reason I said this is cos in marriage as a man u have to take some strong decision at a time to save ur marriage, but if u allow ur woman to drive u like timper, one day she drives u like dangote. Remember when u die she continues her life. If it's one of my finger is trying to cost me death, I rather cut it off.

BluntNigerian:
What type of food have you been feeding yourself with, that you consume more than N50,000 every week just on feeding?

;Dabeg leave that thing alone abeg, e say na 50 a week.... just see talk

BluntNigerian:
FROM MY INBOX.



..
..
Please He Needs Advice.

Increase the money to 70k and stop giving her transportation to are work, this means you are still spending the same thing.

degamonn:
The other parts are not really my concern here neither do have advice in that respect.
My concern is somebody who is working and she requires 1k every day as transportation cost of which proceeds are not used to the benefit of your immediate family is what baffles me.
You do that for love right? clap for yourself

I was shocked, I can’t marry someone who can’t contribute financially as well. It’s not possible

BluntNigerian:
What type of food have you been feeding yourself with, that you consume more than N50,000 every week just on feeding?

Probably all those nonsense cuisines

chatinent:
I don't understand what you'll take on after we advise you but if I were in your shoes, I'll sit her down and talk sense into her.
No petting!
No sweet names!


It's a legit: “let this be the first and last time you talk to me in that way. And here is how it is going to be: you are going to be using N30k each month to cook for the next six months until you learn to manage. Most families feed with N7k weekly on food for more than three persons and you are making me look stupid giving you N50k with some other sums for misc for just you, the baby, and I...when I also provide money for bulk purchases. I warn you, don't angry me, and you've been banned from requesting additional money from me till further notice!” Well, btw, Abeg jare, contact me for thesis and dissertation writing.

hahahaha..... Military bro!!