speeches
Posts: 4

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What To Do If And When Your Friend Is After Your Fiance?
« on: April 23, 2008, 10:18 PM »

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Please, fellow nairalanders. What am i supposed to do? A friend of mine(i suppose i shouldn't call her that anymore) is after my fiance. I've got this very wonderful relationship with this very wonderful man who i'm so in love with and it happens to be the same thing the other way round. We share all confidences and recently i found out that my friend who is also his neighbour has been trying to seduce him by throwing herself at him. She wears skimpy things around him. She's been telling him things i had shared with her as woman to woman just to discredit me. She even went as far as telling him that we weren't married as so he's still single when he reminded her that we were engaged and she's supposed to be my friend. Please, i want honest and sincere advice.

What a friend! You must have done the same to someone in the past. The reason females should not keep female friends so close to them.

favcom (m)
Nigeria

Posts: 67

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Why Do Nairalanders Stray Off Topics?
« on: April 14, 2008, 05:10 PM »

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Don't get it twisted: I'm not a new member. I'm just curious why almost everyone in Nairaland stray off topics.
In fact don't be surprised that many responses would derail even in this thread (it's just our way now!)
So, your sincere opinions pleeease!

Because of hyper-active attention deficit disorder coupled with a genetic predisposition for being busy bodies.

ifystallon
Posts: 13

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Should I Tell My Best Friend, His Wife Is Cheating On Him?
« on: March 25, 2008, 11:52 AM »

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Should I tell my best friend, his wife is cheating on Him?

Please do you think I should. I am having mixed feeling because i don't want to end up being the enemy

None of your business frankly. You will definitely end up being the enemy especially if they both decide to stay together. One of them will definitely poison you out of hatred.

Learn to mind your business please or better still pay more attention to your own wife if you are married before he tell you too that your own wife has cheated with him.

If you are not married please leave them alone and hang around the beer parlours in your area with other jobless single guys like you. I don't see why you should be hanging out with a married couple for friendship if you are single anyway. What exactly do you want to accomplish here?

I say may God help you if they choose to stay together after all your "busy body amebo" work.

It all depends on your fiance nw,If u trust your fiance and you kw wat he's and isn't capable of doing,u need not get worried over that.as for that friend of yours i will advise u flee away from her infact keep her @ a distance u can nva tell wat she has nxt up her sleeves.

emiemi (f)
Naija
Posts: 70

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 Tips On How To Celebrate My First Year Wedding Anniversary
« on: April 29, 2008, 04:21 PM »  

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Hello all,
it's been a while, the reason- plenty work. Anyway, my first year wedding anniversary is around the corner and I need some tips on how to celebrate it. I don't stay in lagos, so I need suggestions on how to celebrate where there isn't all the nice restaurants, galleria, boutiques, etc. I have been trying to crack my head on this and I guess I can do with some help. I want to make the day special and memorable.

I would spend it in the village away from it all.  No light, no water.  Bare floor and in the bushes with T-shirt and wrapper only. like Ramsey Noauh and Stella Damasus Aboderin in the Nigerian movie "Never Say Goodbye" my all time favorite.

A village getaway holding hands to the stream and kissing in the forest under the moonlight sounds like fun to me. Very inexpensive too.

Enjoy!

olush0la (m)
Lagos, Nigeria
Posts: 15

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  Jay-z And Beyonce Are Finally Married.
« on: April 17, 2008, 08:49 AM » 

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According to people magazine:  After years of speculation, singer Beyoncé Knowles wed her longtime boyfriend, rapper Jay-Z, on Friday, a friend of the couple's tells PEOPLE. Though there is no official confirmation, the friend says, "It happened earlier this evening. Jay wanted it to be a really private affair – close friends and family."

See the link to the full story below:

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20188764,00.html

What an age difference!  She looks old already ingesting all that old sperm. Old deeek! After dating for all these years, I hope it lasts forever. I wish them well. 50/50 chance of success or failure like anyone else.

Jay-Z, 38, Beyonce, 26! Incestous! What an ugly old dude! He sure looks like a dog with bad teeth. Well, like they say, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

I will drink to the new couple.

9cent (m)
nothinghamshire, lagos nigeria
Posts: 32

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  Nigerians Why
« on: May 01, 2008, 05:02 PM » 

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i'm a nigerian but there are somewhats i don't seem to like about my country people and there lust for money.

let me start from

the igbo's.

there other name is money lovers. they will kill there folks for money ritual.
nobody want to be cheated instead they should all die.
they use there female children to do business by placing fat bills on there inlaw to be before he can marry there daughter. even if they get married, the wife in question will still be looking out at other men out there who are pretty richer than the husband to sleep with for money making.
they are never honest people. and they will do anything for money.

for the yoruba ladies,

nothing is good bout them. no marital commitment. marrying them is a complete waste of time.

they stink and love to go to party than goin to visit there husband on sick bed in hospital.
they believe nothing goes for nothing for them, u give me money and i give u Hot. lol

for the hausa'a, 

my god.

they are the most useless set of tribe in the history of nigeria. marrying them is like marrying the animal they Rear.
they aution there daughter to another man in exchange for a cattle. they flogg there inlaw only to figure out if he realy loves her. why do i have to go through pains because i want to marry a woman when she's not the one and only in this wide world? and the funniest thing is that they are mainly illiterates.

for the calabars,

prostitution starts off the day. the first day i slept with a calabar girl was hell on me. she had to tell me ? You JUST DEY START WHEN I THOUGHT I WAS JUST ABOUT TO ROUND UP. LOL
they are very rebellious when it comes to sex and money like the igbo's and yoruba's.  hausa's don't give much damn bout money rather [b]they will demand for a cattle in exchange for their daughters.[/b]peace out!

I haven't laughed so hard in a long time.

Thank you "OUTLAWS"!

Please come back and tell us about the other "tribes" in Nigeria, especially the males.

Author Topic: What Is Your Soft Spot? (Read 452 views)
9ja boi (m)
Naija
Posts: 156

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What Is Your Soft Spot?
« on: May 06, 2008, 04:57 PM »

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what turns u on.
what can revive yaw happiness.

Between my balls.

blaquie
london
Posts: 7

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  My Wife Is Breaking Up My Family!please Help
« on: May 05, 2008, 04:09 PM » 

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My family and i are almost breaking up Co's of my wife's attitude, t[b]hey have stopped coming to my house and my wife is showing no concern about it,[/b] am loosing my mind Please my dear nairaland members, What do i do?

Any woman that comes between her husband and his family is a witch.  Any man that comes between his wife and her family is a wizard.

Nothing much you can do.  Relate with your family outside your house for now till things die down while you work on your wife and what is bothering her about your family. You need to be able to come to some compromise for the sake of the whole family. Sometimes, the damage is irrepairable.

If your family is the problem, please ban them from coming to your house.  Your wife might have legitimate reasons to be offended by their presence. It is your job to find out where the problem is coming from and deal with the party appropriately.  What are you a man for?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XtYUVcEIPbU

My all time favorite!

Wow!

~Antidote~ (f)
Posts: 164

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  Re: Share Your Most Shocking Memories On Yoootooooooobe!
« #2 on: April 13, 2008, 04:54 PM » 

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@AJ, nice to see you around still doing your thing even though they tried to silenced you, How's is everything honey?   I will post my link soon.Have a lot on my hand right now, take care honey, (  It's me your Island Diva, erhmmmm

Hello baby! Will always do my thing. Not here to phock any body. Good to see you! Just got back from Nigeria and found out I was still banned. Who gives a damn anyway? Still able to post ma shit. Will keep away from some illiterate Nigerian bush pigs as much as possible!

I hope you are as beautiful as ever. Regards to tRoOE!

9ja boi (m)
Naija
Posts: 156

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Why Nigerian Girls Have Protruding Bellies?
« on: Yesterday at 12:17:38 PM »

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Nigerian Girls And Protruding Belly

You see a beautiful girl who's gt everything, but one thing just kills them:
THEIR BELLY.

Why do most Nigerian girls have protruding belly? Is there a remedy? Because I think I am not feeling it

The same reason Nigerian dude have protruding teats, bellies and butts. A bush of fat arses!

sfdaram (f)
lagos
Posts: 27

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Why Is Extral Marital Affair Normal To Nigerian Men But Abnormal To Their Women
« on: October 06, 2007, 02:23 PM »

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when a Nigerian married man is caught in an extra marital affair, no body talks about it but when a Nigerian married woman is cut in the same act, is always as if hell will let loose. why?

Because Nigeria is a sick country full of chauvanistic pigs!

Gosh!  I love this picture.  God bless Nigeria.  A piture is worth a thousand words!

Favorite deleted and locked down threads.


https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-129036.0.html


I greatly enjoyed this famous "celebrity" thread!  The power of super moderating skills!  What is good for the goose is good for the "fairy" gander!   This gander is suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure full of horse feathers and really can fly higher like any Peter Pan in this world.

What a Robin Hood!   Thank God I don marry.







https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MhybWFjuN2g&feature=related


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eamEz6oTa6k&feature=related


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mlkMc0ZaJmY


I think this thread was about "Little Richard" and his "Tuitty Fruitty!" and  "A Whole Lot Of Shaking Going On"!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dyswxUZ42L8&feature=related

No shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!   I thought it was allowed to show pictures of others around this website?  How come some threads are blocked out while others are left out?  Nigerian politics at work.  Thank God I saved many copies ooooooooooooooooooh to teach my sons why you should not stay at home after 21 years of age. You never get out of your mama's bed and you start using her lipstick and foundation to beautify yourself in competition for your dad's love!

zarazara
Posts: 35

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Eight-year-old Girl Divorces Husband
« on: Today at 12:39:47 AM »

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A YEMENI court has granted a divorce to an eight-year-old girl whose unemployed father forced her into an arranged marriage.

"I am happy that I am divorced now. I will be able to go back to school,'' Nojud The Great Prophet Ali said, after a public hearing in Sanaa's court of first instance.

Read the full article at: http://www.news.com.au/dailytelegraph/story/0,22049,23548125-5006003,00.html

At least this proves that there's hope for all those women and child brides forced into a marriage they don't want,

How does a 28 year-old man sleep with an 8 year old girl in any part of this world?

Napoleon (m)
France
Posts: 2

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Snake In The Stomach
« on: Yesterday at 10:19:47 PM »

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"IT'S IS BETHER TO SAY I DON'T UNDERSTAND THAN TO CLOSE YOUR TOO EYES AND SAY I DON'T BELIEVE"


I am a 29 years old male from Nigeria. I was born and brought up in port-Harcourt the capital of Rivers-State.
I am from a family of nine children, 5 boys and 4 girls, unfortunately 3 of the girls and a boy are late under mysterious circumstances,
Now we are only remaining Five in the family, 4 boys and a girl. I was 14years old when our dad passed out, he was 48years old.
He died a slow death, a very slow death, he got sick to the point were he could not go to the toilet by him self except somebody have to help him.
He was skinny like mosquito the doctors could not understand were all his blood went or what is the cause, but after many months of blood trans-fusion the doctor gave up on him.
Then he was taken from the haspital in the city to the village were he later died. I was very young i did not quite understand the cause of all this.

The first born in our family is a girl, she was 21years old when she got marrid, the marrage was controversial she was 21 and the man was about 60years old, but he was a millionaire
Five years after my sister got married to the man, he got stroke and could not move properly, from stroke to gradual death. and that was the end of him,
she become a very rich widow with fat bank accounts, she travels around the world to do shopping as she disire.

After some few months after my fathers death my elder brother the second born of our family got tuberculosis and followed by madness. he would stand in the middle of the street and start reading books, and in the night he would refused to come home to sleep. he preferred sleeping out side than in the house.

The third born in our family is epileptic from his child-wood. he is 35years old now , he is know as a thief and armed robber when ever he is cough we go to the prison yard to visit him,
all most every month we have to go to the police station to bail him out, There are occasion he comes home half dead with cuts all over his body,

The Fourth born of our family is a member of a secrete cult, He does nothing but to get hight on marijuana and to play poker or dice game all day long


I am the last born of the family, I left home when i was 16years old because of problems after problems I didn't understand.
I started smoking when i was 13years, I drop out of secondary school JSS-3, The only hope I thought I had was my elder sister who got married to a multi millionaire if only she would pay my school fees, But she didn't, what she does is to accuse me of stealing her money and call me a thief, There are times she would take me to juju shrine to fine out who really stole her money,
There are times she would almost bite me to death, And some times i keep wondering what evil have i done wronger to her, I can't go to the village because i didn't like the village life it was a bit boring to me,

In 1997 i was luck after passing through the Sahara desert from Niger, Algeria to Morocco i enter Europe and got my Residence and working permit,
I thought, at-least I can live a peacefull quiet life now that i am in Europe. Unknown to me my marijuana and cigarette addiction got out of controle
every blessed day i must buy marijuana to smoke, if i don't have money to buy i will seat around were they are selling it, if i see somebody buy I will ask the person to give me a little joint,
If i see you smoking marijuana i will ask you for a drag of joint,
Because of my marijuana addiction i came to know many people who are smokers and dealers, there are times police will stop me and search me thinking am a dealer,
I never take notice that my marijuana addiction was something else. I will walk on traffic lights when cars are passing with hight speed without taking notice of danger.
I almost got killed one day by a car. TO CUT A LONGER STORY SHOT,

There are times for a complete month, when ever i sleep i keep seeing vision, a very old gray headed man will be telling me,
"Don't you see your friends family, Cant you see that it is because of family witchcraft that such things are happening to him".

This very old grey headed man keep appearing to me in my dreams telling me about my friends family with witchcraft
The truth is, i did not believe in dreams or vision I didn't give a damn about all those spiritual stuff


THE REVELATION

In 2004 me and a friend of mine which i met through smoking went to a popular Nigerian bar, and we ordered two bottle of small stout and some weed,
but the owner of the bar refused to take money and insisted we have the drinks and weed free of charge,
but we refused and paid for our drunk's and weed, I notice that the owner of the bar treated us that day like we are prince,
But suddenly they deemed the lights inside the bar for some few minuets and served us the drinks.
Unknown to my friend he fund blue thread inside the bottle of stout he was drinking, he himself open the stout bottle so the is no way some other person put it inside.
Immediately i finished my stout bottle my mouth started swelling and pealling off, I could not eat solid food for many days,

When my friend brought out the blue thread that was inside his drink, it was a small thread but when he threw the thread on the floor it became the size of a table tennis ball

That is when it became clear to me that i have been poisoned by my fellow country me in Europe, I could not believe what was happen, my mouth was swollen


I WILL CONTINUE LATER ON HOW I DISCOVER SNAKES IN THE STOMACH OF MY FAMILY MEMBERS - HOW THEY KEPT IT SECRET FROM ME
THEY DID NOT ARGUED WITH MY FINDING THAT THEY HAVE STRANGE POWERS - AND HOW I WAS DESTINE BY THEM

Hmmm! I think it is time to summon the family "oracle" and ask some serious questions.

Oh my gosh, Spermdrops, let me [img]http://media.bigoo.ws/content/smile/happy/happy_205.gif[/img] you!

Remember my "orange analogy" your favorite! _{[seal my lip and swallowed my key down my tummy!!! ]}

Have a great weekend and BE HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

Damn, the month of May goes fast- - - time flys so quickly! 3 more weeks left for my son's school close for summer holiday!!!

happy mothers day to all the mothers in the house.

Sexaholic (f)
USA
Posts: 25

Offline

  When You're Extremely Hot:
« on: September 12, 2007, 09:39 PM » 

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, and you have nobody to break you off what do you do?

Phock myself of course.  Or wait till he comes home and attack him in the garage.  I have been tempted to try substitutes but experience has taught me that they all have "small dickees" at this stage in life, compared to what I have accqiured.  Don't want to risk the dismal disappointing experience and regret it for the rest of my life.   A few married exes still live around me and in other continents.

Now that is an option.
But, too many diseases out there.  I just don't want to quench from a "dirty deek"!  So I will stick with my fingers and toys! I like to play it safe these days.

uspry1:

Oh my gosh, Spermdrops, let me [img]http://media.bigoo.ws/content/smile/happy/happy_205.gif[/img] you!

Remember my "orange analogy" your favorite! _{[seal my lip and swallowed my key down my tummy!!! ]}

Have a great weekend and BE HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

Damn, the month of May goes fast- - - time flys so quickly! 3 more weeks left for my son's school close for summer holiday!!!

Happy mama's day in arrears Uspry1! You are so right. The month of may is about to zip by. Here comes June already.
The kids are off in about 3 weeks too and I have bunch of "London" siblings visiting with their kids for the summer. Please pray for my nerves!

I have already enrolled all of them in summer camp after a week's trip to Disney World.

Wish me luck!

How can I forget your "orange" analogies?

Yes darling, swallow that key and do not poop it out!

See you around! Thanks for stopping by. Did you get your "economic stimulus" check yet? I have already spent mine. Please say a big "thank you" to George Bush! Disneyworld, here we come!

Ooooooooooops!  Vacation time!  See y'all whenever.  Off to another website to cause some trouble. This website is dead for now! No interesting fights to participate in. Hopefully, I will not be recognized in those ones and be banned over again since I have asked relatives and friends to register different accounts from all over the world on my behalf.

He he he he he he.

When I want to really make trouble, I will go to Kinkos from now on.

Author  Topic: A Christian Sister Pregnant Before The Wedding: Is It Right?  (Read 613 views) 
Bensogie (m)
Lagos. Nigeria.
Posts: 38

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  A Christian Sister Pregnant Before The Wedding: Is It Right?
« on: June 16, 2007, 03:25 PM » 

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I still can't understand this whole thing. I believe the Bible is very clear on the issue of premarital sex. I attended a wedding of a Christian Sister, to my utmost surprise, she was already pregnant. I mean her wedding gown couldnt hide the swollen stomach.
I was surprised, to say the least disappointed. It was a church wedding. The Presiding pastor cannot tell me that he wasnt aware.
I don't  know were we are heading in the Church. I think if we profess to be Christians,then we should be Christians indeed.
What do you think?   

  Re: A Christian Sister Pregnant Before The Wedding: Is It Right?
« #39 on: Today at 06:18:58 AM »   

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Quote from: kola oloye on Yesterday at 08:47:22 AM
I didn't say so but

if anyone accidentally falls


let him repent and the Lord will surely pardon.

Amen to that!  For my lovely lord is a merciful lord!

I sure do love these "phock and repent" sermons!


@topic,

If a christian sister can phock before marriage, no reason not to get pregnant. The use of contraceptives, including "withdrawal" methods constitutes "cheating"! If I were the lord, I think I would find that even more unpardonable.

Same goes for the guys too.  Any waste of sperm constitutes an abortion. Be it in wet dreams, the shower or the hole in the mattress!

Please treat sperms kindly and store them in the containers provided by the good lord. No expiration date.  As you can see I am "sperm-friendly".

@sperm, are u the only occupants of this thread na wa ooo

acidrop:

@sperm, are u the only occupants of this thread na wa ooo

Yes! Thank God!  I am tired of dealing with low life idiots on Nairaland so I come out here to chill.  Do not care if the post counter is frozen or not.  See you around dear.  Time for a vacation.  Going out of town to enjoy my "economic" stimulus check from lovely "DUBYA", George Bush!

Off to Disneyworld!

[size=20pt]"Spermdrops"-------------You are banned from posting personal messages on this forum.

Reason:  Your name makes "sperm" come out of my nostrils and my shit holes when I fantasize about your husband![/size]


Useless Idiots!

Spermrops, where have you been? Hope you have not been banned yet again

knock knock ,hello is anybody home

knock knock knock



knack knack knack


knack knock knocooo
cant sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp

Imani:

Spermrops, where have you been? Hope you have not been banned yet again

Na only una sabi ban? Me I ban myself too! Off for a bleeping filled memorial day weekend with not monthly menaces to disturb me!

Howdy Imani.

Happy Memorial day in advance.

Who ban who?

Xiomarra:

Na only una sabi ban? Me I ban myself too! Off for a bleeping filled memorial day weekend with not monthly menaces to disturb me!

Howdy Imani.

Happy Memorial day in advance.

Who you be?

Nairalanders will never cease to amaze me


Spermdrops, welcome back


After investigating further, i can confirm Xiomara is spermdrops and the other aliases

You should be ashamed shooo, u get degree for bannology?

what do you think of the chelsea and man u match.

its such a shame i'd say. .but so is any game, u win some, u lose some.

na wah for some funny posts here o. u shouldnt just be relaxed with insomnia just because a thread like this is here, its a disease., see ur doc b4 it gets out of hand.