so i find myself in a kidna situation today that makes me wonder something i never really thought bout before, hence this thread. here's the question:

is it WRONG, as a Christian (ie. is it a sin) to "have" feelings for someone other than the person you're married to? and when i say "feelings" i mean,  the feelings are there, but you DO NOT act on them. is this wrong, bad, sin

I know the bible says looking at a woman "with lustful" eyes is equivalent to adultery, but if one "has feelings", maybe even intimate feelings, for someone outside your marriage but cos as a Christian, you REFUSE to act on those feelings,  is it still sin?

in other words,  is it the PRESENCE of the feelings that's the sin or the ACTIONS that result from the presence of the feelings that's the actual sin? cos in my opinion, i don't think it's wrong or sin to have feelings for someone who isn't your spouse, so long as you don't yield or give i or act on those feelings. i mean, aren't there times you feel like or think of doing something wrong, bad, and the feeling is so strong that you're just an inch or a second away from doing that thing, but you still don't,  that still doesn't count as haven done it. i'm not talking of wanting to do it but couldn't, i'm talking of having the urge to do it, but refusing to give in to that urge.

ok, i think i'm going round in circles now. but i believe my question should be clear now.

so, answers, what's your opinion and why do you believe so?