Hello nlanders, help me with advice to savage this marriage..
I had my first son back in 2013, so I left the marriage with the son I gave birth to for the family of that man, when the child was 2yrs Old due to the fact that, I'm not comfortable...
After some years, I met another man, wch was fruitful with a girl and just because of beaten up and down, I had no option than to left also but I took along my daughter, so I have bin taking care of her with the little I have...
Now I met another man, some years back, wch we love each other despite I told him I have had two children for the previous marriage, he loves me with everything and two years into our courtship, we had a daughter again but we have bin together loving each other but my husband in-law victimized me that made me to sought solutions before pastor, they prayed and they asked me to leave the marriage again
But where I'm confused now is that they told me if I'm to achieve, it's either I go back to man I born for or I should remain without having husband forever, please advise me cos actually, the first Guy I had my first born for is yet to marry up till now, will that be possible as that is a shame... or I should forget about having husband or I go should pray over the last man that Loved me even with Having two children... Thanks

Interesting
Lalasticlala

A question for you: what took you to go seeking for prayers?

Salvage actually..not savage*

Wow
Your marital life seems to be all shades of wrong....
You need to calm down...you are already troubled.... don't add more
Your three children should be the most important to you rn in your pursuit for happiness.....not a man
Don't think about a man right now,

Just relax....
Plan on how to take good care of your children...

With time, yeah give it some time...you will know what to do about your relationship..but for now...take good care of your kids
Don't rush into making a decision now so you don't make another terrible mistake....

And pls stay away from raw sex for now, so you don't give birth again until you are settled

Thanks

Confusion jndeed.

Remain with your current husband.
Don't mind the pastor.
Ignore your in-law. Or else you'll further complicate your life

Just forget about marriage for now. Make people no dey count husband for you.

So much trouble in the world- Bob Marley and the wailers-1979

Three kids, three different fathers... Hmm

You need first save yourself before thinking of saving a marriage.

I am trying to understand the in-law issues with the third man. What is his position on how his family members are behaving toward you? If he is supportive of you, then stick with him. The truth is marriage is not a bed of roses and different people have different struggles with their homes.

As for the first man, you left already but please don't forget your son. Keep him cordial and visit your son as often as you can.

Three different men, three kids, omo don't u think the problem is from u?


Although u were not elaborate in ur story but I think u should sit down a take a deep reflection of happenings in these three marriages and see where the fault is coming from.


Address it, if not u might end up with 10 men and 10 different kids

The question is..... Must you marry?

You know, marriage is not for everyone.

You might be one of the people marriage is not for.


Think about that!

3 men, 3 children. You need to examine yourself before you think of any marriage again.

Forget about what the fake pastor told you. That's how they feed.

Focus on yourself and kids ma, marriage is definitely not for you.

Three kids, three different fathers...
Are you sure you're not the problem?

Your reason for leaving the first marriage isn't clear...
Did you leave b/c he was poor or what
do you mean by you weren't comfortable?

You can't keep going from one marriage to another.
Stay with your current husband and make it work,
but if it's not working, get a job/find something
doing and take care of your kids.

Starz825:
Salvage actually..not savage*

Wow
Your marital life seems to be all shades of wrong....
You need to calm down...you are already troubled.... don't add more
Your three children should be the most important to you rn in your pursuit for happiness.....not a man
Don't think about a man right now,

Just relax....
Plan on how to take good care of your children...

With time, yeah give it some time...you will know what to do about your relationship..but for now...take good care of your kids
Don't rush into making a decision now so you don't make another terrible mistake....

And pls stay away from raw sex for now, so you don't give birth again until you are settled

Thanks

Thanks... May God bless you... But as for the last man, they said our Star does not match each other and we love each other, is there any way out cos my first husband is a turn off cos I have gave birth to two children, so I can't go there again

jazon:
Remain with your current husband.
Don't mind the pastor.
Ignore your in-law. Or else you'll further complicate your life

Hmmm.... Thanks

Why are you minding the pastor? Na una go just dey find wahala put into your lives.

You're already comfortable with the third guy, why are you having second thoughts again?

Do what's best for yourself, you only live once.

3 kids 3 different dads. Ahn ahn. Wetin u dey find

Only God can help you

Meet higher pastors because no emotional stuff you get here will be helpful.

As young man where ever u are in the world.

Avoid women who are busy going from one church or the other. With all Nigerian problems pastors and imams can't solve one major problem we have as a people,na marriage wahala them fit solve.

How can a pastor advice this woman to marry the first husband when it is clear here that she hasn't even been married properly?

That pastor is an enemy of progress take it or leave.
He asking u to leave where u are happy to fire.

ibechris:
As young man where ever u are in the world.

Avoid women who are busy going from one church or the other. With all Nigerian problems pastors and imams can't solve one major problem we have as a people,na marriage wahala them fit solve.

How can a pastor advice this woman to marry the first husband when it is clear here that she hasn't even been married properly?

That pastor is an enemy of progress take it or leave.
He asking u to leave where u are happy to fire.

Yes.. that is just it

Madam you sef have a problem. You left horseband number 1 because of poverty, horseband number two because of beating, now you want to face another one. What happens when you find fault with horseband number 3?

Wo, gerrawayu.

soomedics:
Hello nlanders, help me with advice to savage this marriage..
I had my first son back in 2013, so I left the marriage with the son I gave birth to for the family of that man, when the child was 2yrs Old due to the fact that, I'm not comfortable...
After some years, I met another man, wch was fruitful with a girl and just because of beaten up and down, I had no option than to left also but I took along my daughter, so I have bin taking care of her with the little I have...
Now I met another man, some years back, wch we love each other despite I told him I have had two children for the previous marriage, he loves me with everything and two years into our courtship, we had a daughter again but we have bin together loving each other but my husband in-law victimized me that made me to sought solutions before pastor, they prayed and they asked me to leave the marriage again
But where I'm confused now is that they told me if I'm to achieve, it's either I go back to man I born for or I should remain without having husband forever, please advise me cos actually, the first Guy I had my first born for is yet to marry up till now, will that be possible as that is a shame... or I should forget about having husband or I go should pray over the last man that Loved me even with Having two children... Thanks

Is like you keep taking in and becoming pregnant in every relationship you find yourself with out taking caution if the relationship will lead to marriage or not

I think you should just stay where you are, if any of them wants you, they will come for you

That doesn't mean you shouldn't go into a relationship

But try and study your ovulation period and avoid all these careless pregnancies

You are the one suffering and their dads are just walking freely

So now all your children have different surnames from even your own surname

Honestly you have to advice yourself

You are not a baby factory

Listen to your pastor's advice. He knows best.

Stop visiting all these prophets


Try and rebuild ursef

Find something doing to build ur financial capacity Incase this union fails again





good luck

What gives you the impression that the first guy is still waiting for you

Just remember about divorce for now

RepoMan007:
Meet higher pastors because no emotional stuff you get here will be helpful.

What does she need a higher pastor for

She didn't need even a lower one in the first place

What is the issue with the in-laws? You have to give us details. Stay away from pastors for your own sanity.

Forgive me, but your husband in-law

soomedics:
Hello nlanders, help me with advice to savage this marriage..
I had my first son back in 2013, so I left the marriage with the son I gave birth to for the family of that man, when the child was 2yrs Old due to the fact that, I'm not comfortable...
After some years, I met another man, wch was fruitful with a girl and just because of beaten up and down, I had no option than to left also but I took along my daughter, so I have bin taking care of her with the little I have...
Now I met another man, some years back, wch we love each other despite I told him I have had two children for the previous marriage, he loves me with everything and two years into our courtship, we had a daughter again but we have bin together loving each other but my husband in-law victimized me that made me to sought solutions before pastor, they prayed and they asked me to leave the marriage again
But where I'm confused now is that they told me if I'm to achieve, it's either I go back to man I born for or I should remain without having husband forever, please advise me cos actually, the first Guy I had my first born for is yet to marry up till now, will that be possible as that is a shame... or I should forget about having husband or I go should pray over the last man that Loved me even with Having two children... Thanks