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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Literature / A Friend Wrote This Pls Rate It On A Scale Of 1 - 10 (1422 Views)
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A Friend Wrote This Pls Rate It On A Scale Of 1 - 10 by enix2dmix: 9:53pm On Sep 18, 2011 |
At Night On My Bed, love, success, and pain At night on my bed i close my eyes Trying to sleep but picturing her smiles. I open my eyes and look through the window. Wishing she was as close as my pillow At night on my bed i look within I see myself great and i know i'll win Standing in the spotlight everyone's favourite Up high i know i'll fly like kite At night on my bed i feel deep pains My past hunts me and flogs me with canes I wish i didn't, I wish i did I wish i wasn't so stupid At night on my i think. i think pain, i think success i think love. Nnamani Chijioke |
Re: A Friend Wrote This Pls Rate It On A Scale Of 1 - 10 by breathing(f): 11:38am On Sep 19, 2011 |
7 |
Re: A Friend Wrote This Pls Rate It On A Scale Of 1 - 10 by Orikinla(m): 1:37pm On Sep 19, 2011 |
5. There is no great poetry without imagery. Use figures of speech in your vocabulary. See https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-64157.0.html |
Re: A Friend Wrote This Pls Rate It On A Scale Of 1 - 10 by Knight1(m): 7:09pm On Sep 26, 2011 |
enix2dmix: in poetry such as this, i think most people prefer the rhymes to run throughout each verse Good thinking. 6.5! |
Re: A Friend Wrote This Pls Rate It On A Scale Of 1 - 10 by ronkebp(f): 3:42pm On Sep 27, 2011 |
^^^^ at Knight, love your changes, but prefer the fourth stanza, line 1. to remain with the original "i think, think pain''.,adds a painful beauty' to that stanza. @ Poster would give it a 7. |
Re: A Friend Wrote This Pls Rate It On A Scale Of 1 - 10 by cisse7575(m): 4:03pm On Sep 27, 2011 |
7 |
Re: A Friend Wrote This Pls Rate It On A Scale Of 1 - 10 by meshybizzo(m): 12:53pm On Sep 29, 2011 |
i Agree wit @orikinla. Poetry requires gud imaginery, so we can not only enjoy d rhythm bt also picture it like a story in our minds. I'll give it a 6. |
Re: A Friend Wrote This Pls Rate It On A Scale Of 1 - 10 by daroz(m): 1:41pm On Sep 30, 2011 |
5 |
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