Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by occfx: 1:52pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
AmGreat1234: What many people are passing through in Lagos is something else. The funny part of it all is that, average of the people suffering there would never want to relocate and try life elsewhere. Yes for fear of been called a failure because it is believed once you go to Lagos, you must make it. Just like someone going to US and coming back with nothing |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by qtx(m): 1:57pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
some of the points make me laff while some are exaggerated 1 Like |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by AmGreat1234: 1:58pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
occfx:
Yes for fear of been called a failure because it is believed once you go to Lagos, you must make it. Just like someone going to US and coming back with nothing ..and the funny thing is that many of them still end up with nothing. |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by Didi2d(m): 2:00pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
ipobarecriminals: we dnt knw the BOSS between computer village/ALABA. Even up till today,ALABA boys from that side they SCAM steady. If nah lie,go to technology/phones thread. I have vowed never to buy second hand phone again. Those guys don't give a shit. Many years back at Westminster apapa, they sold a Nokia phone to me filled with fufu. I got home, charge and charge this phone the phone, omo! When I open phone na fufu I see inside phone o 2 Likes |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by imoh4king(m): 2:02pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Funny enuf, No 16 happened to me at Ikeja, Under bridge, in 2010. I bought a phone for N12k plus my old touch light phone from a guy who gave me phone model or case with fufu filled inside. I kept the fufu phone for almost a year before throwing it away. Lagosians. |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by Duru009(m): 2:04pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
"""When you see a large number of people running, don't wait or ask questions. Just run with them. RUN RUN RUN!!! Ask when it is safe!! Run o🤣"""" 2 Likes |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by lastchild: 2:09pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Icrave4u: YOU WANT TO SURVIVE IN LAGOS: 17 Things you must not do.
1. On a bus, When you sit by the window. Never operate your phone, It will be snatched from your hand. This is a quintessential occurence in some surbuban parts of Lagos such as Agege and Mushin. In fact, anywhere in Lagos.
2. Whenever someone greets you on the road, Do not answer him or her especially when he approaches you from behind.
3. If you see people fighting, Mind your business!!. I repeat MIND YOUR BUSINESS!!
4. You must learn how to argue with a bus conductor, when he tries cheating you. And please whenever you do. Please don't use Standard English. You must have had a good knowledge of Pidgin before you come to Lagos. If not I can teach you. 🤣
5. Walk with a known Nigerian, on the first weeks of your stay in Lagos. He'll show you the ropes or else you go suffer.
6. Whenever you're walking in a deserted area in Lagos. Walk like a gangster, not like a responsible person. If you do, Miscreants will feel you're defensive and wouldn't come close to you. Street sense ✌🤣
7. Anything you did not find on your head, Please don't pick it. (You understand what I mean).
8. When you're crossing the road. Turn into a Ronaldo. Cars come in massive droves. They won't hit you but you must learn how to dribble them. 🤣
9. When you want to buy soft drinks, Buy soft drinks from people hawking in the traffic. It is believed that the drinks taste sweeter than the ones bought from people in shops😅. Just a belief!!
10. When you see a large number of people running, don't wait or ask questions. Just run with them. RUN RUN RUN!!! Ask when it is safe!! Run o🤣
11. Never leave Lagos without taking a ride on Third Mainland Bridge. It is a sin😅
12. Don't dance to any music you hear, never stare or laugh at people. Don't speak to anyone in the bus until they speak to you first.
13. Whenever you walk in a crowded area, hold your phone firmly in your hand, not in your bag or pocket or else Sope oti lo.
14. Whenever you want to ask for Directions, say this. "Sorry, Please, Excuse me...then ask your question". It is compulsory to say all of them. Don't omit any. Everybody is angry in Nigeria.😂
15. It's often said that the number of people who are mentally normal in Lagos aren't up to 5. In essence, If a Lagosian teases you, don't take him serious. Just be cool to prevent issues. We're mád in this Lagos!!. I am the only nórmal person in my area.
16. There's one popular "Den of scámmers" in Lagos called Computer Village. It is the most popular place for buying and repairing electronic devices. But please and please open your eyes very well before you buy fufu package in a phone case of buy a swapped electronics.😁
17. And lastly LAGOS is a comedy centre, you will love the drama you will be seeing around.
Lagos, Its mix of tradition and modernity, combined with its rich culture and entrepreneurial spirit, makes it an exciting and attractive destination for people from all over the world. Lagos is very very fun and sweet once you understand the system. It's not a bad place to be, it's just a place to be SMART and WISE!! EKO ILE OGBON!
Explain number 2, please |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by occfx: 2:12pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
AmGreat1234: ..and the funny thing is that many of them still end up with nothing. More miserable and wretched... A place where oxygen is less than 21% na why whites and rich men went closer to the waters. I tell people Lagos is training ground, just go to Lagos and plan your exit from day one. It helps you live anywhere in Nigeria perfectly and agile but staying there permanently is a no no for me 2 Likes |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by ipobarecriminals: 2:13pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
mystery of this fufu 📱.So,una nor dey open case/checked b4 payment? Didi2d:
I have vowed never to buy second hand phone again.
Those guys don't give a shit.
Many years back at Westminster apapa, they sold a Nokia phone to me filled with fufu. I got home, charge and charge this phone the phone, omo! When I open phone na fufu I see inside phone o |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by professore(m): 2:17pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Some tips |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by Grays767(f): 2:18pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Goodlyhrt: Go PH you go know say Lagos dey play 🤣🤣🤣 |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by NwaliE01: 2:20pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Icrave4u: YOU WANT TO SURVIVE IN LAGOS: 17 Things you must not do.
1. On a bus, When you sit by the window. Never operate your phone, It will be snatched from your hand. This is a quintessential occurence in some surbuban parts of Lagos such as Agege and Mushin. In fact, anywhere in Lagos.
2. Whenever someone greets you on the road, Do not answer him or her especially when he approaches you from behind.
3. If you see people fighting, Mind your business!!. I repeat MIND YOUR BUSINESS!!
4. You must learn how to argue with a bus conductor, when he tries cheating you. And please whenever you do. Please don't use Standard English. You must have had a good knowledge of Pidgin before you come to Lagos. If not I can teach you. 🤣
5. Walk with a known Nigerian, on the first weeks of your stay in Lagos. He'll show you the ropes or else you go suffer.
6. Whenever you're walking in a deserted area in Lagos. Walk like a gangster, not like a responsible person. If you do, Miscreants will feel you're defensive and wouldn't come close to you. Street sense ✌🤣
7. Anything you did not find on your head, Please don't pick it. (You understand what I mean).
8. When you're crossing the road. Turn into a Ronaldo. Cars come in massive droves. They won't hit you but you must learn how to dribble them. 🤣
9. When you want to buy soft drinks, Buy soft drinks from people hawking in the traffic. It is believed that the drinks taste sweeter than the ones bought from people in shops😅. Just a belief!!
10. When you see a large number of people running, don't wait or ask questions. Just run with them. RUN RUN RUN!!! Ask when it is safe!! Run o🤣
11. Never leave Lagos without taking a ride on Third Mainland Bridge. It is a sin😅
12. Don't dance to any music you hear, never stare or laugh at people. Don't speak to anyone in the bus until they speak to you first.
13. Whenever you walk in a crowded area, hold your phone firmly in your hand, not in your bag or pocket or else Sope oti lo.
14. Whenever you want to ask for Directions, say this. "Sorry, Please, Excuse me...then ask your question". It is compulsory to say all of them. Don't omit any. Everybody is angry in Nigeria.😂
15. It's often said that the number of people who are mentally normal in Lagos aren't up to 5. In essence, If a Lagosian teases you, don't take him serious. Just be cool to prevent issues. We're mád in this Lagos!!. I am the only nórmal person in my area.
16. There's one popular "Den of scámmers" in Lagos called Computer Village. It is the most popular place for buying and repairing electronic devices. But please and please open your eyes very well before you buy fufu package in a phone case of buy a swapped electronics.😁
17. And lastly LAGOS is a comedy centre, you will love the drama you will be seeing around.
Lagos, Its mix of tradition and modernity, combined with its rich culture and entrepreneurial spirit, makes it an exciting and attractive destination for people from all over the world. Lagos is very very fun and sweet once you understand the system. It's not a bad place to be, it's just a place to be SMART and WISE!! EKO ILE OGBON!
I miss home. |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by NamelessOGBENI(m): 2:21pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Make I add to that number 6, you need not be a smoker or alcoholic to know this, whenever you're in a unfamiliar environment (particularly the trenches and all the run down part of the city) just buy cigars or weed, light am dey fling am dey go to worsen the matter add bitters to the equation. No con dey smile.
Most of the upcoming weyreys go avoid you like flea. 1 Like |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by Cantonese: 2:23pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
If you no sabi rush bus, then Lagos is not for you.
If agbero dey fight, no put your mouth.
No waka anyhow for night, especially for Ajegunle, Ijora badia, Orile/Amukoko, Ketu/Alapere.
If you do anyhow, you go see anyhow.
Where dem dey play cha cha, that is card, or gambling, face front. All the gathering together na the same. Dem go chop your money.
Shine your eye inside bus. Conductor fit collect your money twice if you fall mugu.
Avoid railway line.
Avoid egbe k’egbe.
As a bachelor, make meshai your friend for Indomie and egg. Also find one better Bolanle wey dey sell food as your friend. The day you no get shishi, she must support your ministry on credit until you pay. 3 Likes |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by Osariemen12: 2:39pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Simply put, Lagos is not good for sane people. I rather die a villager than live three consecutive calendar months in Lagos - Africa's largest slum.
Lagos, their Lagos. 2 Likes |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by AfonjaConehead: 2:40pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Addition When crossing the roads, always look left, right and left and right,even if it is one way road. If someone stops you to ask you a question,wait for him/her to talk first. If you can gesticulate you reply, please do,but if you don't have his/her answers,wave and walk away. If an area boy looking person stops you at,say mushin and is asking you for road to oshodi or ojuelegba, quickly walk away. If you have a long navy blue rain coat,knee level,like the ones navy men used to use,you can use it when in secluded places but keep a confident face and avoid eye contact,they might assume you are an officer. It walked for me some time ago,the idiots were clearing way for me Never hold you phone in your hands or pocket,the bag works well for me. Or in your combat trouser side pocket by the knee. Don't pick money on the ground o unless you believe in yaself or,as they say,piss on it first If you come across a lone tiny road or side cuvet along the road with maybe water or mud on both sides and you wanna cross,if somebody from the opposite side refuse to let you cross first despite meeting you, please give way for him or simply go back and let him cross. Don't be a Rambo or claim right o..some of them are these stubborn soldiers looking for "bladdy civilians" to flex their whatever Nor go claim right push army ,nobody go fight for you |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by olusma23(m): 2:46pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Never allow your change to be in conductor hand so long.. You might probably forget it when you reach your bus stop.
Try to hold small change when using yellow bus. If not, conductor go join you with another passenger when you reach bus stop.
Alway have the OP number 13 on the list in your mind |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by Nobody: 2:49pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
The most dangerous and worst place to live in the world. |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by AmotekunSW: 2:53pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Tecnophone: you don't necessarily needs to mention his mother, baboon. Look at this failure. You too are insulting someone? You that live like a churchrat. |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by Nobody: 2:54pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
ipobarecriminals: we dnt knw the BOSS between computer village/ALABA. Even up till today,ALABA boys from that side they SCAM steady. If nah lie,go to technology/phones thread. True though But the obvious difference is that Alaba Market is bigger and wider than Computer Village. After na Ladipo Ijora Badia Ajegunle Owode Onirin etc Extremely Terrible Places. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by Nobody: 2:59pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Osariemen12: Simply put, Lagos is not good for sane people. I rather die a villager than live three consecutive calendar months in Lagos - Africa's largest slum. |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by Sheriman(m): 3:01pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Any city you are living and have all these things in your mind is a dangerous place to live. |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by SyrusdeHansome(m): 3:02pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
[quote author=Mindlog post=124918211]
The number 4 "You must learn how to argue with a bus conductor, when he tries cheating you. And please whenever you do. Please don't use Standard English. You must have had a good knowledge of Pidgin before you come to Lagos. If not I can teach you".
I am very fluent in Yoruba and Pidgin English but even the last time I was in a bus years ago, I maintained my "Standard English" despite the threats by the bus conductor that he would not give me my N400 change, that I committed a crime by giving him N500. He was ranting in a mix of Yoruba and Pidgin English and I maintained a fixed gaze on him as I do psychiatric patients without responding to his rants, his rants began to weaken and the bus became quiet, I told the driver in a low tone I was dropping off at the next bus stop and the driver told the conductor to please give me my change and he meekly did so.
Thanks for the reply. No knowledge is a waste. |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by psychologist(m): 3:11pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
If you in buy anything in traffic make sure you collect change before you pay Very important |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by Fearyourcreator: 3:27pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Mindlog:
The number 4 "You must learn how to argue with a bus conductor, when he tries cheating you. And please whenever you do. Please don't use Standard English. You must have had a good knowledge of Pidgin before you come to Lagos. If not I can teach you".
I am very fluent in Yoruba and Pidgin English but even the last time I was in a bus years ago, I maintained my "Standard English" despite the threats by the bus conductor that he would not give me my N400 change, that I committed a crime by giving him N500. He was ranting in a mix of Yoruba and Pidgin English and I maintained a fixed gaze on him as I do psychiatric patients without responding to his rants, his rants began to weaken and the bus became quiet, I told the driver in a low tone I was dropping off at the next bus stop and the driver told the conductor to please give me my change and he meekly did so.
If you think you are crazy, I spent millions of naira and years in schools to learn how to deal with crazy people. Dem no go carry you reach your bustop them go pass another route and they won't give you change to enter bus reach where you dey go and them no go say sorry .. you go gbakamu ni... You never jam wahala |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by LtChisom: 3:32pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Icrave4u: YOU WANT TO SURVIVE IN LAGOS: 17 Things you must not do.
1. On a bus, When you sit by the window. Never operate your phone, It will be snatched from your hand. This is a quintessential occurence in some surbuban parts of Lagos such as Agege and Mushin. In fact, anywhere in Lagos.
2. Whenever someone greets you on the road, Do not answer him or her especially when he approaches you from behind.
3. If you see people fighting, Mind your business!!. I repeat MIND YOUR BUSINESS!!
4. You must learn how to argue with a bus conductor, when he tries cheating you. And please whenever you do. Please don't use Standard English. You must have had a good knowledge of Pidgin before you come to Lagos. If not I can teach you. 🤣
5. Walk with a known Nigerian, on the first weeks of your stay in Lagos. He'll show you the ropes or else you go suffer.
6. Whenever you're walking in a deserted area in Lagos. Walk like a gangster, not like a responsible person. If you do, Miscreants will feel you're defensive and wouldn't come close to you. Street sense ✌🤣
7. Anything you did not find on your head, Please don't pick it. (You understand what I mean).
8. When you're crossing the road. Turn into a Ronaldo. Cars come in massive droves. They won't hit you but you must learn how to dribble them. 🤣
9. When you want to buy soft drinks, Buy soft drinks from people hawking in the traffic. It is believed that the drinks taste sweeter than the ones bought from people in shops😅. Just a belief!!
10. When you see a large number of people running, don't wait or ask questions. Just run with them. RUN RUN RUN!!! Ask when it is safe!! Run o🤣
11. Never leave Lagos without taking a ride on Third Mainland Bridge. It is a sin😅
12. Don't dance to any music you hear, never stare or laugh at people. Don't speak to anyone in the bus until they speak to you first.
13. Whenever you walk in a crowded area, hold your phone firmly in your hand, not in your bag or pocket or else Sope oti lo.
14. Whenever you want to ask for Directions, say this. "Sorry, Please, Excuse me...then ask your question". It is compulsory to say all of them. Don't omit any. Everybody is angry in Nigeria.😂
15. It's often said that the number of people who are mentally normal in Lagos aren't up to 5. In essence, If a Lagosian teases you, don't take him serious. Just be cool to prevent issues. We're mád in this Lagos!!. I am the only nórmal person in my area.
16. There's one popular "Den of scámmers" in Lagos called Computer Village. It is the most popular place for buying and repairing electronic devices. But please and please open your eyes very well before you buy fufu package in a phone case of buy a swapped electronics.😁
17. And lastly LAGOS is a comedy centre, you will love the drama you will be seeing around.
Lagos, Its mix of tradition and modernity, combined with its rich culture and entrepreneurial spirit, makes it an exciting and attractive destination for people from all over the world. Lagos is very very fun and sweet once you understand the system. It's not a bad place to be, it's just a place to be SMART and WISE!! EKO ILE OGBON!
House Agents are next to hellfire, be careful of them. They fleece, exploit and frustrate you. 1 Like |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by AmGreat1234: 3:36pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
occfx:
More miserable and wretched... A place where oxygen is less than 21% na why whites and rich men went closer to the waters. I tell people Lagos is training ground, just go to Lagos and plan your exit from day one. It helps you live anywhere in Nigeria perfectly and agile but staying there permanently is a no no for me ... you're very correct |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by MN07: 3:44pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
slawomir: Damnnn niggar Hell no Nobody wanna go to that overrated damnnn slum of a place
Not to talk of learning 17 things on how to survive
Rather learn 600 things on how to survive in abuja
Have been to lagos and Abuja as a Bini son
And I must confess lagos is nosiy and a shit hole 💯 Yoruba people really messed the place up. Too many Lousy, Loud people. 1 Like 1 Share |
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Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by Menclothing: 4:03pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
Even office workers do hookup in Lagos be careful ooo |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by ikorodureporta: 4:39pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
all the points are applicable to every part of naija.... Thats how we boarded a bus to enugu...as we arrived onitsha driver warned us to secure our phones.....one guy was still forming lagos boy, because he wasnt directly beside the window....b4 him know, guy don stretch hand enta him side snatch phone... |
Re: You Want To Survive In Lagos: 17 Things You Must Not Do. by Johnn44: 5:10pm On Aug 06, 2023 |
xynerise: In Lagos, don't bring your "Holier than thou" attitude to someone who dresses obscene in the street. Just mind your business |