Good evenning nairalanders ,

I once created tgis topic
https://www.nairaland.com/7654416/ex-came-2-days-ago

While the love of my son made me to pay lot of visits to my ex dad house in Ajegunle alongide Sango road ,i find out my son stayed 2 months at home before registering him into 1 mushroom school and his mum never allowed me to know what class he was .He spent just 1st term of his Nursery 2 with me and was doing fine before his mum decided to shock me .The visits made us to had things together again.


Before the kids holiday started ,she came around once and we did stuff together and immeaditely the school break started ,she brought my son and in all,i would say we have stayed almost 3 weeks together.(She went back to her place at Ajegunle on friday , .She never returned any of the items she packed. I find out her siblings and dad got a room for her .So,she got the room filled with all my belongings .If i ask her about it ,she tells me to forget about it and i didnt even complain.To say the truth ,the love i have for her have diminished a lot and it is up to the level that i dont feel anything for her if i dont see her .I only develop feeling for her if i see her with my son .

Now,my son have been with my younger sister since 15 days ago
and i find out that boy cant even write or read but could only fit for Nursery 2 instead of Basic 1 he was supposed to be promoted to if his mum didnt take him away .My sister is a teacher and she is good at teaching very well.From the lesson she enrolled him and her sons ,i was made to know that boy cant even cope in Basic 1 .Even ,he will only manage to be in Nursery 2.

I had to shed some tears on hearing this .I called my elder sister and told her i will not allow him to go back to Ajegunle.I plan to create time for him when school resumes .I am enrolling him into Nursery 2 and also get a teacher for him .I will make sure i close early from work to do my own part .

About his mum,i am not interested any longer .She have really done a lot of damages to my life mentally,financially and emotionally .The worst of it is my son eduaction .She have messed me up so much .I was supposed to get a new accommodation before she packed away my stuffs but i spent all the money i saved to get new items .I started over again and thank God ,i am moving out of this house latest september ending .

I am so devastated and i pray God give me the strength to teach my son the way i want and may God bless his brain too .I have decided to live alone woth him so i can train him the way i want and in God way .He is 5 years and 3 months old

It's not that serious. Calm down. Some adults don't learn until they are adults. He is still a small child. He has time.

Op, make we do wetin now??

I dont know why it men that care more of their child wellbeing as in knowledge and perfect upbringing.....women care less

op focus on improving yourself financially, educationally and, spiritually.
The Male Child is naturally attached to his mother. Even if you sacrifice your life for him, mama always has a spot in his heart.

And how in heaven do you plan to teach that boy when your spelling and grammar sucks.

Exmilitant:
op focus on improving yourself financially, educationally and, spiritually.
The Male Child is naturally attached to his mother. Even if you sacrifice your life for him, mama always has a spot in his heart.

And how in heaven do you plan to teach that boy when your spelling and grammar sucks.

Let me burst your brain,

I am doing well financially i am sure .If i am not doing well financially,i will not put together 450k in 3 months .Just rest

And again,i typed those messages under emotional pain .Stop acting like a slowpoke if you cant advise me

Forget pikin Mata. Dem no Dey give award for best parents…

Focus on making the money. Also ensure your son has high self esteem, very strong willed, sociable, talented and has deep love for the goo d things of life.

Make sure his money consciousnesses is activated.

Educated people are the poorest these days, allow your son breath.

edoncast:


Let me burst your brain,

I am doing well financially i am sure .If i am not doing well financially,i will not put together 4503k in 3 months .Just rest

And again,i typed those messages under emotional pain .Stop acting like a slowpoke if you cant advise me

4503k and you dey brag say you dey financially well of? Dey play..
Oboy, stop being emotional. You dullard no Sabi book. Q.E.D

Exmilitant:
4503k and you dey brag say you dey financially well of? Dey play..
Oboy, stop being emotional. You dullard no Sabi book. Q.E.D

450k .ur brain should have told u that was an error .

Me dullard ?

If i am dull,i will not be an Accountant in 2 different places at a time .

You are just a jobless kid ,No need to reply u again.The funniest part is that i might be talking to a JAMBITE or a school DROP OUT .Faceless forum it is where someone living with his or her parent hurl insults at free will to someone old enough to be his or dad !!!


Bye .

Academic success is not a guarantee that someone will be successful later in life as adult.


I happen to be one of the brightest pupils during my growing up; starting from nursery to tertiary, I always came out in flying colors and I find it easy to understand anything I read even if people are shouting while I am reading, I will still understand everything. I can be gisting with you and be reading and still comprehend everything I read without much stress. I was so academically gifted to the extent that even though I attended ill equipped government Primary and secondary schools, I still excelled better than those that attended good schools.


Guess what?

I struggled for too long before making headway in life when compared to my mates who weren't academically bright.


It took me several effort, dedication, relearning, rediscovering myself and praying to God for me to finally see light in my life.



I am in my late 30s now and some of the most successful mates and friends I have today who are doing excellently well in different careers, business, etc are the olodos during our school years. Some are now big company owners. Some are getting closer to becoming Billionaires legitimately not through fraud or criminalities. These were guys that barely know what ABCD is during school days yet they are huge success in life today.



I am like the poorest among my friends who use to depend on me academically in school. I finally succeeded in life by the special grace of God almighty and through self development, hardwork and consistency and not even through my academic performance or excellence.


My point, appreciate your son because it is not his fault that he is not as bright as his mates, these things are gifts from God and mostly not learned from attending best schools even though they help.


One thing you must try now to inculcate in him is the habit of being disciplined. Let him learn to be disciplined and not end up wayward and arrogant through keeping bad companies.


Do the best you can for him to catch up, pray fervently for him daily and always bless him and leave the rest for God and his destiny.


Destiny matters most not academic excellence.


Our destiny and God's mercy is the only surest way to being successful in life, not by our academic excellence or hardwork or wisdom.

edoncast:


450k .ur brain should have told u that was an error .

Me dullard ?

If i am dull,i will not be an Accountant in 2 different places at a time .

You are just a jobless kid ,No need to reply u again.The funniest part is that i might be talking to a JAMBITE or a school DROP OUT .Faceless forum it is where someone living with his or her parent hurl insults at free will to someone old enough to be his or dad !!!


Bye .

Cry baby cry. Accountant you come dey make mistakes with figures. na your kind dey crash economy.
leave dat boy with him mama o, make you no carry your busybody spoil things.

My own is how do you comfortably cohibit together without marriage legally for a whole 10years+? A whole decade fa. Now the poor kid is been tossed from pinner to post all because his was brought to this world by irresponsible parents. Smh

Exmilitant:
4503k and you dey brag say you dey financially well of? Dey play..
Oboy, stop being emotional. You dullard no Sabi book. Q.E.D

OP, seeing how worried you sound makes me imagine how worried my Dad had been when, according to him I came home with a double-digit result in SS1 after my school was changed.

At the time, my Dad was so sad he did several things to motivate me, including promising me a phone at the time.


Fast forward, I wasn't a dullard but I failed when I changed schools and my parents were mostly unavailable. But after my Dad noticed this, he worked with me and I turned out a bright child again and excelled through the remaining classes. Today, just so I don't brag, I could easily be top three in my class.

The point is, like your sister already explained, allow your child to go back to Nursery 2. It's a foundation class, the boy is not rushing anywhere. You would be doing him a great disservice if you push him to Primary One. The competition would be too much. He would struggle in the new class and also frustrate the teacher to not "having his time".

Give him time and he'll pick up. Even if he doesn't as fast as you anticipated, continue motivating him, also realise that some kids are slow learners, and others have learning disabilities too. Besides, like someone mentioned above, we're not all cut out for academics. People can also excel in other spheres of life.

I don't support the idea of taking him back to nursery 2, the boy can be in primary 1 and with good follow up he picks up,he doesn't need to repeat to improve what he needs is good guidance,this days education in by age. Anybody that tells you no need to rush is making a mistake because there is age limit in almost everything after University education.

Let him go to basic 1 and do well to give him time and sound follow up and see him do well.

That age is still okay for Nursey 2.
He is still groom able.

Let your sis enroll him in Nursey 2 by next year he will move to Basic 1 at 6 years.

If your sister who is a teacher has assessed him and his suggesting Nursey 2, let him stay there, within 1 year he's going to do all this writing and reading stuff. Don't move him to Basic 1.

The foundation is important, if he can't get simple addition and few letter words right, he has no business going to primary 1.

By next September you would be impressed if he's well handled in a good school.

Register your child in a preferred school
It's not late

edoncast:


Let me burst your brain,

I am doing well financially i am sure .If i am not doing well financially,i will not put together 450k in 3 months .Just rest

And again,i typed those messages under emotional pain .Stop acting like a slowpoke if you cant advise me

Good response.

Coly2012:
I don't support the idea of taking him back to nursery 2, the boy can be in primary 1 and with good follow up he picks up,he doesn't need to repeat to improve what he needs is good guidance,this days education in by age. Anybody that tells you no need to rush is making a mistake because there is age limit in almost everything after University education.

Let him go to basic 1 and do well to give him time and sound follow up and see him do well.

He has to repeat Nursery 2 because he is yet to understand the content taught in Nursery 2.

franchasofficia:
Academic success is not a guarantee that someone will be successful later in life as adult.


I happen to be one of the brightest pupils during my growing up; starting from nursery to tertiary, I always came out in flying colors and I find it easy to understand anything I read even if people are shouting while I am reading, I will still understand everything. I can be gisting with you and be reading and be comprehending without much stress. I was so academically gifted to the extent that even though I attended ill equipped government Primary and secondary schools, I still excelled better than those that attended good schools.


Guess what?

I struggled for too long before making headway in life when compared to my mates who weren't academically bright.


It took me several effort, dedication, relearning, rediscovering myself and praying to God for me to finally see light in my life.



I am in my late 30s now and some of the most successful mates and friends I have today who are doing excellently well in different careers, business, etc are the olodos during our school years. Some are now big company owners. Some are getting closer to becoming Billionaires legitimately not through fraud or criminalities. These were guys that barely know what ABCD is during school days yet they are huge success in life today.



I am like the poorest among my friends who use to depend on me academically in school. I finally succeeded in life by the special grace of God almighty and through self development, hardwork and consistency and not even through my academic performance or excellence.


My point, appreciate your son because it is not his fault that he is not as bright as his mates, these things are gifts from God and mostly not learned from attending best schools even though they help.


One thing you must try now to inculcate in him is the habit of being disciplined. Let him learn to be disciplined and not end up wayward and arrogant through keeping bad companies.


Do the best you can for him to catch up, pray fervently for him daily and always bless him and leave the rest for God and his destiny.


Destiny matters most not academic excellence.


Our destiny and God's mercy is the only surest way to being successful in life, not by our academic excellence or hardwork or wisdom.

What if his destiny is tied to academic excellence? What if he becomes successful through academic excellence? You conveniently mentioned your friends that are dull and still made it but failed to mention those that are academically bright that also made it, what makes you think you and your friends example can be applied to everyone? What is wrong with being academically sound without being successful through it? What is the harm in that?

Stop discouraging people pls, let parents do what they think is right for their kids, and when the kids becomes an adult, they can decide what is right for them.

Coly2012:
I don't support the idea of taking him back to nursery 2, the boy can be in primary 1 and with good follow up he picks up,he doesn't need to repeat to improve what he needs is good guidance,this days education in by age. Anybody that tells you no need to rush is making a mistake because there is age limit in almost everything after University education.

Let him go to basic 1 and do well to give him time and sound follow up and see him do well.

1) Education is not by age

2) He has to know the basics of the nursery section especially how to read and write before jumping to primary, so the best for him is the nursery section.

LikeAking:
Forget pikin Mata. Dem no Dey give award for best parents…

Focus on making the money. Also ensure your son has high self esteem, very strong willed, sociable, talented and has deep love for the goo d things of life.

Make sure his money consciousnesses is activated.

Educated people are the poorest these days, allow your son breath.

The dysfunctionality of your upbringing is not the norm, parents are responsible for kids they bring into this world

The fact that you didn't pass through the four walls of a school doesn't mean everyone should be like you

A child is a child who should be allowed to develop at his pace, he is not an adult that should be money conscious at his age.

Biglittlelois:



1) Education is not by age

2) He has to know the basics of the nursery section especially how to read and write before jumping to primary, so the best for him is the nursery section.

Who teaches how to read and write in nursery 2?

Coly2012:

Who teaches how to read and write in nursery 2?

Teachers

Or is it in primary one he would be taught how to read and write?

Biglittlelois:



What if his destiny is tied to academic excellence? What if he becomes successful through academic excellence? You conveniently mentioned your friends that are dull and still made it but failed to mention those that are academically bright that also made it, what makes you think you and your friends example can be applied to everyone? What is wrong with being academically sound without being successful through it? What is the harm in that?

Stop discouraging people pls, let parents do what they think is right for their kids, and when the kids becomes an adult, they can decide what is right for them.

I am not saying being academically excellent is a crime, nope please, but its never a yardstick for general life success, its just one of the many things that helps one to succeed in life but it's not always a guarantee, that's why you hardly see the brightest pupils in secondary school ending up as the richest or most successful or greatest leaders or entrepreneurs later in life.



My point is, as a parent, if your child isn't academically sound during his early years, please don't despise him or cancel him and tag him as a future nodowell because it is not his or her fault that he or she is not academically bright like his mates so long as he is putting in his best and still not excelling like his mates, its not his fault, encourage him and help him discover other areas of his life like his talent, natural passion, etc that he can explore to excell in life.


How many first class graduates you know or heard of are Governors or Senators or owners of successful companies today?


How many of the best JAMB scorers of many years ago are Governors, Managing Directors, CEOs, or founders of any big tech or major company today?


Life is beyond academic excellence dear.


I speak from real life experience and as one of the pupil and student others looked upon academically. I speak as one of the brightest childs other parents used to give example and scold their own kids, and even though I finally managed to make it successful in life to a great extent, I know what it took me to overcome my life's challenges and I know how fast some of the guys we considered as dull students rose in life and made much progress than most of us that were born brainy



You may never understand

We humans worry over nothing.

franchasofficia:
I am not saying being academically excellent is a crime, nope please, but its never a yardstick for general life success, its just one of the many things that helps one to succeed in life but it's not always a guarantee, that's why you hardly see the brightest pupils in secondary school ending up as the richest or most successful or greatest leaders or entrepreneurs later in life.



My point is, as a parent, if your child isn't academically sound during his early years, please don't despise him or cancel him and tag him as a future nodowell because it is not his or her fault that he or she is not academically bright like his mates so long as he is putting in his best and still not excelling like his mates, its not his fault, encourage him and help him discover other areas of his life like his talent, natural passion, etc that he can explore to excell in life.


How many first class graduates you know or heard of are Governors or Senators or owners of successful companies today?


How many of the best JAMB scorers of many years ago are Governors, Managing Directors, CEOs, or founders of any big tech or major company today?


Life is beyond academic excellence dear.


I speak from real life experience and as one of the pupil and student others looked upon academically. I speak as one of the brightest childs other parents used to give example and scold their own kids, and even though I finally managed to make it successful in life to a great extent, I know what it took me to overcome my life's challenges and I know how fast some of the guys we considered as dull students rose in life and made much progress than most of us that were born brainy



You may never understand

Academic excellence or the lack of it is not a yardstick for one to succeed in life, nothing guarantees anything, that's the fact of life, we are make the best of the skills and knowledge we possess to succeed in life, that doesn't mean we shouldnt make effort whether through school and other ways, if through school make the best of it, not through school, also make the best of it

The problem of Op's son is not that he's not bright, his mother was negligent of his schooling to the extent of not knowing how to read and write, and Op has decided to train the boy, and there is nothing wrong with that, so I don't understand why you're talking about failure and what not when there is nothing here to indicate that, who would want to have a child that does not read and write in this 21st century when there is always an option to improve? Or how is he suppose to navigate through life without knowing how to read and write?

Again, your experience is not the basis for everyone, there is no one on this earth that hasn't gone through struggles and challenges in this life, both the rich and poor, we all go through challenges, you are not the first academically bright man that has gone through challenges, neither will you be the last, illiterates go through challenges too, everyone will pass through that phase, I'm for people to be educated, so that when one door closes, there will be other options to fall back on.

If I read clearly, you said your ex came visiting and you two continued with the amorous act? Neglecting the most important thing which is your son's education and now you're saying you're doomed?. The both of you are not serious if sex is still the paramount thing in your agenda now that you should be thinking of shaping that boys future early. And stop sounding weak like moving out of your current apartment is the solution to everything because she'll end up finding your new location and still come with distractions again to turn you from your focus if you don't stand your grounds and be firm on your decisions. Be in control.

As for your boy, at that age he should be in basic one and be able to read and write very well but since he can't there's nothing he's going to do in basic 1 as he won't be able to cope because his foundation is weak. So he needs to go back to nursery 2 where he'll be prepped very well for basic 1 in word building and introduction of sight words to improve his reading and language skills including simple arithmetic. If all these are not in place, sorry. He'll find it difficult and no body has time to start teaching all that from the scratch again cos they'll assume all that has been taught in preparatory class.

Better focus on that boys education now that hes still in the developmental stage before it's too late for him to grab again.

Biglittlelois:



Academic excellence or the lack of it is not a yardstick for one to succeed in life, nothing guarantees anything, that's the fact of life, we are make the best of the skills and knowledge we possess to succeed in life, that doesn't mean we shouldnt make effort whether through school and other ways, if through school make the best of it, not through school, also make the best of it

The problem of Op's son is not that he's not bright, his mother was negligent of his schooling to the extent of not knowing how to read and write, and Op has decided to train the boy, and there is nothing wrong with that, so I don't understand why you're talking about failure and what not when there is nothing here to indicate that, who would want to have a child that does not read and write in this 21st century when there is always an option to improve? Or how is he suppose to navigate through life without knowing how to read and write?

Again, your experience is not the basis for everyone, there is no one on this earth that hasn't gone through struggles and challenges in this life, both the rich and poor, we all go through challenges, you are not the first academically bright man that has gone through challenges, neither will you be the last, illiterates go through challenges too, everyone will pass through that phase, I'm for people to be educated, so that when one door closes, there will be other options to fall back on.

The Op's son is too young for him or you to conclude that he cannot read or write.


He is just 5. Not all 5 year olds will learn how to read and write even if you enrol them at Harvard Nursery or Primary school, it is how they are created and most times you cannot do anything about it.


When I was in JSS 3, many of my classmates couldn't read or write, yet they ended up successful later in life. That was the reason I wrote what I wrote.



I had a boy in my area while growing up who lost his parents at 2, he was brought to his father's brother who happened to be our neighbor. That boy wasn't enrolled into Nursery until he was almost 10, and that boy learned to read and write at home while some boys who came from better background and were enrolled in good schools couldn't read still. I still remember one day one of the dull boy's mom was scolding him using the other brilliant boy as an example, she recounted all her efforts to make sure he did well in school to no avail.



A bright kid will be bright when enrolled in the best school or not.



Haven't you wondered why Nigerians from remote villages who managed to graduate and find their way abroad ended up.becoming best graduating students while the white kids who had wonderful educational backgrounds from childhood struggled to pass?



I repeat, academic excellence is never a criteria for success later in life.


In some cases, academic excellence makes people to become lazy and uncreative, relying only on their academic excellence which most times fail them in our current world

Do whatever you can to help him grow, he’s your pride and joy. His positive development will give you joy and happiness, you’re his father don’t give up on him, please