A farmers son was returning from the market with a crate containing chickens which his father entrusted to him to bring back home. All of a sudden the crate fell and broke open and all the chickens escaped in every direction. The determined any scouted round the whole neighbourhood and collected all the wayward chickens and put them back into the now repaired crate and headed home expecting the worst:
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BOY: "pa, the chickens got loose", the any confessed sadly, "but i managed to catch all 15 of them back"
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PA: "well, you did really good son", the farmer beamed, "YOU LEFT THE MARKET WITH JUST 7 CHICKENS"

not still funny

^^^ can you lick the sand under your feet and swear while holding a bible that you did not laugh? Ok.
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You all know that Ghadaffi is dead, this is the latest transcript that was recieved from his discussion with Abacha in hell:
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Ghadaffi: ahh, my broda how u dey?
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Abacha: Gada wellcome oh, i dey try hold body, how your journey na? U been teeh oh, i don wait u tire.
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Ghadaffi: aboki i been dey try gather plenty money, chei! E nor easy oh, those people do me strong thing.
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Abacha: na because u fulk up na, na u dull urself , abi u nor know?
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Ghadaffi: ah oga, how i take 4lk up na?
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Abacha: see u, u thief many money, even pass d one wey i thief, why u no run wen yawa gas?
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Ghadafi: u sabi say moni and power dey sweet person well well nah, i been dey do like u nah, i been think say any person wey try me go die.
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Abacha: na him make u still dey there dey stand? Even wen this Obama guy enta the mata, u dey craze? Well, no wahala, welcome sha. U don learn ur lesson. U no see as i been do my own? U nor see say my people no fit make noise until dat winch ashawo carry him own come?
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Ghadafi: ah! aboki i hail u oh, na true. See abeg u go teach me as u take do am e hear.
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Abacha: i dey vex for u, u nor just try, me i been thief 150billion in just 5 years wen u u thief 200billion in 42 years. If to say i be you i for don buy spiritual fire extinguisher wey i for carr come this place. Abeg come follow me chop this 'hot coal', na the best food the week be this and 1 week dey long well well for here.

mstchew

my wife came home yesterday and shouted excitedly:
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WIFE: "quick, pack your bags, i just won 20 million in the national lottery"
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MAN: "oh that is great honey, where are we going?" he asked smiling
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WIFE: "what is WE? just pack your bags and GET THE HELL OUT you useless man"

The funniest thing about this thread is Ajibel. His comments have me laughing.

A guy is riding the bus when at a stop he sees the most beautiful woman ever. The only problem was that she was a nun. He decides to approach her anyway, "sister, you are very beautiful and i really want to 4lk you" he says, "im sorry but i have given my body to the Lord" the nun replied getting off the bus. Suddenly the bus driver turns to the guy and says "i know a way you can catch her man" and the bus driver then tells the guy how the nun goes to confession by 3pm everyday and updates the guy with a plan and he leaves the bus happy knowing he will catch the nun soon.
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The next day the guy is in the confession booth dressed as a priest when the nun approaches, in the darkness he says "sister, God has told me that i must have s e x with you" and she replied "well, if God says it them we must do it but because of my strong commitment to the Lord i will only take it up my arze", the guy figures this is not a bad idea and then proceeds to have the best s e x ever in his life. After its over he whips off his outfit and yells "surprise, i am the guy from the bus yesterday" and then the nun whips off her own gown, turns around and screams "surprise, I AM THE BUS DRIVER"

Its 2 o'clock in the morning and a couple are still in bed sleeping when their bedside telephone rings. The husband picks up the reciever and before he could say anything some talking came from the other end of the line , the husband then angrily says "how the hell do i know - what do you think i am? a weatherman?", and with that he slams the recieves back down on the telephone. The wife rolls over and asks "who was that sweety?" and the husband replied "i dont know, it was some foolish bloke who wanted to know if THE COAST WAS CLEAR"

^^ Funny.

Nice One Nkechi, sorry, Lilkech. Especially the Nun joke. The fact that Pretiebo and Ajibole are always on your back is an indication that they are your number one fans. Thumbs Up.

Nice One Nkechi, sorry, Lilkech. Especially the Nun joke. The fact that Pretiebo and Ajibole are always on your back is an indication that they are your number one fans. Thumbs Up.

^^^ thank you kay 'CASPER', its good to know some sane ghosts still hover around NL

lilkech peeps in here too , cozy! i think il begin right away, haterz 'clear road' oh