Is it proper to date a Muslim lady as a Christian?

Na wa. my case and yours appears similar.

my own baaaby is here on NL and a muslim but she's still doing agidi to me.

but God go touch her heart sha

Awwww, I empathize with you.  You have to work on your parents to give you their minimal blessing, it must be so difficult I know. The only way for you to come close to achieving that is to continue to be a dutiful son to your parents. The only thing you should dissassociate yourself from in terms of your family is religious acts but all other things that do not fall under religious worship you engage with them positively. Don't ask for a big wedding, just a small one with all the key parties involved. Your wife too should be a good advert in terms of her behaviour. It is normal for her to be afraid of you and your family trying to convert her- I pray you will not turn-out like that.

I will not lie to you, the both of you need to probably change the city where you live or travel out of the country to have some space after the wedding.

By the way, if you have 'accepted Islam in totality' as you say, you should have selected a Muslim name for yourself by now. It is not something you do on the day of Nikah. Please clarify this position.

thanks

Every other nigerian relationship i see these days has one weird story.

What's going on?

Is this due to emigration and foreign influences? People are just rebelling against everything they know and were raised with, one way or the other.

By emigration i actually mean westenization, or outside influences.

If u converted to muslim b4 u met your wife to be, your reason for converting would have sounded a bit more convincing but not after u met her.
Having said that, dont c why she should be jittery and u confused. Just go ahead and marry.Its for better for worse.

Let talk about the positive, before we talk about anything else.

Alhamdulillah that Allah gave you Islam, in spite of the way you were introduced to it. Please always, on your own for yourself for the sake of Allah hang on that inner conviction that blessed you with Islam, by Allah's Mercy.

It is not necessary that you have arabic name, but a good and meaningful name is Islamic name, just as well. Example is Salman [a persian name] Al Farsi, and many others. Even Abu Huraira [father of the cat].

Furhter, it is not necessary that the muslim father insist that your parents become Muslim before you get married. After all, Islam must come from the heart, not just the tongue.

What you need to do is to display Islam to your parents and InshaAllah before they die become muslims, because that is what will make your relation continues with them after they have passed; your ability to pray for their forgiveness, etc, if they die as muslims.

Maclatunji gave a very good advice of possible hijra [move to another place], upon your marriage. The land of Allah is vast and you are not restricted to a locality of your birth, even, if it is place of evil deeds; like disbelief, etc.

You need good company. Those who will be your support, guide for you against evil deeds and encourages you towards good.

Your potential wife should not be concern about you since you are already a muslim. You should improve yourself in Islam and mingle with more muslims, making more friends from their rank, learning more about Islam, like taking up the learning of recitation of Quran in Arabic.

All of these efforts will be seen as your seriousness in this religion by your future partner.


You should tell her that your parents are not going to be her partner, but are and they have no right to obligate her go to church. You should move out as soon as you can, especially just before you marry so that your Islam, your marriage can have a better chance of getting big and strong root, standing firm and not easy to be uprooted.

Finally, don't act ignorant by getting intimate with her. If you used to do it, she is at fault the reason she is concern about your parent and even you, even after your reversion to Islam. Show her that you care and get to know her father more. It is you that is their primary relation by marriage.

I am happy for you. May Allah make you strong, make you guys stronger and make your love affair last, into eternity in Paradise where both of you will be houri for each other.



@Toba; His story is unlike yours. He is a muslim who muslim woman is permissible to. You on the other hand is a pure nasara, stiff necked man trying to get a believing woman; making her committing fornication each time you get with her since your being a Kufar will not make the marriage legal with Allah.

Is the story for toba's benefit?

@sweetnetcar,thanks

tpia@:

Is the story for toba's benefit?

No, it is for Tpiah's benefit

My brother, may Allah continue to keep you in Islam. i am certain that your father has no ability to make you a non muslim now that you are almost a college graduate. Soon, you will be too old to be spanked if not already, and become a friend that your father may ask his opinion in matters important to him.

Your father in law to be should not be concern with your father, right now, but only on you and how you will make his daughter a good partner, somebody that will not be oppressed. Again, your good value will be the ingredient, inshaAllah that will tip over your parents and indeed the whole household into Islam. I have seen it happen that somebody brought the light of Islam and sooner than later every heart in the bloodline accepted it.

@SWEETNETCAR, Thanks once again for your brilliant advice and words of encouragement. I am not a student ooo . I am a graduate and presently working in one of the banks in Nigeria, so my dad cannot even spank me.

Don't be too sure about that

so topefisayo, i also hope that you have already moved out of the house.

but you can marry your future wife now. just because you are married does not mean pregnancy has to happen, right away.

but you need to start to make the bond of marriage take root, right away.

and having children is a good thing. it is very Islamic to be married and Allah provides the children.

i wish you well and abundance of good.

@topefisayo: "Be Positive" Barkallahufi.

Come away come away
I see the enemies around you
Come away come away
I see them trying to devour you

maclatunji:

By the way, if you have 'accepted Islam in totality' as you say, you should have selected a Muslim name for yourself by now. It is not something you do on the day of Nikah. Please clarify this position.

A person who converted to Islam does not need to change his name. Hoever if the name embodies the worship of someone or some thing other than Goe needs to change it.
Thus if the original name does not comprise or imply something forbidden in Islam., then he or she is permitted to retain it.
However, some say it is preferable to change ones name to an Islamic name it will also distinguish him or her from the non -Muslims. But it is not manatory.

maclatunji:

By the way, if you have 'accepted Islam in totality' as you say, you should have selected a Muslim name for yourself by now. It is not something you do on the day of Nikah. Please clarify this position.

sorry, a lot of typos in my earlier post.

A person who converted to Islam does not need to change his name. However if the name embodies the worship of someone or some thing other than God then he needs to change it.

Thus if the original name does not comprise or imply something forbidden in Islam., then he or she is permitted to retain it.
However, some say it is preferable to change ones name to an Islamic name as it will distinguish him or her from the non -Muslims. But it is not mandatory.