This is a religous thread - a place where we can anonymously come and discuss and gain better understanding and explanation. At least that is what it ought to be. It is not every thread created that is meant to incite hate and bashing . .some of us just want to discuss and understand things better. I cannot go to the church leadership to ask these questions cos they might label me a rebel.

So, having said that, here is my question

"What God has joined together, let no man put asunder"

Why do some churches put aside this biblical phrase and deal with only one member of a family?:


  - They make a wife or husband a deacon without at least informing the spouse

  - They call a wife or husband and tell them they want to use their house for home cell fellowship  . .without consulting the spouse

  - They assign a volunteer job to a husband or wife without consulting with the other party. . .this is a job that will definately take precious time away from the family.

  - They send out separate letters (to the husband and wife) when it is time for seeds and donations.



Can someone please explain why this is so?

I understand some posters may tend to turn this into a bashing thread - that is not my aim nor am I in control of it. Please ignore such posts.

Hopefully we can talk about this in a mature way.

Its just human nature to constantly try to break apart marriages.

Christians are no exception and in fact many churchgoers make it their mission to destroy homes.

I'm a christian but i'll still tell it like it is.

And poster plz do not develop an attitude because i'm posting on a thread started by you.

lol

Why do you expect me to develop an attitude?

You made a valuable contribution to the thread.

Thank you for the post . . and telling it like it is.

Hmm . . .
I'm failing to see why this is primarily the fault of the church. Husbands & wives have 100% control over what comes into their home/marriage.
 

kokoye:

  - They make a wife or husband a deacon without at least informing the spouse

  - They call a wife or husband and tell them they want to use their house for home cell fellowship  . .without consulting the spouse

  - They assign a volunteer job to a husband or wife without consulting with the other party. . .this is a job that will definately take precious time away from the family.

  - They send out separate letters (to the husband and wife) when it is time for seeds and donations.

  It should be up to wife/husband to discuss these issues/developments with their spouse before proceeding to do the bidding of the church. If a husband/wife goes ahead and schedules house fellowship or accepts church responsibilities or financial obligations without the consent or knowledge of his/her spouse the problem lies with the marriage not the church.

^^^

You are right.

Some people take control of their households . . but some are called rebels when they try to go against the will of the church. . .so these vulnerable types keep quiet and suffer inside.

But   . .back to your post. . what is the church . . a place where we can gather for encouragement and upliftment . . a place that preaches the same phrase I have up there . . ?

I am not blaming the church. I'm just trying to find out why some church leadership(s) do this - there may be valid reasons for it.

I am totally against so-called christians whho make it their mission to wander around like satan seeking whom to destroy.

Its very unfortunate that the worldly attitude of being anti-marriage and anti-family is the same spirit of ungodliness professed by many if not most church goers.

I find it sickening the way people tend to behave sometimes.

Unbelievers at least have the excuse of not knowing Christ. What excuse do most of these so-called christians have?

And this attitude is found across all levels of the church- what a disaster and shameless state of affairs.

When good becomes bad and immorality is the norm, then i wonder why people will keep fooling themselves that they are christians.

Just go hang out at clubs or strip joints already, take drugs, drink and stop denying yourselves of anything at all since your hearts and minds are filthier than people in other lifestyles.

That is my two cents and i'll be back with more.

Anyone who doesnt like what i say can attack me if they're so inclined.

It doesnt change the truth and neither will it change your judgement.

kokoye:

^^^
You are right.

Some people take control of their households . . but some are called rebels when they try to go against the will of the church. . .so these vulnerable types keep quiet and suffer inside.

But they are adults now . . .  if the church is not acting appropriately they can leave and go to a different one abi?

But . .back to your post. . what is the church . . a place where we can for encouragement and upliftment . . a place that preaches the same phrase I have up there . . ?

Million dollar question. One thing is for sure, many of today's modern churches are far far away from the biblical examples we have.

I am not blaming the church. I'm just trying to find out why some church leadership(s) do this - there may be valid reasons for it.

My guess is to maximize their output, treat them as individuals - rather than the family unit that they are, you'll get more for your effort  .

OP, Firstly, you've quoted the verse wrongly.
Secondly, it'll surprise you that you're actually the one separating them. Because the understanding should be, if they are one, then you should not treat them as two. If the wife has been told, it's that the husband has also being told. What you do to the husband, you've also done for the wife. What you do for the church you've done for Jesus, and vice versa. That's the mystery of the husband-wife relationship. It depends on where you're looking from, your perspective.

^^^

I dont see it that way . . because of somethings I have personally witnessed (not directly at me). . . you call a spouse to sit in front without inviting the other party. . . or you celebrate a spouse without mentioning the other party at all.

But guess what, I dont want to push this further, since it may appear as something else to some people.

Thank you for your words of wisdom.

God bless.

tpia@:

Its just human nature to constantly try to break apart marriages.

Christians are no exception and in fact many churchgoers make it their mission to destroy homes.

I'm a christian but i'll still tell it like it is.

And poster plz do not develop an attitude because i'm posting on a thread started by you.

no, it is not human nature to go around seeking to break up unions. speak for yourself tpia. maybe it is your nature. don't think we don't notice you going around getting into NLD couples' business. mzdark+190 for example. anywhere it appears there has been a connection, tpia is there trying to cause trouble. so bitter and jealous. you deserve that people here can't stand you. you are so hateful and ignorant. all the time hiding under tradition and christianity and spreading ignorance and ruining good threads. get a life outside of the computer because no one here will ever give you the time. they can see you for your real motives.

tpia@:

I am totally against so-called christians whho make it their mission to wander around like satan seeking whom to destroy.

Its very unfortunate that the worldly attitude of being anti-marriage and anti-family is the same spirit of ungodliness professed by many if not most church goers.

I find it sickening the way people tend to behave sometimes.

Unbelievers at least have the excuse of not knowing Christ. What excuse do most of these so-called christians have?

And this attitude is found across all levels of the church- what a disaster and shameless state of affairs.

When good becomes bad and immorality is the norm, then i wonder why people will keep fooling themselves that they are christians.

Just go hang out at clubs or strip joints already, take drugs, drink and stop denying yourselves of anything at all since your hearts and minds are filthier than people in other lifestyles.

That is my two cents and i'll be back with more.

Anyone who doesnt like what i say can attack me if they're so inclined.

the pot calling the kettle black.

^Are you sane?

Back to topic

if you're helping satan do his job, then why exactly do you still feel you belong in a church?

To complete your mission?

tpia@:

Back to topic

if you're helping satan do his job, then why exactly do you still feel you belong in a church?

To complete your mission?

What exactly is wrong with you??

Did you read the OP at all? Was he not just asking for an explanation?

What has Satan and his mission got to do with the OP and his intention to seek clarification?

^you and yours arent going to derail the thread, even if you shout louder than this.

tpia@:

^you and yours arent going to derail the thread, even if you shout louder than this.

Unfortunately, you beat me to it!!!

Wbb.

So, from the responses i'm seeing here, you devilish ones know exactly what you're doing, but oro okunkun inu elede lon gbe, as they say. Ko gbodo so jade, because the day the pig opens its mouth to say these things, e don finish foram be that.

Interesting!!!

tpia@:

Wbb.

So, from the responses i'm seeing here, you devilish ones know exactly what you're doing, but oro okunkun inu elede lon gbe, as they say. Ko gbodo so jade, because the day the pig opens its mouth to say these things, e don finish foram be that.

Interesting!!!

I repeat, what exactly is your problem!!!! 

Dude, you need help.

@Kokoye, apologies

You were right though, It appears as something else to some people.

Insidious individuals under the cloak of Christianity, however do continue to question what you feel is not right using any medium you feel comfortable in. 

Cheers.

^^^

Apologies for what . .giving personal opinions on this thread??

Naa, that is what forums like this are meant for.

Thanks for Nairaland . . I have learnt that people have different opinions . . we see a color and have different names for it

And yes, I am not perfect and still earning. I will ask questions when I feel there is a need to.

And yes, I dont expect everyone to take things the way I do . . that's life.

And I will not judge anyone based on their posts or comments.

God be with us all.

@Jesoul:

Respects, Ma'am!

@Dare2think:

Happy new year(s)

@Topic: I think its the fault of couples. While true that some are timid and don't wish to rock the boat ever, the other partner should complement and help weakness become strength!

If nuclear would not greet me after such alongtime, i'll greet him by fire by force. Nuclear, happy new year o.

Ah, Image,

Really sorry - twas initially like a fleeting cursory visit & my frame of mind was not settled! Happy new year, my brother and God bless you and yours 500% more than ever before.

I re-read your post again now and while in a way I agree with it, we also have to agree that the fear of going against "authority" does at times force what may seem like separation between spouses! One may be more scared of annoying God's representative more than the other thus implying a split caused by that authority

Think about it!

kokoye:

^^^

Apologies for what . .giving personal opinions on this thread??
 

The apology was for 'almost derailing your thread'.

You know, some people should actually be visiting the hospital for mental diagnostic checks. The rate of demented people on Nairaland is really alarming and religion is often used to cover up their deep issues.

Anyway, point taken.
Take care.

nuclearboy:

@Dare2think:

Happy new year(s)

How far dude, I see you have reduced your appearance on the religion section, lol I really don't blame you. Mixing with a lot of 'demented' individuals can actually make you question your own sanity.

Anyways, same ol' same ol'. Still dealing with them fraudsters, charlatans, deluded followers, deceptive individuals and so on.  Like I stated in a previous post, with some its either the height of delusion or the weight of deception that drives them. Well, its their problem. But they cant just come on a public forum and spew lies expecting not to be challenged.

Some people make this section worthwhile though, jesoul, enigma, justcool,deepsight, mazaje, Martian,goshen and some few notable ones are people whose posts you expect to learn a thing or two. As for some other self-righteous insidious individuals, expect nothing tangible from them (am sure you know this anyway). Except of course one would like to be as foolish or as deceptive as them. Harsh but true.

Cheers dude,
Hope you pop around more often

If you belong to a local assembly and not quite okay with some of the issues it's your responsibility to ask your pastor but in the right manner.

dare2think:

The apology was for 'almost derailing your thread'.

You know, some people should actually be visiting the hospital for mental diagnostic checks. The rate of demented people on Nairaland is really alarming and religion is often used to cover up their deep issues.

Anyway, point taken.
Take care.

I work on the traffic team in church - we control the traffic and guide people to park properly. But still, some tenured church members would deliberately park on double lanes, daring anybody to correct them, while some would lash out at you when you tell them to slow down so as not to hit pedestrians. Some of these people have major issues at home - they bring the pain and anger with them to church. Are we supposed to fight them in return? No, we try to calm them down and let them smile . . or simply walk away if need be. I have learnt the art of doing that

Think of Nairaland as an avenue for some to release tension . . a place where people can anonymously derive joy from dishing out hate and pain. . . since it seems to make their life better.

Some cannot stand anyone opposing their views or analyzing what they hold sacred.

But you know what, that is the true beauty of this anonymous forum. I have learnt to understand and deal with personalities as needed.

I used to be very emotional and would get provoked easily. But I have been able to put all that under subjection now because I tolerate personalities more. . . and I know how, who and when to ignore . . that's no sin

Have a great day and God bless.

dare2whine and his co-cultists

Lets try to stay on topic plz.

I think the title of thread is clear enough- it cant any clearer than that.

If you have personal issues or grudges, malice, whatever, with anybody, take it elsewhere.

@ topic

Those of you who feel angry, bitter, annoyed, vengeful, etc whenever you see a couple, what are your reasons for feeling that way?


Note, this question isnt only for singles- there are also others in relationships of their own who are also into this lifestyle of homewrecking other people's homes.

Also, this doesnt include relationships where someone  (usually the easygoing party) was elbowed out of the way to make room for some fish from lord knows where. Neither am i referring to relationships that had k leg from the getgo.

-Sighs-

People Pls what has this;

kokoye:

This is a religous thread - a place where we can anonymously come and discuss and gain better understanding and explanation. At least that is what it ought to be. It is not every thread created that is meant to incite hate and bashing . .some of us just want to discuss and understand things better. I cannot go to the church leadership to ask these questions cos they might label me a rebel.

So, having said that, here is my question

"What God has joined together, let no man put asunder"

[b]Why do some churches put aside this biblical phrase and deal with only one member of a family?:


  - They make a wife or husband a deacon without at least informing the spouse

  - They call a wife or husband and tell them they want to use their house for home cell fellowship  . .without consulting the spouse

  - They assign a volunteer job to a husband or wife without consulting with the other party. . .this is a job that will definately take precious time away from the family.

  - They send out separate letters (to the husband and wife) when it is time for seeds and donations.



Can someone please explain why this is so[/b]?

I understand some posters may tend to turn this into a bashing thread - that is not my aim nor am I in control of it. Please ignore such posts.

Hopefully we can talk about this in a mature way.

Got to do with this;

tpia@:

Those of you who feel angry, bitter, annoyed, vengeful, etc whenever you see a couple, what are your reasons for feeling that way?


Note, this question isnt only for singles- there are also others in relationships of their own who are also into this lifestyle of homewrecking other people's homes.

Also, this doesnt include relationships where someone  (usually the easygoing party) was elbowed out of the way. Neither am i referring to relationships that had k leg from the getgo.

Or this;

tpia@:

Back to topic

if you're helping satan do his job, then why exactly do you still feel you belong in a church?

To complete your mission?

Once again, what exactly is your problem? Are you ok?
Seriously, joke aside.

I need radio code:
Vin: 1hgcd5553ta230862
Serial: 93c1024765

Thank you

^^  

Anyway, I always was around! Stepped back to see what direction things would go in but was there

I do agree some make it worthwhile and our "dementos" remain too!  

@samg515:

make your request in the AUTOS section

Nucleardear, double respects sir
Good to see you around. I hope everything is peaches and ice-cream and your bread is bending under the weight of serious butter. It is well.

kokoye:

I work on the traffic team in church - we control the traffic and guide people to park properly. But still, some tenured church members would deliberately park on double lanes, daring anybody to correct them, while some would lash out at you when you tell them to slow down so as not to hit pedestrians. Some of these people have major issues at home - they bring the pain and anger with them to church. Are we supposed to fight them in return? No, we try to calm them down and let them smile . . or simply walk away if need be. I have learnt the art of doing that

Think of Nairaland as an avenue for some to release tension . . a place where people can anonymously derive joy from dishing out hate and pain. . . since it seems to make their life better.

Some cannot stand anyone opposing their views or analyzing what they hold sacred.

But you know what, that is the true beauty of this anonymous forum. I have learnt to understand and deal with personalities as needed.

I used to be very emotional and would get provoked easily. But I have been able to put all that under subjection now because I tolerate personalities more. . . and I know how, who and when to ignore . . that's no sin

Have a great day and God bless.

Commendable. A very mature approach to NL 'foruming'. Or else one will just be upset all the time lol.

dare2groan

its quite obvious your problems are beyond what anybody on nl can help you with.

so, maybe you want to keep it moving and land yourself elsewhere.

dont make the thread about you and your issues, thanks.

my first post which you quoted, was meant for you, not kokoye.

i think anyone with a little sense would have seen that.

see how you rope yourself in your hurry to be a nitwit?

na oversabi dey finish una.