pls i nid ur advice fellow nairalanders: suppose you impregnated a girl while she's still in school, making her drp out. till she had her baby you refused to agree you own the pregnancy,making her go through lots of stress. finally you went to her parent because she left lagos for village for a year and you need to see ur baby where they are staying. she's back in lagos after disturbing her, but the catch is you dont love her even though she's very pretty.

again you are a graduate , while she's a secondary school drop out who sometimes misfires grammar, can not read properly nor write. she's however very nice though with typical women problem. the catch in she comes in weekend to stay, and do the you know, my parents like her now and i dont want her anymore. already i have sent her to a fashion design institute to learn. both our religion and tribe are different, she's not also coping well with her new religion. i have hurt her many times, i cant bare to do it again. how do i let her go without hurting her again.

I don't like the way you talk about her, you are educated and all but you were having sex with her. At that point you did not consider all these things abi?

Why is she sent to learn your religion and tribe? Is she your slave? Are you learning her religion and tribe? You really have got some issues.

Anyway to the topic, I suggest you think clearly about your decision . . . you have not been doing this for a long time. If you so decide you are not happy with her, then you should talk to her, your parents and her parents. Something should be legally worked out with respect to her well keep and the baby.

And please stop treating and talking about her like she is some kind of lower class trash, treat her with respect.

Get this thread out now!!!

You  know she misfire grammar sometimes, couldn't read nor write well. . . . . and some other annoyin things you said about her and why did you impregnate her Man you don cr**ze! Better get the post off this thread before pple curse you, opps! sorry I forgot to say that YOU ARE HEARTLESS!!

start expectn repercursi0nz ! U are a disgrace 2 humanity !

Hey Guyz dont be harsh at him, just a mistake , hahahahaha,

The answer is : You don't!
Not with your outlook on her and your apparent outlook on life. Massive reforms are necessary on your part - else your next relationship will end up in a similar fashion. If you can't marry her, don't sleep with her. It's been my motto since adolescent days and appears to work just fine. What if your next romp ends in an "accident" and she ends up pregnant as well. And subsequently you discover she's a lousy cook. Or holds your parents in disdain. What would you then do? Castrate yourself? The moral of the story is "look before you leap"

To the house at large, let the fall of a yellow leaf be a warning to the green ones.

@ hafees

Set up something reasonable for your baby-mama and for your kid. Only then would backing out be an alternative. A lawyer might be necessary. I'm an ardent believer of "a broken relationship is better (infinitely so) than a broken marriage".


Fix up your wrongs - then take a bow . . . .

I don't understand?
Is she a game character?
Did you meet her while playing games?
Did you guys make d baby on top of a ps3/psp/N64?

I'm just trying to see how exactly this relates to gaming.

oh,i believe u r talking about Lara croft or Jill Valentine or some other game heroes.but this heroes are Educated,not illitrate like u who posted a topic in games,which shuld not be. . .u beter delete ths topic or do smth u heartless fool,a graduate goin around wit illitrates: its pure nonsense. . . .i know u aint educated.get lost outta outtanaira land fool. . . .

I can trust nairaland users for setting this buffoon straight.
Come here talking about a fellow human like she were some sorry being in need of you.
who do you think you are?

who says because you have virile spermatozoa that automatically means this girl should stick with you?
fa fa fa foul!
Too bad she was only in secondary school when you decided to ruin her life
And rather that hide your sorry face in shame,you come here asking us what to do yet you are sleeping with the girl you don't love knowing how vulnerable and lowly she feels of herself,having a kid out of wedlock and being reduced to a secondary school drop out at the mercies of a miserable sperm donor.
You are not only "sending" her to school but also forcing a new religion on her without any plans for her future.
May you reap whatever you sow.

Shame on you
Shame on that apparatus in between your legs

wild animals also impregnate their females,you have done nothing unique

do you blame him? ladies should know how to say NO pls carry your blokus dey go.

poster, there is no way to leave the mother of your baby.

When you were enjoying the ride you didnt remember that she misfires grammer then?
Marry her and take care of your son. . . that is what real men do, not sowing wild oats everywhere and then coming here to solicit advice on how to dump a woman that went through hell for you.

Sometimes i read these threads and i'm grateful i didnt turn out female. 9 months of pregnancy for someone like you? What a waste.

clicked on the guys profile,he has a website and a business and is not man to do the the right thing.
why did he bother bringing her back from the village,stringing her along just to sleep with her.
Perhaps she would have found someone who would treat her like a lady.
Someone who would value her and not use her like a piece of trash.
And have the guts to ask perfect strangers what to do with her.

what child did she have?
a boy or girl?
If a girl,would you want a man to do her like you've shamelessly done her mother.
Do you have sisters and how would you want a man like you to wickedly use them?

I dislike you immensely and I don't even know you.
You will surely get your due reward.

First of all you are a useless goat! Her secondary school statue didnt stop you from gbenshing her in the first place abi?


Anyway you are an adult its not by force to be with someone, yes the situation is sticky now there is a baby involved, but since you say you are a graduate, your grammer betta past her own, you don send am to fashion institute, you can also afford to dey take care of you piken. Use all this graduate learning wey you get to tell her its over, but abeg take care of you child o!

There is nothing wrong with her personality, but you want to leave her because she dropped out of school.

And the reason she dropped out of school is that you impregnated her. Yeah, you're a disgrace to humanity.

After making her a srop out you want to leave her? You are indeed a disgrace to manhood and humaity in general.

If you leave her, i'll say you are calous and wicked.
You have to marry her, send her to school, no one is above education, we learn everyday.
Love her and treat as a wife.

Everything that has happened to her is all your fault so why leave her to her fate? Man come on be wise and matured.

DONT YOU DARE LEAVE HER OR YOU ARE GOING TO REGRET IT FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE

again you are a graduate , while she's a secondary school drop out who sometimes misfires grammar, can not read properly nor write. she's however very nice though with typical women problem. the catch in she comes in weekend to stay, and do the you know,

She comes to the house to do some you know abi? Just look at yourself.
Why not send her to school so that she can uderstand your gramma too abi na crime make she sabi speak grammar?

You have to do something to help her cause you caused everything that has befallen her. Shame on you.

If you dont do something to harness this situtation remember she carried that baby for nine months so u have nine curses on you already.

Anoda trash been posted

He is indeed a disgrace to humanity.

from my own view, since he said he cant mary the lady, i think he should leave her but to be taking care of the baby.
coz this guy can harm or even kill this lady if forced to marry her.

make we remember say this na marriage issue no be mere relationship o!!!!

some pple can just be inconsiderate and self centered

U should be ashamed of yourself. Did u recognize all those faults u r telling us when u finally slept with her. If u think she is not that educated, what made u go to her in the first place, sick bastard, sorry am just pissed at you.

I think u should leave the poor girl alone, she has more dignity than u and y must she learn your religion anyways, isnt hers good enough for you, ooh i forgot she aint educated, so u think your religion is more better and good for her, come on, with your degree, u should go back to University and take a course on how to treat people with respect.

Now that the baby is big u r claiming its yours, MEN, its men like u that make us women not to want any other men, because of your selfishness and stupid egos.

For once be a Man and be responsible for your baby and oh yeah, leave the poor mother alone. She deserves better than you. NONSENSE!!

wat has happened has happened so i am not condemning you. that does no good.
But u have a responsibility to take good care of that child and her mother.

Yes u dun love her anymore, you dun have to keep sleeping with her.
But you have to set them up properly,

He is indeed a disgrace to humanity.

from my own view, since he said he can't mary the lady, i think he should leave her but to be taking care of the baby.
because this guy can harm or even kill this lady if forced to marry her.

make we remember say this na marriage issue no be mere relationship o!!!!
[quote][/quote]
its unfair and very painful 2 d lady,u've really hurt her, where did u want her 2 start again now
dis world is full of a wicked people.u are indeed a graduate sry 2 say.thank God u accept d baby,jst make sure
u take care of d baby.

It's guys like you that make the ladies haters. when you wre sleeping with her and wrecking her life you didn't know she was a semi-illiterate. you should have left her in the villa to heal up cos time heals all wounds. You went to bring her, gave her hope and want to dump her again. you've forgotten that no sin will ever go unpunished. may God not forgive you. can i hear anybody say a resounding AMEN!!!!!!!!!!

Acts fast man. All nairalanders are over you.

You can't keep leaving that lady to suffer just like that. Do something man

Amen, sister!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Temmie10:

what has happened has happened so i am not condemning you. that does no good.
But u have a responsibility to take good care of that child and her mother.

Yes u dun love her anymore, you dun have to keep sleeping with her.
But you have to set them up properly,

So far, this is the most reasonable post on this thread. Everyother person has only come to display his or her anger, as if that is what matters now. Stop pretending you all. How many girls have you all slept with? Did you plan to marry them? Have girls not aborted for you? Just because you were not a casuality, you all now came out ranting and raining curses, meanwhile you all are kettle calling pots black.

My brother, the deed is already done. Stop anyother immoral acts with the girl. If you dont love her, dont marry her. Dont marry for sentiments. If you are sure the child is yours, you have to be responsible for the child's up keep. Also, if you can help the mother, both for old time sake and for your child's sake do something.

Let this be a lesson for everyone sleeping apround, wether male or female, to protect himself/herself from ddiseases and unwanted pregnancy. Let it also be a warning to every fool who may want to tie a guy down wioth pregnancy, that it doesnt always work. Let it happen naturally. Dont push it, dont force it.

Bros think abt it this way

"if this girl is ur sister and some selfish and hartless guy happened to do what you re about doing to this mother of ur baby, what would be your reaction"?

you are here seeking advise abi? let me warn you, for your own good, keep that girl and her baby, yes, u have to make her your wife because there is no other way out.

But if you harden your mind and dump her, i tell you, be ready for the part 2 of ur life.

When u were sleeping with her u didn't see all these errors u are seeing now abi?

Amadioha magbue kwagi ebe ahu!

nwando:


what child did she have?
a boy or girl?
If a girl,would you want a man to do her like you've shamelessly done her mother.
Do you have sisters and how would you want a man like you to wickedly use them?

I dislike you immensely and I don't even know you.
You will surely get your due reward.

omoge25:

First of all you are a useless goat! Her secondary school statue didnt stop you from gbenshing her in the first place abi?

Adebam:

He is indeed a disgrace to humanity.

from my own view, since he said he can't mary the lady, i think he should leave her but to be taking care of the baby.
because this guy can harm or even kill this lady if forced to marry her.
make we remember say this na marriage issue no be mere relationship o!!!!

immunno:

some people can just be inconsiderate and self centered

@Poster
So much for "African" values!  Thank God I am not looking for a husband.  I almost regretted having my daughter reading this, to think she might end up in the hands of such a "cad"! No wonder Nigeria has one of the worst records of "civil rights" abuse cases.

Either you lack proper upbringing or you are just plain evil! May God refuse you peace in your final days on earth!

What vermin!

Don't dare leave the girl. You have to carry the cross with her.
By the way whom do you want to marry the girl when you forced her out of school just because you wanted to satisfy your selfish interest.
Better send her back to school. Afterall your own faults is even worst than hers. rrrrrh

Dear poster,

I appreciate your sincerity! It is very glaring from your post that you have a ‘heart’; I mean you have a conscience……….reason why you don't want to hurt your lady anymore.

Now that she has a baby with you, that should be a gum stick. However, if you truly love her, all you need to do is to Behind her up. Time and patience will help you to achieve this. But first of all, you need to talk to her. Let her know why you treat her the way you do. I believe she loves you, if you let her know that you can't compromise those flaws, grammar, reading writing and stuff, I'm pretty sure she will put in her best to change. As for grammar, in order to help her conversational English, you may decide to start communicating with her in English and always correct her, but not in a derogatory manner. She will get things straight. I came to China 4 years ago, before then I had no clue as to what the language was like. Even now, I can neither read nor write their characters but I speak fluently……, in a manner of 4 years.  So you imagine someone born and raised in Nigeria where English is the official language.  I am sure she will blend fast for the sake of love. It’s not going to be easy….but it is possible and patience is the answer.

Tell yourself you can do it and you’ll see that the subject of your post will change to ‘how to I love the mother of my baby’

Please if you need one-to-one counseling on this issue, you may reach me on dorcasde@yahoo.com.

Cheers