Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! - Jokes Etc - Nairaland
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| Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 11:00am On May 10, 2012 |
A Pastor rears chicken in the Church premises, so one evening a Cock went missing. In Church the next day the Pastor asked "who has a cock?" All the men stood up.." No, I mean who has seen a cock?" All the women got up, "No, no, I meant who has seen a cock that isn't theirs?" Half of the women got up, "Oh for goodness sake i mean!! Who has seen my cock??" All the Choir girls got up....Lmao.... 1 Like |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 11:01am On May 10, 2012 |
More to ©º♏Є! |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 11:50am On May 10, 2012 |
Wicked husband One evening a husband n wife were in bed.d husband was reading a book and d wife was watching TV, d husband reaches over and puts his hand in his wife's panties then withdraws his hand, d wife was surprised by dis nd thought perhaps her husband was in the mood for a lil love. A short time later d husband again reaches into his wife's panties then withdraws his hand. Nw d wife is almost sure that her husband was in the mood. She decides to wait 4him to touch her a third time and then she will know for sure.Sure enough,d husband, still repeat d move she leaves the bed, removes her clothes and returns ready for sex.Her husband, still reading his book was surprised wen she says,'dear!, I'm ready! d husband asks,'for what'? she says ''well for sex dear! u've fingered me three times in the last 5mins and now i'm ready! d husband replies 'Huh!! Sex? I was just wetting my finger so I could flip the pages over. 1 Like |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by sylve11: 4:11pm On May 10, 2012 |
davades: Wicked husband One evening a husband n wife were in bed.d husband was reading a book and d wife was watching TV, d husband reaches over and puts his hand in his wife's panties then withdraws his hand, d wife was surprised by dis nd thought perhaps her husband was in the mood for a lil love. A short time later d husband again reaches into his wife's panties then withdraws his hand. Nw d wife is almost sure that her husband was in the mood. She decides to wait 4him to touch her a third time and then she will know for sure.Sure enough,d husband, still repeat d move she leaves the bed, removes her clothes and returns ready for sex.Her husband, still reading his book was surprised wen she says,'dear!, I'm ready! d husband asks,'for what'? she says ''well for sex dear! u've fingered me three times in the last 5mins and now i'm ready! d husband replies 'Huh!! Sex? I was just wetting my finger so I could flip the pages over. lol, have seen this several times but still makes me lol.   |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by DJNANCY: 4:22pm On May 10, 2012 |
I think nairaland should create a new section called "copy 'n' paste section. |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by Nobody: 4:27pm On May 10, 2012 |
wow, very funny... doesnt matter if its copied from any fuckn place.... 1 Like
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| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 4:35pm On May 10, 2012 |
Woman: My husband is not interested in SEX Doc; Give him this pill everyday. Put one each in his TEA daily. She's did that and both enjoyed themselves. The Next day she put 2 pills in his tea and they enjoyed much more. The 3rd day, she emptied all the bottle of pills into the TEA. Two days later the Doc called to know the progress but the woman son that replies. Mum is in Coma, Aunty is in the hospital Maid is suing for rape, My ass is paining me and Dad is looking for Bingo everywhere. We need HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL 3 Likes |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 4:36pm On May 10, 2012 |
ondo_boi: wow, very funny... doesnt matter if its copied from any fuckn place.... I dey feel you bro...xpect more soon! |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 12:26pm On May 11, 2012 |
Ben went 2 David's house 2 play Card with some Friends.Ben sat directly across David's wife.A card dropped on d Floor&Ben bent 2 pick it up.He looked across d table&saw David's wife's Leg Opened with no Panties.He stood up&went into d Kitchen 2get Water.2his suprise David's wife followed him&said,"did U LIKE Wht U SAW?" Ben said,"YES I DO"she smiled&said"Well u can get pass dat level but with only 10,000bucks".So Ben thought abt it 4a while & said "OK! No Shaking" She Said "Come here 2moro by 2:30pm; dat time David wud av been to work" Ben replied"OKAY,I'll come "Next day Ben came Over &they had SEX,He paid her&Left. Later,David came home &asked his wife"did Ben came here 2day?"She said YES,thinking she had been caught"David said"Gud!Cuz dt Fool came 2ma Office dis morning 2borrow 10,000bucks &said he'll give U d Money b4 I'm bck.did he give U? :/=D.... |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by Nobody: 1:52pm On May 11, 2012 |
LOL! so he lost 20,000bucks |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by Nobody: 8:25pm On May 11, 2012 |
I've seen all d jokes before except d third one. Dunno whether to laff. Some were still funny sha..... |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by toygod2: 12:21am On May 12, 2012 |
O'boi....dos jokes were OK but noticed something, why was it all about  ??u knw naimma report u to ur mamma 1 Like |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 2:33pm On May 12, 2012 |
toygod2: O'boi....dos jokes were OK but noticed something, Remember ma mum is yo mama! |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 2:38pm On May 12, 2012 |
A boy asked his teacher if honey has legs, d teacher said no, but why did u asked? D boy said because I always hear my dad whispers "HONEY OPEN UR LEGS WIDE". |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by Homar(m): 11:28am On May 13, 2012 |
Enough is enough stop this copy and paste bullshiiit . Or face my wrath . |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 4:21pm On May 21, 2012 |
Homar: Enough is enough stop this copy and paste bullshiiit . Or face my wrath . Ur Rat? O de ni e |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 4:42pm On May 21, 2012 |
Homar: Enough is enough stop this copy and paste bullshiiit . Or face my wrath . |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 1:08pm On May 23, 2012 |
Son: mum why did aunty Ego name her daughter Gold? Mum: sometimes mothers name their kids after what they like best Son: so what's behind my own name? Mum: don't disturb me Dickson, am busy in the kitchen. 1 Like |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 4:57pm On Jun 01, 2012 |
A beautiful,sexy,good looking lady was sitting next to a guy in a plane...the lady said to him “can u help me remove something from my breast! the exciting young man replied... “Wow! It will be my pleasure...so what is it? “Your eyes” idiot”! 1 Like |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 3:56pm On Jun 13, 2012 |
When he was singing tears began to roll down her eyes; so Akpos replied: eyaah! I nor know say you love me reach dis level oh! Wow! My bodi dey sweet me. The girl replied "nor be the song dey make me cry oh! Na the odour from your mouth dey pepper my eye". LoooooL |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by onlyme247: 4:32pm On Jun 13, 2012 |
davades: When he was singing tears began to roll down her eyes; so Akpos replied: eyaah! I nor know say you love me reach dis level oh! Wow! My bodi dey sweet me. u try |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 8:51pm On Jun 14, 2012 |
†ђ♌n̶̲̥̅̊k§ man...more coming |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 11:12pm On Jun 27, 2012 |
CIVILIZATION A girl died of AIDS, so her grandmother came from the village to pack her belongings. While doing the packing she saw the girl's g-string. With tears in her eyes she said, "THIS DISEASE IS DANGEROUS, SEE HOW IT HAS EATEN MY CHILD'S PANT"... =))º°˚˚˚°ºнaĦaнaº°˚˚˚°º=)) NB: PLAY SAFE! |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by Nobody: 8:55am On Jun 28, 2012 |
Your head dey dere davades. |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by bashydemy(m): 9:29am On Jun 28, 2012 |
Nice one OP |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by bright007(f): 9:48am On Jun 28, 2012 |
Good yokes but There is nothing exclusive about this thread.All jokes were. Copy $ paste. |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 12:56pm On Jun 29, 2012 |
booqee: Your head dey dere davades. Babe boo boo I see u |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 5:51am On Jul 14, 2012 |
WEEKEND LAFTA::::::::::::An old woman boarded a bus to lagos from calabar.She told the driver; "Driver, if u reach Benin,pls stop me o!"The driver nodded and then she shouted again "My children, una don hear wetin I tell am? Everybody responded YES MA!!! On the long journey to lagos, everybody slept off but this woman never blinked. After several hours of driving,very close to lagos,about 3hrs away from Benin,The poor woman asked; "Driver you never reach benin ni?"," Ooooh!! The driver exclaimed; madam benin is like 3hours behind us.The woman started crying"take me back to Benin abeg I no wan wahala o!!!" Considering the age of the woman it was agreed, that the driver should turn back back to Benin. On getting to benin, the driver came down,opened the door and told the woman she is in Benin. The woman simply opened her hand bag, brought out a sachet of panadol, removed two tablets and swallowed with the bottle water she had. She then smiled and said; Na my daughter say if I reach Benin, make I take 2 tablets of panadol, Oya! Make we go lagos. =)) If u be driver,wetin u go do for dis old woman !1 Like |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 5:52am On Jul 14, 2012 |
SEE ME, SEE WAHALA OOOO.. Pls who owns a MAN, the mother or the wife? Mother-in-law: "My son must listen to me and obey my instructions, except if he did not suck this breast of mine for more than a year........" Daughter-in-law: "Mama, that was over 40 years ago!!! You must realize that it is my breast he sucks now. He has sucked it for more than 10 years and he is still sucking". Wahala dey oh!!! Men are in dilemma! Mother-in-Law: “ I carried him for 9 months........ " Daughter-In-Law: "He was only 3.5KG, then, wasn't he?....so what's the big deal? I CARRY HIM ALMOST EVERY NIGHT NOW AND HE IS 90 KG. He even told me U used to beat him B4 - nd he beats ME now"  I beg, Who win dis debate .... |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by JojoArmani(m): 7:53am On Jul 14, 2012 |
Thumb Up man ur jokes make sense though I ve seen some b4 but it still makes me laugh. |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 10:29am On Jul 19, 2012 |
Jojo Armani: Thumb Up man ur jokes make sense though I ve seen some b4 but it still makes me laugh. †ђ♌n̶̲̥̅̊k§ man...happy viewing!!! |
| Re: Ma Jokes Gallery (exclusive) Enjoy!!! by davades(m): 10:31am On Jul 19, 2012 |
A HR Manager, his Assistant, an old woman and her young daughter are traveling in a train and during the course of time get themselves introduced to each other and become temporary friends. The train goes through a tunnel and it gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. The women and the Assistant are sitting there looking perplexed. The Manager is bending over holding his face, which is red from an apparent slap. All of them remain diplomatic and nobody says anything. The Old woman is thinking: "These Managers are all crazy after girls. He must have kissed my daughter in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him." The Young girl is thinking: "The Manager must have tried to kiss me but kissed my mother instead and got slapped." The Manager is thinking: "Damn it. My Assistant must have kissed the young girl. She might have thought it was me and slapped me." Now guess what the Assistant is thinking. Now hold your breath and read what the Assistant is thinking........... "If this train goes through another tunnel I will make another kissing sound and slap my Manager again. The Rascal keeps harassing me in the Office."  =D =))5 Likes |
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