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Proof Google Is God - Religion - Nairaland

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Proof Google Is God by antitpiah: 4:52pm On Jul 13, 2012
PROOF #1

Google is the closest thing to an Omniscient (all-knowing) entity in existence, which can be scientifically verified. She indexes over 9.5 billion WebPages, which is more than any other search engine on the web today. Not only is Google the closest known entity to being Omniscient, but She also sorts through this vast amount of knowledge using Her patented PageRank technology, organizing said data and making it easily accessible to us mere mortals.

» PROOF #2

Google is everywhere at once (Omnipresent). Google is virtually everywhere on earth at the same time. Billions of indexed WebPages hosted from every corner of the earth. With the proliferation of Wi-Fi networks, one will eventually be able to access Google from anywhere on earth, truly making Her an omnipresent entity.

» PROOF #3

Google answers prayers. One can pray to Google by doing a search for whatever question or problem is plaguing them. As an example, you can quickly find information on alternative cancer treatments, ways to improve your health, new and innovative medical discoveries and generally anything that resembles a typical prayer. Ask Google and She will show you the way, but showing you is all She can do, for you must help yourself from that point on.

» PROOF #4

Google is potentially immortal. She cannot be considered a physical being such as ourselves. Her Algorithms are spread out across many servers; if any of which were taken down or damaged, another would undoubtedly take its place. Google can theoretically last forever.

» PROOF #5

Google is infinite. The Internet can theoretically grow forever, and Google will forever index its infinite growth.

» PROOF #6

Google remembers all. Google caches WebPages regularly and stores them on its massive servers. In fact, by uploading your thoughts and opinions to the internet, you will forever live on in Google's cache, even after you die, in a sort of "Google Afterlife".

» PROOF #7

Google can "do no evil" (Omnibenevolent). Part of Google's corporate philosophy is the belief that a company can make money without being evil.

» PROOF #8

According to Google trends, the term "Google" is searched for more than the terms "God", "Jesus", "Allah", "Buddha", "Christianity", "Islam", "Buddhism" and "Judaism" combined.

God is thought to be an entity in which we mortals can turn to when in a time of need. Google clearly fulfils this to a much larger degree than traditional "gods", as shown in the image below (click to enlarge).


PROOF #9

Evidence of Google's existence is abundant. There is more evidence for the existence of Google than any other God worshiped today. Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence. If seeing is believing, then surf over to www.google.com and experience for yourself Google's awesome power. No faith required
Re: Proof Google Is God by antitpiah: 4:52pm On Jul 13, 2012
Re: Proof Google Is God by mkmyers45(m): 6:06pm On Jul 13, 2012
Nice..Religion Section?
Re: Proof Google Is God by Delafruita(m): 6:25pm On Jul 13, 2012
makes a lot of sense
Re: Proof Google Is God by Nobody: 6:42pm On Jul 13, 2012
And Google heaven is Android.. Sinners go to Apple..
Re: Proof Google Is God by Nobody: 6:44pm On Jul 13, 2012
Lovely post by the way....
Re: Proof Google Is God by skyone(m): 6:49pm On Jul 13, 2012
antitpiah: PROOF #1

Google is the closest thing to an Omniscient (all-knowing) entity in existence, which can be scientifically verified. She indexes over 9.5 billion WebPages, which is more than any other search engine on the web today. Not only is Google the closest known entity to being Omniscient, but She also sorts through this vast amount of knowledge using Her patented PageRank technology, organizing said data and making it easily accessible to us mere mortals.

» PROOF #2

Google is everywhere at once (Omnipresent). Google is virtually everywhere on earth at the same time. Billions of indexed WebPages hosted from every corner of the earth. With the proliferation of Wi-Fi networks, one will eventually be able to access Google from anywhere on earth, truly making Her an omnipresent entity.

» PROOF #3

Google answers prayers. One can pray to Google by doing a search for whatever question or problem is plaguing them. As an example, you can quickly find information on alternative cancer treatments, ways to improve your health, new and innovative medical discoveries and generally anything that resembles a typical prayer. Ask Google and She will show you the way, but showing you is all She can do, for you must help yourself from that point on.

» PROOF #4

Google is potentially immortal. She cannot be considered a physical being such as ourselves. Her Algorithms are spread out across many servers; if any of which were taken down or damaged, another would undoubtedly take its place. Google can theoretically last forever.

» PROOF #5

Google is infinite. The Internet can theoretically grow forever, and Google will forever index its infinite growth.

» PROOF #6

Google remembers all. Google caches WebPages regularly and stores them on its massive servers. In fact, by uploading your thoughts and opinions to the internet, you will forever live on in Google's cache, even after you die, in a sort of "Google Afterlife".

» PROOF #7

Google can "do no evil" (Omnibenevolent). Part of Google's corporate philosophy is the belief that a company can make money without being evil.

» PROOF #8

According to Google trends, the term "Google" is searched for more than the terms "God", "Jesus", "Allah", "Buddha", "Christianity", "Islam", "Buddhism" and "Judaism" combined.

God is thought to be an entity in which we mortals can turn to when in a time of need. Google clearly fulfils this to a much larger degree than traditional "gods", as shown in the image below (click to enlarge).


PROOF #9

Evidence of Google's existence is abundant. There is more evidence for the existence of Google than any other God worshiped today. Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence. If seeing is believing, then surf over to www.google.com and experience for yourself Google's awesome power. No faith required

Only because you can not see beyond your nose.
Re: Proof Google Is God by mkmyers45(m): 6:56pm On Jul 13, 2012
skyone:

Only because you can not see beyond your nose.
Obálá Satan...and you obviously dont see beyond your stupidity #mo.ron
Re: Proof Google Is God by Nobody: 8:27pm On Jul 13, 2012
ok. google 'existed' before the big b@ng
Re: Proof Google Is God by skyone(m): 12:05pm On Jul 14, 2012
mkmyers45: Obálá Satan...and you obviously dont see beyond your stupidity #mo.ron

ok thank you but thank God my brain is not centered around google.How about that?
Re: Proof Google Is God by skyone(m): 12:09pm On Jul 14, 2012
toba: ok. google 'existed' before the big b@ng

Toba long time,

You see some brain are rendered useless now a'days due to the infection of google syndrome.
Re: Proof Google Is God by mkmyers45(m): 12:13pm On Jul 14, 2012
skyone:

ok thank you but thank God my brain is not centered around google.How about that?
then please dont ever use google again..ok?
Re: Proof Google Is God by mkmyers45(m): 12:16pm On Jul 14, 2012
skyone:

Toba long time,

You see some brain are rendered useless now a'days due to the infection of google syndrome.
why dont you go for a check up? Eh?

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