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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? (18168 Views)
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How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Darlingme(f): 10:05am On Oct 05, 2021 |
Why is it so difficult for most people to keep to their promises, to remit debts? You help someone with loan based on aggreement and trust, but when it's time to remit, they come up with excuses, default, making you look like you're too weak, too simple and when you get upset and raise your voice, they tag you as being Money conscious. On your own part, you don't want to lose relationship/friendship/family with them. you consider their struggles, yet, when they have your money either From their salaries or other means, they wouldn't still pay back. Have you ever been in this kind of situation? How were you able to handle this kind of people without becoming enemies? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BmNFHNyHUEU 11 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Shifi1: 10:09am On Oct 05, 2021 |
They are not your friends Collect your by all means.. Through police or go there an disgrace them 60 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by TearNinja001: 10:16am On Oct 05, 2021 |
Maybe you give them a grace period,that's if their reason for defaulting is genuine, after that collect your money whatever means( legal) possible. You can involve the police as well. There's no way you wouldn't turn enemies though, they'll always see you as the bad person for not considering them. The only way you wouldn't turn enemies is if you forget about the debt, and that's not an option.lai lai 26 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Nobody: 10:17am On Oct 05, 2021 |
There's no rule as to how to recover your money from debtors, any which way you may choose is allowed and if they decide to be an enemy afterwards you move and never look back 41 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Nobody: 10:19am On Oct 05, 2021 |
when things like dis happens, i becomes closer to them. they end up lending me a higher amount of what they owe me. na dat time i go decide how i go take punish dem 11 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by chatinent: 10:24am On Oct 05, 2021 |
Give only loans you can give to charity...make e no shock you. 59 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by pocohantas(f): 10:26am On Oct 05, 2021 |
I hate debt recovery, so I will rather play safe from the onset than find myself in that position. Some basic rules of lending that works for me. 1) DON’T LEND PEOPLE WHAT YOU CAN’T AFFORD TO LOSE. This defeats the concept of a loan because I didn’t lend you the money so I can lose it, the onus is on you to repay your debt. But then, it is still very sensible because even banks have obligor limits. It would help cushion your heartbreak. 130 Likes 11 Shares |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by 1F30M4(f): 11:20am On Oct 05, 2021 |
Never give what you can't afford to lose, learnt the hard way.. Humans are incredible beings. 9 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Klass99(f): 11:32am On Oct 05, 2021 |
26 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Kondomatic(m): 11:48am On Oct 05, 2021 |
Darlingme:I have never given anyone loan and they paid complete, that's for those that paid at all. There was a close friend that I explained everything to because I was beginning to think it was a curse. She felt bad for me but she called me one day that she needed urgent 20k, her reason was genuine and she has a good source of income so I was convinced that paying back won't be a problem but I still reminded her that people don't pay me. She was like haba, how can you say this, you will get your money on (she gave date). I sent the money. Four months later, money I no see. I wasn't ready to lose her friendship so I let the money go. But I learned my lesson. If you need 10k and I have 1k, I go dash you. Go find the rest elsewhere. To get your money back, you have to be rude and brutal but that's not me so I no give again. I kuku no get again Unloading a gun is always better than shooting at someone with bullet proof vest. 31 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by socialmediaman: 11:50am On Oct 05, 2021 |
Some people treat loans as grants, . I don’t lend what I can’t afford to lose, and You only get one chance! If you don’t pay back, that’s it, no more borrowing! I also avoid lending money to someone who lives above their means, those ones hardly pay back, they’re not responsible enough to understand the value of the money to you, because it’s valueless to them Finally, if they owe you millions and they’re still your siblings and friends, you have Nigerian blood running in you, we’re all in this sh** together 9 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Obaxxx(m): 11:57am On Oct 05, 2021 |
The truth is that some people are very good at Owing debts and the same time showing the i-don't-care attitude . So now tell me,how we go do that kind person without exchanging punches? . 8 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Darlingme(f): 12:22pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Kondomatic:The exact sinero here. I learnt a lot 3 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Darlingme(f): 12:25pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Obaxxx:Very true. And after the punches, you turned enemies. Very sad 2 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Zico777(m): 12:45pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Infact it's a serious issue! I borrowed someone 100k on the 5th of Dec 2020,with the promise of paying back ending of January 2021. 8 months down the line it's one story or another. 12 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by cayorday89(m): 12:52pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
She might take me as an arch-enemy but I don't care, she is an ex who I lent 30k she said she needed urgently to sort out her school fees, and promised to pay the next week, she never did and gave excuses about her been owed salary, we were still dating or so I thought, lockdown came and whatever excuse she gave was genuine but I hate been fooled, found out through Facebook she was dating someone else, she was tagged and she commented my husband, I was not surprised or shocked such is life, as I already thought of the possibility as things were not the way it used to be, I only messaged her that she could have done better by letting me know as it is not a do or die affair and she should not forget my 30k,but she claimed if I loved her I wasn't suppose to ask for my money, that angered me the more, whereas I sent her money twice during the lockdown despite my doubt about her genuineness, she later said she was going to pay that I should give her time as she was waiting for her consignment and needed money to clear them at the Port, I knew this was a lie, I left her for two months messaged her again another round of lies and I have been blocked by her on all platforms so I changed my WhatsApp number to get in touch with her, after four months I contacted I fiance, and message them simultaneously but I told him I was a friend and explained myself, he asked me to send my account number but she also requested for it and I told him she has promised to pay, the said day elapsed and she came with another round of lies. A friend later told me she is having her wedding, two days after the wedding, I messaged her, another round of lies, also insulted me, but I was willing to let her have her way and do whatever pleases her as I have one last card to play, her sim she uses is registered with my details and after one year of giving her enough time to do what is right, I did the necessary by forcefully getting my money with that means, and she still dey owe 3k but I don overlook am.... 10 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Zico777(m): 1:02pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Pls anyone here who can help track location via phone number? I need to get my money. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Zico777(m): 1:06pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
cayorday89:Baba, but she give u soup lick na! 1 Like |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by cayorday89(m): 1:08pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Darlingme:Simply because friends like that aren't worth keeping.... My motto now is, if I can starve myself of so many things just to have savings to cater for unforeseen circumstances anyone can do it also, forgo that you want to borrow money for cos you will end up forgoing paying back the money as it's something you can't afford in the first place. 7 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by cayorday89(m): 1:13pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Zico777:Quite funny, soup is a mutual thing but I never had sex with her, cos I don't just do down like that, wanted to know what I am involved in and she failed woefully... She took my gentility for a fool I guessed. You can go through my comments to see how I also shocked my boss, I no dey play with money oo, especially if you think say I be fool... 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Zico777(m): 1:18pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
cayorday89:It's always like that once one is considerate. They term it as being foolish. 7 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Klass99(f): 1:22pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by SeaTrade(m): 1:34pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Well,I have just one debt that is trying to look like a bad one at this point, Huge,but it was business we did,something we've been doing for more than 5 years now,since I moved to other things ,the guy is coming up with all sorts of stories and funny thing is we aren't even in the same country.But I know anyday I see it important to collect that debt,I will recover it so I'm not worried. In my line of work,you can't cope without giving credit, but i give out smart and secure credit by collecting post dated cheques. When it is due,I just deposit it without consulting you, If the account isn't funded,your loss cos bank go deduct charges cos of the bounce when e bounce,and I will still deposit again after collecting the cheque almost immediately. So that when you lose like 15k on return charges that week,no be person go tell you to fund the account. Real business people don't like losses at all so they'll rather pay you your money than to be losing money on a steady to Bank return charges. And also note this,avoid giving credit to people who feel too big or care about their appearance and how society perceives their status than running a business/organisation,they will more often than not "chop your money" and most times dem no hold shishi.I've experienced this many times in my line of duty/life and also all the so called contractors(runaway from these ones). 16 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Darlingme(f): 1:53pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
SeaTrade:The worst part is, they keep funding their businesses, appearing flashy on Facebook, but to pay back is always a problem. Anyway. I keep learning. 6 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by SeaTrade(m): 1:58pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Darlingme:They are not funding anything ,that is what they want you to believe.A person who understands business will never want to owe a creditor for long so as not to destroy his line of credit. All they do is to appear flashy to make you think they are doing well so that you will fall for their borrow scam. A person doing great in business most times don't even have the time to be flashy or let alone the peace to do so because business carry plenty stress, All those charlatans making noise online are most times wannabes. 20 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Darlingme(f): 1:59pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Klass99:People like that always pay back installmentally. A very terrible way of paying back. |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by cayorday89(m): 1:59pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Klass99:LOL at the 3k deficit, that part is a long story, I don't know where she lives again so that gave her leverage that I could not get to her,but the thing that still linked us was her sim which was mine and registered in my name which I gave to her to use when she misplaced hers and still blocked me on it. I actually retrieved the sim and used it to load card with the amount in it... Lest I forgot, she claimed she was using the guy when I only asked her for the money not even relationship, that I should not worry, that the guy gave her 500k and also helped her with importation business of another 500k investment, inside lockdown that import and export was not allowed, and she will come back to me, and I told her the only thing she owed me is the 30k I lent her and nothing else not even the 2500 and 3500 and the Nokia phone I sent to her during lockdown when she said she was out of cash and had a bad phone, that was of my own willingness.. 3 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Klass99(f): 2:06pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
2 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by cayorday89(m): 2:08pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Darlingme:She was not willing to pay back, look up to how I got it forcefully.. I was not just ready to let go of that money cos I hate been taken for a fool and been insulted on top my act of benevolence, also toying with my intelligence. Below is one of the excerpts of our chats 2/13/21, 11:10 AM - Coolkay: Its good I am seeing this part of yours and I must let you know I am not ready to leave that money,so you can call me childish or whatever you like,I don't care ,cos na borrow I borrow you and not a gift,the others you scammed me of due to your deceit I forego but this I won't take, as you think you can take me for a fool.. 2/13/21, 11:19 AM - Ri: Hmmmmm 2/13/21, 11:19 AM - Ri: Thanks 2/13/21, 11:19 AM - Ri: God bless you 2/13/21, 12:36 PM - Coolkay: You still decide not to say anything 2/13/21, 12:36 PM - Coolkay: All is well 2/13/21, 1:09 PM - Coolkay: Going mute is not the best option, why not say if you are not going to pay me again, or when you will pay it and not fail instead of all my this you are doing,every one sees their actions or deeds as the best and just as you saw nothing wrong in all this except mine ,one thing I am sure of is I was open with you from day one and I gave you benefit of the doubt and also told you if you were not interested again let me know so we can move on with our separate life but you chose to do the contrary and blocked my numbers for reasons best known to you and were telling me then that did I still want to collect the money, if I claim to love you I wouldn't bother to ask for it. This is the last time I will ask you for it from here. Cos I can't be changing numbers cos of you.. 2/13/21, 2:12 PM -Ri: That was wen I knew there was so love to offer to me 2/13/21, 2:13 PM - Ri: U Neva tell a woman you truly love that kind of statement 2/13/21, 2:13 PM -Ri: Love is not based on benefit but sacrifice 2/13/21, 5:06 PM - Coolkay: Reason why I said you only justify your own actions and condemn mine. Love that you lose interest in since 2019 or what, na man go dey do the love up and down while you as woman test him on money he does not have.. All these are excuses to make you the saint, that was when you knew but you kept asking for money and I gave you what I could afford. 2/13/21, 5:08 PM - Coolkay: What statement and what were you actions that brought about the statement 2/13/21, 5:10 PM - Coolkay: #your actions 2/13/21, 5:12 PM - Coolkay: But I was not seeking for benefits, and I gave the Lil sacrifice as time permits 2/13/21, 5:13 PM - Coolkay: So in all you are deliberately not going to give me back my money.. No P ,all is well..... 4 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by cayorday89(m): 2:09pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Klass99:Yes 3 Likes |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by Klass99(f): 2:21pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Re: How Did You Handle Debtors Without Turning To Enemies? by cayorday89(m): 2:36pm On Oct 05, 2021 |
Klass99:She is in her early twenties, she did oo, and she and her husband threatened to arrest me until I told the husband everything when he called me. I guess he later see reason with me and she sent insultive messages with her other number I never knew of, called the number back but my numbers were still blocked on her phone... SMS, she sent after everything... Kayode u don't have shame What is paining you, that I cannot follow a low class foolish man, am glad you have taken your money, God knows I was in a pressing need wen I borrowed from you, but all my life I have sacrificed for others , you are very selfish that you cannot help others how can you receive help, please leave I and my family alone I won't warn you again When I finish with you, you will regret ever knowing, when I borrowed from you,did I steal from your account? I have placed my charges yesterday, if u don't sleep in prison kayode then it's not me, I warned you but you feel you are smart, I don't talk much You are not aware of the crimial offense u have landed I have all voice recordings from my husband, u think u can just do such thing to my husband and go, I warned you before Just get your lawyer prepared 7 Likes |
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