Everybody talks about kid being a gift, the only gift where you puke for nine months before you receive it and then scream your lungs out the day it arrives.

Most women say it is the greatest experience of their lives but the truth is most women are liars.
It’s a lie every generation tells the next one so they can get grandchildren.

For about 40 weeks, you’d be troubled by a number of things ranging from swollen br€asts, stuck-out n!pples, mood swings, nausea, tiredness, heartburn, constipation and weight-gain.
There will also be that mask of pregnancy that is a product of patches of darker skin over your cheeks, forehead, nose and on upper lips matching both sides of your face.

It will be awful, painful and unspeakable. It would be frightening and horrendous but you’ll get through it somehow…

Your husband/boyfriend will tell you he’ll be really hands-on when the baby arrives but truth is that’s not going happen. They are hollow-offers he’ll never back up.
He’ll be there at first, probably change a diaper or two until the novelty wears off.
Those 3.00 am feedings he said he’d help with? Forget it! he doesn’t have b0obs!
He doesn’t have any natural nurturing instincts and will never have them except he decides to squeeze an eight pounds baby out of his pen!s.
A baby can scream into a bull-horn and your husband won’t budge.
It all boils down to men thinking differently as soon as the baby arrives.
Motherhood also changes your life in lots of ways.
Your stomach starts looking like Spanish stucco, your br€asts resembling two balloons you find behind the couch a week after the party, your hips and ass a wall of stretch- marked paintings and you’ll never be able to wear a bikini again.
Your baby will frustrate you with uncontrollable screaming fits, depression will set in and you’ll hate your life.
When your child is older, he or she will hit you and steal from your purse, and cry and scream while you scream and shout.

You will make the beds and clean up the house and your children will create for you a futility of your efforts.

For the rest of your life, there will be so many moments you’ll feel lonely but will never be alone.

Slimyem, are you telling us someone sniped you, and put an embryo in there.

And that's why you have stopped being an active poster on NL?

I can only imagine how swollen ya already huge tiddays would look like now.

Op is pregnant

What a rant


Thank to the powers that single hood is being de stigmatized in naija like the West

So you will not be saddled with such inconveniences like child bearing

Praise Jah for civilisation

Odilafta:
Op is pregnant

i thought i was the only one thinking same

Na so we see am ooo

SirShymex:
Slimyem, are you telling us someone sniped you, and put an embryo in there.

And that's why you have stopped being an active poster on NL?

I can only imagine how swollen ya already huge tiddays would look like now.

Do you really want answers to all that or would you prefer a picture proof?

When you know the stress and humiliation barren women passes through you will call all those things you called bad as blessings.

Most women say it is the greatest experience of
their lives but the truth is most women are liars.
It’s a lie every generation tells the next one so
they can get grandchildren.

only those who do not have kids would make such statement.

slimyem:

Do you really want answers to all that or would you prefer a picture proof?

I want both, especially the picture showing how swollen dem twins are.

And hopefully, the dad isn't a camel jockeying ragheaded Arab because it seems you love sand-nyggahs.

hahahaha
lady slimyem has been bitten by the one-eyed trouser-snake.

symptoms of a trousersnake bite

•nausea
•swollen belly
•severe swelling of the body parts
•fatigue
•increased urination
•cravings/aversion of certain foods

berem:
only those who do not have kids would make such statement.

Chill! It's tongue-in cheek

coogar:
hahahaha
lady slimyem has been bitten by the one-eyed trouser-snake.

thankfully, you are only guessing what the deal is

slimyem:

thankfully, you are only guessing what the deal is

i know what the deal is....
please tell me it's obowunmi's baby you are carrying. if not, that young man might commit suicide.

SirShymex:


I want both, especially the picture showing how swollen dem twins are.

And hopefully, the dad isn't a camel jockeying ragheaded Arab because it seems you love sand-nyggahs.

...you must be mistaking me for someone else..

slimyem:


...you must be mistaking me for someone else..

Lmao...I remember slimyem from Ondo, the Egyptian Arab lover - from those days when the romance section used to be the ish, before that albino muthaphucka messed the section up.

I know ya baby dad now...and I think you created a thread about him last yr.

Where ya pic at?

Somebody is high on hormones

slimyem, no vex-just wait till you hold your lil angel, ya life will never remain the same again

alutacontinua:
Somebody is high on hormones

slimyem, no vex-just wait till you hold your lil angel, ya life will never remain the same again

This is not about me aluta. Don't join them...

How do you know?
Men can't have babies

alutacontinua:
Somebody is high on hormones

slimyem, no vex-just wait till you hold your lil angel, ya life will never remain the same again

cococandy:
How do you know?
Men can't have babies

I do a lot of research

coogar:


i know what the deal is....
please tell me it's obowunmi's baby you are carrying. if not, that young man might commit suicide.

Somebody don give my babe belle?

coogar:


i know what the deal is....
please tell me it's obowunmi's baby you are carrying. if not, that young man might commit suicide.

I love babies

Coogar you need deliverance from cho cho cho aka over talking

I call dibs on Goodmother things.

Chai! Congrats o lepayemi

slimyem:

Do you really want answers to all that or would you prefer a picture proof?

Picture proof. Vivid pictures. A picture is worth a thousand words after all.

Op, I do get where you are coming from.