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Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church - Religion (3) - Nairaland

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Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by DutchesSsS(f): 6:51pm On Dec 14, 2014
If I hear...
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by nikkflexible(f): 6:56pm On Dec 14, 2014
which category am I sef? #thinking# ....ok..always on time and leaves immediately after sharing the grace...no tym to dey greet pple grin
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by WildChild00(m): 7:02pm On Dec 14, 2014
jvera:
no 1 reminded of gal...ws invited to a church nd a gal actually wore a high waist jegens wit crop top nd heels while d pastor ws preachin she stood up goin to d offering box to sow seed catwalkin.... everyone atention focused on ha forgetin d pastor ws preachin.

onyi-cha how far?
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by tonychristopher: 7:09pm On Dec 14, 2014
Tinubu:
1- The perpetual late comer: This one has an obsession with being noticed. She always 'majestically' dogwalks( not catwalk) into the church right in the middle of the service, swinging her small but 'standard' bumbum, head held high, and proceeds straight to the front row. Her 'long walk to freedom' most times succeeds in destabilizing the pious and godly 'Brothers in the Lord', who now have a hard time concentrating on 'Manna from above'. She is usually young, pretty, and very much a busybody. *marieolae*

2- The Extremely Gorgeous Chorister: This one is dropdead pretty, has an angelic voice, and is the church's golden girl. At times, she also leads praise and worship sessions. Her 'ministration' is most likely to lead a man to hell than heaven. Watching her 'dance to the Lord' is like watching soft porn.. It can cause a guy an embarrassing erection right there in the House of The Lord. She doesn't dress or act slutty, but her dressing and carriage is just modest enough to conceal the essentials, and revealing enough to make an aroused dude drop his whole month's salary into the offering Box. Too many brethren are seeking her hand in marriage, and she has her choice of pick among the church's most eligible bachelors. So she is a bit proud, condescending, and mostly unavailable if a guy tries to 'corner' her after church service. *Jennimma*

3- The loud ones: These girls usually come to church just to hoot, shout 'ride on pastor!', speak in tongues, and roll on the floor, during the pastor's Ministration. In my view, these are the Pastor's sycophants. They really make the Pastor look anointed, with all their psychedelic activity. They are the the ones who rush out when the pastor says that all virgins should come to the alter. They are also the ones who always fall around, breaking chairs, and alarming everyone , all in the name of being 'under the yoke of the anointing'. Stay away from these kind of girls, before them comot your eye, or cause u grave physical injury, while under their 'annointing'. *onila*

4- The 'Mummy's Girl': This one is always accompanied to church by her stern-faced mum. She is usually not older than 16, but looking very delectable and fresh. (You know that 'innocent freshness' girls usually have at one point in their teenage years, before 'everything' starts going south). A dude dare not come within talking distance of this chick. Her mum is far more interested in protecting her daughter's presumed innocence, than whatever it is the pastor is carrying on about. These are the kind of girls a guy can do nothing about, but admire from a safe distance, unless you wish to extend your investigation beyond God's House. *mzpreshie*


5- The young, beautiful and newly married girl: This one always has a permanent smile plastered on her face. Why she no go smile? She has broken the yoke of spinsterhood in grand style, and most unmarried sisters are envious of her 'progress'. Most of the time, she is married to a much older rich dude who is a member of the Pastor's inner caucus (the Church Cabal). She usually wears expensive wrappers, distracting headties (gele), and hardly stays at one place all through, and even after the service. No be her fault sha... Why she no go show herself? Husband don really scarce for town. *Kachisbarbie*




NOTE: This work is mine... Not copied and pasted from anywhere ..... So please don't ask me about the source... I AM THE SOURCE

You lack the capacity to read women aptly

Now tell me your source
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by tonychristopher: 7:10pm On Dec 14, 2014
nikkflexible:
which category am I sef? #thinking# ....ok..always on time and leaves immediately after sharing the grace...no tym to dey greet pple grin

Then how do u intend getting that man to alter ...pls tell us
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by piagetskinner(m): 7:10pm On Dec 14, 2014
That is y I like deeper life, u don see this kind of poo there
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by thiefnubu(m): 7:22pm On Dec 14, 2014
tonychristopher:


You lack the capacity to read women aptly

Now tell me your source
Please

If you know that I am not the original author of this article, please paste the link to the original article here.


If u won't, stop hating, enjoy the piece, and go in peace...
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by nikkflexible(f): 7:24pm On Dec 14, 2014
tonychristopher:


Then how do u intend getting that man to alter ...pls tell us
..outside church now...it isnt compulsory i marry a 'bro' from my church...most of dem are observers like d OP...not spiritual rara grin tongue
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by Frankenstein: 7:28pm On Dec 14, 2014
Jennimma:
Okay,i'm number 4...but my mum isnt "stern faced" na lipsrsealed
You're not older than 16? Another Iheoma in the making... undecided
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by jidxin(m): 7:29pm On Dec 14, 2014
marieolae:
no 1 is definitely not me. I'm always on time embarassed..

Infact, I laugh at the ladies that do this
It drives me nuts.
. Mary isreal Wassup
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by agarawu23(m): 7:34pm On Dec 14, 2014
marieolae:
no 1 is definitely not me. I'm always on time embarassed..

Infact, I laugh at the ladies that do this
It drives me nuts.
you look like ex abi na my eyes dey see double ni?

topic : op I am sure u r nt concentrating on ur pastor.
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by Nobody: 7:34pm On Dec 14, 2014
This unconciousness-conciousness is becoming-unbecoming among the Ladies and i say Capitalrejectamental for that. And u Oga OP one time u go dey talk say God no dey answer ur prayer wen all u do is watch nd observe; swaying ur neck with constant velocity in varying magnitude till they share the Grace. Next topic *Five type of voice you will meet in Church"
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by Mclick(m): 7:38pm On Dec 14, 2014
Tinubu:
1- The perpetual late comer: This one has an obsession with being noticed. She always 'majestically' dogwalks( not catwalk) into the church right in the middle of the service, swinging her small but 'standard' bumbum, head held high, and proceeds straight to the front row. Her 'long walk to freedom' most times succeeds in destabilizing the pious and godly 'Brothers in the Lord', who now have a hard time concentrating on 'Manna from above'. She is usually young, pretty, and very much a busybody. *marieolae*

2- The Extremely Gorgeous Chorister: This one is dropdead pretty, has an angelic voice, and is the church's golden girl. At times, she also leads praise and worship sessions. Her 'ministration' is most likely to lead a man to hell than heaven. Watching her 'dance to the Lord' is like watching soft porn.. It can cause a guy an embarrassing erection right there in the House of The Lord. She doesn't dress or act slutty, but her dressing and carriage is just modest enough to conceal the essentials, and revealing enough to make an aroused dude drop his whole month's salary into the offering Box. Too many brethren are seeking her hand in marriage, and she has her choice of pick among the church's most eligible bachelors. So she is a bit proud, condescending, and mostly unavailable if a guy tries to 'corner' her after church service. *Jennimma*

3- The loud ones: These girls usually come to church just to hoot, shout 'ride on pastor!', speak in tongues, and roll on the floor, during the pastor's Ministration. In my view, these are the Pastor's sycophants. They really make the Pastor look anointed, with all their psychedelic activity. They are the the ones who rush out when the pastor says that all virgins should come to the alter. They are also the ones who always fall around, breaking chairs, and alarming everyone , all in the name of being 'under the yoke of the anointing'. Stay away from these kind of girls, before them comot your eye, or cause u grave physical injury, while under their 'annointing'. *onila*

4- The 'Mummy's Girl': This one is always accompanied to church by her stern-faced mum. She is usually not older than 16, but looking very delectable and fresh. (You know that 'innocent freshness' girls usually have at one point in their teenage years, before 'everything' starts going south). A dude dare not come within talking distance of this chick. Her mum is far more interested in protecting her daughter's presumed innocence, than whatever it is the pastor is carrying on about. These are the kind of girls a guy can do nothing about, but admire from a safe distance, unless you wish to extend your investigation beyond God's House. *mzpreshie*


5- The young, beautiful and newly married girl: This one always has a permanent smile plastered on her face. Why she no go smile? She has broken the yoke of spinsterhood in grand style, and most unmarried sisters are envious of her 'progress'. Most of the time, she is married to a much older rich dude who is a member of the Pastor's inner caucus (the Church Cabal). She usually wears expensive wrappers, distracting headties (gele), and hardly stays at one place all through, and even after the service. No be her fault sha... Why she no go show herself? Husband don really scarce for town. *Kachisbarbie*




NOTE: This work is mine... Not copied and pasted from anywhere ..... So please don't ask me about the source... I AM THE SOURCE
Chai Op number 5 gets me laughing
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by tonychristopher: 7:38pm On Dec 14, 2014
nikkflexible:
..outside church now...it isnt compulsory i marry a 'bro' from my church...most of dem are observers like d OP...not spiritual rara grin tongue

Don't be yoked with unbelievers yolk
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by Nobody: 7:38pm On Dec 14, 2014
Tinubu:
Please

If you know that I am not the original author of this article, please paste the link to the original article here.


If u won't, stop hating, enjoy the piece, and go in peace...
Oga no mind dem haters *No good can ever comes from them pigs*
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by SHOCK7(m): 7:40pm On Dec 14, 2014
Jennimma:
Okay,i'm number 4...but my mum isnt "stern faced" na lipsrsealed
From 'ur looks u clearly not No.4,I kinda agree with "op"

1 Like

Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by SHOCK7(m): 7:43pm On Dec 14, 2014
dechandel:

Hmmmm

Where do u fall?
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by nikkflexible(f): 7:44pm On Dec 14, 2014
tonychristopher:


Don't be yoked with unbelievers yolk
so other brothers outside my church are unbelievers lipsrsealed
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by Nobody: 7:48pm On Dec 14, 2014
sarutobie:
The ones who fall under number 3 are the most annoying! just shut up and let us concentrate on the sermon for pete's sake..dem go just dey do notice me with their "ride on pastor" ride to where exactly "yes pastor!" yes to wetin

Ride on softly. Na u b stranger na. Hahahahaha
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by SHOCK7(m): 7:50pm On Dec 14, 2014
MzPreshie:
Chai!! Me, mummy's girl? Issorait...
Put-up 'ur pic let's be d judge wink
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by Nobody: 7:55pm On Dec 14, 2014
Chuukwudi:
All these painticoastal churches sef. Such things don't happen in Anglican where I'm the organist.
I love anglican, I dnt feel comfortable in any other and all this doesn't happen truly
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by Nobody: 7:57pm On Dec 14, 2014
Tinubu:
1- The perpetual late comer: This one has an obsession with being noticed. She always 'majestically' dogwalks( not catwalk) into the church right in the middle of the service, swinging her small but 'standard' bumbum, head held high, and proceeds straight to the front row. Her 'long walk to freedom' most times succeeds in destabilizing the pious and godly 'Brothers in the Lord', who now have a hard time concentrating on 'Manna from above'. She is usually young, pretty, and very much a busybody. *marieolae*

2- The Extremely Gorgeous Chorister: This one is dropdead pretty, has an angelic voice, and is the church's golden girl. At times, she also leads praise and worship sessions. Her 'ministration' is most likely to lead a man to hell than heaven. Watching her 'dance to the Lord' is like watching soft porn.. It can cause a guy an embarrassing erection right there in the House of The Lord. She doesn't dress or act slutty, but her dressing and carriage is just modest enough to conceal the essentials, and revealing enough to make an aroused dude drop his whole month's salary into the offering Box. Too many brethren are seeking her hand in marriage, and she has her choice of pick among the church's most eligible bachelors. So she is a bit proud, condescending, and mostly unavailable if a guy tries to 'corner' her after church service. *Jennimma*

3- The loud ones: These girls usually come to church just to hoot, shout 'ride on pastor!', speak in tongues, and roll on the floor, during the pastor's Ministration. In my view, these are the Pastor's sycophants. They really make the Pastor look anointed, with all their psychedelic activity. They are the the ones who rush out when the pastor says that all virgins should come to the alter. They are also the ones who always fall around, breaking chairs, and alarming everyone , all in the name of being 'under the yoke of the anointing'. Stay away from these kind of girls, before them comot your eye, or cause u grave physical injury, while under their 'annointing'. *onila*

4- The 'Mummy's Girl': This one is always accompanied to church by her stern-faced mum. She is usually not older than 16, but looking very delectable and fresh. (You know that 'innocent freshness' girls usually have at one point in their teenage years, before 'everything' starts going south). A dude dare not come within talking distance of this chick. Her mum is far more interested in protecting her daughter's presumed innocence, than whatever it is the pastor is carrying on about. These are the kind of girls a guy can do nothing about, but admire from a safe distance, unless you wish to extend your investigation beyond God's House. *mzpreshie*


5- The young, beautiful and newly married girl: This one always has a permanent smile plastered on her face. Why she no go smile? She has broken the yoke of spinsterhood in grand style, and most unmarried sisters are envious of her 'progress'. Most of the time, she is married to a much older rich dude who is a member of the Pastor's inner caucus (the Church Cabal). She usually wears expensive wrappers, distracting headties (gele), and hardly stays at one place all through, and even after the service. No be her fault sha... Why she no go show herself? Husband don really scarce for town. *Kachisbarbie*




NOTE: This work is mine... Not copied and pasted from anywhere ..... So please don't ask me about the source... I AM THE SOURCE

6: The one that is always elegant looking for shell or Mobil worker to Conner, she keeps on looking around as if she wants to pick a pen on the floor or greet someone she knows. Kia!!!!!!!!!!!! Marriage don make me miss so many things sha and is good to be a comfortable bachelor for sometimes before marriage.
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by lilmax(m): 7:58pm On Dec 14, 2014
Jennimma:
Okay,i'm number 4...but my mum isnt "stern faced" na lipsrsealed
so you are 15

1 Like

Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by SHOCK7(m): 8:00pm On Dec 14, 2014
marieolae:
no 1 is definitely not me. I'm always on time embarassed..

Infact, I laugh at the ladies that do this
It drives me nuts.
So maybe u No.2
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by SHOCK7(m): 8:03pm On Dec 14, 2014
mayapop:
I'm actually number 4. "mummy's girl" cheesy we come to church together, i don't leave her sight, she got her eyes on me embarassed
Really but u older Dan 16!
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by tomiobj(m): 8:12pm On Dec 14, 2014
mayapop:
I'm actually number 4. "mummy's girl" cheesy we come to church together, i don't leave her sight, she got her eyes on me embarassed
and dosent let the pastor or choir master taste




Very sure ur an only child or only gal in d family
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by tomiobj(m): 8:13pm On Dec 14, 2014
Wat of gals that always cum Luke fresh and pretty but everytn on dem is a borrowed product.
Tinubu:
1- The perpetual late comer: This one has an obsession with being noticed. She always 'majestically' dogwalks( not catwalk) into the church right in the middle of the service, swinging her small but 'standard' bumbum, head held high, and proceeds straight to the front row. Her 'long walk to freedom' most times succeeds in destabilizing the pious and godly 'Brothers in the Lord', who now have a hard time concentrating on 'Manna from above'. She is usually young, pretty, and very much a busybody. *marieolae*

2- The Extremely Gorgeous Chorister: This one is dropdead pretty, has an angelic voice, and is the church's golden girl. At times, she also leads praise and worship sessions. Her 'ministration' is most likely to lead a man to hell than heaven. Watching her 'dance to the Lord' is like watching soft porn.. It can cause a guy an embarrassing erection right there in the House of The Lord. She doesn't dress or act slutty, but her dressing and carriage is just modest enough to conceal the essentials, and revealing enough to make an aroused dude drop his whole month's salary into the offering Box. Too many brethren are seeking her hand in marriage, and she has her choice of pick among the church's most eligible bachelors. So she is a bit proud, condescending, and mostly unavailable if a guy tries to 'corner' her after church service. *Jennimma*

3- The loud ones: These girls usually come to church just to hoot, shout 'ride on pastor!', speak in tongues, and roll on the floor, during the pastor's Ministration. In my view, these are the Pastor's sycophants. They really make the Pastor look anointed, with all their psychedelic activity. They are the the ones who rush out when the pastor says that all virgins should come to the alter. They are also the ones who always fall around, breaking chairs, and alarming everyone , all in the name of being 'under the yoke of the anointing'. Stay away from these kind of girls, before them comot your eye, or cause u grave physical injury, while under their 'annointing'. *onila*

4- The 'Mummy's Girl': This one is always accompanied to church by her stern-faced mum. She is usually not older than 16, but looking very delectable and fresh. (You know that 'innocent freshness' girls usually have at one point in their teenage years, before 'everything' starts going south). A dude dare not come within talking distance of this chick. Her mum is far more interested in protecting her daughter's presumed innocence, than whatever it is the pastor is carrying on about. These are the kind of girls a guy can do nothing about, but admire from a safe distance, unless you wish to extend your investigation beyond God's House. *mzpreshie*


5- The young, beautiful and newly married girl: This one always has a permanent smile plastered on her face. Why she no go smile? She has broken the yoke of spinsterhood in grand style, and most unmarried sisters are envious of her 'progress'. Most of the time, she is married to a much older rich dude who is a member of the Pastor's inner caucus (the Church Cabal). She usually wears expensive wrappers, distracting headties (gele), and hardly stays at one place all through, and even after the service. No be her fault sha... Why she no go show herself? Husband don really scarce for town. *Kachisbarbie*




NOTE: This work is mine... Not copied and pasted from anywhere ..... So please don't ask me about the source... I AM THE SOURCE
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by omakay(m): 8:39pm On Dec 14, 2014
Tinubu:
4- The 'Mummy's Girl': This one is always accompanied to church by her stern-faced mum. She is usually not older than 16, but looking very delectable and fresh. (You know that 'innocent freshness' girls usually have at one point in their teenage years, before 'everything' starts going south). A dude dare not come within talking distance of this chick. Her mum is far more interested in protecting her daughter's presumed innocence, than whatever it is the pastor is carrying on about. These are the kind of girls a guy can do nothing about, but admire from a safe distance, unless you wish to extend your investigation beyond God's House. *mzpreshie*

This one happens to be the easiest of all if only you adopt the right strategy.

Forget about the girl, make the mother your target.

Show the mother how much of an intelligent and innocent young man you are and with a bright future. ( Brighter than NEPA and generator light put together).

She will be the one handing over her daughter (Your Real Target) to you FREE OF CHARGE!!!!

Use the method and thank me later!!!!

grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin

1 Like

Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by Elparaiso(m): 8:44pm On Dec 14, 2014
Apart from mummy's girl....
All of them day my church!
#ChurchFellowship
I only go there to see people fool themselves
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by alpha75(m): 9:49pm On Dec 14, 2014
Tinubu:
1- The perpetual late comer: This one has an obsession with being noticed. She always 'majestically' dogwalks( not catwalk) into the church right in the middle of the service, swinging her small but 'standard' bumbum, head held high, and proceeds straight to the front row. Her 'long walk to freedom' most times succeeds in destabilizing the pious and godly 'Brothers in the Lord', who now have a hard time concentrating on 'Manna from above'. She is usually young, pretty, and very much a busybody. *marieolae*

2- The Extremely Gorgeous Chorister: This one is dropdead pretty, has an angelic voice, and is the church's golden girl. At times, she also leads praise and worship sessions. Her 'ministration' is most likely to lead a man to hell than heaven. Watching her 'dance to the Lord' is like watching soft porn.. It can cause a guy an embarrassing erection right there in the House of The Lord. She doesn't dress or act slutty, but her dressing and carriage is just modest enough to conceal the essentials, and revealing enough to make an aroused dude drop his whole month's salary into the offering Box. Too many brethren are seeking her hand in marriage, and she has her choice of pick among the church's most eligible bachelors. So she is a bit proud, condescending, and mostly unavailable if a guy tries to 'corner' her after church service. *Jennimma*

3- The loud ones: These girls usually come to church just to hoot, shout 'ride on pastor!', speak in tongues, and roll on the floor, during the pastor's Ministration. In my view, these are the Pastor's sycophants. They really make the Pastor look anointed, with all their psychedelic activity. They are the the ones who rush out when the pastor says that all virgins should come to the alter. They are also the ones who always fall around, breaking chairs, and alarming everyone , all in the name of being 'under the yoke of the anointing'. Stay away from these kind of girls, before them comot your eye, or cause u grave physical injury, while under their 'annointing'. *onila*

4- The 'Mummy's Girl': This one is always accompanied to church by her stern-faced mum. She is usually not older than 16, but looking very delectable and fresh. (You know that 'innocent freshness' girls usually have at one point in their teenage years, before 'everything' starts going south). A dude dare not come within talking distance of this chick. Her mum is far more interested in protecting her daughter's presumed innocence, than whatever it is the pastor is carrying on about. These are the kind of girls a guy can do nothing about, but admire from a safe distance, unless you wish to extend your investigation beyond God's House. *mzpreshie*


5- The young, beautiful and newly married girl: This one always has a permanent smile plastered on her face. Why she no go smile? She has broken the yoke of spinsterhood in grand style, and most unmarried sisters are envious of her 'progress'. Most of the time, she is married to a much older rich dude who is a member of the Pastor's inner caucus (the Church Cabal). She usually wears expensive wrappers, distracting headties (gele), and hardly stays at one place all through, and even after the service. No be her fault sha... Why she no go show herself? Husband don really scarce for town. *Kachisbarbie*




NOTE: This work is mine... Not copied and pasted from anywhere ..... So please don't ask me about the source... I AM THE SOURCE
U are a member of christ embassy.
Re: Five Types Of Girls You Meet In Church by DeevaB: 9:54pm On Dec 14, 2014
Hehehe..@ op am not on the list grin

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