Ngokafor:



...@op your wife was wrong to retaliate but your mum takes most of the blame like 90%..

..I just cant understand how some women just wont mind their home and leave their son and his family in peace ..

...i mean this story is really pathetic to say the least...an elderly woman that wont just respect herself.

..imagine going to another woman's house to bully and slap her around just because she is married to her son..what sort of nonsense is that?

....The boys crying mummy up and down on this thread should kindly abstain from marriage and live with their mums for the rest of their lives...no be by force to marry.

babyosisi:


Walk away is in verbal altercation
Man and wife arguing
You say man can strike the woman and be justified I said a mature man will walk away and will not hit the wife
I know you are too dense to sort these things out

anitank:


She came with a gang and still got beaten up I would be pained ...lessons learnt!

And OP said he loves his wife which shows she's a good woman and has been enduring MIL for God knows how long. He would be silly to let his family ruin his happiness by sending his wife out

Honestly you and babyosisi has made my day with your contributions on this thread

anitank:


She came with a gang and still got beaten up I would be pained ...lessons learnt!

And OP said he loves his wife which shows she's a good woman and has been enduring MIL for God knows how long. He would be silly to let his family ruin his happiness by sending his wife out

Honestly you and babyosisi has made my day with your contributions on this thread

freecocoa:
You see, MIL is wrong but it will never be okay that DIL hit back.

Na lawyer them dey call me for house, if I present my argument, my parents will say "so we are in a court now abi" still, I cannot do what DIL, why do I now call myself educated with class?

babyosisi:


She bears 99% of the blame and the DIL is still wanting to make peace and the one at fault is making shakara instisting the DIL leaves the house
The trouble maker now making the rules
Nonsense

BABE3:


plus then again, how is it possible to land slap on someone's face because they refused to give you a photo?

I'm 100% sure there was an intense verbal exchange before the slap landed.

Now, the moment the wife retaliated, was the moment she because an aggressor; an equal aggressor. So aggressive she left bruises on the mother's face.


Don't mind all these theory husbands on NL. Who would see their ma' with bruises on her face and still be forming "me and my wife"??

I'll so spaz out at that sight if I were OP. As in, I'll lose it!

It's a different case if it's wife vs SIL? But your ma'? That's tew much.

babyosisi:


Hahahahaha
That is her annoyance
Not only was she dealt with in the fight she started but her friend and family witnessed it
And rather than ask for a rematch tonsee if luck will shine her side,she wants the woman thrown out of her matrimonial home

No sister will stand by and watch their own sister beaten for no reason
The witnesses obviously saw who was at fault
The wife even took time off when this whole thing turned sour to call her hubby
Got off the phone and tawai tawai on her cheeks out of nowhere
And they wanted her to leave her parlor and go and cry inside her bedroom abi
So the woman will escape with the whole album and other valuables



Hahahahahahahaha


I am adding pepper now lol
Made my points much earlier sha

babyosisi:


Hahahahaha
That is her annoyance
Not only was she dealt with in the fight she started but her friend and family witnessed it
And rather than ask for a rematch to see if luck will shine her side,she wants the woman thrown out of her matrimonial home

No sister will stand by and watch their own sister beaten for no reason
The witnesses obviously saw who was at fault
The wife even took time off when this whole thing turned sour to call her hubby
Got off the phone and tawai tawai on her cheeks left and right out of nowhere
And they wanted her to leave her parlor and go and cry inside her bedroom abi
So the woman will kukuma escape with the whole album and other valuables



Hahahahahahahaha


I am adding pepper now lol
Made my points much earlier sha

freecocoa:
Believe me, no one has this mentality of, "Being an elder doesn't give you right to misbehave" than me, I totally agree that being older doesn't mean wiser or superior, I believe that respect is reciprocal, everyone deserves respect.

Still, there is this unwritten rule about respecting elders first, MIL was wrong no doubt, she hit DIL, do you sincerely believe hitting and fighting her is the best way to go about the issue? Will you support hitting anyone back immediately without thinking twice let alone an elder? Understand that I agree MIL is at fault btw.

This is about manners, it's not just about always being right, I believe the two holy books instructed that elders/parents be honored, does the fact that mama broke a commandment mean you should break one? What makes you wiser than mama then? If this wife behaves like this already, she'll be worse than mama later on.

Sophyrocks:


Truly, for Op to state here that he loves his wife inspite of all that has happened shows the wife has endured a lot. Perhaps she has swallowed all sorts, been the bigger person in most cases but eventually had it up to here and so exploded the way she did. She was even jovial with her MIL and her people. That says a lot. This is just a case of accumulated grievances acting as a time bomb. Thats how i see it. How long will a woman put up with been taking for granted? Theres a limit to everything.

perfectionist:
Nairalanders, I'm in a quagmire! About one week ago, my mother came to visit my family with her sister and a friend. After the preliminary greetings and felicitations, I proceeded to take leave of my guests in order to go and service my car, leaving them in the hands of my wife after having provided some refreshments for them.
Now, my wife and mother have no love lost between them and barely get along but the joviality they displayed together in my presence combined with the fact that my mother's sister and friend were also around made me to believe all will be well and nothing will go wrong.
No sooner had I left home than I received a frantic call from my wife to return quickly that all hell had broken loose.
Upon getting home, I found my mother and my wife on the 3-seater going at each other with both wailing. I managed to separate them and proceeded to find the cause of the fight. I was told by the two onlookers (mother's sister and a friend) that my wife prevented my mother from taking some photos of the child dedication we did a few weeks back from the photo album. This incensed my mother and led to my wife being slapped following which all hell was broken loose. My mother even sustained a deep scratch on her face.
Now, my family members have insisted that my wife must leave the house for committing this abomination (their words, not mine). Indeed, my mother has told me in no uncertain terms that mother and son relationship has ended as long as my wife continues to remain in the house.
I love my wife and has two young children with her but this whole issue has complicated things.
What should I do? Your candid advice and suggestions will be appreciated.

freecocoa:
I am definitely not a push over and can never be one, but I was raised well, I get what I want by how I act, you should command respect.

If my MIL for any reason slaps me, I will not hit her back but she will never try it again.

If you know better than someone, you don't act like them.


There can be exceptions, where it's necessary to hit back, this is too petty.

crackhaus:
I don't understand why a woman would even get married to a man whose mother she doesn't get along with, I mean the first person a woman should become close to in her prospective husband's family should be his mother - they should bond and relate well with each other during the courting period.

This is what happens when women rush into marriage for some silly materialistic & vain reason without first knowing and bonding with the prospective husband's family, especially the mother.
Once a woman is able to win over her intended MIL and relate with her like her own biological mother before the wedding, it would take a really big fvck up to make that MIL turn against her later.


Both mother and wife deserve each other, bunch of local toutish disrespectful dumb cvnts with no self-respect whatsoever.
Fighting over pictures, who does that...

anitank:


You'd make a good commentator I swear
MIL got served!
You won't believe the main reason I'm refusing to marry one guy is because his mother is the one managing all his account in Nigeria, and even the contractor to the house he's building. Nne m, I can't deal with the stress that comes with marrying a mummy's boy

anitank:


You'd make a good commentator I swear
MIL got served!
You won't believe the main reason I'm refusing to marry one guy is because his mother is the one managing all his account in Nigeria, and even the contractor to the house he's building. Nne m, I can't deal with the stress that comes with marrying a mummy's boy

crackhaus:
I don't understand why a woman would even get married to a man whose mother she doesn't get along with, I mean the first person a woman should become close to in her prospective husband's family should be his mother - they should bond and relate well with each other during the courting period.

This is what happens when women rush into marriage for some silly materialistic & vain reason without first knowing and bonding with the prospective husband's family, especially the mother.
Once a woman is able to win over her intended MIL and relate with her like her own biological mother before the wedding, it would take a really big fvck up to make that MIL turn against her later.


Both mother and wife deserve each other, bunch of local toutish disrespectful dumb cvnts with no self-respect whatsoever.
Fighting over pictures, who does that...

perfectionist:
Nairalanders, I'm in a quagmire! About one week ago, my mother came to visit my family with her sister and a friend. After the preliminary greetings and felicitations, I proceeded to take leave of my guests in order to go and service my car, leaving them in the hands of my wife after having provided some refreshments for them.
Now, my wife and mother have no love lost between them and barely get along but the joviality they displayed together in my presence combined with the fact that my mother's sister and friend were also around made me to believe all will be well and nothing will go wrong.
No sooner had I left home than I received a frantic call from my wife to return quickly that all hell had broken loose.
Upon getting home, I found my mother and my wife on the 3-seater going at each other with both wailing. I managed to separate them and proceeded to find the cause of the fight. I was told by the two onlookers (mother's sister and a friend) that my wife prevented my mother from taking some photos of the child dedication we did a few weeks back from the photo album. This incensed my mother and led to my wife being slapped following which all hell was broken loose. My mother even sustained a deep scratch on her face.
Now, my family members have insisted that my wife must leave the house for committing this abomination (their words, not mine). Indeed, my mother has told me in no uncertain terms that mother and son relationship has ended as long as my wife continues to remain in the house.
I love my wife and has two young children with her but this whole issue has complicated things.
What should I do? Your candid advice and suggestions will be appreciated.

justwise:


These two people don't like each probably because the MIL was not in support of the marriage , so the MIL purposely went there with two other women to cause trouble. Why did she not wait for the son to come back to give her the picture rather she slapped the DIL because she refused to give her the picture?

freecocoa:
The reason why I think the wife takes greater blame.

MIL might have gotten offended, thinking "how can this small girl be insulting me like this" and gave DIL a resounding slap, DIL being the " be you who, I no send" type showed mama say she doesn't give a hoot., this type of people are hardly innocent.

The truth is that, no matter how much one's parents respects them, there can and always is a time when they expect you to recognize authority, it is a very good quality everyone should have, DIL doesn't seem like someone to make excuses for in cases like this.

For MIL to go straight to take pictures doesn't mean she's bossy, my mum is one of the gentlest and most humble people I know, her kind of humility even pisses us off sometimes(no exaggeration) yet she will do something like take the pictures because she's genuinely happy, DIL could easily get those pictures back, she is not in any way supposed to fight because of it, an oppressed person doesn't behave this way.

justwise:


These two people don't like each probably because the MIL was not in support of the marriage , so the MIL purposely went there with two other women to cause trouble. Why did she not wait for the son to come back to give her the picture rather she slapped the DIL because she refused to give her the picture?

babyosisi:


I was afraid common sense had left the forum till I read this
Thank you Lord



Still reading

Chillis:


weldone oh.

calling OPs mum and wife cvnts!
na wah for you!

egobetatoday:



from what i have read and understwnd, your mum is at fault even thou your wife was wronf for fighting with her.

i will analise it this way:
if there's no love lost btw them why did your mother insist on taking the pix? i want to bliv your mother have shown your wife from the very start that she doesnt like her and the lady understands that. or what else could warrant your wife denying your mother those pix? the truth is this, when someone shows you she doesnt like you, especially some1 like a MIL, you shouldnt expect your wife to trust her withg wr anything. please we are all humans n we have blood running in our veins. if your mother has shown her that she doesnt like her, do u expect your wife to trust her with those pix? i wouldnt trust such a MIL too. your mom is supposed to accept n love her n she(wife) is supposed to love her in return for your sake. i'm married tooo and if i have to count my blessings, my MIL will be one because she had always shown me that she loved me. she actually lives in the same town with us but we have never had issues. infact she pampers me; imaging someone who cooks and sends to me? i mean not only during festivities oo? infact if she needs any pix i could send 10 copies to her because i know if she ever picks it and mutters any thing it will be prayers for us. i could go on and on and on. infact she is more than a mother n i keep praying for her. if she slaps me today i will kneel down quickly n apologise cos i know i must have done somthing wrong. do u think your wife wouldnt have loved to have such a mil? the only problem i have with your wife is that she fought with ur mum which u need to scold her for. infact dont talk with her for 2 days to send home your annoyance. but i'm sure u know its not her fault because u know ur wife n ur mum very well. u should know who the troublesome person is.

u said your wife called to inform u to return home quickly. isnt it obvious she had no plans for the issue to deteriorate? dont u think if she had plans to fix your mother that day she wouldnt have called u to return? infact u would have only been aware when u got home in the night, dont u think so? i am sure she had to call when the insult from your mum was getting unbearable. And your mum still went ahead to slap her? well i suspect ur mum saw it as an opportunity to deal with your wife and she(wife) foolishly fell for it.

if these have happened why will ur mum insist that she leaves u? could it be that its because she never loved your wife? i bliv your wife is very very wrong for fighting your mum but why did your mum push her to that extent? there is a saying in my place that if the younger person doesnt know the right thing to do then it is imperative that the older person knows. your mum shouldnt insist that she leaves because she can never take the place of a wife in your life the same way your wife can never replace your mum. ur wife is your wife n ur mother is your mother. u shouldnt take sides with any of them. try to settle it amicably amongst them and let both of them know u are angry with them. Dnt hide ur feelings at all. your wife shld go and apologise on both knees crying and apologising. she shld go with gifts for her too. then it is important that your mum accepts the apologies. if your wife refuses to do that then she is the problem. on the other hand if your mum refuses to accept apologies then she is the problem. anyone of them who wouldnt atleast for your sakes accept these terms is the major problem u have. what has happened has happened.

only boys who are mummys handbag would send their wife away just because mummy said so. REMEMBER WHAT GOD HAS JOINED TOGETHER LET NO MAN/WOMAN PUT ASSUNDER.

BABE3:


I was going to add that. You beat me to it.

All these drama between in-laws and wives can be avoided. I dunno how people gather strength to constantly deal with bad in-laws. Stay away from them in the first place; especially if the husband is #teamMum or #I'mNeutral.

I mean, there are too many families available to settle for a hostile one.

But some people love drama though. They love the constant power struggle.

Sophyrocks:


Chimooooo. You did well by picking up your shoes to run four fourty!! Mama's boys are one of the most horrible men to marry o. His mother was his financial manager ke? how old was this dude? so he is incapable of running it himself?

bukatyne:


You do not take the property of people you are not in good terms with.

MIL certainly knew that she and DIL were not good and still went to pick pictures

When you go to someone's house, you do things as they want you to do it.

The earlier inlaws realize that, the better for them.

I am talking as an inlaw and a wife (both sides)

pomsky:



......you are rude, and worse still, thanking the Lord for it.
Time will tell whether it's you that has the sense!!!

babyosisi:


Hahahahahahahaha
I don laff taya

You already know what will happen in marriage so you are better off keeping away
But if you and the man will live in Obodo Oyibo and he's a good man you can manage that well
Believe me the inlaw issues are much better in such circumstances