Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker - TV/Movies - Nairaland
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| Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by TheFilmmaker: 2:56pm On Jun 11, 2015 |
Hello. I've had this script for a while and I will appreciate criticism in anyway and for you deem fit. Um, this is not the final draft...You're permitted to point out any glaring mistakes and I will re-edit accordingly. Thank you.  FADE IN A brightly lit DINNING ROOM. The table is lavishly set for THREE. USMAN, an obviously bright 7 year old kid with short hair, and large bright eyes; a more older, butch MAN, probably in his early forties is munching something. A tired frail-looking older WOMAN is sitting opposite the MAN,(possibly the MAN's wife)wearing a shawl and is using the cutlery, her gaze forlorn. There is an eerie silence, except for the clatter of dishes and cutlery. CANDLES FLICKER a bit. MAN (VO) My son, Usman, is only 7 years old, and he’s never really had a friend... USMAN (splutters, then coughs) MAN (fumbles with cutlery) So, you were going to say something, Usman. USMAN (munching, between mouthfuls) Uh, yeah I...think I made a new friend at school today. WOMAN (beams, drops cutlery, rearranges her shawl) BEAT Now, that is amazing, USMAN. What is his name? USMAN (silence) MAN Yes USMAN, that was very nice. Tell me about it...about this...new friend. BEAT Is he into sports? Is he Hausa? USMAN No, I..I don't think so. I don't really know. We just started talking. He's very good at maths, though. MAN (shares excited glances with WOMAN) Nice, my boy. Come on, eat up. USMAN His name is ADE. Can I invite him to dinner tomorrow? WOMAN (brights up) Why, yes. That would be good, my boy. DISHES CLATTER while USMAN tries to consume as much as possible before heading to the sink. MAN and WOMAN look bewildered. FADE OUT EXT. ENTRANCE. EVENING. It's drizzling outside. USMAN is visibly happy. Right beside him is a nice looking little boy. Almost same age. Bright eyes. USMAN motions forward. Takes off his coat. They both steps into - - THE HALLWAY USMAN Hi, Dad. This is Ade! MAN (surprised) WOW! Hi, Ade (To ADE, offers his hand) How are you doing, er... ADE (silent) USMAN (ice cold stare) Ade isn't real, dad. MAN (taken aback, repressed shock) What... Oh. Welcome Ade. Never mind, USMAN. He's just being a funny host. (looks tense) USMAN looks bitter, and walks off to his room. ADE walks behind him, not saying a word. FADE OUT. LATER INT.NIGHT.DINNER[ USMAN is giving both the MAN and WOMAN mean looks. ADE is helping himself with a half filled plate. He doesn't say anything. His gaze is fixed on the table. USMAN has his fork held in a menacing position. Both the MAN and WOMAN look tense but act uninterested. USMAN (irritated) Why did you give Ade a plate? Ade’s not real. MAN (dazed, startled) BEAT Why did you invite Ade over if you’re just going to be rude? (extends his arms, giving up) That's not a nice way to treat friends... USMAN returns to eating his yams. Unfazed. SUDDENLY- USMAN Stop being weird! There is no Ade! MAN (visibly fed up) Now listen little champ. You've got to be polite to your friend or you would be grounded for a week. No video games, no rec. And no noddles. OK (to ADE) I am sorry for your friend's behavior, really. How's the meal, Ade? ADE says nothing. Smiles back. Faintly. SUDDENLY USMAN grabs ADE’s plate and heads to the sink. ADE does not protest. WOMAN USMAN! USMAN!!! What rubbish/nonsense is this? What is wrong with you tonight? (shrieks) Go into your room, USMAN. NOW! USMAN...! WOMAN storms out of the dinning and follows USMAN to the KITCHEN. She steps into the -- KITCHEN ENTRANCE ALMOST INSTANTLY, USMAN HURLS ADE’s plate at the WOMAN'S head. The plate misses, hits the wall and shatters. USMAN is fuming with fury. The WOMAN is in complete shock, petrified. WOMAN (pants, screams wide eyed) (exclaims in Hausa language) MAN comes blazing from the dining, horrified at the WOMAN's composure. Casts a glance at USMAN, who is still fuming. The WOMAN is in complete shock. She mutters something inaudibly, her bulging eyes darts from USMAN to a fat butcher knife right next to him. MAN Fatima...what! Are you Crazy? USMAN! What has taken over you! (Supports the WOMAN from falling backwards, helps her rest, terrified.) WOMAN I'll be alright... Stands on her feet, heads upstairs. MAN turns to USMAN, who is now crying, sobbing profusely. USMAN (between sobs) Why did you yell at me? MAN (confused, clenched teeth) I’m sorry USMAN. But what you tried to do to your mother is inexcusable. USMAN (sniffs) But… but she’s not real… MAN (freezes up) WHAT? USMAN Like… like Ade my friend. I made him up like you made mommy up. I wanted you to see how weird it was to make someone up. But you didn’t even notice... MAN (outraged) What the f*** are you talking about?! USMAN (muffled sobs and sniffing) Y-you got really sad when mommy left and wanted to take me with her, and then you left to talk to her and I never saw her again. You’ve been acting like she’s been here, but-- MAN (stunned) SHUT UP!!! With lightening force, MAN slams USMAN’s head down against the tile floor. Immediately, a sharp cracking sound is heard. USMAN flips, no longer breathing, his eyes glassy. Mouth agape. There is a deep bloody gash on his forehead. Blood gushes out. MAN is shocked, unable to grasp what has just happened a few seconds ago. Stares at his son's limp lifeless body. Scampers around, grabs a shovel, and carries the dead body out to the-- BACKYARD MAN begins to dig the soil. Five shovel-full of soil out and a face of a FEMALE corpse appears under. MAN panics and quickly fills up the dug space. MAN vanishes into the dark distance carrying dead USMAN. INT. NIGHT. DINNING. Ade still sitting. Unfazed. MAN (staggers and pants heavily. Stop short in front of ADE. Regains composure. His face is a bit smudged with mud and sweat. Wipes his forehead with a stained kerchief. takes a deep breath) Ade, how would you like to be my new son? ADE smiles again. FADE OUT. Copyright© 2015 Duru Collins. All Rights Reserved. 13 Likes 6 Shares |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by Nobody: 3:53pm On Jun 11, 2015 |
Hahaha I love this. It need some touches here and there, but I really really really really really love this. This is my kind of story, I can already visualize it in my head. Nice one. |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by prof800(m): 5:28pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
I love this!  The twist is just so so cool. I can read it over and over again and I can't wait to see the short film.  Nice one man. I hope you make this into a wonderful short like cnario did with "paranoia". Sholay2011 come and see something before you go Canada ooo! Let a film maker purchase this script and shoot the damn thing abeg. cc: briareos, idprincess, lynx200, dejavu, komex, sojioguns, semid4lyfe, seun.  1 Like |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by sholay2011(m): 5:39pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
Lol@prof. @Op...Nice one bro. First got confused with the idea before getting it. And the thought of the 'man' is scary...evil personified. Thumbs up. |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by VillageBoi(m): 6:22pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
How come I've read this somewhere before? |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by lynx200(m): 6:27pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
Dude, this is sick! I am loving this. Gawd, we have writers in this land meeen! Good job filmmaker |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by UjSizzle(f): 7:09pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
Oh God is this sick! Exciting too  I wasn't even sure what to expect.... I'd love to see this made into a short film too. TheFilmMaker, you are talented but I guess you already know that cc Lalasticlala Ishilove this is so FP worthy. |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by Flashh: 7:40pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
Nice one bro! Honestly i haven't read it all but will do later!  2 Likes |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by joystickextendr: 7:40pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
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| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by freedom96: 7:40pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
Hmm.I dey watch una. |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by Rumpelstiltskin(m): 7:41pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
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| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by phonespecs: 7:41pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
Nigerian Writers are doing Great.... Mods, abeg make i promote my product small . SPACE BOOKED PERMANENTLY.... . check the Pic below |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by tociano009(m): 7:42pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
A |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by tunwumi: 7:44pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
Well written. I don''t have the time to go through it oooo |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by greatbaba(m): 7:47pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
J |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by holicalpha(m): 7:49pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
Click like if you just want to claim F |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by pato1(m): 7:56pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
Nice 1 bro... Its not easy to put things together as u hv just done... Keep it up |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by oathman(m): 7:57pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
My Name **MODIFIED** Usman nd his Imaginary friend
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| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by phemocheee(m): 8:03pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
Am l the only person that doesn't understand this? 6 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by ugojamali(m): 8:16pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
Nice nice story. Like Paranoia this is chilling any blood cuddling. Now who's crazy hahahaha? At first I thought the boy was crazy but then... What a sick father. Classic. Just work on your script formatting a bit... For example most of those words in parenthesis shouldn't be there. You may want to do away with most of the parenthesis. Also in the beginning you described Usman as obviously bright. Good. But you're telling us, not showing us. You should be able to visually show us why you say that Usman is bright. 3 Likes |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by omaji53jeremiah: 8:18pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
hmmmmmmm |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by UjSizzle(f): 8:20pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
VillageBoi:You have? |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by Omotayor123(f): 8:25pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
phemocheee:same here ooo |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by Omotayor123(f): 8:27pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
cnario:I don't really understand the message... can you explain pls  |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by Omotayor123(f): 8:29pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
prof800:I don't understand the script ooo |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by youngice(m): 8:36pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
this is sick |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by hameina(f): 8:44pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
..Thumbs Up |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by Lordave: 8:45pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
What is this? After the Dark |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by Nobody: 8:52pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
OK, the story is not real. |
| Re: Usman - A Short Psychological Thriller Script By TheFilmmaker by armadeo(m): 8:52pm On Jun 12, 2015 |
beautifully done. impressive |
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