carinmom:
You've nailed it wallahi, this is the sad reality of about 90% of our marriages.

I once listened to a tafsir done in the month of Ramadan where the Sheikh was asking his audience about practicing the prophetic suna of bathing together with one's spouse, of course the whole audience was silent.

AbdelKabir:


As in ehn.....if couples do this for each other.....some men might not think of a second wife.......

AbdelKabir:
THE AFRICAN COUPLES

Whoever says "most african couples' are not romantic is absolutely telling the truth.....

Being romantic is one of the prophet's noble attribute, we will not stop emphasizing it until more and more people practice it, its gradually becoming one of his forgotten legacies and many marriages have broken because of it.....

Many marriages are just about sleeping, waking, eating, cooking, raising the kids, working and ageing together till death comes.....

Many couples only hug eachother when they receive a goodnews....

They only kiss eachother during copulation....

The husband only puts food in his wife's mouth when she is terminally ill and unable to feed herself....

Many wives only buy gifts for their husbands when he is hospitalized.....

The only time couples race together is when there is danger somewhere and evryone is running....

The only thing that makes couples go for an evening stroll is when they have something vital to discuss and they dont want the children to hear......

The only time some couples eat together is when their inlaws are around......

The only thing that makes couples bath together is when they have a flight to catch and they are running late already.....

The only thing that makes an african man touch his wife's neck is when she complains of fever, afterwards he won't touch it again, till her next fever.....

The only thing that makes an african woman look closely into the eyes of her husband is when he complains of dirts in his eyes.....

The only thing that makes an average man carry his wife on his arms is when she is in labour and he is rushing her to the hospital......

The only thing that makes an average woman stroke her husband's beards is when she is removing dirts from it.....

People do say:
If you see an african couple sitted in front of their house in the evening, you may think they are romantic, but they are only waiting for the smell of the ota-pia-pia to vanish.....

If you see a man opening the door of his car for his wife, its either the car is new or the wife is new....

How won't the rate of divorce and infidelity increase when most marriages have no sweetness?

Allaah says:
In the messenger of Allaah is the best example for you to follow....

Taken from Qurratu ayn pg 112-113(unpublished).

carinmom:


Hahahahaah, that's true oo, our main problem is ignorance

Amoto94:
OP you failed to include the name of the writer otherwise all what you posted is true.

AbdelKabir:


And ego......everyone "forming" for each other....after all you own each other, even if you act childish when together....its cute.

carinmom:


Yes I quite agree with you, but the men are mostly to be blamed here, their mindsets are that if they are being romantic to their wives, they will stop respecting them.

AbdelKabir:


Is that 100% false?

carinmom:


I think it all depends on individual.

AbdelKabir:


I added where it was taken from *that was how it was sent to me*.....

Taken from Qurratu ayn pg 112-113(unpublished).

AbdelKabir:
THE AFRICAN COUPLES

Whoever says "most african couples' are not romantic is absolutely telling the truth.....

Being romantic is one of the prophet's noble attribute, we will not stop emphasizing it until more and more people practice it, its gradually becoming one of his forgotten legacies and many marriages have broken because of it.....

Many marriages are just about sleeping, waking, eating, cooking, raising the kids, working and ageing together till death comes.....

Many couples only hug eachother when they receive a goodnews....

They only kiss eachother during copulation....

The husband only puts food in his wife's mouth when she is terminally ill and unable to feed herself....

Many wives only buy gifts for their husbands when he is hospitalized.....

The only time couples race together is when there is danger somewhere and evryone is running....

The only thing that makes couples go for an evening stroll is when they have something vital to discuss and they dont want the children to hear......

The only time some couples eat together is when their inlaws are around......

The only thing that makes couples bath together is when they have a flight to catch and they are running late already.....

The only thing that makes an african man touch his wife's neck is when she complains of fever, afterwards he won't touch it again, till her next fever.....

The only thing that makes an african woman look closely into the eyes of her husband is when he complains of dirts in his eyes.....

The only thing that makes an average man carry his wife on his arms is when she is in labour and he is rushing her to the hospital......

The only thing that makes an average woman stroke her husband's beards is when she is removing dirts from it.....

People do say:
If you see an african couple sitted in front of their house in the evening, you may think they are romantic, but they are only waiting for the smell of the ota-pia-pia to vanish.....

If you see a man opening the door of his car for his wife, its either the car is new or the wife is new....


How won't the rate of divorce and infidelity increase when most marriages have no sweetness?

Allaah says:
In the messenger of Allaah is the best example for you to follow....

Taken from Qurratu ayn pg 112-113(unpublished).

Amoto94:
Qurratu ayn by who? Books may have the same name but different authors. Like Usool us-Sunnah of Imam al-Humaydee and Usool us-Sunnah of Imam Ahmad bin Hanbal (radyallahu anhuma).

personal59:




please why don't you quote the writer abu baanat

Deejay1000:
jazakallahu kairan

nigerian couples dont even call there wives by their names u will hear something like mama aishat, baba usman etc..

the only time they go out together is during meetings .. we the younger generations can change all these though

snapscore:
#teamforeignmen

Joking

Being romantic isn't dependent on where an individual comes from, but culture plays a role in what we perceive as romantic.

AbdelKabir:


It cracked me up so much that I was unable to laugh...

I think there is a contradiction...maybe you might want to expatiate...

snapscore:


Okay.

Well since I had teamforeign men up there since the post was aimed at African men. I thought I would state that being romantic isn't fully dependent on culture or where we grow up, but culture can affect what we see as romantic.

Being romantic isn't dependent on where an individual comes from....

... but culture plays a role in what we perceive as romantic.

AbdelKabir:



Perhaps I'm not getting your point that's why I asked for expatiation....

snapscore:


Culture affects what we see/ interpret as romantic. The same way culture affects what see as gender roles norms.
For example if a person grew up in a culture where men are harsh, strict and don't give gifts to women. That is the norm for his culture but that doesn't stop him from doing those actions. If because of the love he has for his wife, he gets her gifts and is sensitive to her, he does that as an individual based on his values and not the cultural norm. I am bad at using examples but in simple words, there are a variety of factors that affect how a person perceives romance. I will add fully dependent to my first comment.