When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love - Romance (3) - Nairaland
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| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by alubarika1: 11:10pm On Sep 09, 2012 |
190:[color=#006600][/color]  u beta D ? wit him nd pray to ur Lord for assistance |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by tracyxx: 12:46am On Sep 10, 2012 |
I really appreciate NLforun,it helps me to ease myself when am hurt.i decided to ignore his cheatin habits n try to trust him after discussin it wth him.this evenin event changed my mind totaly.As we were eatin, his phone rang n he cut d call,then I insisted he shld call the lady back since he said she is jus a friend.the conversation was nt mutual,in annoyance I took d phone n warned her seriouly. Still boilin I told my hubby to call her back n put it on speakets since he was still denyin.only 4 me to b insulted when I heard her tell my hubby "so you were there when your wife was insulting me".Right now am turn apart because now it shows there's more to dis lady because of d guts she has.God pls I nid ur help this just to much for me. |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Mynd44: 6:43am On Sep 10, 2012 |
^^ I advice you take this to the family section. Cos as for me, I can't tolerate a cheating partner married or not 1 Like |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by frank317: 7:09am On Sep 10, 2012 |
tracyxx: I really appreciate NLforun,it helps me to ease myself when am hurt.i decided to ignore his cheatin habits n try to trust him after discussin it wth him.this evenin event changed my mind totaly.As we were eatin, his phone rang n he cut d call,then I insisted he shld call the lady back since he said she is jus a friend.the conversation was nt mutual,in annoyance I took d phone n warned her seriouly. Still boilin I told my hubby to call her back n put it on speakets since he was still denyin.only 4 me to b insulted when I heard her tell my hubby "so you were there when your wife was insulting me".Right now am turn apart because now it shows there's more to dis lady because of d guts she has.God pls I nid ur help this just to much for me. Nobody said u shuld trust him, how can u trust a fellow human? Even someone u suspect? he is cheating on u and u knew it even b4 u opened this thread. Why boil up as if its something new. Control ur emotiions lady. The problem wit u is that u decide to listen to few pple on this thread who are condeming him and making u know u shuld get angry. Its ur husband nt theirs. Now its time u stop complaining and control ur emotions I would have been glad, if u had said that wen the call came, u asked him to pick the call and u guys continued eating as if nothing happened. Even if u want to get angry, be subtle, talk like a well trained lady. Let him know u are not happy with him, u are hurt. Let him see ur pain. U musnt display anger to do this. Suggest things u guys shuld do together, dress to kill, hang out with friends, save some money and take him out, smile more even though u are hurt. Stop being docile, buy him gift, communicate, share ur days xperience with him. Like I said before (which u chose to ignore and listen to pple that will turn u to a monster) remember the good old days u met and try to relive it. In all, anger will only worsen things in this situation. If u wish call me on 08027410988, I can help u, I promise u. 1 Like |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Mynd44: 7:25am On Sep 10, 2012 |
I am smelling a rat in form of a scam |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Okontami: 1:35pm On Sep 10, 2012 |
@Poster, you will never learn. I am angry with your attitude. Do you think you can do it alone? The bible said " by strength shall no man prevail"? Do you think he can change just because of your shouting and warning. I said take it to the Lord in prayers and you will see what he can do. You are not acting like someone who believe in God. Your believe in God looks like just a lip service. You are in for plenty troubles and problem if you continue this way. You could even loose your husband to his mistresses if you don't acknowledge God's power and what he can do. The bible said, i am the Lord of all flesh, is there anything too difficult for me to do. If you speak to the mountain to move , it will surely move with faith. Take my advise and Love him more. That is the key to your breakthrough. If you follow the word of the worldly people,you will regret it. |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by scribble: 2:36pm On Sep 10, 2012 |
tracyxx: I know your type,one that can never be faithful.God help your spouse o Ur d one here complaining about ur husband and now chastizing another man. Look dear, a man cheating on his wife is not proof he doesn't love you. Its proof he's unfaithful and if u live in usa, u can use that as grounds for divorce. U suspect him of cheating and don't want to leave him or kill him. This means u still love him and probably cos he takes care of you. Thus he is caring. A polygamous man that has 4 wives and takes care of all of them, can he be accused of cheating? U Naija women just want everything. Monogamy is not even our true heritage but whatever men are marrying ONE wife to please y'all and their religion. That should suffice. You now want him to poke only you even though am sure u know u aint got it like that when y'all first started. Besides some men NEED variety. Can u cook a soup with only kpomo? |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Mynd44: 3:56pm On Sep 10, 2012 |
^^ May you ISP go offline permanently 1 Like |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Adaeze003(f): 6:04pm On Sep 10, 2012 |
pc guru: |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Adaeze003(f): 6:16pm On Sep 10, 2012 |
pc guru: I agree! Cheating isn't right and it'll never be. I think frank is only trying to justify his cheating on his gf. @frank, since its no big deal to cheat in your world, have you told your gf you're cheating on her but that she's always the no 1? |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Nobody: 6:34pm On Sep 10, 2012 |
Common sense no common at all |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Okontami: 7:02pm On Sep 10, 2012 |
Maria-G:Maria G, please explain your self clearly. When people come here to share their life experience, they are here to get sincere advise and not sense*less phrase like this. Where did you hide your brain?? If you can not be clear with what you mean by Common sense no common at all, then get your fil*thy mouth ,life and soul out of here. |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by naijacutee(f): 8:13pm On Sep 10, 2012 |
@ OP. Please, for the sake of your health NEVER EVER ignore your mans cheating ways. Do you know they can kill you? What if he brings you HIV?!! |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by frank317: 10:01pm On Sep 10, 2012 |
Adaeze003: I can't believe that u can make such comments after reading all my post... This is crazy, I don't want to believe u don't understand English. Pls read my post once again and come back to talk to me. Read witout a biased mind, it actually hurts that pple lack understanding, no wonder we are in a great mess. Pls I never said cheating is cool, I already provided a perfect explanation as to why men or her husband cheat. Gosh, Ok point out where I said cheatin is cool in all my posts. |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Adaeze003(f): 1:23am On Sep 11, 2012 |
^^ hmm I don't believe we're fighting here. That said, i did read your posts but all I saw was excuse upon excuse. Trying to make it seem like guys have no control over their desires and women should learn to accommodate that. If cheating is not cool, why are you creating all these excuses for men?? Call it as it is bro. It is WRONG! |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Nobody: 1:44am On Sep 11, 2012 |
scribble:Wow just when i thought someone couldn't get any lower than that, i pity the person that happens to marry you. |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by frank317: 8:40am On Sep 11, 2012 |
Adaeze003: ^^ hmm I don't believe we're fighting here. That said, i did read your posts but all I saw was excuse upon excuse. Trying to make it seem like guys have no control over their desires and women should learn to accommodate that. If cheating is not cool, why are you creating all these excuses for men?? Call it as it is bro. It is WRONG! I have always come across pple who ask "y do men cheat?" dome would ask "y do men cheat and yet get angrier when their wives cheat? Probably u have asked such questions b4. Well, all I did in my post was to give u the answer the best way that I could. The answers I gave are based on empirical research. Y do u chose to call it an excuse for men to cheat, its jst a statement of fact not an excuse. Wheather its wrong or rite, the fact still remains that more men cheat than women and more women get hut by it. Y then did u chose to ignore my advice to her? If I was sayin cheatin was cool, wouldn't I have asked the poster to let her man continue cos its right? The fact is dat my profession does not allow me to b judgemental especially in psychological matters like this. We only seek explanation to certain human behaviors and xpected that people affected by these undesirable behavious could have a clearer picture and take bold steps towards the right directionbcos of their mental health. Yes I have cheated on my fiancé in my weak moments, don't crucify and judge me cos of this. I am only a human and I try personally to do things that wouldn't hurt her, she is happy wit me and her hapiness is my utmost concern. Forget me, I can handle her and she can handle me. But can u handle ur man? Are u sure he does not cheat on u once in a while? Rmember humans will always b human. And 85 to 95percent of men cheat. Shuld we sit down and jst call it wrong while they still continue? |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Adaeze003(f): 10:43am On Sep 11, 2012 |
Lol @ shifting to me. Well i believe that if you truly love someone you should not hurt the person so if you know that cheating will hurt her then why would you cheat? I've been told that men are kinda 'programmed' to sleep with more than one woman but I refuse to believe that men can't control their desires(they aint animals). And uhm your 'facts' are still excuses to me. Who even said men cheat more? Cos I've heard frnds complain about their women so I think its a two way street and I wander what you'll do if you find out she also cheated in her 'weak moments'. Be a man, stick to your commitment and encourage others too. Don't give them a 'licence' to cheat. |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Nobody: 2:40pm On Sep 11, 2012 |
absolutely not! |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by frank317: 3:38pm On Sep 11, 2012 |
Adaeze003: Lol @ shifting to me. Well i believe that if you truly love someone you should not hurt the person so if you know that cheating will hurt her then why would you cheat? I've been told that men are kinda 'programmed' to sleep with more than one woman but I refuse to believe that men can't control their desires(they aint animals). And uhm your 'facts' are still excuses to me. Who even said men cheat more? Cos I've heard frnds complain about their women so I think its a two way street and I wander what you'll do if you find out she also cheated in her 'weak moments'. Be a man, stick to your commitment and encourage others too. Don't give them a 'licence' to cheat. Oh how I wish r/ship was a perfect as u make it sound. IF U REALLY LOVE SOMEONE, YOU WON'T HURT D PERSON" yet we can't find a perfect relationship. Yet people who love each other hurt themselves and quarrel and make up. Face it, we are humans, we have our own selfish desires that must b fullfilled weather we love someone or not. That's why everybosy had secret. Secret is only a means to save our loved ones from being hurt. Just like the poster, she feels the loves but has seen the husbands secret and that's why she is hurt. She might have had a husband who does not cheat on her but might not love her as much as her present husband. Have u thought of this? And pls men can control their desires(I am still wondering if u read my post, guess u didn't) but some might need reason to and that's what I want our dear poster to do. She shuld give her husband reason to control his desire if he had not yet found one. don't people find reason to repent? Despite knowing sin is wrong? Who told u women cheat more? Are u for real? Especially in marriage? Pls lady, this is my job, don't tell me what I know. My girl Might also b cheatin on me, who knows? Bt honestly if I find out, I will belive that she did it either because she is a slut, a prostitute or has simply given her heart to another, either way I have lost her, because unlike me she is not capable of sleepin with another and nother have feelings for him(the other). |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by deniyor: 7:23pm On Sep 11, 2012 |
frank3.16: My exact issue with men cheating. When you cheat, it's a moment of weakness and you expect the lady to forgive you and move on. When she cheats, she is a slut, ashewo or has simply given her heart to another and it's all over. Why not consider the fact that it could have been a moment of weakness on her part too. It is this double standard that infuriates me about this issue. What makes you think you are better than her. What makes you think it's inky you or other men that are capable of cheating without emotions. What iif the only emotions she has towatdsnthe other guy is hate? Stop brushing all women with the same brush,. Like men, they are all different and capable of different emotional response. The simple reason i dint cheat is because I believe in young to others what i would like them to do to me too. |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by deniyor: 7:30pm On Sep 11, 2012 |
Ladies in thehouse that keep excusing or forgiving your errant partners cheating lifestyle, pls have some respect for yourselves. Don't stand for a cheating partner. Let him know from day 1 that if he cheats, you are walking out of the door. It's painful to walk out but do so. Your future lovers will know from your past you are not to be trifled with. If a man really loves you, and knows he will lose you by cheating, he is more likely to keep it in his pants. Don't letany man fool you by saying men can't control themselves. They can. Ladies, always remember this: A woman who stands for nothing will fall for anything. Stand up for yourselves. Stand up for your dignity and self respect. |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Adaeze003(f): 9:44pm On Sep 11, 2012 |
frank3.16:@bolded.. I'm officially disappointed. I mean if that's what love is about, I don't wanna be in luv. But fortunately it isn't. I hope you aint going into marriage with that mind set coz love is all about compromise, cutting out all bad habits and basically putting her need before yours. And uhm about the secret, you keep it a secret coz you knw its wrong and that's all cheating is. Deniyor has taken care of the $lut issue #thankGod. Summary : women should not be talked into accepting BS from men and uhm.. Cheating is wrong and should never be encouraged or excused. |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by frank317: 11:33pm On Sep 11, 2012 |
Adaeze003: |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by frank317: 11:36pm On Sep 11, 2012 |
Adaeze003: I only painted the reality of the world to u, deniyor only said what he wish the world would be like. Unfortunaytely nothing about marriage is a bed of roses, u have to be prepared for the good, the bad and the ugly. Yes I am with u on "cheating is wrong" and shuldnt b encouraged. @poster leave ur husband, he shuldnt cheat on u. Now I hope that settles it.or better still go cheat on ur husband too. I hope they will be there for u when they make u get angry and leave ur husband. I believe the next husband u will get won't cheat on u, even if he does get angry and leave him too. Thia is the type of advice u guys want to hear from b4 u accept that I believe cheating is wrong. SMH |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by Okontami: 1:08pm On Sep 12, 2012 |
The reputation of Pastor J. A. O. Akindele in the reverred Redeemed Christian Church of God (RCCG) is second only to the equally reverred and respected General Overseer of the church, Pastor Enoch Adeboye. Suffice to add that, Akindele through dedication to the work of God and overall growth of the RCCG brand, has risen to the number two position in the church hierarchy hence when Akindele talks everybody in the church sneezes except maybe Adeboye himself. For the ordinary folks in the RCCG, Pastor Akindele is more than a religious leader, not a few regarded him as second daddy. Of course the real daddy is the GO himself. However, the very high regard members of the church and other Christian denominations in the country hold Adeboye’s second in command seems to be heading to the gutters as The Premier can reveal that the hitherto respected man of God might have thread the path of sin which is currently threatening the foundation of the church with the largest congregation not only in Nigeria but also in the entire continent of Africa. The brethren in the church might not be aware of the scandal because the church leadership especially Daddy GO has done everything within its power to cover it up because as Daddy GO put it, “we should not put the reputation of the church in shame”. But the leaders of the church aware of the lingering scandal are keeping it very close to their chest. Like the Biblical Adam, Pastor Akindele recently tasted the forbidden fruit of an Eve in his office and the result was that the Eve has delivered a baby for the RCCG second in command. The daughter of Eve, according to report, has been private secretary of Pastor Akindele for six years but not many know that the major part of those years has been a sleazy but hot love affair between Daddy Deputy GO and his private secretary. For those who don’t know, Akindele is legally married to Deborah Olubunmi who is the first daughter of the founder of the church, Pastor Josiah Olufemi Akindayomi. The Premier learnt that the church in appreciation to the late founder for his pioneering efforts in sowing the seed that has so germinated brilliantly, ceded the number two position to the family hence when the first daughter, Deborah got married to Akindele, the number two position in the church was automatically bestowed on Akindele. Thus, the man was made the Assistant General Overseer, Administration/Personnel. The cat was left out of the bag in the sleazy love affair recently when senior church members noticed that the secretary was not on her seat as usual. “For about six weeks, she was not on seat and senior officials of the church started asking questions but Akindele was evasive on her whereabouts,” sources told The Premier. Serious investigation by the senior officials of the church revealed the unthinkable! The hitherto revered Akindele was having carnal knowledge of his private secretary and to make matters worse he had already put her in the family way. To avoid the prying eyes of members of the public especially senior members of the church, he relocated her to Ibadan and it was while the woman was nursing her pregnancy in Ibadan that her absence was noticed at the RCCG headquarters. It was senior officials who later reported their discovery to Daddy GO. Adeboye urged them to conceal the matter because it can destroy the church. However, The Premier investigation revealed that the Pastor has been punished by the leadership of the church but the nature of his punishment was not revealed. The incident has left a devastating effect on Deborah who felt betrayed by the man she trusted and loved ceded her family position to . Deborah reportedly developed high blood pressure which later led to her being hospitalized. Deborah’s state of health has been reported to be deteriorating with the report that her husband mistress has delivered of a baby for her husband. Akindele has grown through the ranks in the church having joined in 1962 as a church worker. He had served as a chorister, Sunday school teacher, private secretary to the late founder before being ordained full pastor in 1981. He has been National Treasurer and Secretary General of the National Elders’ Council of the church. He had worked in Edo and Ondo States for the church and was appointed Assistant General Overseer at the 1997 national convention of the church. |
| Re: When He Says Loves You And Still Cheats Is That True Love by sitasie(f): 1:10pm On Sep 12, 2012 |
cheating is such an act of high emotional intensity,remember, it ceases to be a pleasure wen it ceases to be a secret. its very possible for one to cheat on u en love u simultaneously. it starts with the psychology of the player, he myt cheat because of : 1.his/her poor self image/lack of self confidence or low self esteem. so wth the desperate need for attention to prove that u r still attractive to win more hearts, one is tempted to cheat so as to be reassured of his/her looks and his seductive game.in such a situation, the moment he wins a heart, he looses interest coz he's already assured. 2.comparing your patner's character traits with others e.g,if u are seeking interllectual stimulation and your partner is not providing it,u are likely to get attracted to someone who is brainy and fulfills your mental needs. finally,I am telling you this,no one person can fulfill all your needs, in the journey of life u will meet people who are far better than your partner. every time u meet one, you are likely to meet another who is better. there will always be temptations beckoning You towards themselves, but remember no one is perfect, not even you. |
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