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Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery - Family (4) - Nairaland

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Compilation Of The Funniest, Weirdest Reasons Nigerian Couples Divorce / Parents: What Is The Funniest Thing Your Child Has Ever Said To You Or Done? / How Did Your Husband React/cope During Labour? (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by Coldfeet(f): 8:47pm On Oct 22, 2012
ssainty:
d other 3 too(out of wedlock)?
No! Na swear?
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by harlos: 9:05pm On Oct 22, 2012
remmyton:

waste: a pack of trash shocked shocked shocked
i am sure you meant waist wink wink wink
at least u got the message cool
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by LadyAdorable: 9:06pm On Oct 22, 2012
remmyton:

waste: a pack of trash shocked shocked shocked
i am sure you meant waist wink wink wink
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by inkuz: 9:09pm On Oct 22, 2012
veery correct
Ariyke: Easier said than done bt wait are u male or female if male am nt surprised bt if female he go soon reach ur turn. undecided
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by controlseven: 9:43pm On Oct 22, 2012
bigblxd:

I was told of a Muslim woman dat was in labour wit excruciating pains for more than a day without sucess. Suddenly she started shouting Jesus, Jesus, Jesus but the nurse reminded her that she is muslim but she continued and replied dat all the women who came here since yesterday and shouted dat name has delivered and gone home leaving her behind. It didn't take longer than 10 minutes after then dat she was delivered of her baby. This is a true live story pls. Big UP for our women!
Da craziest post ever! Lol
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by controlseven: 9:53pm On Oct 22, 2012
Dropping babies off ma bowels aint no big deal. Always go to da damn room reading ma Hardley Chase novels...
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by safarigirl(f): 9:53pm On Oct 22, 2012
speeder:
so u dey where ur aunt dey born pikin. Wetin we no go hear for nija
you may not be aware, but hey do allow family into the labour room during delivery, considering the fact that she was staying with us during her pregnancy and her hubby wasn't present when she was taken to the hospital..
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by toygod2: 9:59pm On Oct 22, 2012
lol @ comments
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by Nobody: 10:00pm On Oct 22, 2012
safarigirl: I remember when my aunt was in labour the first time, her hubby was late and she said "Where is that useless man? He's the one that put me in this condition"

And when he got there and she was pushing, she cried out, "I will not do it again o, please, after this one, I will not do it again" and hubby laughed and replied, "No problem, we won't do it again"


=D ♒ђåª•ђåª•ђåª♒=D
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by Nobody: 10:02pm On Oct 22, 2012
control_seven: Dropping babies off ma bowels aint no big deal. Always go to da damn room reading ma Hardley Chase novels...

Na so...

 ˚°yimu!..
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by Nobody: 10:08pm On Oct 22, 2012
harlos: at least u got the message cool

I wonder oooooo.
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by Ariyke: 10:13pm On Oct 22, 2012
Toyosi R: When i was at the labour room. I taught i was about dying and remembered its better for a good muslim to say laa i laahaa illaa Allah as the last word. So i started shouting that after telling the nurse i want to pooo and she said i should poo where i am.
THE FUNNY THING I SAID WAS JUST THE SHOUTING OF NURSEEEEEE!!!! EJOOOO MO FE YAAA GBEEEE. JEDI JEDI NN SHE MIIII OOOOOOO
Madam u got me laughinggrin
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by controlseven: 10:40pm On Oct 22, 2012
bukfal:

Na so...

 ˚°yimu!..
I'm surrogate mama. Bring on da contract, i deliver without qualms!
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by othenok(f): 10:54pm On Oct 22, 2012
Ayee Idris:

2 weeks ke?? I laugh! I know your mind is made up so I am not trying to change your mind but remember CS is first and foremost a major stomach SURGERY. No one heals from a major surgery in 2 weeks. Being fit to move around for 2 weeks doesn't mean u are well o. Doctors won't even let u exercise until after 6 weeks. The stitches can get infected, the stomach takes much longer to return to shape, you can only have done 3 times, meaning NO more than 3 kids for you, yada yada yada. If u want to avoid pain, u can opt for epidural. Even if that has its own side effects, but then again, what doesn't?

Naaa! It depends. Had my first baby CS n d second vaginal and i tell ya, if i ever have to do it again it must be with C-Section. My second baby i was dumb founded at the kind of pain i was going through. Kept on yelling Hei! Hei! hei! Prayed Psalm 91 more than 10x. And the funny thing was that within that short interval of relief this very sweet sleep takes over and from d sweet sleep fiery pain would start again. Remeber when it was time to push i had become very sleepy and weak the matron gave me a very slap. Men! The tin no easy at all
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by Nobody: 12:47am On Oct 23, 2012
fellis:

Oh common, a year of pain?
The thing is variable, while some people might have pain that lasts for months, some others are good to go as from 2weeks.
Anyway, my mind is already made up so this point doesn't matter to me.

That is good advise u're being given there...Better listen....Av u ever had of...keloids from scars, scar pains, muscle pains and a whole lot of other shit that can occur from even simple surgery. Most doctors are even usually unwilling to carry out C sections except it's specially necessary. The natural way is still the most safe way and with no side effect. A word is enough for the wise. Few hours of pain and maximum of one week recovery compared to a lot of surgery complication that may occur. Surgery has a lot of associated risks.
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by EstherOkonkwo(f): 1:14am On Oct 23, 2012
Francheezy: s0 many threads ab0uT lab0ur,
.
.
.
.
Wetin dey aPPun seF
U won't understand till u experience it if u'll.
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by Nobody: 4:23am On Oct 23, 2012
12 inches!:


That is good advise u're being given there. Surgery has a lot of associated risks.
Thanks, but there are other reasons apart from pain that influenced that decision.
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by Kujo(m): 7:51am On Oct 23, 2012
women una dey try oooo
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by SmileGirl(f): 10:25am On Oct 23, 2012
hmmmm, haaaa, eh ehe ehe. Papa Ekine oooooo, come remove wat u kept in my stomach. Oh oh oh(mouth open wide) screams haaaaaa. I will not do it again. Turns to a nurse: help me please(weepin profusely) pls help me
Nurse: it's alright, u wil b fine. Sorry en sorry
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by bikay(f): 2:00pm On Oct 23, 2012
Lol! at some responses. But he no easy sha o. Kudos to our mothers.
I had my first child thru a C-section and this second one naturally. I'd built up my faith and prayed to God to give me the strength to pull thru. I had also read a lot about V-Bac, so i just believed in God and promised not to shed a tear bearing it in mind that hubby was not in town.
GOD proved HIS might that night. I was so prayerful thru out but it got to a point when the contractions proper started. WOW!!! I kept saying ''Nurse i want to sit up,no stand up sorry i want to lie down'' and she responded: Sorry you have to remain in this positon.
The pain was just something else. After some mins i just screamed out ''Nurse I want to POO POO'' she responded: Sorry Madam you are not fully dilated, i don't want you to tear your cervix. Such a patient lady, i can't count the no of times i pinched her arm while she rubbed my waist.
My bundle of joy was worth the pains as soon as I set my eyes on her. May our children continue to be a source of joy to the parents and a blessing for their generation(amen)

1 Like

Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by ZURYZEST(m): 2:15pm On Oct 23, 2012
mine just happened two days ago, my cousine wife was about to put to bed, the uterances coming out of her mouth was my cousine's name, crying yeh yeh yeh, hmmmmmmm, ahhhhhhh B B B B B B, OH I cant stand again, stop it, its not funny, haa mummy mummy mummy and the likes
grin grin grin grin grin grin cool cool cool cool
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by imurboss: 4:46pm On Oct 23, 2012
@Topic, for all I can remember I was shouting and screaming so much that they have to remove the other person from the ward.Then I remembered begging the doc to stop the drip for just 5mins so I could at least rest a bit but he refused then I shouted'God where are you Ooo why have u abandoned me ooo' and before you know it I started speaking in various tongues.....Bah Bah Bah Yha yha yha.I never knew I could speak in tongues until that day,Lol!! though it wasn't really a funny experience.
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by harlos: 6:42pm On Oct 23, 2012
Me dey carry yansh for mama o
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by bigfrancis21: 1:04am On Oct 27, 2012
fellis: Good God.
I am doing C-section. Natural birth is not by force.
Hahahahaha!
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by tpia5: 2:59am On Oct 27, 2012
why does the poster need to know?

such info is not used well in juju contexts.
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by Nobody: 9:45am On Oct 27, 2012
i heard abt a lady who chased her husband in the hospital, butt naked, screaming, im going to kill u for this.
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by jiljosh(m): 2:06am On Jan 10, 2013
Sadly many a woman use evil words freely at this period. Words are powerful and remain effective long after the delivery has come and gone. Im certain many destinies have been truncated by mothers' careless words.
Re: Funniest Thing You Said During Labour And Delivery by smartmom(f): 9:51am On Jan 14, 2013
After my 1st delivery, I developed an extra healthy respect for my mom. She became dearer to me. The pain was actually too much to utter any intelligible word. Just grooooaaaned and prayed in tongues. Fortunately it was just 1 hour of labour. The remaining 3 kids were a breeze, supernatural painfree delivery(note not labour) I am SERIOUS too!

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