Hi all,

I don't know how to start putting a situation that as been bothering me together, but kindly try to understand my situation. I have been in relationships and barely a year into any, it crashes. Reason for this is that I get to fine out that my partners (one at a time) has been double dating me. I try to make amendment, but the trust dies even though I still respect them. I have had about four relationships now and all seem to be the same. I am currently in another relationship and I have strong faith that it will work but the issue again is on my partner. Due to her experiences with her relationships, she finds it had to trust even though she really loves me. I know trust is earned with time but she feels I cheat on her.
I know it’s difficult to believe that a man can stick all is feeling to one woman but that is the painful truth about me. She has hot temper and easily says things that provoke a lot. I try my best to keep her temper mild but sometimes it just goes too bad. She complains about my quietness (because I don't talk much but ask questions)

I really need advise because I have committed myself and ready to get married to her. What can I do to make her understand that she is the only woman in my life?
I adore and respect her but can she really do the things she says?

We are from two different tribes and this bothers her a lot especially when I speak my language on phone with anybody (but worst when it’s a female). I know I lied once about a girl (from my tribe) my mum wanted me to settle with, which I knew it will never be because I didn't have any feeling for her and my mum understands my stand. I told her (my fiancée) my stories and apologized to her (my fiancée) when she saw a text message from the same girl on my phone (she sent the text after telling her the truth that am in a very serious relationship). I give my fiancée access to my phone and hold no secret from her. We don’t leave in the same location but we see each other at least every two weeks interval. Above all she is such a nice and caring person.

Please someone tell me how should I tackle this situation because I don’t want to lose her or go into another relationship. Is it a crime to be open and honest in a relationship?

[/size][size=8pt][/size][size=8pt][size=8pt][/size]

If truely your want advise and ready to take it - I advise you to seek the face of GOD and tell your partner the same. Tell God you and your partner have sinned against him by not respecting/keeping his commandments. Then after this - Put your trust in GOD and HE shall surely direct your paths and works - IF ONLY YOU KEEP HIS WORDS/COMMANDMENTS. HE WILL TAKE YOU AWAY FROM CONFUSION AND EARTHLY FEELING AND GIVE YOU WISDOM AND UNDERSTANDING. YO DON'T MARRY OR CHOOSE WIFE BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU FEEL FOR HER/HIM - BUT BY THE WISDOM AND UNDERSTANDING FROM GOD. Because what you feel will surely die one day - either by her attitude or otherwise. but GOD's WISDOM AND UNDERSTANDING IS FOREVER. YOU'LL FOREVER LEAVE IN JOY, PEACE IN YOUR MARRIAGE.

No it is not a crime to be open and honest in relationship. The way I see your fiancee is jealous spirit to feel you betrayed her trust because of that girl from your tribe you spoke on the phone.

Why you keep that girl from your tribe on your phone list (your blackbook) IN THE FIRST PLACE if you are seriously committed to your fiancee to get married later? To me, you might be a player behind your fiancee back to cheat on her go back to this girl from your tribe. This is how your fiancee feel to think that way!!!!

My brother, when it comes to courtship it requires absolute patience and tolerance as well as perserverance. A lot of people always miss the link because they underates the issue. First of all, seek the face of the Almighty God by asking for forgiveness likewise for HIS strength and direction. Bear in mind that not every friendship or courtship that must end up in marriage, try and study each other whether you are really meant for each other. I wish you the best of luck in all your endeavours.

Encomium:

My brother, when it comes to courtship it requires absolute patience and tolerance as well as perserverance. A lot of people always miss the link because they underates the issue. First of all, seek the face of the Almighty God by asking for forgiveness likewise for HIS strength and direction. Bear in mind that not every friendship or courtship that must end up in marriage, try and study each other whether you are really meant for each other. I wish you the best of luck in all your endeavours.

Check out existing thread to help you at below:

10 Insights You should take steps into serious relationship before you get marry her/him
https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-95533.0.html

Pally, if you want serious advise, take atleast 6 months break off the relationship to sort yourself out,

Haha, i guessed your dead scared now, she don jazz you finish

On a more serious note, how you cheat on a gurl and expect to get away with it? Wake up g

Though still a greenhorn, but I feel you guys are not compatible a bit - a vociferous and hot-tempered woman and a quiet fellow, una no match at all. Advice is seek someone else, there are lot of fishes in the ocean.

^Agree with the guy up there

Guy dont make mistake! That type of woman and a quiet guy, It will be fun in the beginning because it seems like she is handling things and leading you(fun sometimes for a guy ) and the huge difference in your personality also makes it even more intense at first but to marry someone like that? You gonna end up being bullied the rest of your life,

.

propose and get married to her. If the answer is no, then move on