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Warning To Nigerian Girls. - Romance - Nairaland

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Dependent Attitude Of Nigerian Girls In Relationships: Poverty Or Greed? / Warning Signs That Your Girl Doesn't Love You Anymore. / Nigerian Girls In The U.S. Are Lonely (2) (3) (4)

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Warning To Nigerian Girls. by mekaboy(m): 1:18am On May 30, 2013
I know girls these days now now get their definition of who a real man is from American movies. All talking about 9 ways to make a girl fall inlove with you and stuff like that. Talking about perfumes, house, shoes,a lot of material stuff.

But what I want to warn the girls about today, is about the economic situation in Nigeria today. There is a lot of hardship and Frustration, which most guys are bottling up inside.

Don't bring a lot of these western movie drama into your african relationships. You might not survive if a guy downloads his frustration on you.

I read a lot of stuff on scaring relationship accidents that occur these days. Guys killing gf and stuff like that.

These kind of stuff don't use to happen years back. I guess it grows with the economic situation. So instead of mounting pressure or trying to mold a guy into the guys you see on western movies.

Try and understand that this is Nigeria, and there is a difference between the movies and reality.

1 Like

Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Sanboy25: 1:56am On May 30, 2013

I understand what you're trying to say,
but the men also want a woman like those that they see in the same American movies.
Same there, the economic situation pushes women to think of their material needs first
and they don't have time for 'real love' like what the American movies shows thus as what Nigerian men want.
Both men and women are at fault in this case.... undecided
Sad...

1 Like

Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by mekaboy(m): 2:41am On May 30, 2013
Sanboy25:
I understand what you're trying to say,
but the men also want a woman like those that they see in the same American movies.
Same there, the economic situation pushes women to think of their material needs first
and they don't have time for 'real love' like what the American movies shows thus as what Nigerian men want.
Both men and women are at fault in this case.... undecided
Sad...

Most times, it is the guy that has to do something to impress the girl. And when that thing he has to do to impress becomes so material and stuff she sees in the movie it becomes bad.

It did not start today, Adam was doing just fine in the garden until Eve started becoming demanding, asking him to do stuff she leaned from another world.kind of how relationships where doing in Nigeria before MTV Base Chaneel O, Series, Celeb gossip etc.
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by 190: 3:03am On May 30, 2013
Nigerian girls lipsrsealed lipsrsealed lipsrsealed lipsrsealed lipsrsealed
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Mynd44: 5:39am On May 30, 2013
OP needs to stop hanging with broke and childish ladies. Of course it is good to say but a lot of men cannot hold their own so they try to impress the girls thinking that will help them get them....

1 Like

Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by AtheistD(m): 9:13am On May 30, 2013
Sanboy25:
I understand what you're trying to say,
but the men also want a woman like those that they see in the same American movies.
Same there, the economic situation pushes women to think of their material needs first
and they don't have time for 'real love' like what the American movies shows thus as what Nigerian men want.
Both men and women are at fault in this case.... undecided
Sad...

No they dont. Nigerian men want a traditional woman. How many modern Nigerian women would want to be traditional housewives? I can count the number on 1 hand tongue

The only thing we want from the West are women who believe in free se.x and arent frigid with the se.x for goodies philosophy. Se.x is not a currency or a barter method and western women dont believe in stuff like that.
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Mynd44: 9:39am On May 30, 2013
Nigerian men? Speak for yourself dude
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by AtheistD(m): 9:45am On May 30, 2013
Mynd_44: Nigerian men? Speak for yourself dude

A majority of them do want that. trust me... they do wink

The independent woman is not ncecessarily a trait they want. smiley
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Sanboy25: 10:00am On May 30, 2013
Atheist:-D:
No they dont. Nigerian men want a traditional woman. How many modern Nigerian women would want to be traditional housewives? I can count the number on 1 hand tongue
The only thing we want from the West are women who believe in free se.x and arent frigid with the se.x for goodies philosophy. Se.x is not a currency or a barter method and western women dont believe in stuff like that.
[b]
I suppose that you're in the West to say these kind of things.
Why would Nigerian women believe in free s/e/x if Nigerian men don't.
Each time a man has the kitty-cat for free, he brags to his friends and even come on this website to do so,
he presents it as something that is valued and that his malice took advantage of for free.
I've seen it numerous times.
Women in the West don't have the same traditional values as the local women when it comes to s/e/x.
Nigeria is still closed up on this matter compared to them.
Can you bring your girlfriends (not wife) at home (to your parents) to sleep overnight ?
Can a girl tell her father that she has a boyfriend that she don't intend to marry and that she is s/e/xually active ?
Also the economic situation in Naija is not the same than in the West, people (and women yes) are more concerned about making money or getting 'things' than considering s/e/x as some philosophical part of life.
I can't blame women for not giving up the cat for free.
[/b]
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by AtheistD(m): 10:15am On May 30, 2013
Sanboy25:
I suppose that you're in the West to say these kind of things.

I am in the West. The UK to be precise... London.

Sanboy25:
Why would Nigerian women believe in free s/e/x if Nigerian men don't.
Each time a man has the kitty-cat for free, he brags to his friends and even come on this website to do so,
he presents it as something that is valued and that his malice took advantage of for free.
I've seen it numerous times.
Women in the West don't have the same traditional values as the local women when it comes to s/e/x.
Nigeria is still closed up on this matter compared to them.

Are our Nig girls doing any better? Go on facebook, 2go and whatsapp and see what they all get up to. They just only do it where there is some sort of financial reward. And There are loads of Nig guys who like free se.x. It can only add more spice to a relationship. Virgin issue aside of course wink (which is all hypocrisy anyway because they still cheat on the virgins with experienced women)

Sanboy25:
Can you bring your girlfriends (not wife) at home (to your parents) to sleep overnight ?
Can a girl tell her father that she has a boyfriend that she don't intend to marry and that she is s/e/xually active ?

Why not? I did. And they all got along well. Though I regret it now grin

Even though a girl cannot tell her father it doesnt stop most of them from doing it anyway. They all have se.x they just dont do it for free. The only innocent parties are the virgins. but a virgin is a virgin right. They arent sleeping with anyone.

Sanboy25:
Also the economic situation in Naija is not the same than in the West, people (and women yes) are more concerned about making money or getting 'things' than considering s/e/x as some philosophical part of life.
I can't blame women for not giving up the cat for free.

The point above is agreeable. Most women in financial difficulty are sort of strong armed into doing things they might not be proud of. We all understand that. No one can blame them. I just feel it is right to call a spade a spade.

So what about these 2 scenarios:

1. A girl sleeps with 50 men, each pay her amounts of money, support her financially through school and get her a job, she is now a career high flier.

2. A girl works hard to put herself through school and gets a job through determined hard work. She has lots of fun partying and sleeps with 50 men for pleasure and gratification.

Out of the two, which is the lesser evil? Gratification or necessity? smiley
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Sanboy25: 10:25am On May 30, 2013
Atheist:-D:
I am in the West. The UK to be precise... London.
Are our Nig girls doing any better? Go on facebook, 2go and whatsapp and see what they all get up to. They just only do it where there is some sort of financial reward. And There are loads of Nig guys who like free se.x. It can only add more spice to a relationship. Virgin issue aside of course wink (which is all hypocrisy anyway because they still cheat on the virgins with experienced women)
Why not? I did. And they all got along well. Though I regret it now grin
Even though a girl cannot tell her father it doesnt stop most of them from doing it anyway. They all have se.x they just dont do it for free. The only innocent parties are the virgins. but a virgin is a virgin right. They arent sleeping with anyone.
The point above is agreeable. Most women in financial difficulty are sort of strong armed into doing things they might not be proud of. We all understand that. No one can blame them. I just feel it is right to call a spade a spade.
So what about these 2 scenarios:
1. A girl sleeps with 50 men, each pay her amounts of money, support her financially through school and get her a job, she is now a career high flier.
2. A girl works hard to put herself through school and gets a job through determined hard work. She has lots of fun partying and sleeps with 50 men for pleasure and gratification.
Out of the two, which is the lesser evil? Gratification or necessity? smiley

We're just putting back the blame on each gender, it's a vicious circle...
I believe that if there must be a change, it must come from the men.
Because it's men who makes the world go round (sad to say...)
I don't find anything wrong with your two scenarios:
'The end justifies the means' as they say.
AS long as they consider s/e/x as something extremely valued that they should not have for free,
women will continue charging them in/directly. smiley
Good morning to you too. smiley
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by AtheistD(m): 10:38am On May 30, 2013
Sanboy25:

We're just putting back the blame on each gender, it's a vicious circle...
I believe that if there must be a change, it must come from the men.
Because it's men who makes the world go round (sad to say...)
I don't find anything wrong with your two scenarios:
'The end justifies the means' as they say.
AS long as they consider s/e/x as something extremely valued that they should not have for free,
women will continue charging them in/directly. smiley
Good morning to you too. smiley

tSure, sure. I agree grin but Take a look at pros.titution, in Aberdeen, they brought in laws to hit the male customers hard with the intention that it would reduce pros.titution and hence eradicate it (or reduce it thoroughly). All it did was force the pros out of the red light district and into the clubs and bars... and even Union street shocked. The reality on ground is that at least both parties must be willing to change.

But this is really more about women than men. Women in Nig view se.x differently to how men view it. A lot of women can easily marry a man that does not fulfil a role in bed adequately. What does that say long term about the marriage?
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Sanboy25: 10:53am On May 30, 2013

As long as there will have a demand, it will have an offer.
If they didn't have customers, they would find another 'occupation'...
Yes both parties must want to change,
but I believe that it's men who set the rules in this relationship thing.
They must try to change their women that's it.
A lot of men also marry women that are not good in bed e.g vir/gins...
S/e/x is not the only thing in marriage for both men and women.
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by mekaboy(m): 10:54am On May 30, 2013
Mynd_44: OP needs to stop hanging with broke and childish ladies. Of course it is good to say but a lot of men cannot hold their own so they try to impress the girls thinking that will help them get them....

That is the problem, u say stop banging with broke and childish ladies like Nigeria is full of "YOUNG" Rich and matured ladies . A guy that sets his mind to only date the. " Rich and Mature " lady as you say seems like a gold digger to me. Since the landies financial status is his primary concern.

You know that before a lady actually becomes rich in Nigerias system she probably be in her late 30s.

This is a country where a girl gets a job and takes up the responsibility of her parents. Paying school fees, her own house rent and that of parents.

So even though she is working and manages to get a car on a payment plan she still carrying the burden of the family on her shoulders. And while that lady is still young, she will still be looking for a man who will help with the burden. If she get married then, atleast she might stop paying her own house rent and use that money to help family.

If she is not married and carry the burden, before she is frEe, will be probly when other family members get jobs to support.

So when u talk about Rich and mature, are you relating to sugar mummy? Because I know there are a very few rich and mature young ladies in Nigeria.


And when you find a rich young girl, most times, their might be a sugar daddy providing the luxury. So the young girls, don't actually understand the Nigerian situation and copy western ideology of a real man.but they don't copy everything because of the situation. They copy the part of the nice charming guy with nice car and stuff, taking the girl to fancy resturants and giving gifts.

But the leave the parts where young lady is schooling and working in a canteen or mall. They skip the parts where the girl is paying her own bills, because they assume all these things are not applicable in Nigeria. When those who have graduated for years don't have jobs,is it students that will have part time jobs?

And even if they manage to get the job, the money should be used for helping herself and family.

Now if they are smart enough to skip the parts of the movies, where the girl works or acquires some skill to earn money and take care of themselves. Why don't they cut the expectation of fancy cars, taking out, human hair etc. Considering the economic situation, or are they in a different Nigeria from the guys?
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by AtheistD(m): 11:02am On May 30, 2013
Sanboy25:
As long as there will have a demand, it will have an offer.
If they didn't have customers, they would find another 'occupation'...
Yes both parties must want to change,
but I believe that it's men who set the rules in this relationship thing.
They must try to change their women that's it.
A lot of men also marry women that are not good in bed e.g vir/gins...
S/e/x is not the only thing in marriage for both men and women.

It is all the mens fault grin

Men are only part of the problem. But let us not argue on the topic.
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Sanboy25: 11:06am On May 30, 2013
Atheist:-D:
It is all the mens fault grin
Men are only part of the problem. But let us not argue on the topic.

I didn't mean to put all the blame on men.
But if they are ruling the world, they are also the sources of the problems in the system... (and the remedy too).
Hum ok, peace. smiley
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by AtheistD(m): 11:21am On May 30, 2013
Sanboy25:

I didn't mean to put all the blame on men.
But if they are ruling the world, they are also the sources of the problems in the system... (and the remedy too).
Hum ok, peace. smiley

Remedy? Men? I doubt it. Unless they stop wanting nookie then maybe tongue
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Sanboy25: 11:23am On May 30, 2013
Atheist:-D:
Remedy? Men? I doubt it. Unless they stop wanting nookie then maybe tongue

Hahaha, you should have faith in mankind. grin
Men can't create problem and expect women to solve them...
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by AtheistD(m): 11:26am On May 30, 2013
Sanboy25:

Hahaha, you should have faith in mankind. grin
Men can't create problem and expect women to solve them...

We didnt create the problem. How did men create the problem? sad It was women who wanted the good things in life and didnt want to work hard for it. Men always want nookie, why do they get it by barter now when it was not always so?

Oh yeah. And maybe poverty has escalated it.
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Sanboy25: 11:32am On May 30, 2013
Atheist:-D:
We didnt create the problem. How did men create the problem? sad It was women who wanted the good things in life and didnt want to work hard for it. Men always want nookie, why do they get it by barter now when it was not always so?
Oh yeah. And maybe poverty has escalated it.

When women works hard to get things, you guys are insecure and don't want to marry them.
Then open threads like: 'The consequences of Women leaving the kitchen'
Here is the adress: https://www.nairaland.com/1301657/consequences-women-leaving-kitchen
Let's not turn this into a man vs. woman threads, it's pointless.
'Peace be with you.' smiley
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by AtheistD(m): 11:35am On May 30, 2013
Sanboy25:

When women works hard to get things, you guys are insecure and don't want to marry them.
Then open threads like: 'The consequences of Women leaving the kitchen'
Here is the adress: https://www.nairaland.com/1301657/consequences-women-leaving-kitchen
Let's not turn this into a man vs. woman threads, it's pointless.
'Peace be with you.' smiley

The bitter irony. I myself have indulged in such foolishness shocked

But a traditional woman is not my preference. I know a lot of guys want that. And also, why must a woman look at only 2 alternatives, either he is rich and loaded or she is rich and loaded. Why cant they both work together to get there?
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Sanboy25: 11:41am On May 30, 2013
Atheist:-D:
The bitter irony. I myself have indulged in such foolishness shocked
But a traditional woman is not my preference. I know a lot of guys want that. And also, why must a woman look at only 2 alternatives, either he is rich and loaded or she is rich and loaded. Why cant they both work together to get there?

I also want both me and my man (when he comes) to work together, there is no ambiguity on this point. smiley
I also don't know why most women put themselves in this situation... undecided
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by AtheistD(m): 11:43am On May 30, 2013
Sanboy25:

I also want both me and my man (when he comes) to work together, there is no ambiguity on this point. smiley
I also don't know why most women put themselves in this situation... undecided

Precisely. Women can work through it. Not all but a lot can. It is the wealth factor in the country creating problems for both.
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Sanboy25: 11:48am On May 30, 2013
Atheist:-D:
Precisely. Women can work through it. Not all but a lot can. It is the wealth factor in the country creating problems for both.

So the solution is that women should work hard but not too much in order to not scare away men,
she must give the kitty-cat for free,
then wait to get married to earn big but not more than her man, to not hurt his ego... That's it ?
Poor women, we have it difficult in this world... undecided
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by AtheistD(m): 11:54am On May 30, 2013
Sanboy25:

So the solution is that women should work hard but not too much in order to not scare away men,
she must give the kitty-cat for free,
then wait to get married to earn big but not more than her man, to not hurt his ego... That's it ?
Poor women, we have it difficult in this world... undecided

Take it easy babes. I didnt say that undecided

Women can earn more than men. Women can earn nothing. Earnings is subjective to the man they want. The kitty kat should be free or they are pros. Women should try to target men with more in mind than financial benefits. Women would be advised to try and make something of themselves, career, education, general development. Also, there are character traits that can aid. Also, love plays a role wink cheesy

But the woman decides because, they are the ones who choose their man. So they should decide what they want.
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Sanboy25: 12:04pm On May 30, 2013
Atheist:-D:

Take it easy babes. I didnt say that undecided
Women can earn more than men. Women can earn nothing. Earnings is subjective to the man they want. The kitty kat should be free or they are pros. Women should try to target men with more in mind than financial benefits. Women would be advised to try and make something of themselves, career, education, general development. Also, there are character traits that can aid. Also, love plays a role wink cheesy
But the woman decides because, they are the ones who choose their man. So they should decide what they want.

Hum, but when the kitty-cat is given for free how do you not want us to feel 'used'.
Pros at least have an earning, if they don't charge men, they'll fall in the category of
's/l/u/t/s' ; 'easy girl' ; 'w/h/o/r/e/s' and all these names that society likes to give them.
Trust me, pros are more respected than these ones...
I believe that it's the men who chooses the women, as they does the chasing, the courtship and it's men that set the pace in a relationship... women are more passive (I think).
You're a real advocate for love it seems wink
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by AtheistD(m): 12:08pm On May 30, 2013
Sanboy25:

Hum, but when the kitty-cat is given for free how do you not want us to feel 'used'.
Pros at least have an earning, if they don't charge men, they'll fall in the category of
's/l/u/t/s' ; 'easy girl' ; 'w/h/o/r/e/s' and all these names that society likes to give them.
Trust me, pros are more respected than these ones...
I believe that it's the men who chooses the women, as they does the chasing, the courtship and it's men that set the pace in a relationship... women are more passive (I think).
You're a real advocate for love it seems wink

Ok. Used? How can a woman be "used" in such an act. Did she not enjoy it? It is a God given duty to enjoy intimacy. If she didnt enjoy it then she needs to address that. If she enjoy it then it is a "all win" situation. Both win wink

Sluts and easy girls are still better than pros. A LovePeddler is a pro. Also, who mentioned many partners. have one partner and enjoy intimacy with them. Why does it have to be many?

A girl sleeps with 100 men once each and another girl sleeps with 1 dude 100 times... which is considered cheap and easy? Also, who is most likely to enjoy themselves (that last question might be subjective).
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Sanboy25: 12:19pm On May 30, 2013
Atheist:-D:
Ok. Used? How can a woman be "used" in such an act. Did she not enjoy it? It is a God given duty to enjoy intimacy. If she didnt enjoy it then she needs to address that. If she enjoy it then it is a "all win" situation. Both win wink

Hahaha, I concede that I didn't take in account the 'enjoyment' part. grin


Atheist:-D:
Sluts and easy girls are still better than pros. A LovePeddler is a pro.

Do you believe that. It's your opinion, I respect it.
I have more respect for professional than for non-professional... (Maybe I'm twisted ? )

Atheist:-D:
Also, who mentioned many partners. have one partner and enjoy intimacy with them. Why does it have to be many?

Most of the men who enjoy intimacy for women doesn't marry them after...
Some men promise marriage but doesn't back up their chat after the act...


Atheist:-D:
A girl sleeps with 100 men once each and another girl sleeps with 1 dude 100 times... which is considered cheap and easy? Also, who is most likely to enjoy themselves (that last question might be subjective).

I can't answer for the 'enjoyment' part, but I do share you opinion on the last part. smiley
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by AtheistD(m): 12:34pm On May 30, 2013
Sanboy25:

Hahaha, I concede that I didn't take in account the 'enjoyment' part. grin

The enjoyment is nearly the best part wink

Sanboy25:

Do you believe that. It's your opinion, I respect it.
I have more respect for professional than for non-professional... (Maybe I'm twisted ? )

A pro is a lady who gives intimacy for favours, finance, car, food, goods, clothes, and similar things. A slut or easy girls are those that give intimacy for the fun and enjoyment in the bedroom (or sometimes for emotional reasons) but have slept with a lot of men and are easy to get into bed. Which is better? smiley

Sanboy25:

Most of the men who enjoy intimacy for women doesn't marry them after...
Some men promise marriage but doesn't back up their chat after the act...

That depends on how the women hndled themselves. So what if the men didnt marry them. Did they promise marriage? If so, why? Why didnt the women wait until they were married before intimacy? It can be a tough world but many a man has been dumped too for similar reasons. No gender is innocent in this regard.

Sanboy25:

I can't answer for the 'enjoyment' part, but I do share you opinion on the last part. smiley

Ok. So that girl with her 1 guy that did it 100 times is still preferrable to the other. So then there is no reason why intimacy cant be enjoyed with one partner.
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Sanboy25: 12:46pm On May 30, 2013
Atheist:-D:
The enjoyment is nearly the best part wink

Nearly ? Isn't it the best one ?
I can't tell, I am yet to be intimate with anyone. smiley

Atheist:-D:
A pro is a lady who gives intimacy for favours, finance, car, food, goods, clothes, and similar things. A slut or easy girls are those that give intimacy for the fun and enjoyment in the bedroom (or sometimes for emotional reasons) but have slept with a lot of men and are easy to get into bed. Which is better? smiley

Yes, I maintain that the Pro is better than the 'easy one'. They can also enjoy the intimacy with 'clients'...
Because pro gain something in the process, both of them are 's/l/u/t/s' anyway, so why would you choose to be broke on top of it ? Hahaha grin

Atheist:-D:
That depends on how the women hndled themselves. So what if the men didnt marry them. Did they promise marriage? If so, why? Why didnt the women wait until they were married before intimacy? It can be a tough world but many a man has been dumped too for similar reasons. No gender is innocent in this regard.

That's why I am waiting for marriage to give it up, I can't trust 'boyfriends'.

Atheist:-D:
Ok. So that girl with her 1 guy that did it 100 times is still preferrable to the other. So then there is no reason why intimacy cant be enjoyed with one partner.

I don't believe that I said otherwise, can you point/quote where I did ? smiley
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by AtheistD(m): 12:56pm On May 30, 2013
Sanboy25:

Nearly ? Isn't it the best one ?
I can't tell, I am yet to be intimate with anyone. smiley

it can be, dependent on the experience and capabilites of both partners. bear in mind a man will most likely enjoy it more than a woman would. For a woman to enjoy the man has to be very selfless and make effort. This is why you get a lot of women unsatisfied in relationships and marriage.

So you are a v... good for you wink I hope you are prepared for the wedding day tongue
https://www.nairaland.com/1307569/first-time-painful-sex-too

grin

Sanboy25:

Yes, I maintain that the Pro is better than the 'easy one'. They can also enjoy the intimacy with 'clients'...
Because pro gain something in the process, both of them are 's/l/u/t/s' anyway, so why would you choose to be broke on top of it ? Hahaha grin

Intimacy is intimacy. What if the girl decided to sleep with one man and decided to charge him anytime they did it. Would it make him love and respect her anymore. Better to be cheap than a pro.

Sanboy25:

That's why I am waiting for marriage to give it up, I can't trust 'boyfriends'.

Sure. I guess if you are determined. Good luck. smiley

Sanboy25:

I don't believe that I said otherwise, can you point/quote where I did ? smiley

I am completing my statement, that a lady doesnt need to be with lots of partners to have good intimacy.
Re: Warning To Nigerian Girls. by Sanboy25: 1:07pm On May 30, 2013
Atheist:-D:
Better to be cheap than a pro.

I am completing my statement, that a lady doesnt need to be with lots of partners to have good intimacy.

So you rather a woman that gives the kitty-cat easily to be broke than to be wealthy by doing the same thing...
It's your opinion and I respect it. smiley

I did never disagree with you for the second part. smiley

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