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12 Honest Reasons Why Some Women Are Still Single - Romance - Nairaland

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12 Honest Reasons Why Some Women Are Still Single by silica(m): 4:31pm On Jun 11, 2013
12 Honest Reasons Why Some Women Are Still Single - Warning, Very Brutally Honest

by Afro legend

1. Cause You Act Like A B**CH!!! – Yeah I said it, and what! Now I’m not trying to use that term in a general and disrespectful way. I am using it in a very specific and factual way. You have so many women that walk around with this nasty, stuck up attitude and they have the nerve to wonder why they struggle with finding the right man. Some of them have the audacity to cover it up by proclaiming to be a “diva”, too “classy”, or that they are just speaking their mind. In reality you just act like a b**ch. Some people might say, well I see plenty of women like that married or in relationships. Don’t be fooled, she wasn’t completely showing that side in the beginning, why? Because she is a smart b**ch : ). Either way, being a negative person isn’t going to help you find love. Most of the men may still go after you for séx, but if you learn to fix that attitude then you will start to attract the right kind of man in your life.

2. You Blame Men For Everything – That is why your ass is still single. You refuse to make yourself accountable for your actions. Everything is a man’s fault, and according to you, once they “act right” then you will have no problem falling in line. First off, I agree that men have contributed so much to the issues in relationships and women in general. We as men do have a responsibility to step up and do better. The thing is, if you aren’t willing to “step up” as well, then we will continue to have an issue, and you will continue to find yourself by yourself. At the end of the day, you control how you handle things. If you are not prepared to look in the mirror then you will never realize the flaws you have and that need improvement. So next time you want to put it all on men, check yourself, and accept that you have a choice to do better and truly be one of the “good women” out there.

3. You Think Your Looks Will Carry You Through Life – Ok so you’re beautiful and have a nice body, great! Problem is, if a man talks to you and finds out that there is nothing else to you then why would he bother wanting to make you his woman. He will still want séx (séx is always an option for men) but that’s it. Men may be more superficial than women, but most of us still want a woman who has some kind of personality. Make yourself a more well-rounded fun individual and more men will want to make you their own.

4. You Are A Gold Digger – ok maybe you aren’t exactly on that level, but you have made how much he makes your top priority. You are so caught up in dollar signs that you overlook the things that are truly important to having and maintaining a relationship. Realize that most men are not rich, so right there you immediately make it harder for yourself to find the right guy. Even if a guy has money, if he sees that’s what you are mainly about he won’t take you seriously. I’m not saying date broke men, but I am saying that money should not be your main motivator. Have better priorities and you will find yourself in better relationships.

5. You Don’t Keep Yourself Up – not that you have to get your nails and hair done every 2 weeks (though some of us do like that) but you can’t always look raggedy either. I mean damn, some of you ladies just put no real effort into how you look. Not everyone has the same style, but good hygiene and health should be a goal for all. Most of us want our woman to look good. As I stated earlier we men are a bit more superficial than women, so to grab and keep our attention you need to be mindful of how you present yourself. You know where you can improve your look, so get started on it if you want to increase your chances of going from being one of the single “good women” to one of the taken “good women”.

6. Your Séx Is Weak! – I personally believe it is best to wait but the reality is that most of us have or will engage in séx before we are married. As a woman if you chose to do that, then understand that your “skills” or lack thereof will impact a man’s willingness to make you his woman. Unfortunately a lot of women think they are good but really the experience was nothing to talk about. Women are quick to talk about a man’s performance while neglecting the fact that they could use a lot of improvement as well. It doesn’t take as much to please most men séxually, so be more open to ways you can improve if you choose to take that route.

7. You’ve been Hurt – many single women reading this remain single or in dead-end relationships because you have been hurt in your past. This hurt can be from a previous relationship, previous situation with a man, or séxual abuse. Some of the first six reasons I listed are just manifestations of that same hurt you are holding on to. You now operate with walls up to protect you, but it is those same walls that continue to block the blessings you deserve to receive. I understand how difficult it can be to move on from these things, but if you are ever to move in the right direction as well as into a new healthy relationship, you must begin with forgiveness. Start the process of letting the pain go and watch how things improve.

8. You keep entertaining the “wrong guy” – you know he isn’t the one for you yet you continue to entertain this man and his nonsense. He isn’t even giving you a full commitment but yet you are giving him all the benefits of a real relationship. How do you expect to ever find the “right guy” when you ALLOW yourself to continuously deal with the “wrong guy”? You want a relationship, but you let this (single or taken) man continue to take from you without having to fully give you what you desire in return. You can continue to sell yourself short, but do not complain or be surprised when you find yourself still single and more emotionally damaged than you were before.

9. Your too busy enjoying the “Single Life” – you’re just having too much fun living it up. Maybe you like to come and go as you please. Maybe you enjoy the free meals, outings, and for some, the bills that get paid from your “guy friends”. If those are your reasons, I get it, but just make sure that you aren’t using that as a front. Many women claim to love the “single life” but in a heartbeat they would trade it in for a genuine relationship. Yes, you should enjoy yourself while you’re single, but that does not mean you have to act like you enjoy being single. I hope you understand the difference. If your attitude or words say “I love being single” then understand that this will impact a man’s willingness to come at you with something more serious. Have fun, but be true to yourself and what you really desire.

10. You lack “positive energy”– this is different from #1 on the list “acting like a b**ch”. Some of you may not be negative or mean, but you still don’t give off any positive energy. If you were a light bulb, you would be a flickering light at best. Some of this is due to lack of self-esteem, unresolved issues that have sapped your strength, or just taking on too much to the point where you are beat down and worn out. Whatever the reason is, that inability to “shine bright” makes it hard for a man to be drawn to you. Whether we show it or not, we have enough issues as it is. So if you don’t seem like a source of enjoyment, or just come off as a big bag of issues. We won’t be so willing to be with you. We all have things we need to deal with, but make sure you exude some confidence and positive vibes to increase your chances of finding the right guy.

11. You haven’t met “that guy” – shout out to the ladies that don’t settle. Shout out to the ladies that understand that if he isn’t the right guy for you, then forcing a relationship is pointless. I applaud you and I hope more women would take that path. The reality is, just because you meet a “good guy” that doesn’t mean he is the “right guy”. Continue to be patient, but make sure that the reason you haven’t met him isn’t due to unfair requirements you have set. If “that guy” is defined by his job, car, income bracket, and things of that nature then good luck with that. Those things make finding him harder, and personally I think you should focus on finding a man you connect with. Without that connection, “that guy” will easily become “that ex” in due time.

12. You Are Waiting On GOD – there are many women who say they are just going to trust GOD and let him bring them a man. That is great, but there is a slight problem with that. Many of those same women take an approach of not doing anything to facilitate the process. They wait on GOD to deliver a man as if they are waiting on a shipment from FedEx. You still have to recognize what it is you are or are not doing correctly. If you choose to trust GOD to bring you a man, how about finding out what GOD needs you to do to get that man. Because if you are not the woman you need to be then you may find yourself waiting, and waiting, and waiting. Not because GOD can’t do his part, but because you haven’t truly tapped into doing your part.
Re: 12 Honest Reasons Why Some Women Are Still Single by Sanboy25: 4:34pm On Jun 11, 2013
Another list again ? undecided
silica: 6. Your Séx Is Weak!
Should a relationship always be about sex ...? undecided
silica: 9. Your too busy enjoying the “Single Life”

Maybe because this person simply doesn't want to involve in a relationship right now... undecided Better yet if they enjoy their life for the time being... undecided
silica: 11. You haven’t met “that guy”
That's the most sensible reason to me... smiley "Better to be alone than in bad company".

Very good list overall, well written, congrats grin

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