This is both a family and a Christian topic but I feel the posters in the family section will answer more sincerely.
I know we are taught to keep ourselves till marriage
The Churches and mosques teach against premarital sex yet as a Christian woman you want to marry a man who can perform and satisfy you in bed especially if you are not a virgin
You also want him well sized
There are people like my self who became celibate after a while to obey God and wait for the right one and wanted to save ourselves for the right one
You want the right one to be also right where it matters most
Stories abound of women who never tested the man and ended up with men with ED
Who wants that?
How else can a Christian woman make sure the commodity she is buying dey alright especially since we are taught that se.x before marriage is wrong.
Is it a conversation the couple should have I.e size and performance for those who want to wait till the wedding night?


( this is not about me,I tested my automobile before buying)

Sincere responses please

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babyosisi: This is both a family and a Christian topic but I feel the posters in the family section will answer more sincerely.
I know we are taught to keep ourselves till marriage
The Churches and mosques teach against premarital sex yet as a Christian woman you want to marry a man who can perform and satisfy you in bed especially if you are not a virgin
You also want him well sized
There are people like my self who became celibate after a while to obey God and wait for the right one and wanted to save ourselves for the right one
You want the right one to be also right where it matters most
Stories abound of women who never tested the man and ended up with men with ED
Who wants that?
How else can a Christian woman make sure the commodity she is buying dey alright especially since we are taught that se.x before marriage is wrong.
Is it a conversation the couple should have I.e size and performance for those who want to wait till the wedding night?


( this is not about me,I tested my automobile before buying)

Sincere responses please

Well...

This is a hard one. I guess what both spouses need to ensure is that they are both willing to learn and are not adverse to trying new things.

Okay, if it's a mutual agreement on both their parts that there should definitely be NO sex before marriage, what's to stop them from reading up about it and even watching the odd porn together? Just to prepare themselves for their wedding night.

There are loads of stuff and self-help materials out there on the WWW that they can use to enlighten / spicen up their love lives when the time comes. No one is born a sex pro, but over time and practice, one gets better. This should apply in this scenario.

taryour: Very funny thread. Me no get any answer in my head right now. I wasn't a virgin when I meet my hubby but my hubby was,though we both had intimacy before marriage he dint tell me he was a saint until the our wedding night. And oh my God I was over the moon and in tears at the same time.each time I remember theses I fall head over heels inlove with him all over again, Its almost 8years now and he is still rocking my world big time.

I know he is going to read this and blush.

Thanks for being sincere
I would like to hear from a woman that wasn't a virgin yet waited till wedding night not knowing if there was even a Blokoss in that shokoto
Let me hear more and also from someone that took the risk that we couldn't take

babyosisi:

Thanks for being sincere
I would like to hear from a woman that wasn't a virgin yet waited till wedding night not knowing if there was even a Blokoss in that shokoto
Let me hear more and also from someone that took the risk that we couldn't take

Surely they would be allowed to er...(cough)..'touch' each other before the wedding night na!

Efemena_xy:

Well...

This is a hard one. I guess what both spouses need to ensure is that they are both willing to learn and are not adverse to trying new things.

Okay, if it's a mutual agreement on both their parts that there should definitely be NO sex before marriage, what's to stop them from reading up about it and even watching the odd porn together? Just to prepare themselves for their wedding night.

There are loads of stuff and self-help materials out there on the WWW that they can use to enlighten / spicen up their love lives when the time comes. No one is born a sex pro, but over time and practice, one gets better. This should apply in this scenario.

We are not just talking about Knowing what to do when the time comes
How does the woman who wants to wait assure herself that the sumtin is even working?

Efemena_xy:



Surely they would be allowed to er...(cough)..'touch' each other before the wedding night na!

That is what I told another Christian sista
That if I didn't chop him i must assure myself that the sumtin can rise up
But then the sista reminded me that there are men that can get up but can't hold it up
That is a biiiiiiiiiiig problem
Still boils down to testing the sumtin as the only sure way

Where are the Christian men or Muslim men please join in

babyosisi:

We are not just talking about Knowing what to do when the time comes
How does the woman who wants to wait assure herself that the sumtin is even working?

Depends on the level of prudishness exhibited by both.

They should indulge in non-penetrative sex, including 0ral sex. That way, they still remain virgins (technically).

Efemena_xy:

Depends on the level of prudishness exhibited by both.

They should indulge in non-penetrative sex, including 0ral sex. That way, they still remain virgins (technically).

So God allows this one eh kwa.
This Christian race no easy o

babyosisi:

So God allows this one eh kwa.
This Christian race no easy o

Well, he doesn't disallow it. At least, not that I'm aware of.

They should just get their freak on and take it one step further by doing the 69 position. Unless the man has got a crocodile tongue, the hymen should still remain intact.

Efemena_xy:



Well, he doesn't disallow it. At least, not that I'm aware of.

They should just get their freak on and take it one step further by doing the 69 position. Unless the man has got a crocodile tongue, the hymen should still remain intact.

Bwahahahahahahahahahaha !!!
Thank God for grace o
Razor blade tongue and electric fingers not allowed

^^ Abeg, define electric fingers...

Efemena_xy: ^^ Abeg, define electric fingers...

Bwahahahahahaha
Fingers powered by NEPA with a back up gen set

Not ready for that , Still a player thanks!

Efemena_xy:

Depends on the level of prudishness exhibited by both.

They should indulge in non-penetrative sex, including 0ral sex. That way, they still remain virgins (technically).

One of my cous wife said they were told to kiss and touch( but not too much) when d weddin was almost at hand at marriage seminar cause I asked her this(Catholic church).said that she used d opportunity to size him up.as for d shape,she assumed it was ok.
Infact d topic came up when she complained bitterly that hubby was rough(virgin hubby)and she was avoidin d thing at all cost.it became a big issue cos hubby reported her and she naw said this.
I think d issue was finally resolved bw them cos she is happy with him.

Test driving is the only way

Interesting ..

dayokanu: Test driving is the only way

Lmao

As someone else said, touching it is a viable option.

Dis thread got me cracked up, osisi u must be very funny! Lmao, don't even know what to say or which is ryt, but i can't imagine a situation where d man can't perform or d tin is... After saying d i do, for beta for worse covenant, mehn d lady gatz live with it be dat tufiakwa! And i doubt a man in dis kinda situation will tell his fiancee b4 wedding, hoping a miracle will happen lool, even if u are a virgin or both of you are, directly or indirectly u av 2 find a way 2 know, no testing may be 2 risky!
Btw, am not yet married, but i think dis is important even dough funny! Lol

I waited till the wedding night to do the deed. My hubby didnt have much issue with waiting either because he's God fearing but there was alot of "ahem ahem" such as sucking/Oral Shags by both until d wedding night oh. so bearing in mind this, i kind of think i was able to see what i was signing upto for life

Me I was previously married so obviously not a virgin.
We waited because I had it in my head that all men wanted with a divorcee was hit and run, he didn't have a problem with waiting since it made me comfortable though sometimes he "tried his luck"
Anyway fastforward to after the wedding, Oh boy, that was when I learnt the beauty and awesomeness of S3x, I never knew women also got MouthAction till that day, I always believed that only men got touched and the works down under, he went down on me that night, and I had what I assumed was a mini stroke, I was confused, disoriented, I was telling him to stop because I was dying and yet felt a sweetness I never knew existed.
The crazy man gave me a smug grin as if to say "see what you don dey miss"

Since you asked for a religious point of view, I will try as much as chip my understanding.

A sane and healthy relationship is based on trust, sincerity and truthfulness. No matter the selfish end or satisfaction someone craves, God's standard/words cannot be broken. If we all live sincerely and truthfully by the rules, this world will be a better place to live.

A guy that knows that his power house has no source of life to perform, is bound by sincerity of a relationship to tell his fiance about his problem. If on the other hand, he fails to tell her and she kept to the book. She is at liberty to divorce the man for non-performance because the union itself is based on deceit and therefore cannot stand.

I know as a guy, you should know if the engine room is active whether you do it or not. There are so many signs given by the hungry and thirsty giant to show his prowess.

How does someone who decides to obey the books she reads to wait till after marriage confirm if her fiance's JT is active? Many ways to arouse a guy especially when with his fiance he never had a taste of. Occasional brushing of his back with the frontal power house runs life to the engine room beneath to stand at alert waiting for what to devour. Touching and rubbing his neck is another way to keep him at attention. I believe the ladies know the act of seduction better. Upon all these actions, the guy gets as cold as water from polar region, I guess, there is fire on the mountain.

The fact that someone has been randy and wayward does not make him better in bed than a virgin whose JT is active. The most important thing is readiness and willingness to learn new things. There are many books, websites and blogs for that. Pre-marital sex has actually caused more harm than good all in the name of testing before buying.

To any lady who discovered that her husband is "engineless" only after the wedding, you are at liberty to divorce him.

babyosisi:

We are not just talking about Knowing what to do when the time comes
How does the woman who wants to wait assure herself that the sumtin is even working?

if they truly have the hots for each other,a stimulating conversation in that direction can stir up d thing in between the man's legs.(that one is just to ascertain that something is there) Then to know if it's working,ask his ex-gfs i

^^^ Is seduction not a sin? Remember that even to look at the opposite sex lustfully is a sin and there is no sin bigger than the other.

Op, there is no way a christain lady can confirm "activeness" of JT before wedding. All she can do is have a heart to heart talk with her man concerning issues partaining to sex, hope and pray that she doesn't get a surprise package on her wedding night.

As for me, that is a risk I'm not willing to take. I rather "sin" and confirm the goods before purchase and ask for forgiveness later than thrive in uncertainty.

Nice topic.......following dis thread closely

bettymafy: ^^^ Is seduction not a sin? Remember that even to look at the opposite sex lustfully is a sin and there is no sin bigger than the other.

Op, there is no way a christain lady can confirm "activeness" of JT before wedding. All she can do is have a heart to heart talk with her man concerning issues partaining to sex, hope and pray that she doesn't get a surprise package on her wedding night.

As for me, that is a risk I'm not willing to take. I rather "sin" and confirm the goods before purchase and ask for forgiveness later than thrive in uncertainty.

Yes seduction is a sin as well as lustful thinking. However, the action suggested is not to seduce the guy in question to bed but to confirm if what he told you is true or not. He may have lied about his status. The intention is the key here. Not to derail the thread, how can one be forgiven if the person willfully sin?

Why is there increased rate of sex-ual distrust in marriages today? It is left for individual to determine what works for him/her and be ready to face the consequence later.

bellong:

Yes seduction is a sin as well as lustful thinking. However, the action suggested is not to seduce the guy in question to bed but to confirm if what he told you is true or not. He may have lied about his status. The intention is the key here. Not to derail the thread, how can one be forgiven if the person willfully sin?

Why is there increased rate of sex-ual distrust in marriages today? It is left for individual to determine what works for him/her and be ready to face the consequence later.

This topic is centred on how a christain lady can "confirm it" without have to sin. And the truth is, there is no way! Whether u are seducing him to bed or just to confirm, it is still a sin! So u either confirm by sinning (by seduction, kissing, smooching, oral or the main deal) or not confirm at all. There are no two ways about it

And no. . . We are not here to discuss the dangers of premarital sex. Save that for the right thread.

Very interesting topic and strictly for mature minds . Front page pls

Hmnn.. A very big Q.. This is what Usher Raymond means by "Caught Up"

Lilimax: Very interesting topic and strictly for mature minds . Front page pls

I bet you that when it gets to front page, it will be completely derailed. Nice thread though!

bettymafy:

This topic is centred on how a christain lady can "confirm it" without have to sin. And the truth is, there is no way! Whether u are seducing him to bed or just to confirm, it is still a sin! So u either confirm by sinning (by seduction, kissing, smooching, oral or the main deal) or not confirm at all. There are no two ways about it

I get your point. The best way is still via communication which he should be sincere enough to open up. At least our forefathers were not christian, they held chastity in high regards and were not put to shame in this area. Why? Because they were sincere in their dealings involving marital relationships.

OP, you have no locus in the matter. Are we to now see you as St. Baby_Osisi?

Oh well, if you are going to marry someone, you should be able to discuss your sexual expectations in an open and frank manner.

Questions like: What do you think about sex? What positions are you comfortable with? How much drive for it do you have? are not out of place for a couple that have crossed the proposal and acceptance stage in my opinion.

If it becomes difficult to talk about in the real world. Make it a virtual Q & A. The best thing is to have a medical examination I guess.

Muslim clerics that know their onions do ask the groom's father if his son is up to it. It is detested that a man with serious sexual problems marry a woman whilst hiding his condition.

But wait, isn't this topic a trifle bit hypocritical? How do people confirm they and their partners are any good before having pre-marital sex? If we don't ask this question, why should we ask it in the context of marriage.