Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! - Family - Nairaland
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! (4982 Views)
My Brothers Wife Is Dragging Remote Control With Me / Wife Keeps Marriage Going With Death Threat / Wife Keeps Ex Boyfriend Phone Number (2) (3) (4)
| Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Cashio(m): 8:34pm On Sep 17, 2013 |
.. |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by greatgod2012(f): 9:17pm On Sep 17, 2013 |
Cashio: I am a 21yr old guy and i am living with my brother and his family.my problem is that his wife is always looking for means to start up an altercation with me. she is not working(at home every day) while i am working with my brother and still hustling for my admission. she expects me to clean the house every weekend, fetch water from the pump, assist her in cooking, wash utensils and wash my brother's cloths...pls what should i do there is nothing wrong in living with your brother, whether married or not, but let me ask, in all sincerity, do you give her her desrved repect as your brother's wife? Do you help at home in doing chores, or are you the"its her work" type? If your answer to the questions are yes, it means she's a possessive and selfish type of wife, the type that do not want any hubby's sibling around, in that case, keep doing the good you are doing and ignore her tantrums, with time, she will either come around and accept you or overdo it until your brother hear about it and put things in its rightful places. However, if your answer to the questios is no, then, that is why she's behaving the way she is, nobody likes to be seen and treated like the maid of the house, especially for someone who is younger. In that case, readjust and change for the better. May God help you and all of us. 3 Likes |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Haywhymido(m): 12:22am On Sep 18, 2013 |
Yea, dat y i lyk it been on my own. I hate insult. Am d blunt type, u insult me i give it bck to u regardless of who u r.I don't kare. So stayin wit my broda means i shd wash his cloth? So y did he marry. Rubbish |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by ifyalways(f): 6:26am On Sep 18, 2013 |
Haywhymido: Yea, dat y i lyk it been on my own. I hate insult. Am d blunt type, u insult me i give it bck to u regardless of who u r.I don't kare. So stayin wit my broda means i shd wash his cloth? So y did he marry. RubbishYou are so uncouth, I can imagine what the woman at home is passing through. So because your brother is married to an unemployyed wife its a crime for you to help out in the house? You are too big and fly to wash your brothers clothes? Move out to your own house. Simples. 9 Likes |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Daresh(f): 7:30am On Sep 18, 2013 |
Haywhymido: Yea, dat y i lyk it been on my own. I hate insult. Am d blunt type, u insult me i give it bck to u regardless of who u r.I don't kare. So stayin wit my broda means i shd wash his cloth? So y did he marry. Rubbish You are a very stewpid boy. I know your type. If you know you won't wash those clothes you better move urself out of that house sharply. Olodo. I can't stand fools,  |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Nobody: 7:41am On Sep 18, 2013 |
1 Like |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Ngokafor(f): 7:43am On Sep 18, 2013 |
...A piece of advice for you @op....under no circumstances should you have an altercation with your brother's wife!especially if your brother does not have any major issues with her.Why i am saying this is that it's a fight YOU WILL NOT WIN!.. ....Do whatever you can to get along with her even if she gives you the attitude(it's not easy but achievable),from your write up,it's obvious you are totally dependent on your brother and cannot up and leave in a huff,therefore a little house work here and there will not kill you for peace to reign..besides you say you work with your brother right?..fine cos that means you aren't always around 24/7 so it shouldn't be that difficult for you should it?...however,am particularly surprised you even have a problem with washing your brother's clothes!  ...Finally,have it at the back of your mind that it's better to have problems with your siblings than their spouses(that's if you are staying with them).In most cases,problems with your sibling will entail their spouse trying to settle the dispute between you two(after-all there's a limit to how angry your sibling can be),while in the case of their spouse,your sibling in a bid to keep their marriage, will support their spouse(subtly or otherwise) making you the loser cos your stay in that house will be very shaky indeed....so be careful!! |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Ngokafor(f): 7:56am On Sep 18, 2013 |
Haywhymido: Yea, dat y i lyk it been on my own. I hate insult. Am d blunt type, u insult me i give it bck to u regardless of who u r.I don't kare. So stayin wit my broda means i shd wash his cloth? So y did he marry. Rubbish ..with this attitude,you'll be thrown out of your brother or sister's house so fast your head will spin 360degrees!...and if you are not independent enough to stay on your own ..then 'chopping of sand' will be your middle-name!  1 Like |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by pickabeau1: 8:05am On Sep 18, 2013 |
Is the washing of cloths now the dude's responsibility n no more the wife's? There was a post some time ago n I thought it was clear domestic duties are the wife's So after working all day, he will still come n wash clothes that a housewife is supposed to have done Who is the lazy one I laff in double standard Op.. u can move back to your parents home...if its not possible continue your bit, save n prepare to move out The 3rd poster n the 1st poster are different monikers so all the attack is confusing? 1 Like |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by veave(f): 8:08am On Sep 18, 2013 |
I SMH for you OP. and you are 21? |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Nobody: 8:11am On Sep 18, 2013 |
Some of us ladies can be real pain in the a*ss sometimes. I'm not trying to encourage the poster to be disrespectful or not to do things around d house but some ladies can sit all day watching African magic and what have u. Simple sweeping or vacuuming the house is a big task for them. As soon as those that went out comes in, what u will be hearing is *A, o and put water on d fire for garri, A, put rice on d fire and come and help me wash these clothes; A, check whether there is fuel in d gen, if not pls collect money from ur bro and go and buy. Fill the drum too, water has finished! Haba! Meanwhile A just come back from idumota after hustling with d bro from morning till evening. Poster, in as much as I don't like ur tune, u r a visitor in her house. If I were u, I will spoil her with kindness so that I will win my brother's favour. It also teaches u patience and endurance for the future outta there alone. Be wise. 7 Likes |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by mysticgal(f): 9:08am On Sep 18, 2013 |
move to your own house if you're not comfortable. |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by greatgod2012(f): 10:20am On Sep 18, 2013 |
pickabeau1: |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by feminineA: 10:55am On Sep 18, 2013 |
Its 2 sided. Its either she's a lazy full time housewife or you are the one with issues. Now what's the big deal in doing chores really? Chores doesn't kill infact it makes you a better person. Why not see her 'wickedness' as a trainning ground for a better tomorrow?? The earlier you change ur orientation towards her and chores the easier life becomes for you. And learn to respect your sil please |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by remsonik(f): 11:22am On Sep 18, 2013 |
@op,u are the lazy one here.can I ask you if you wash for your brother before he got married.If yes why can't u wash it now.if no then start learning how to wash cos its for your own good.btw u re still young and I know that your brothers wife should be older than you with some years. |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by fr3do(m): 12:53pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
pickabeau1: Is the washing of cloths now the dude's responsibility n no more the wife's? There was a post some time ago n I thought it was clear domestic duties are the wife's African man Ngokafor: ...A piece of advice for you @op....under no circumstances should you have an altercation with your brother's wife!especially if your brother does not have any major issues with her.Why i am saying this is that it's a fight YOU WILL NOT WIN!.. words of wisdom now my turn *clears throat* op,I suggest u make urself unavailable to her. *spend extra time with ur brother *go to errands that will keep u out of sight *spend extra hours at work *dont reply or give flimsy excuses when she argues with you. You are 21 for crying out loud she should get a maid. 1 Like |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Nobody: 1:14pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Her house her rules, u don't like em just GTFO If u had an inch of respect for ur brother u wouldn't even think for long when she told u about the laundries Even if she hit u out of anger, u ve no right to do so. I'm not justifying her oh If you really know how difficult it is to get a roof over ur head n the expenses of living alone. You will shut up n gladly help with almost everything in the house 1 Like |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Rhythm(f): 1:38pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
What is with all this insults on the OP. The OP wasn't rude, the third poster was, and those are different monikers, so I can't see why people who were to lazy to scroll up and check the monikers are raining unwaranted insults on the OP, instead of the advice he asked for. This is what the op wrote: Cashio:: What you complained about isn't only peculiar to your brother's wife. Some people just aint used to doing others favours, so once they see you need a favour from them, they try to milk you back as dry as possible. Since you are living with her, I suggest you choose two or three house chores you want to help out with, do it perfectly, regularly and religiously so that no one ever finds fault with it (for instance, always fetch water and wash your brother's cloth), and if she asks you to do anything extra, politely tell her you are going out or tired or something. If you don't go out a lot, spend so much time on your three chores that there would be no spare time for the extra errands. No one wants to harbour a leech, brother's house or not. You should do some housework and make them feel happy to have sheltered you. It might seem easy to be a full time housewife but spend a full day doing house work and you'd realise office work is way easier. No matter what you do, never insult your brother's wife, only consider her errands as a motivation for one day owning your own house  And here is what the third poster wrote. Haywhymido: Yea, dat y i lyk it been on my own. I hate insult. Am d blunt type, u insult me i give it bck to u regardless of who u r.I don't kare. So stayin wit my broda means i shd wash his cloth? So y did he marry. RubbishYeah so staying with your brother means you should be a leech. 2 Likes |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by maclatunji: 1:40pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
chaircover: LOL . ..I can see what the problem is. I am very interested in this "power of a woman". Want to know more about it... |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by krystal101(f): 1:52pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
@ OP, you want to stay in your brother's house like a chairman? Is she your wife? So what if she's a house wife? You want her to do all the chores and still cook meals for you? You better borrow yourself some sense you very young at 21 |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Nobody: 1:56pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Thank u @rythmn. Thought I was the only one that noticed that. |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Nobody: 2:06pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
@ Op. Inasmuch as its good to get involved with house chores, some women can really over-do it. I heard a gist once, where a married woman was giving a sibling not only her cloths but her undies to wash. Your cloths-ok ! your undies- not good! Because you married someone's brother or sister, does not give you the license to turn their siblings to your slaves. Respect is reciprocal! My advice to the OP is simple, if she is over-doing it and ONLY if she is over-doing it, speak to your brother about it, or leave their house and look for somewhere else to stay or just endure it. You really cannot live with someone forever, patience is the key. |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Nobody: 2:10pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
chaircover: LOL . ..I can see what the problem is.CC, they r not doing him any favour. He is a family. He is not lazy, he works with the bro while waiting for admission. He didn't say he is not helping out. Assuming the table is turned and it happened to be from the woman's side, I don't think pple will attack him the way he is being attacked here. Why r we attacking him? I'm sure the poster might be regretin why he asked for help and direction in d first place here. 7 Likes |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by deols(f): 3:37pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Some of the responses here are funny to me . The op is being judged by someone else's response. I see no reason why the wife has to turn her brother in law into her house boy. It is her house, hers to maintain and not the boy's duty. why should he wash the clothes, do the chores, etc. These are things he should do only if he wants to and not be forced to nor nagged into especially by a HoUSEWIFE. He is ending up as being more productive than she is. People who can't be good to others except that the others work for it really should be ashamed of themselves. The boy is 21 for God's sake-an adult! @Op, If Only I know your situation better, I'd know the kinda advice to give. If you are independent of them financially, you could just free yourself. If not, at least talk to her about it. That you bring it up may make her realise she is going too far. 4 Likes |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Nobody: 3:58pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Deols baby, where hv u been? Very busy I guess? Hv not seen u at d other end for a while naw. |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by greatgod2012(f): 3:59pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
With all respect, i see some posts being directed at op here and im not comfortable with them at all, the op wasnt rude at all in his presentation, why some posters are now raising abuses on him, i dont understand. Infact, im beginning to sympathise with the op because he is being taken as another poster. Olorun ma je ka je iya oniya o. Amin. |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Nobody: 4:06pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Haywhymido: Yea, dat y i lyk it been on my own. I hate insult. Am d blunt type, u insult me i give it bck to u regardless of who u r.I don't kare. So stayin wit my broda means i shd wash his cloth? So y did he marry. Rubbish This foooooooolish guy is not the OP so guys pls stop insulting the OP because ofr a Arrow like this |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Nobody: 4:12pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
chaircover: LOL . ..I can see what the problem is. I have a problem with people who turn their spouse's relatives to slaves. He is the husbands brother and not a beggar on the street waiting for favour. It's unfair to turn someone into something else just because you feed and clothe them 1 Like |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Nobody: 4:41pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
3 Likes |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Nobody: 4:54pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
No one is advising him to stay in bed and sleep in till afternoon. My point is do not expect so much from someone. I prefer to do my cooking myself, I clean the house myself, even hubby washes dishes and we don't expect any visiting relative to do anything for us. To be quite honest I don't see it as doing him a favour, I could do same and not see it that way. I see it as doing me and my generation a Favor, cos i am not only opening my doors but that of my children. I live and work for them, same thing my parents did and that is why none of us have ever been stranded and that's the same way we were brought up. No one should see it as doing anyone a favour cos when you do so , you end up expecting more from that person in return like the OP. Helping someone out is different from doing that person a favor. Doing that person a favour is like saying, hey without me....... 2 Likes |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Nobody: 5:07pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
1 Like |
| Re: Help!! My Brothers Wife Keeps Finding Faults In Everything I Do!!! by Nobody: 5:10pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Hmmmm I'm waiting for babyosisi and Bettymafy 's response on this thread .... hohoho ( clap hands x6) |
Divorce On The Rise In Nigeria: Why? / Woman Gives Birth To Set Of Twins After 17 Years Of Marriage / An Imo Girl Is Pregnant For My Husband. A Matured Advise!
(Go Up)
| Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 64 |